Do You Want Happy Relationships? Love Yourself.

Here’s my big message today: You can only have happy relationships if you have happy self-love.

Nope, I’m not talking about narcissism—or extreme selfishness. Here’s why: I believe selfish people don’t really love themselves.

Let me tell you my story.

       Two years ago, I attended my 25th Alumni Homecoming.

It was great catching up with old friends. We were all bigger, balder, and bumpier in various parts of our body.

       But what gave the heebeejeevies was walking through my old school building. I was overwhelmed with a flood of not-so-happy memories. I realized how much I didn’t like school.

You see, I was a very insecure kid.

I was very shy. I was introverted. I had pimples. I was so thin, they called me tipaklong (grasshopper). For Filipinos, my nose was large, so they called it a grand piano hanging on my face.

And some classmates bullied me. They called me names. They pushed me around. They forced me to do errands. And they made me their lifetime supply of pad paper. 

       In youth lingo, I was a Loser with a capital L.

But I felt all my classmates were so confident, so large, so outgoing, and so happy. They loved school. 

And so I asked myself this disturbing question: What is wrong with me?  Hundreds of times a day, I would ask myself this question. And for years, this question was my constant refrain.

What Is Wrong With Me?

25 years later, I know God has healed me because I don’t ask that cynical question as often anymore.

I now love myself.

I’ve grown in confidence.

And I’ve become successful!

       I have a wonderful family and fantastic friends.

       I’ve written bestselling books.

And my pimples are gone.

I’ve grown to my ideal weight.

My face is larger, so my nose isn’t a grand piano anymore. (Now it looks more like a church organ.)

       And thanks to my friend, co-preacher, and couturier, Adrian Panganiban, I dress well. Suits, ties, the works. He makes clothes for showbiz stars and has made it his personal mission to make me look guwapo. I think he has succeeded (Ahem).

But may I be honest with you?

At rare times, I still find myself asking that judgmental question: What is wrong with me?

       It’s amazing how after 25 years, a tiny part of me is still that insecure schoolboy that wanted people to like me.

My problem through all those years? 

I didn’t love myself.

       For decades, my heart was empty of self-love.

       But was my heart really empty? 

Your Heart Filled With Either

Self-Love Or Neediness

Imagine your heart to be an empty bottle.

But it’s not really empty. It’s actually filled with air.

       In the same way, when a human heart doesn’t have self-love, it isn’t empty. It’s filled with neediness.

The air in the bottle is a symbol of neediness.

But if you pour water in it, it pushes air out of the bottle. The more water it has, the less air it has.

       That water is self-love.

I believe the only solution to neediness is self-love.

If you learn to love yourself, you’ll push out neediness from your heart. The more you love yourself, the less neediness you have. The less you love yourself, the more neediness you have.

       Would you know neediness if you saw it?

Do You Have Neediness?

       Neediness, or a lack of self-love, is expressed in so many ways. Here are a few of them…

·        Some, like me, become people-pleasers. They’ll be kind, gentle, and smile at everybody so they’ll be liked. Because their substitute for self-love is to be liked.

·        Some achieve a lot, get good grades, and do great things. Because their substitute for self-love is to be admired.

·        Some rebel, get angry, disobey, and reject everyone. Because they’re substitute to be loved is to receive attention.

·        Some become victims of abuse. (Read my example later.)

As I said, I expressed my neediness in the first way—by becoming a good guy. All these years, people thought I was such a loving person. (I fooled you, didn’t I?)

But in reality, I wasn’t giving love; I was buying love.

I wasn’t giving love; I was giving neediness. Because you can only give what is in your heart.

Boy, was I miserable! 

Because I lacked self-love, it was impossible to have a healthy, happy, relationship with others.

       Let me tell you an extreme example…

The Need To Be Needed

Angela is married to her college sweetheart Marty.

But Marty is an alcoholic.

A few times a month, he comes home very drunk and beats Angela. He gives her a black eye. Slaps on the face. Bruises on the arm. 

When he wakes up, he doesn’t even remember what he did. 

Marty kneels down before a battered Angela and asks for forgiveness. He’s totally repentant and sobs like a baby.

But one or two weeks after, he gets drunk again and beats her up again. This insanity has been going on for seven years.

Many friends have told Angela to leave Marty. And she has. But Marty would find her and beg her to return. And out of love, she would return home—only to be beaten again.

But is it really out of love?

No. It’s neediness.

Specifically, the need to be needed.

Like me, Angela’s heart is filled with neediness, begging for love. Because she can’t find love, she mistakes being needed as love. And she finds it in her sick husband.

Angela’s neediness attracted Marty’s neediness. Two needy people needing each other. It was the perfect recipe for an unhappy marriage. (I’ll talk more about this later.)

I talked to Angela.

I told her the harsh truth, “You don’t really love her husband.”

“How could you say that?” she said, “That’s why I’ve stuck with him…”

“If you really loved him, and not needed him, you would have run away from him a long time ago and never went near him until he stopped drinking for at least 6 to 12 months. He doesn’t need gentle love. He needs tough love. Are you willing to give that?”

She closed her eyes and wept.

The Problem Of The Needy Heart

I’m going to expose my age again.

Remember this song by Basil Valdez? “It’s your smile, your face, your lips that I miss; your sweet little eyes that stare at me and make me say, I’ll be with you through all the way, ‘Cause it’s you, Who fills the emptiness in me…”

Lovely song. But here’s what I learned about relationships: An empty heart can only give emptiness.  And emptiness is another word for neediness.

Have you heard this song by Barry Manilow? “You know I can’t smile without you, I can’t smile without You, I can’t laugh and I can’t sing, I’m findin’ it hard to do anything…”

I’ll be scared if I have a friend who can’t smile without me.

I’ll be scared if I have kids who can’t smile without me.

I’ll be scared if I have a wife who can’t smile without me.

Or have you heard this one by Mariah Carrey?  “I can’t live if living is without you, I can’t live, I can’t live anymore…”

Beautiful song. But if you’re looking for a spouse, I strongly urge you to look for someone who can actually live without you—but who will choose to live with you—not because he needs you, but because he loves you.

But this isn’t that easy. Again, I must warn you: Neediness attracts neediness. A needy heart is naturally attracted to another needy heart. The reason is obvious. If you can’t get love, might as well get its counterfeit: neediness. 

That’s why some women are jerk magnets. They’re attracted to bad guys because they need to be needed.

The only solution? Replace neediness with self-love.

Because you can only have healthy relationships if you have healthy self-love.

Five Ways Of Filling Your Heart

With Self-Love


       Let me share with you the five powerful ways of how to fill your heart with self-love. I’ve tried them. They work marvellously.

       Many relationships are suffering right now because of neediness. When you learn to love yourself, your relationships will be freed from neediness. And your relationships with become so much happier.

But I must warn you: Five is a big number. You won’t remember them all. What I want you to do is choose one thing that you believe God wants you to do today. Just one!

Here they are:

1. Believe in your own worthiness

2. Fulfil your dreams

3. Care for your needs

4. Relate with the right God

5. Relate with the right people

Step 1:

Believe In Your Worthiness

Do this for me.

Place your hands over your chest and say this out loud, “I’m a wonderful human being. I’m a beautiful person. I’m blessed. I’m equipped. I’m anointed. I’m talented.    I’m loved. I’m prosperous. I’m generous. I’m wealthy in every way.”

Do you feel better?

Then say these statements twice a day, once in the morning and once before you sleep at night!

Personally, I had to change my constant question in my mind. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” I had to start asking, “What’s right about me?”

Get a piece of paper and answer that question. Write whatever comes to mind. The longer the list, the better!

       Second, go to a loved one—and ask her, “What’s right about me? What’s great about me? What’s wonderful about me?”

Write down her answers.

And echo the Psalms when it says, I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

       When you appreciate your worth, it’ll be much easier to appreciate the worth of others. And you’ll find your relationships growing in love.

Step 2:

Fulfil Your Dreams

       This actually saved me.

