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Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life?

“Lord, help me to bless people today.”

That’s my daily morning prayer… uh, when I’m happy.

And usually, I am.

But once in awhile, I don’t wake up happy.

And usually, it’s because of a difficult person in my life.

That’s when I pray, “Lord, how can I bless this… this… this… creature?”

I’m a very patient person, so this doesn’t happen too often.

But it happens.

Friend, do you have a difficult person in your life?

And do you sometimes want to pray, “Lord, if you will allow it, let a 50,000 megawatt bolt of lightning strike (Name of Difficult Person) right now. Not to kill him, Lord. Just enough to wake him up and give him second degree burns. Just kidding Lord, but with all due respect, what were you thinking when you created this pathological human being? I don’t want to sound offensive, but were you sleeping on the job when you created this creature? He’s a mess. He’s a composite of all the villains of Spiderman put together….”

Do you sometimes wonder if this difficult person heard God in the middle of the night say, “My child, your ultimate mission in life is to be difficult. That’s the entire purpose of your existence. You shall be the thorn in someone’s flesh. Do everything in your power to annoy him. Be irresponsible. Or be demanding. Or be totally negative. Or be selfish. Or be constantly angry. Or be possessive. Or be always depressed. It doesn’t matter. Your objective is to make his life hell on earth.”

Yes, I must admit that I don’t like a few unlovable characters here and there, but generally, I think the Almighty has done a fantastic job inventing human beings.

I also believe that God allows difficult people to come into our lives to give us very special gifts. What could these gifts be?

I’m going to try something new today. Instead of writing down what these gifts are, I’m going to ask YOU to write them on the comments below. Write your thoughts and experiences and share them to the world. Thousands will be reading them. And in my next email next week, I’ll tell you what I think they are…

Cool?

Thank you!

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

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480 Responses to “Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life?”

  1. yes, I have this supervisor who’s very mean……I mean really really mean…….that all of her staff doesn’t like to see or to talk to her……including me……and that’s the reason i chose to work during nights……so that i don’t have to see her…..but unfortunately i still have to see her in the morning before i leave……so not much of a choice, is there!!!!!!! So everytime i see her i just give her my best smile (plastic!!!!) and i just pray to the Lord ”Lord kayo nang bahala sa kanya……sana i-touch Nyo po ang puso nya” …..ganon lang!!!! Pero sa totoo lang inis na inis at bwisit na bwisit tlaga ako sa kanya….pero nagso-sorry naman ako kay Lord sa nararamdaman ko sa kanya….pero wala talaga akong magawa eh! Ang tindi talaga nong taong yon…..feeling ko ng magsabog ang Diyos ng kabutihan sa mundo eh…..isang botelyang sleeping pills ang ininom nya……hehehe!!!!!

  2. When my dad told me during my 22nd bday that he had an affair with another girl (a flight stewardess), that shook me to my limits. I went to work crying and answered calls with a terrible voice. I kept it to myself since my dad asked me to do so…I kept my promise for so many years because I want my family to be intact. I told myself, that I know he can change and that he has been a good provider to us; not until last year before I turned 27. I think it was last May when someone texted my mom telling her that my dad is “babaero.” When my mom told me about it, I went to my room asking myself if im gonna tell my mom and my younger sister about it. I was so shocked. I thought my dad would end it. But I was terribly wrong. He had an online affair with probably 3 ladies and I am not sure if he was able to meet those girls in person. It broke my heart and spirit. My dad lied to me. He was my idol. I know he is great dad. =( but maybe I was wrong.

    Well anyway, I asked my mom to just ignore the text messages, but she said NO because “I know your dad and I know he’s been doing this for so long now.”
    Yeah, in short my dad is a womanizer. =( But my mom ignored that attitude and remained faithful and loving to my dad. She cooks everyday, takes good care of the house, etc.

    last year, I told my younger sister (25 yrs old) that I know dad had an affair way back when I was still 22 yrs old. She got so mad and cursed me so much. She told me that I lied to her and to my mom. I explained to her that I just want to keep this family intact and I thought dad can change it. She can she can never forgive me and she even texted my dad saying “kahit kelan hindi ako maniniwala sa mga pinagsasabi mo dahil puro ka kasinungalingan.”

