There are two kinds of parents.
Parents who bless and parents who curse.
What kind of parent are you?
Face it, your kids will always make mistakes. So here’s a million-dollar advice: Choose your battles. Many parents simply have too many battles with their children: untidy room, loud music, low grades, ugly penmanship. The list is endless. But if your child’s mistake is something that’s not morally evil, let it slide!
Instead, correct only when he cheats, or lies, or does something sinful.
But if your kid is just acting like a child—he’s restless, he’s importunate, he’s noisy, he’s clumsy, he’s disorganized—don’t get mad at him!
I repeat: Choose your battles well. Because at the end of the day, you want to praise your children more than you correct them by a ratio of 4:1. You need to praise your child at least four times more than you correct them. Here’s the key. Stop catching your kids doing “bad” stuff. You only reinforce this behavior. Instead, catch your kids doing good things—and praise them. What gets attention gets repeated.
And as the good grows exponentially, it displaces the bad spontaneously.
When you praise your children, you bless them.
When you praise the people you love, you’re actually blessing them.
Do It for the Rest of the Family
The literal meaning of the word “blessing” is “to bow down.”
When I bow down in front of someone, I give that person value. I say to him, “You’re important.” And the easiest way to do that is through praise. When you praise the people you love, you’re actually blessing them. Here’s my advice: Praise the members of your family at least once a day!
Husbands, make it a habit to praise your wife.
Let’s say she’s fixing herself in the mirror or closing the last button of her blouse and you happen to pass by. Stop and say, “You’re so beautiful.” Or your wife prepared your meal, and you take your first bite. Stop and say, “This is delicious!” Then hold her hand, look into her eyes, and say, “I thank God I married you.”
Wives, do the same to your husbands. When I come home from work, many times, my wife would wrap her arms around me and tell me, “You’re a great husband. You’re a great father. And I’m the luckiest girl in the world.” I receive praise from thousands of people—my readers, my audience, my listeners.
But for some reason, I still look to my wife to affirm me.
Some people say, “I don’t have to praise my family because they already know that I appreciate them.” That’s not true. You need to say it. My friend Ces is almost thirty years old. Yet to this day, she still feels like a little girl who’s still trying to earn the praise of her parents. She feels that her best is simply not good enough.
Ces told me that the only time her parents praised her was when she graduated cum laude in college. But before and after that, not once did they praise her.
Today, shackled by the burden of low self-worth, Ces keeps trying to prove herself to other people. It’s creating havoc in her relationships. It’s sabotaging her success. Despite her external success, there is so much emptiness in her. Without
knowing it, she’s desperate for praise, affirmation, and love.
And when you’re emotionally desperate for love, you rarely get love.
The people you love need your praise.
Praise someone today!
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