       I wasn’t very good with Step 1, “Believe In Your Worthiness”.

       But by God’s grace, I learned my mission early. I gave my first talk as a 13-year old boy and it changed my life. I suddenly knew my sacred mission.

       I learned to dream about my ministry a long time ago.

       But I had a hard time dreaming about my dreams—like what house I wanted to live in and how much money I wanted to earn or what car I wanted to drive. Because I felt this would be selfish. Shouldn’t my whole life be for God alone? 

But years later, I learned that to honor those dreams in my heart was to honor God who gave me those dreams.

I began to love myself by working on fulfilling my dreams.

Do yourself a big favor. First, know your dreams. Second, go and reach for your dreams.

Why will this bless your relationships? Because once you honor your dreams, you’ll be able to honor the dreams of others too. You’ll encourage people in your life to grow.

Step 3:

Care For Your Needs


       My wife calls me a low-maintenance husband.

       I don’t need much to be happy.

       A part of that is good. But a part of that comes from my past: For years, I felt guilty if I wanted something. Like it was a bad thing. I had to wrestle with that too.

       Later on, I learned to be aware of my needs and meet them generously.

       One of my strongest needs is to be quiet, to be alone, to read a book, to reflect. So I give that to myself as often as I can.

       My other need is to exercise regularly.

       And when I’m exhausted, I get a massage. My wife knows that if I want to feel loved, she’ll give me a foot massage. It beats a delicious casserole anytime.

       And about money. There was a time when I didn’t like spending for myself, just for others. Again, I felt selfish if I did. 

I could spend money as long as it’s for God or for others. But I’ve always had a hard time spending for my own needs.

Hey, perhaps this isn’t your problem. I know others who come from the opposite direction: All they do is spend for themselves and don’t give to God or others. Well, I believe God will pull you towards my direction. And we’ll meet somewhere in the middle!

But slowly, I’m learning. Last month, I bought a nice pair of headphones for myself.  It was the noise-cancelling headphones, great when you want to sleep in airplanes. I still couldn’t buy the expensive brand that costs P5000. So I just bought the cheap brand worth P800. But still, I felt wonderful.

       Being a simple person, I still have very few needs. But those needs, I try to honor whenever I can.

       Go ahead. Write your own needs on a piece of paper. And see how you can honor them too. 

Again, this simple act will bless your relationships because you can now serve people’s needs with a heart full of love, not neediness.

Step 4:

Relate To The Right Image of God

I’ve met people whose God is always angry and condemning. Then I’m sorry, prayer won’t help. Because you’re praying to the wrong god.

Fix your picture of God.

Read books on God’s Love. Talk to spiritual people who have the right image of God. Capture this vision.

And allow that God to love you.

Let Him whisper to your heart that you’re more wonderful than you can ever imagine.

This is one of the goals of the GodWhispersClub. If you’re not yet subscribed, log on at You’ll get a GodWhispers Email twice a week. It’s free.

       When you change your image of God, your relationships with others will change by leaps and bounds because you become like the God that you worship. If you worship a judgmental god, you’ll be judgmental too. But if you start worshipping a God of great compassion and love, you’ll (slowly) be like Him too.

Step 5:

Relate To The Right People

Remember: Needy people attract needy people.

So be careful with the people who enter into your life.

If you’re not careful, you may end up with an inappropriate number of what many authors call “Emotional Vampires”. These are people who suck out your love and joy. There are many kinds of Emotional Vampires: The Demanding. The arrogant and the self-righteous. The bitter. The unfaithful. The manipulative. Addicts. Parasites. Complainers. Critics.

Imagine your life as a three-seater couch.

Because you only have 24 hours a day, there’s a limit to the people who you can hang out with—in the same way that there are a limited number of people who can sit on that couch.

If the spaces are filled, they’re filled. Your life isn’t like Facebook where you can accommodate 5000 friends.

Here’s my point: If you’re always hanging out with Emotional Vampires who suck out your love, you won’t have time to hang out with great, nourishing, and inspiring people who can give you love.

Look. I’m not saying you should get rid of your toxic spouse or toxic mother. I’m not saying you don’t spend time with needy people. Love them! Remember that Jesus spent time with tax-collectors, prostitutes, and drunkards, reaching out to them in love. That was His main ministry. But He balanced this by spending time with his disciples and with His Father too.

So increase your time with people whose hearts aren’t filled with neediness but love. When you surround yourself with the right people, you fill your heart with love too. So look for mentors, teachers, and coaches who can bless you.

It could even be a virtual mentor. 

For example, by reading my Soulfood Letter each week, you’re “spending time” with me. You’ve made me a virtual mentor. (I’m happy to be of service to you.)

Proverbs 13:20 says, Whoever walks with the wise will become wise; whoever walks with fools will suffer harm.

Choose One Assignment From God

       Now that you’ve read all five actions, pick one.

       Not two, or three, or four, or five.

       Just one assignment from God for today.

1. Believe in your own worthiness

2. Fulfil your dreams

3. Care for your needs

4. Relate with the right God

5. Relate with the right people



But hey, whatever you chose is still pretty broad.

Write down what one specific action you can do today.

       Love yourself, my friend.

       May your dreams come true,

       Bo Sanchez

PS. Get Your Miracles at the KCon! Our biggest, grandest, most powerful event of the year, the Kerygma Conference 2009, will be on November 28-29. For the first time, it’ll be held simultaneously in Araneta Coliseum in Quezon City and in the Cebu International Convention Center—via “Live Feed”. It’ll be a miracle-filled affair you don’t want to miss. For Manila tickets, go to TicketNet at any SM branch or call (02) 7259999. For Cebu tickets, call (032) 4128142.

208 Responses to “Do You Want Happy Relationships? Love Yourself.”

  1. Really like this article!!!

    Go Bro. BO

  2. God bless your ministry brother!

  3. This post is a message that needs to be spread to everyone, Brother Bo! It’s a bull’s eye.

    I could relate with many of your stories, being an insecure person I too was in my school days. It was positive affirmation that allowed me to rise up. It sounded (still is) silly to keep saying all these positive things about you, to yourself, especially when you were the number one unbeliever.

    But unbelief was precisely why we needed those affirmations.

    And it worked (and still does), at least for me.

    Other people I know have made good use of positive affirmation themselves.

    To me, the most powerful affirmation is “I AM THE CHILD OF GOD!” Not only is it poweful. It is also very true (see Psalm 2:7), regardless of whatever circumstance one may be in at this time.

  4. love this article, I will be sending it to my friends, and family….your the best bo, I always love to see what you have going on. I want to subscribe to you monthly financial blessings newsletter, but right now finances are so tight, I cant even budget the 20 dollars…but business is picking up again, more clients, means I can start investing money in better things to help my business and my heart…..

    thanks so much…

    Sensei Ronald Panlilio
    NASM certified personal trainer
    Black Belt in Karate

  5. yes, i want to be in a happy relationship. and i have chosen to relate to the right God in doing the first step. you’re right bro. bo, i have been raised to believe in a vengeful and angry God. I want to know Him as a loving God. thanks! i started reading your blog since a friend forwarded to me your blog on genuine and fake love.

  6. i’m having fights w/my fiance.. almost everyday.. i aint happy.. probably because im too needy.. ok.. i’ll try to..keep my self busy w/ “fulfilling my dreams”.. as he is..maybe im jealous because he is living his dreams.. thanks Bo!

  7. A very practical yet realistic approach to loving yourself . For how can one extend that true love to others if he can’t love himself.

  8. thank you again … I am blessed by this article…will start with number 1:)

  9. Thank you brother Bo ha… kasi parang in the same boat din tayo… I was nobody in school and i know i have this actions now na gusto kong ipakita na i am nw far better frm them pero nakukunsensya ako saka tama ka nagiging needy na ako sa love and attention ng iba kasi d ko na practice na mahalin kung ano ako at mayroon ako…

    Salamat sa enlightenment…

    May u always inspire others more and more..