    After that incident, my sister never uttered a word to me. I wrote her an email, apologized for so many times and explained my side but I got no reply at all. =( It broke my heart and spirit to the point that I got so freaking mad at her and that I dont really want to see her. Sometimes when I see her, I wanted to cry and hug her so tight and tell her Pls understand. But she’s a tough woman..so strong.

    Because of that incident, I’ve learned to ignore her. But deep in my heart, I just CAN’T. I love her. =( Pls pray for me.

  3. When I ask God for answers He sends one promptly. Thank you Bo!
    I have been ministering to a diificult person for over a month now and everyday I pray to God that He guide me and give me His wisdom so I can be an effective minister to this person. I am in the verge of giving up on him kasi nga saradong sarado ang puso at galit sa mundo…tsk. But through the course of our conversations, I have learned to stretch my patience on him. Sana nga lang lahat ng mga pangaral ko at mga salita ng Diyos na shared ko sa kanya ay tumimo na sa puso niya at magkaroon na siya ng kaliwanagan ng puso at isip. Siguro nga po in God’s time He will be the person God wants him to be.

    Lord, by the wisdom and power of your Holy Spirit, please continue to guide me as I minister to this difficult person. Amen..

    Thank you Jesus. Thank you Bo.

  4. Difficult people give us Gift of Understanding and Courage..

    For me, it takes a broad mind to understand difficult people.. If we can only know their story bat sila nagkakaganon, then we will understand. We will be even thankful for them because through them, we became tough.. esp if they are your superior sa work..

    I had a supervisor before in my first office work. She is so moody, very sensitive (and insensitive) stubborn and very much like of emma’s boss (the comment above =)) My first two weeks sa work, I always cry tlga everytime I go home..

    I was able to stay more than one year from that company when I was assigned to a different supervisor. When I came back to her supervision, naku I decided to call it quits na, she even beg me to stay until Xmas, eh Sept pa lang nun..

    When I resigned, I feel so blessed. I am still thankful I met her, coz she made me stronger in a way.. I learned din na hiwalay pla siya sa asawa so maybe that causes her to be irritable most of the time.. =)

  5. I have had my share of difficult persons in my life. Those type that will use you and take all the credit for all the good things you’ve done and blame you for not so good decisions they make. Those who cannot take responsibility and be accountable for their own actions, like two bosses I had. It’s a good thing that despite of them, I love my job, enjoyed what I do and I have friends in the office that makes my situation a bearable. And I know deep in my heart that despite all of them God is good and He will redeem me from all of them. I just need to constantly pray and asked the grace of God to be patient and be more understanding.

    Right now my life is a little easier because we had a reorganization and I was transferred to a unit where my current boss is very supportive of me. I know this is redemption!! Praise God!

  6. A Difficult person in my life

    Yes unluckily husband k o yun. Just last night nag away kami, i had discovered a text message from a girl, na alam kong babae niya and naka imply na ngkikita sila. I was so depressed that night na prang gusto kong sumabog. He hurted me physically, sumakit nga ang katawan ko. But I just prayed na sana the Lord will change his personality, mainitin kasi ang ulo niya.Since nagkaroon kami ng big problem, dun nagstart ang pagiging mainitin ang ulo niya, naninigaw, nagmumura, but i still accept him coz i love him and also for my 2 kids. But just the other night he abused me physically i cried all night. But pinatwad ko din siya.

  7. I believe that God allows difficult people to come into our lives so we learn how to discern, fight temptation, have an extra challenging job of loving, be more prayerful, learn how to pray for our “enemies”, stretch our virtues of patience, learn the art of saying “no”, letting go and complete surrender.