  10. i really like the article, it confirmed what i have always believe about love & relationship you can’t give what you don’t have…… thank you Brother Bo!

  11. Bro. Bo..Great article..I’ve considered you as my Virtual Mentor..But hope to see you in the future and meet you personally..Thanks for keeping my week always alive, Yesterday I was down and out, but I felt better today reading your article..You’re articles are my therapy..Thank you so much..You’re such a blessing. God bless!

  12. I would like to order by COD. your book….40 STORIES OF PASSION. How much is the book . If you can mail the book i would appreciate it very much. Tahnks and more power to you and all your spiritual eneavor. my address is Governor Office, Capitol, Kagawasan Avenue., . Dumaguete city

  13. Bro.Bo, Its really a great article…Its a wake up call for me..Parang binuhusan ako ng iced water sa ulo…i realized i never valued myself for a long period of time because all i did was to give way to a one way street relationship…Anyhow i was able to wake up from a deep sleep. Thanks so much…God speed

  14. Great article ! Now , I realized that it’s true that, ” Needy people attract needy people “. It’s an awakening for me. Thanks a lot. God bless you indeed .

  15. bo,
    well thanx from this article, i saved the copy so i can read whenever i wanted…you know i like your personalized interpretations your such a great instrument for everyone of an inspiration for realignment in doing better and to be more loving in all our ways….i thank God, i know my only one best friend where i shared your website had read the article.God bless and more power to your innate blessings from the Lord.

  16. THANK YOU BRO.BO for OPENING MY EYES and my mind sometimes im thinking you know me very well beacause of your messages which is very timely and very appropriate.I am struggling with this issue right now…you are right we have to love ourselves first before we can give love to others……..many thanks to you……il be starting now continue to enligthen me..

  17. thanks bo!

    i need to be reminded of this!

  18. Hi Bro. Bo, thanks for the very inspiring messages and articles. I used to attend the kerygma way back in iloilo every first friday of the month. Now m here in mla m attending every sunday at valle verde and i really felt so good and very blessed. Living alone and away from family is very difficult and challenging. We have the neediness of love and care of the people around us…especially of our family. Yes, self love is very important… In times i felt down, lonely and miserable…thank you for reminding us that life is beautiful..thank you bro. bo and bro. obet..for touching the lives of many people including me… mabuhay kau..=)

  19. Let me quote this: “Some rebel, get angry, disobey, and reject everyone. Because they’re substitute to be loved is to receive attention.”

    Because that’s me. When people bullied me when I was both in elementary and high school, I decided to shut out everyone so I won’t get hurt.

    I’m still recovering from my anger and my best friend of more than 10 years have been helping me.

    This article (and all others) have been very helpful to me.

  20. Bo,

    bull’s eye… “Needy people attract needy people.” you strike me through. I will start doing what you suggest.

    thank you so much.

  21. i really really love this article.. thanks bo now i know how to love myself. thank you and more power God Bless.

  22. Thanks for sharing!!! =)

  23. Thank you kuya Bo. I learned a lot from this article. I’m in tears because i experienced this- surrounded by emotional vampire people. It was intensely painful. And, I really don’t know what to do that time. But thanks God I’m free right now and I’m slowly picking up the pieces of my life. Again, thank you. This article will help a lot.



    P.S. Kailangan ka punta dito sa Davao? Please let me know. Thank you.

  24. yup, i believe in my worthiness. but without GOD am nothing. and i can live without HIM. that makes me worthy. thank you so much . HE only acknowledge my worthiness.

  25. Bro. BO,

    ROMANS 8:31; DEUTERONOMY 28:1-8; 3 JOHN 1:2, and many more.I remember Joshua 1:8.
    READERS, if you have the right God, then you must also have a Bible, read these verses. if you are interested, i can show you more verses how the right and just God loves us and blesses us.

    Bro. Bo may you continually be used of God to strengthen your brothers and sisters in Christ.


  26. corrections: I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT HIM…… previously send

  27. you are really a blessing, especially to people like me. i find comfort in your write-ups. more power!

  28. “learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all..”

    i finally understood the meaning of this line. i am still single and do not have a girlfriend, but i am happy, because i belong to a community that relates to the right God and i am hanging out with the right people that are also committed in the service of God and fellowmen. i also give time to myself by playing in gigs and concerts and spend some time alone doing fun things.

    i must admit that i recently got attracted to a girl is needy in every sense of the word. i spent too much time with her attending to her every needs until such time that i got into an argument with her coz’ of a simple misunderstanding. things changed from then on and i thank God that it happened. it was indeed a blessing in disguise. i must admit i miss the times i had with her now and then but i am still thankful for i now have more time for myself. thank God we have become friends again, though not as close as we once were.

    thank you bro. bo for this inspiring article. thank God that it is not bad to love ourselves more so we can reach out to others better..

    God bless!

  29. Auxie,

    it was understood.i saw that and i knew what you meant. Always, when i reason out with God…i tell Him “i am nothing without You my Lord.” So i ask Him to always go before me and direct my path.

  30. Auxie,

    it was understood.i saw that and i knew what you meant. Always, when i reason out with God…i tell Him “i am nothing without You my Lord.”

  31. I like this one!!! :)
    God bless!

  32. Reading your article is really a blessing especially working here abroad away from family and friends. I am really blessed that I had a chance to find your site. Actually I started reading your books way back in my college days. My first copy I got is “TO DATE OR NOT TO DATE”. Until now, your writings & advices inspires and encourages me very much.
    Thank you for this article; this one is a big help for me & to your readers for us to know ourselves more. Thank you very much
    God Bless

  33. Bro. Bo,

    An inspiring and wonderful articles..A powerful and an eye opener message to everyone…”Love yourself”. Thanks bro..Bo

  34. hi mr bo 😉
    you have encouraged me into something i have been wanting for many years…i am married…pls pray that however difficult things would be in this big decision im God’s grace, things will be alright,right mr bo? esp for my children..tyvm..God bless and More Power 😉

  35. This is a very powerful and enlightening article. Thanks and God bless you, Bo, for touching our lives :-)

  36. I’ve already done Step 5, by reading your article, Bo. Really eye-opening and inspiring. I thank you a lot for all these inspiration you bring straight to our mailbox every week, as well as the regular Whispers from God.

    The only way I can give back is to pray for you and your family, as well as your continued success in touching more lives. And, of course, by sharing these wonderful inspiration to my loved ones.

    I can’t thank you enough… but still, THANK YOU!

  37. since I subscribed to your soulfood, my life has changed.
    I know that I am becoming a better person and wife by just reading and following your advices. Thank you.

    More power!

    I thank the Lord for letting me know blog. May you touch more lives!

    P.S. I love this article so much.

  38. Bro Bo,

    I really want a happy relationships, and i want to thank you for enlightening me.
    every time i attended the feast, I felt i am enligthen and i am filled with love.I know how to handle my problem, when i am hurting , i can always recall what i learned from your talk and it ease my pain.

  39. ang galing galing
    thanks again for never ending articles bro. bo

    keep on the fire burning…


  40. thanks for another great article bro. bo!

    just like some people, eh para rin akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig because I became needy because I thought something is wrong with me.. I equate not having someone in my life with me not being lovable.. But your article made me understand things and gave me clarity on dealing with relationships! Yes, I have to love myself first before I can truly love others.. Please pray for me bro. bo!


    God Bless!

  41. Bo,

    You’re so great. I really love reading your articles and I’m very excited to wait for your articles every week.

    You make me and my family very much inspired not only about our relationship and financials but for God’s love as well, which is more important at all.

    Be a blessing to everyone and keep up the good works. Have a nice day & God bless.


  42. hello Bo,

    i like the article..and thank you for this..i have started the five suggestion though slowly lang pero surely naman..hindi pa siya 100% pero i made the step already and that am grateful..hindi ko rin naman masabi na isa lang doon ang gagawin ko..parang pwede ko namang magawa ng sabay basta slowly lang at regular lang..

    right now, am grateful dahil the Lord grant my prayer..nakikipag communicate na rin ang taong hinihingian ko ng forgiveness last lumambot na rin ang puso nya ..though hindi naman siya nag verbal saying that he forgave me na pero by answering my more than 7 months na email sa kanya at least he answered na..actually sa last na email ko sa kanya inaattached ko rin sa email na yon yong article mo about “Every Storm Will End”..

    masaya talaga kapag mahal natin ang sarili just glad timely lang talaga na may nangyari sa relationship ko but in a way madali akong nakahingi ng forgiveness at na forgive ko rin ang sarili sinabi ko after that hurting experience mamahalin ko na ang sarili ko..akala ko noon minahal ko na pero okay lang at least nagising ako at binago ko..kaya madali na ring magmahal sa iba..

    thank you again for this article..i hope and pray tuloy tuloy ang paggawa ko sa mga suggestions mo especially sa step 4 “relate with the right God” i know my God now..the loving, forgiving, merciful and compassionate God…God bless to all of us!

  43. thanks bo.. really inspired me a lot :)

  44. dear bro bo.
    thank you so much for this wonderful articles
    ang galing mo…

    God Bless!

  45. wow.. i thought i was actually loving when im with people who needs me.. im actually seeking for people who needs me.. kasi with those kind of people i feel so much appreciated.. but then tama ka bro bo.. it is not loving at all.. im actually needing to be needed.. at times na feeling ko sobrang saya ng kaibigan ko or ng boyfriend ko with their own lives.. nakakagawa ako ng away kahit di ko gusto kasi feeling ko di na ko mahalaga pa sa buhay nila kaya i just wanted to get away from them in any way possible.. im insecure tlga.. and i cant find myself worth.. grabe tong article mo bro bo.. hay.. and bro bo.. you are my spiritual mentor… and at times di rin ako makapaniwala sa mga nasasabi ko, your wisdom is infecting me.. and i wanted to share it to everyone..just the way you are sharing it with me.. or with us na laging nagbabasa ng mga articles mo.. may you be more blessed.. thank you po..

  46. bull’s eye bro. bo! thank you very much for a wonderful article. you are always guided by the Holy Spirit in writing so that hungry souls like me can be reached… God bless you and your family.

  47. Thanks. Bro. Bo! 😀

  48. thanmk u bro Bo! u know i really hated myself since the day i was born, i hated myself for not being so perfect. I just noticed all my flaws and not my worth. after reading this article, i realized that how can i love someone when i can’t even learn how to love myself.. How can i be able to express love to others when all i think is to hate myself. all the things that u have written in this article is so so true, i can relate to it. thank u.. i have become a fan of your articles. thank u for enriching knowledge to my mind. more power. Godbless us all!

  49. Thank you Bro. Bo!!!! thank you for reminding me that you can only give what you have 😛

  50. thank you bro. bo..i have made you as my mentor without you knowing have made me see the wonders of GOD..though sometimes i still fall and falter, but thinking of GOD i stand up and ask forgiveness for the acts and thoughts that are not glorifying HIM…you are such a blessing to everyone.

  51. thanks bo… this article is just what i need now…

  52. Pfft… I think the ‘neediness air’ just went right out of me… ! Thank God for this message Brother Bo!

  53. Hi Bo!

    Yup, i do consider you as my virtual mentor. thank God for you. Your articles just get me every time. Ever since i’ve been listening to you preach and reading your articles, you have made a positive impact on my life. You have helped to change my thoughts, my image of God, and the way that i look at myself.

    But i know that i still have a long long way to go. I want to live the kind of life that you live. I want to have that happy family life that you have. I also grew up feeling like such a loser, with a capital L. but you are living proof that when you walk with God, you can be victorious and feel like a winner. Thank you for inspiring us each and every time! :o)

  54. Hello Bro. BO,

    Thank you for the very inspiring article, its a very Great way to start my week… Yeah from now on your are my virtual friend and adviser.
    I am away from home right now i think I feel that emptiness but through your articles I found my refuge thank you so much. I can’t talk to anyone heart to heart to where I am now but after I read your Article I used to close my eyes and talk to God, and it feels so good…
    Thank you for the advises in your articles. This is a way for me to meditate also.. I think I am always doing #1, thats why i want to do the#2.
    I am still on the situation of realizing what are my “Real Dreams in life” and how would i know if that is God’s dream for me. I hope I can hear the answers you are telling me (but how would I know? pls Father God let me realize it) .

    May God Bless you always Bro Bro long live for your righteousness….
    More power to you…

  55. Thanks for a very inspiring article. God bless you more. :)

  56. number 3,care for my needs…and i need to read more soulfood, for my friends,for my family,for me,and so that i may know more about God…thank you!astig tlga si Lord…

  57. thanks Bo..this one is really inspiring..naka-relate talaga ako dito..and everything you say is the same as what Rick Warren said in his book “The Purpose-Driven Life”. i’ve finished the book already..thanks Bo for inspiring my life in many’s true that your my virtual mentor..thanks..God bless!!..:D

  58. Thank you and Praise God!

  59. I am reminded again of the Psalm…I am wonderfully made…self-love. Thanks bro Bro.

  60. Hi, Bro.Bo.

    Thank you so much for this great article. And now I started to learn to love myself! I can now differentiate what I love? and what do I need?

    God bless u and more power!!!

  61. AMEN!!!! thank you Bro. Bo.

  62. Hi Bro. Bo nakakabuhay ng loob ito. maraming salamat. God bless

  63. Hi Brother Bo,

    I can’t thank you enough for continously sharing with me your blessings especially the gift of wisdom. Your articles are always inspiring and I also love so much in receiving the God whispers the more I love God and myself which in turn helps me to love others more even those people who are very difficult to love with.

    Thanks a lot and may God bless you more for all the job well done.

    My warmest regards,


  64. I had a beautiful image of God–that was my saving grace all these years. I am growing tremendously in loving myself and you are so right in saying that it has moved neediness out more and more. :) Much love and light…

  65. I feel blessed just by reading this.
    I had to post up the link on my facebook just so everyone can see 😛

  66. You are a blessings to people like me who needs to be inspired everyday and feel the love of God more and more through your blogs….

    May God bless you always…

  67. Bro. Bo, sana you can visit Naga City, Bicol para we get the chance to see you in person and hear your talks about life, love and God.

  68. Touching word of God that can change the lives of everyone who believe.. thanks pastor bo

  69. Thank you very much, Brother Bo! I have been blessed with your message. I will seek and try to be in contact more with friends who will bless me and nurture me spiritually, emotionally and morally. The vampires in my college sure sucks the life out of me.

  70. thanks for all your wonderful messages..those were really helpful and timely!..thanks for giving answers to my’re a big blessing to me! Mwah!

  71. May God bless you richly and make all your dreams come true Bo!

  72. Brother Bo, thank you for ministering to me. Thank you for being my virtual mentor as you so aptly put it. You have no idea how much this article has affected me. It came at a time that I am actually questioning my value as a person and whether or not God loves me or just considers me a mistake. I am still in that state, which is why nowadays, I have temporarily halted my prayer time in the mornings. You are right. Unless I change how I view God, prayer is worthless and pointless. May I ask that you pray for me, that I can find the right God and know and feel that He loves me. Believe me, I fervently wish I can feel His love. But what I see right now is just His love for others far outweighing whatever He feels for me.

  73. Another good one from you Bro Bo! Thank You! God Bless you and your family! =)

    BTW, I like the photo with you and your son in so cute..

  74. As usual, always inspiring…
    Thx Bro Bo… ^_^

  75. Bro. Bo,
    salamat for every thing you many others you are also my therapy whenever I needed an answer to all my questions or problems in life lagi ko pong nababasa sa mga article nyo what are the right things to do..Thank you, may you be blessed hundredfolds..I will pray for you as you pray for all of us..:D

  76. Oh I love your articles so much, Bo…..!!!
    It’s so true! =)

  77. This is so inspiring… I hope i could create a happy relationship one day. Thank you Bo for always giving us enlightenment and for always sharing words of wisdom.

  78. I liked this post…made me realize that I have worth..During the past week i was asking myself the same question…”What’s wrong with me?”…This made me feel more worthy to love myself…thanks a lot for the knowledge you share…God bless!

  79. Thank’s Brother Bo! Your article was really very timely… I feel like a heavy thing was release in my heart because of what I have read! Just last night I was feeling so empty and unloved!!!! Thank’s a lot, really! I feel now that I am worthy….!

  80. Keep on “WRITING”, palaging JACKPOT

  81. Hi Bo,

    Thank you very much for this article. I know for a fact that I am a truly needy person due to my past insecurities as an overweight child. Reading this article punctured my heart a thousand times, but at the same time opened my eyes to my lack of self-love. Thanks for always taking the time to enlighten us as our Virtual Mentor, you just don’t know how much you are hurting me… ha ha (just joking!) but rather how much you are helping me to accept myself and God’s love in the process. I cannot thank you enough :)

    Good day brother Bo!

  82. this is great :) I inspired to fill in myself :)

  83. wow… I’m 17 and your article is
    really great. Bro. Bo, can you be my virtual mentor?
    I’ve been reading your books definitely two of it.. The 7 Secret of Success if im not mistaken and the 40 day Stories of Passion..
    and i share it with my friends and teachers..

    thanks for touching with God’s Love..

  84. Our living body wants more things, true relationships. But God has spoken through Jesus Christ, His Son. This is His message: suffering is necessary. Abandon our desire for physical satisfaction in this earth. He asks that we all share in offering our lives on earth for the benefit of the other person. And because one grows in maturity to serve others, he loses interest in himself, and all physical and material things. Each one’s spiritual growth comes via service to others. Saints even suffer like Christ.
    Soo self-love should not be self-centered. It should be Christ-centered and other-oriented. Amen?

  85. Dear Bro. Bo

    HO! thanks again for the grate article.

  86. I believe God has spoken to me…It really strucked me. Because, I have been depressed lately..I hated myself. and i’ve been praying to God to give me wisdom until I read your article.

    Thanks. I have always been touched by your soulfood articles that’s why I always look forward to it every week.

    God Bless and more power to you!

  87. I love myself!
    I will fulfill my dreams!

  88. Dear bro. bo,
    I love your article…you’ve really addressed the problem of my marriage..somehow i was be able to identify our differences…we’ve learned a lot…the lessons are practical..after 22 years of marriage, this could be a good start for us to have a happy relationship..Thank you bro. bo for the gift of wisdom. it brings hope to many hopeless people…May God Bless you always…

  89. thanks bro bo! this is really inspiring.

    yeah, i should love myself first because i need to give love to others. i can’t give what i don’t have.

    can’t wait for another article.

    God Bless.

  90. hey brother bo!
    another two thumbs up for this article..:)
    u really inspire me a lot and learn new things from ur articles..

    looking forward to ur new writings!
    keep the pens moving!


  91. Thanks Bo for reminding me that I am wonderful to God and that I am love by God. “Godbless.”


  92. Your story about Marty and Angela was just like my parents’ story.As far as I could remember,everytime my father gets drunk,he would fight with mom and hurt her.We were six children and I’m the eldest.All of us will just cry when it happens.The following day,when he’s not drunk anymore,it’s as if nothing happens,back to normal.It became a cycle.Some relatives said she should leave him but she didn’t because it will be hard for her to raise six children and she doesn’t want a broken family.
    Fast forward,5 of us are married now and my parents are still together.We finished school through their efforts(he was a driver,mom was laundrywoman)and because he’s old,he doesn’t drink alcohol anymore.
    Is it just neediness that kept our family whole?or my mother’s just a martyr?

  93. hello Kuya Bo,

    again,another inspiring article..thank you so much for sharing your wonderful wisdom..I will start with no.1..

    Looking forward for the nxt article.


  94. Thanks Brother Bo! Very relevant and inspiring article! I hope I can change; this article has been a tremendous eye-opener. More power!! =)

  95. Thank you Bro. Bo for being my virtual mentor ; ) I get so much blessings after I read your soul food.

  96. ” Love God above all things and your neighbor as yourself. ” says our Lord. Loving oneself is allowing God’s love to dwell in our hearts, so in turn we can radiate His Love to others by our good works , and that they may give glory ONLY to God. Without God we are nothing. In Him depends our whole being; in Him we move. He is the air that we breathe. ” Man cannot live by bread alone, but from every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord ” , says Jesus.
    True, how can one smile again, ( as Barry Manilow sings ) , if God is not in one’s heart ? Or how can one live again, ( as Mariah Carrey sings ) , if living is without God ? How dark the world of a soul would be, if it does not possess the Light of Jesus, the Light that dispels the obscurity of pride and vainglory ; the Light that makes us humble again and being capable of loving others as God commanded us to do.
    Have a very good day everyone !
    Thanks so much Bro. Bo for this sharing and for this precious space.
    God bless you and your family.

  97. this is brilliant bo! i havent realized that i am becoming the needy person already..which made me a little sad for a while there while reading the article. however, i made a promise to myself that i should take action immediately, that’s why i’m going to choose #1 first, believe in my own worthiness.
    thanks bo!

    more power and Godbless!

  98. Brother Bo,
    Thanks fortha inspirational article you dont believe that many of us are struggling this issue like me,By reading this article i have learn that by loving yourself first is main ingridients of loving other people too.
    Im selfless person,but now i am feel more confident and so much togive!
    thank you more power1

  99. thanks for really inspiring me. you are a heaven sent! i thank God for sending you to my life as an instrument of His love. i am now filled in with His ardent Love, i am so blessed!

  100. Wow! This aricle is very timely or me. Thank you so much. I was feeling a bit down but ater reading this, I really felt refreshed. Thank you bro. Bo…i’m also looking forward for the Kerygma conference in Cebu next week :)

  101. Thanks for this article.. It’s a big help! :)

  102. every time i read your blog i was more blessed bro. bo.. thank you so much.. i really love reading your works..
    God Bless us always..

  103. Good day Bro. Bo!
    I’m so blessed every time i read your article. And thank GOD for using you as His instrument in giving His messages to me.
    Now I’m learning to love myself and i will try to live by myself, not always depending with the strength of others. And I also prayed to GOD that my husband shall do the same, because he is so dependent to me, that sometimes I can’t breath anymore.
    Thank you for teaching us to grow independently.
    I believed GOD will answer all my prayers.
    Thank you Bro. Bo for the past 6 weeks of teaching regarding relationships. It helps our family.
    P.S. I was so blessed emotionally and spiritually after reading your book ” How to turn THOUGHTS into THINGS”
    Thank you. GOD bless you and your family esp. your mom.

  104. Thank you Bro. Bo. This was a great article.

  105. It’s an inspiring article… Congrats bro. bo. Keep it up…

  106. Wow…. you are right… you can’t give what you do not have… Love yourself first before you can give love to others… Keep it up bro. bo. You are an inspiration to many..

  107. THANKS BO!




  108. ako ba to? akong-ako to ah! thanks bro bo! God bless us all with all our unworthiness. He is the only One that gives us real worth.

  109. Hi Bo,

    I Like the article, nakarelate ako.. Up to now kasi may times na mababa ang self esteem ko. Mas naniniwala pa ang iba sa kakayahan ko kaysa sa sarili ko.. Your article enlightens me a lot.. Salamat.

  110. Hi Kuya Bo. Thanks for this article. I almost cried. I tried so hard to nurture my family, my relationships with my sisters coz family is so very important to me (we dont have a father anymore & mom is 75). But one of us is paddling away from us ( reading ur article about relationship drift). We tried to pull her back but it seemed she dont want to. So, we always argue, she dont want to be commented or reprimanded coz for her she’s right. we cant fix her. & the sad part is she doesn’t respect our mom. she dont give her love, understanding, patience & care To top it all she even exchange her daughter to a man she just met months ago. She’s becoming an emotional Vampire. Im so sad BO. pls. pray for us. Pray for her. Thanks!

  111. thanks!! i really love this article and im reflecting on it…

    hope to read a lot from you my virtual mentor!!!

    great job! =)

  112. really a very inspiring one. It made me feel good. thanks a lot Bro Bo

  113. helo Bro. Bo,

    I can’t but be thankful for your great insights.
    It helps me re-evaluate my life, family, friends and community…

    God bless!

    Gerome Dalipe II
    Loyola School of Theology
    Ateneo De Manila University

  114. Bro.Bo

    Ikaw ang instrumento ni Jesus para ma”healed”
    ang mga tao,lalo kong nakita ang kadakilaan ng manlilikha sa pamamagitan mo.Mabuhay ang Kristong Hari!

    Sol. Seming

  115. Thank you for keeping me in the right track. I have been giving myself so much because I believe I have so much love to share. But I forgot to answer my needs.

    God bless you for God’s glory.

  116. THANK GOD for Bro.Bo.. who unselfishly shares his life to us

    I was touched by your message & copied all the steps needed on how to love myself.. i guess that is what i really need now…

    You inspire me Bro. Bo to stand up against the trials i’ve experience now…

    More power to you and to your team…

  117. oh bo! youre so great…. so nice,,, its kind of a wake up call…. treating myself and spending something for myself was so hard for me,,,, thanks Bo!!! what a great advice….. spread the Love!!!!!

  118. This article is so FREAKIN’ helpful! Why?

    1) You were specific about the practical steps to achieve self love. I will work on that. Let’s see what happens

    2)Changing my image of God. Have tried working on my dreams but have not been convinced that God wants me to succeed. That has been getting in my way. Subsribing to GodWhispers is slowly revealing a different side of God. Have started to share those with friends

  119. Bo,

    I want to work on a project with you! Has something to do with helping people achieve their dreams.

    Do you have a private email address?

  120. Great artical I can relate to it in may ways.

    I do have a question, How can you do number 5 when your spouse is forbids you from allowing you to spend time with those that fill you up? when I do spend time with them its viewed as a threat to her and she then proceeds in tearing me down again.

  121. Thanks Bro. Bo for being my Virtual Mentor. Continue to be a blessing to others.

  122. dear br. bro,

    i really thank the Lord for giving us a person like you, who never fail to inspire people to be good.

    god bless,


  123. Hi Bo,

    I was a bid sad a while ago, searching for a happy food and ended up with a slice of chocolate cake in a nearby coffeshop when i decided to open my notebook and surprisingly my eyes catched your email… I feel better now (not bitter)..



  124. Thanks for sharing your love Kuya ^^,

  125. I was on the bus on my way to Quiapo when I felt this, this emptiness in my heart. It was sudden. I analyzed what I was feeling and then it struck me. I was feeling unappreciated for all the good things that I have been doing. I texted my wife. Told her what I was feeling at that time. I was feeling miserable. I told my wife that when I get to Quiapo, I will proceed directly to the church and pray.
    When I got to the church, I let out my feelings, covering my face with my cap so that I wouldn’t be obvious that I was crying like a baby.
    After praying, I realized that I was being selfish. Brother Bo, I was feeling that selfish desire of being needed and appreciated. I realized that I probably was feeling empty because I wasn’t filling my heart with love, I wasn’t even appreciating myself anymore. It was when I came to a point that I stopped recognizing the Lord’s blessings that I felt empty.
    I talked to the Lord, asked His forgiveness, thanked Him for everything, and I promised Him that I would love myself as He has been showing me love and making me feel loved.
    I felt great when I left the church. I felt the Lord’s loving arms once more.

  126. kuya bo,
    thank you po for inspiring me in your own little way.accidentally lang po nakita ko kayo sa tv.nayon po lagi ko na po kayo pinapanood kc hinihintay ko po kayo pag ngkwekwento kayo,ewan ko po pero nung sunday,ewan po bakit bigla lang po tumulo luha ko sa kwento nyo about a girl,na my sakit na husband who never sumuko ng 8years sa husband nyang may sakit.thank you po na naging instrumento kayo ni GOD para mapalapit sa kanya.more power po sa inyo.

  127. you inspired many people…you are the instrument of Gods message…you reminds Gods gift to us…thank you for sharing you thoughts…God is with you always…God Bless You Bo…

  128. Thank you for sharing your thoughts…more power…God Bless…

  129. Thank you Lord for Bo Sanchez. He never fails to talk straight to my heart, in particular times that i needed the right words to hear.

  130. thank u kuya Bo, for inspiring us by ur thoughts, God bless u more and more.

  131. Hi Bro. Bo! I’m so greatful to God for giving us a wonderful person in you. Thank you so much and may God bless and keep you always! Ingat lagi! ( :

  132. Thanks Bro. Bo, You’re indeed an inspiration to us, your readers and believers. God Bless You! Always keep us posted and don’t be tired of sharing your thoughts, messages of God to us. Thanks very much.

  133. Dear Bro. Bo,

    I noticed that whatever assignment we choose from your list, it still redounds to loving ourselves in order to gain competecnsies in loving others.

    Thanks for the inspiration Bro. Bo.

  134. Thanks for this article sir Bo. Your articles are the diesel or high octane of my daily lives as a good christian for my self, the people around me and the blessings I am receiving. Thank you sir. God Bless you and your family.

  135. HI Bro. Bo,

    Thanks you for another wonderful and inspiring article…

    God Bless us all!


  136. This is exactly what i am planning to do as i wake up this morning and head for my work. Yesterday, I talked to two people whom I considered as my family although we are not blood related. I helped them to the very best I can without any questions and favors; and yet they didn’t appreciate what I did for them. But I know my worth and that’s enough.
    Bro.Bo even when I’m in the Philippines always read your article while waiting for my turn in RCBC and now that out of the country your still my adviser, my preacher and my friend…Thanks!

  137. hi Bo,

    Thank you for the guidance and spiritual nourishment that you inspire in each one of us….God bless you!

  138. hello brother bo,

    me too…i can relate to your stories when you were in high school….i was very insecure especially that i came from the province then transferred to the city and to a university…..most of my classmates were rich with nice clothes, things, skin and everything that i felt i dont belong…but i still have friends….. i cant even help comparing myself to others that time that i resort to self-pity….i still have insecurities now but not that worse as before….thanks brother Bo…..GOD BLESS

  139. Hi again Bo!

    Thanks again for the inspiring, wonderful, heart touching mind enlightening article. I made myself complete. I choose the step 1 believe in your worthiness. May you inspire more people looking for love and seeking for themselves. God Bless you and see you soon!

  140. is it bad to strive for good grades???? iv been doing that since i was little. people expected a lot from me so i felt compelled to do good in school. wat if fulfilling your dream meant working hard for good grades which will please other people and also myself?

  141. its an awesome article.. thank you bro. Bo.

  142. Bro Bo,

    This is a great article! I accept that you will be my virtual mentor. :)

    I’ve cried after putting my hands on my chest and saying the passage above. I am very touched after saying that. Now I’m learning to love myself more. 😀

    Thanks for and inspirational blog my virtual mentor! May God Bless Us All!


  143. Bro Bo,

    Thank you so much for this article. I sent this article to my brother who is currently discerning if he would stay or leave his wife who kept on verbally, emotionally, and physically abuses my kuya. The only thing that makes him keep his marriage is that he is afraid to be alone and he was convinced by this Christian Minister in Singapore that annulment is a sin.

    I ask for prayers for my kuya that God will enlighten him about his marriage and that he’ll be able to find someone who can truly minister to him.

    God bless,

    PS Bro Bo, I really wish that you would come up with a book about annulment. The Exorcism book you published was very helpful to me and my family as well.

  144. wow! what an article! kaya pala ako…… grabe, y have to understand pala anong nangyayari sa sarili mo parang troubleshooting. Thank God we have like Bo!

  145. thank you brother bro for a wonderful artilcle !!! i feel soooo much blessed by just reading it.. al these time i have read ur article every week and now i ve print them out and made a compilation. its always with me wherever i go.



  146. Thank you brother bo! You were always one very influential person in my life! :) Thanks for being my virtual mentor!

  147. Thanks Bo for being our virtual mentor. Your articles are always inspiring. God bless!

  148. forever thank you!

  149. Thank you for this article Bro. Bo

  150. Dear Bo,

    Thank you for this very inspiring article. Yes, I need a virtual mentor.

  151. Dear Bo,
    Your article is just simply wonderful, just this morning or for the past days, I am really broken because of someone..All these years I keep on asking myself why I always have failure relationships…I keep on asking God why..why ..why…just this morning I really cried hard before God and asked Him again..thank you very much for this article.You’re right, sometimes its so hard to love and get the same love in return..and sometimes reality hurts but then still you can’t let go..with this..I think little by little in following the different steps I learn to love correctly and be loved right…god bless you..and continue to be an inspiration and blessing to others. Godspeed!

  152. thanks Bo, i’m blessed and inspired with this article. more power and God bless always.

  153. Thanks Bro. Bo!

    I knew for a long time na may problema sa ‘kin and now I know that there’s a lot of neediness in my heart (specifically the neediness to be liked and admired).

    Your write-ups are the best! Na-inspire mo ko! I’ll try my hardest to believe in my worthiness in this big world! ^^

    God bless and more power!

  154. Thank you for this article…really mean so much to me…Keep up the Great Work for God and for the people He entrust under your….Kudos to you Brother Bo.

  155. i can relate to what bro. bo had told in this article bec. up to now i’m still asking the universe and even God what is wrong with me. how come other people don’t want me to be in a relationship, but now upon reading this i began to realize so many things and I know God find a way through bro bo to help me overcome the feeling of neediness. tnx bro bo as always and I would really make an effort to follow what you have said so that I can be a worthy person not just for others or for myself but for God as well.

  156. I just wanna say Big Thank You! to all the spiritual nourishment you are sharing! God bless!

  157. i just wanna say THANK YOU SO MUCH.. i got almost the same situation… i really dont know how to control myself.. its like, im buying love just to be happier.. i know he loves me but for me its like im happier if i give him what he wants or what will make him happier.. thats why most of the time i feel scared.. im so happy and i feel so inlove.. and i feel scared of being alone… i hope this article will work for me.. a big thanks and please wish me luck.. if you have some other advice that can give me.. please do send me.. gonna be a big help.. Godbless you and your family.. :(

  158. and yea.. i read almost all the comments.. and like i said same situation.. im craving for love, care and attention.. i really dont know how to change it.. i want to but i dont know how to start.. now with my loveone, i feel secured, happier and loved but im so scared coz i feel im starting to depend on him.. i feel scared of being alone scared of losing him.. scared coz im starting to forget myself and i want to change it i dont know how to start.. i just want to happy thats all i want.. :( anyway thanks bro for this article.

  159. This article is the answer to my prayers. One day i realized that im ashamed of myself. And i ended up not knowing how to so;ve such a problem. Thanks Bo!

  160. Sir bro… ask kolang po… masama ba mg 5’6?

  161. Hi Bo,

    I’d just like to ask, what kind of person do you think you would be now if you still have the same insecurities as you had when you were a kid? About your appearance, your abilities, your failures, etc? Do you think you would still have the same confidence and the same positive outlook that you have now?

    Do you think that in order to be confident, a person has to get rid of the things that makes him insecure first? What if he’s already been trying to improve himself but it’s just not been working? What if there’s no solution to his problems or he doesn’t know the solution because he doesn’t know the cause in the first place?

    Also, what can you say about those instances when a person needs to rely on prescription drugs in order to achieve his healthy self-image. For example, taking birth control pills for acne problems, diet pills for weight problems, or sleeping pills for insomnia, medicine for depression, etc? Let’s say, if he continues popping a pill, he looks great and he feels great, thus he becomes confident. Also, is it ok when a person has to rely on expensive treatments to get rid of their insecurities, which are both time-consuming and budget-consuming. If he stops the pills or the treatments, his problems come back again, and he starts to feel bad again and loses his confidence.

    I guess my question is do you think it’s better for a person to spend his money and/or use medical aids to make him feel good about himself and love himself, than for him to feel negatively about himself and not be confident? Take note that the treatments and medicines are to be taken continuously (no overdosing though), and if he stops, his problems will re-occur.


    I am currently STARTING to love myself, leaving (literally) the people whom I did my best to love for such a long time but never felt being loved back. (unfortunately it’s my family. I’m single by the way.) It is finally time to give myself the chance the love I trully deserve… also in preparation for the coming of my one true love. =)
    God bless you.

  163. hi bro. bo! nice one! 😀
    your article i’ve read today is really good.
    yeah, you’re right, our emotions or let’s say life perceptions can really magnet the forces behind us whether it’ll be positive or negative. it’s really true that there’s a lot of emotional vampires in the world.. e.g., once in your life you’ve been with smart but manipulative people.. and, now, you’re with average people, but then you’re not able to ask them to do special tasks because they don’t have the enthusiasm to do them, and so, ending up of being parasites on your own body..
    but, i believe i can still handle these different people..
    [ “say what you feel and be who you are; because the things that mind don’t matter and the things that matter don’t mind.”] …hehehe parang tongue twister…..
    but then , i still thank you for reminding us that we are filled with wonderful blessings…

    good day! 😀

  164. this article is very inspiring.. Nakakarelate ako,.. I would like to be filled with self-loved.

  165. i’m glad i read this article..

    i’m a bit teary at this moment..

    I just gone into a broken relationship..

    And im asking my self over and over again, why does he changed. Is it hard for him to love me ’til the end?

    I’m needing someone to love me. Im needing someone to need me.

    Its really hard to start with step one. But i will do it. I know God will show me the way to find myseld and love myself.

    Thank you Bro Bo.

  166. […] a tip, you can read Brother Bo Sanchez’s blog about loving yourself. The article is called: Do You Want Happy Relationships? Love Yourself. This is the answer to my insecurity. The last time I checked, I lost the love of my life again for […]

  167. This is such a great article…
    It made me open my eyes, my heart and my soul.
    I really can relate it with my self. . .
    Thanks for the inspring thoughts Bro. Bo! *_*

    May God shower you with so much blessings!

    >>>> Daz

  168. i honestly still can’t understand this..

  169. y to choose one if it is called “steps”, so it should be all follow…ryt?

  170. this post is so moving that it made me write a comment!
    wow! I just realized how needy I was !
    Thanks Bo for this wonderful post!
    It changed me

  171. WOOOOWWWW, Bro. Bo you always bring me more closer to GOD. GOD Bless Us All. Salamat Bro. Bo!

  172. thank you for your inspiring stories. it truly lifts our spirits!
    keep doing this!

  173. I love this inspiring article. I am glad to visit here. I’ll always visit your page because it uplifts my spirit. Thanks, Brother Bo Sanchez. I am one of your million fans. I’ve been reading your magazine and even bought the inspirational songs in tapes before. I love reading your articles. God bless and Happy New Year!

  174. hi this so applicable…i want to share my own story about THE NEED TO BE NEEDED. nakarelate ako dahil yung life ko with him is like a living hell!! sinasaktan physically,mentally and emotionally.

    PHYSICALLY because i got black eyed too, body pains and even giving a signal gun fire in his own house carrying our child.

    MENTALLY because he keeps telling me that NOBODY WILL ACCEPT ME because I’m already a MUM and he always telling me that i am so stupid. yes i am because i loved him with all my heart..

    EMOTIONALLY because he cheated on me..and i even read some of texts from his GIRLS!!

    i wanna share it all..but this memories keeps my heart in pain..:(

  175. nice one! i guess i have to add you now on my facebook account and be my companion and inspire my life, bro. bo! or maybe change my life big time!
    you know what i always remember your advice in your articles and your book that i have, it’s kinda weird at first because im really not a good reader i kinda forget the things that i read and its hard for me to get interested on a book, those love story books, its sucks!! but your writings are different it keeps on inspiring me and it really feels great. no joke!! i look forward on your tv program and hope to catch it on a more convenient timeslot. GODBLESS YOU MORE & YOUR FAMILY!!

  176. Hi Bro,

    I’ve really learned something in this article an eye opener. I now spent really time in reading your blogs, it is very inspiring and indeed a reality.

    Taking a step is really hard, but with God we can endure all the impossibilities like how bless i am in taking courage to write a piece of something with regards to this article.

    Godbless more and continue to be an inspiration to others!

  177. Thanks brother Bo for your brilliant gift of words. Through this blog, I learned to appreciate myself more. The feeling of rejection is not an easy one, it feels like I am dying a thousand death, especially if it comes from a person whom you thought God’s answer to all your prayers. But while reading this blog, I realized that it happened maybe because I failed to recognize my worth and I didn’t care for my own needs and I failed to relate with the right people that’s why I ended up with some emotional vampires. Thanks brother Bo for the inspiration, when I am at the lowest point in my life, I always turn on to your blogs and Kerygma magazines to lift up my troubled spirit. God bless!

  178. Hello Bro. Bo. Thank you for this wonderful words. I’ve realize that I should love my self so I could love others by the love of God. I really want a happy relationship. :) God bless Bo.

  179. this blog is very nice….i can relate well.. i can be myself because Bo is being himself too..keep it up bro. bo..we love u

  180. love this artcle! your artcles are always on the rescue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thanks alot bo 😉

  181. ‘LOVE your neighbors as you love yourself”

    ‘LOVE (charity) begins at HOME’

    I thank God for a giving me a family (my wife, kids, parents, siblings & in-laws that are GREAT in good times and as well in bad times!

    Praise you O’ LORD! :-)


  182. It’s so inspiring bro bo! i hope this may help me attain my goals. i am a fan of your blog. Thank you and more power!

  183. Hi bro. bo, even though this article if quite long already. Im just enlightened what you want to stress with this article. I just came into a not successful and not happy relationship, and I’m clueless of what’s really the problem why we had to be separated. I guess now, it answered all my questions, I don”t love myself. I just gave everything to him that time to the point i sacrifice my personal hapiness. Im a battered gf, i can say i am emotionally abused. This article is so so true. Some guys,or may be the guy I loved before was so contented that each sorry on txt or call I can be easily forget everything because I thought i love him. I guess go is right its not love its a need for me, for him to stay because im used that he’s there for me all the time. Thnx for enlightening me and thanks for him in suggesting me to read on ur article! I can proudly say i will be a strong person now!God Bless and more power!

  184. i can relate to this article. Grabe. You are really a genius mentor. You enlighten our soul by sending inspirational articles. I started reading your articles when i got hired from my work. i have so many things to share about my experiences in life. im only 20. but i feel that i carry the heaviest problem in the world. there are so many life issues to be solved. i cannot share this to anyone because they might not understand or help me. but by reading your articles, i, somehow, feel uplifted. my concern is, im confused whether to resign from my current work or stay here. this is my FIRST WORK EVER. im a fresh grad so there are many many many things that i completely do not know in working. the first day i started, i was oriented for just an hour! and i thought my work is simple (btw, im an admin asst.) but as days continue to pass, it gets complicated and tougher. i really want to give up and surrender from the first week. im not enjoying my stay here which includes my work and some of the people here. can you help me with this? i hope you could read my concern. please help me. i know this is not a really a problem but for me it really is. you know what, sometimes, i cry just to minimize the burden but the feeling of ease is only for a short time. im working for a month and 4 days, so im still new in everything here. im just hoping you could respond to my “problem”. thank you and please continue writing wonderful articles. God Bless Us! 😀

  185. Very inspiring article… thank you!!!

  186. hayyy buti na lng po available 24 hrs ang blog nyo haha..i really love this article…kht paulit ulit ko po basahin,striking pa din..pati yung Godwhispers nyo po,super nakka bless…thanks for the great articles Bro. Bo..Godbless po!!

  187. nyc one.,ang galing mo tlga bro bo.
    i like this article. i rili learned. =p

  188. nice one…

  189. Thank you brother BO! Alam mo I really need to learn how to stand up for myself. Yesterday, I answered back a person who was really rude to me. I felt that I had to speak up for myself. I told him he was man and he speaks too much. I felt like he was verbally abusing me for no good reason! This was someone from work. Afterwards, I felt good that I stood up for myself, but I wasn’t happy that I had an enemy and I fought with someone. I never really had enemies or fought with someone before and I now realize that the reason I never had them is not just because I was peaceable but because I let others step on my toes without even standing up for myself. I must admit, I don’t feel too confident with having a disagreement with someone especially because I’m new at work and still needs a lot of help, however, I felt that if I just let this person have his own way and make me feel miserable, then it was like sacri=ficing myself again and disrespecting who I am. What do you think about that bro Bo? Now, I just decided that when faced with the person I will act civil so we can just treat each other with respect, I hope he can because it seems like he was taking me on so personally and he already told many people at work about what happened. Considering I am a girl and he a man, he was actually the one who made sumbong to others. As if I was the one who started behaving rudely. I’m actually worried others might believe him without seeing my side first. On the other hand, I do feel that I did what was right on answering him back and standing up for my rights. Please pray for me everyone! Thank you bro bo for your inspiring articles!

  190. it is a must to read.
    u know i hated myself since d day i was dumped by my girlfiend, i just noticed all my flows and not my! i started to love myself and trying to make the most of the situation, the world dosn’t owe us hapiness, kaya kelangan pasayahin natin ang sarili natin by loving ourself.. i feel blessed just by reading this..
    another priceless moment..

  191. i got hit by a lot of things from this article…its like as if i’m the one you are referring made me realized a lot of things…i am planning to make those u’ve shared from your article to use as my guidelines on how to run my life…for right now, im really lost. dont know how to start over again…thank you so much!!! GOD BLESS, MORE POWER AND MORE HELPFUL ARTICLES FROM YOU!

  192. Very inspiring.. I’ll never get tired of reading articles by Bo. I’ll start again by loving myself.

  193. I was struck between neediness and self-love. I contemplated on to where I belong only to find out that I’ve been needy of my husband and came to realize that I was not loving myself. I’m having rough times with my relationship right now but with God’s grace and continued prayer for the deliverance and conversion of my husband, my marriage will be restored. The lesson that I’ve learned is to love myself first and be still and everything will fall into its proper place…Bo thank you for being an instrument of God.

  194. This is what I exactly need.

  195. Thanks for this wonderful message, it is very helpful and inspiring.

  196. I have been to so many relationships…and i always end up being rejected.. I kept on asking myself what is wrong with me… after reading this, i will try doing the first one that is being suggested.. and if that will not yet work, i do not know anymore what to do.. Bo, I want to have a life as wonderful as you have.. I want to establish a good christian family someday… but all the relationships i had were all leading me opposite to my dreams…

  197. bravo u did it again and again bro Bo, your message just comes in time when I feel so emply and needy to say the least.. thanks for putting into words my present state and for giving me hope that I can fill my life with love as you have filled yours. my million thanks brother…

  198. The most recent post prior to my entry was yet last October 2011. I guess, it’s never too late discovering this wonderful article. Often, we can be our worst critic believing that we deserve less of care, attention and love for ourselves. Somehow, that need would come knocking at a certain point in our lives. We can ignore it. Maybe for sometime we have brushed it aside thinking it isn’t as important as attending to other people, but true indeed, it will knock — knock really hard when the need arises. Thank you Lord for reminding us to give self-love. Thank you Bo for being God’s messenger. Blessings be.

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