  8. Patience, definitely. Also, dealing with difficult people helps me to learn how to love more, because it’s easy to love the easy-to-love people, but the difficult people requires extra effort to do so. :)

  9. i believe that God sends difficult people in our lives to give us the special gift of patience, understanding, unconditional love and faith.

    when my bf broke up with me last feb, i was totally devastated.he was my world and we built our dreams together by coming here in singapore. but then he changed his mind without any signal thats somethings wrong and somethings bothering him about our relationship. i felt helpless, worthless and useless. i was not myself for a month and was struggling between work and adjustments. he left me without even caring where ill stay and what ill do. but i never gave up. i turned to God because i still believe He is with me and will never abandon me. it was during that point in my life that everything changed. my heart changed. God grant me the grace to endure every pain and to continue loving inspite of what he did. i have never been patient, understanding, loving, hopeful and faithful in my whole life. he was the most difficult person that came to my life but yet i still love up until now. though i wont be able to show it to him anymore but i believe in my heart that God is also healing him and God will grant my hearts desires in His own perfect time.

    however difficult that person maybe. we should always continue to pray for them because they too are hurting and they need healing. we are lucky because we have faith in God. we should ask God to use us to be instruments of their healing :D God Bless us all!

  10. Yeah….I do have one co- employee here that seldom do open himself to others…not so special child. Before he was close to me, I always praise him with his works bcause he is very good in his profession. There are times that I am the only person who understands his thoughts and personality, but it came to a point that even I got fed up because of his way of delivering hurting words. In short, we are not in good terms as of this moment. I tried to open up, humble myself to create another bridge of communication. We had a team up in a conference in Singapore, I tried again to initiate a conversation but nothing happened, he always wanted to be a loner. Although as a believer and a follower of Christ, I must not surrender….but I need guidance from this, God is Good, Always! He will make a way , the best one!

  11. Hi Bro Bo,

    I’ve experience numerous difficult persons and situations in my life, especially when it comes to family and work. You know what, it’s also a learning experience for me because encountering these difficult beings also opened my eyes to my own weaknesses and strengths. I guess when you personally encounter the Lord, His Love manifests also on you so that it is easier to love the unlovable persons around kasi di na love na nag gagaling sa iyo ang kaya mong maibigay sa kanila pero ang Love, Mercy and Forgiveness na nanggagaling din kay Lord na ibinibigay din niya sa akin and kaya ko ng maibigay sa kanila.

  12. I have a boss; lets name him Papi..
    All i can say he’s hell bad, all he thinks is himself, he’s such a coward and does not know how to manage his people, all he does is this when he’s cornered:

    Sino bang boss mo?

    When he feels his being taken personally and felt disrespected when his staff blows their steam behind his back, he says:

    I don’t even get an apology?

    When he signs or approves over something and then the upper group of managers disregard it he says:

    i told you should have done this?

    He is such a boss who wants everything done for him, he often says I have alot of things to do… when the truth is we often see him browsing the internent and the big YAHOO is on screen…

    he loves to keep on commenting on our works, destructive criticism is his method…

    I showed him friendship but its obvious he pays us back with sh*t…

  13. I’ve had a share of meeting difficult people in life too… a lot of them, for that matter… But each difficult person taught me something and helped me NOT to be a difficult person for others too… I learned to be patient, more understanding, be calm in difficult situations, and be more loving even to the unlovalbes… I learned a lot from those “difficult people” I’ve met… They may be not that “difficult” after all… These people may just bring complexities in our lives, but they are God’s gifts to us so we can learn from them, and stop being “difficult people” as well…

  14. i could say that the difficult person in my life was a man whom i love so much… its been 7 years since i started loving him. I am in a relationship with other guy right now, but then my boyfriend went abroad starting to build our future. After three months of leaving me, the man this man that i consider the difficult person in my life, started to txt me again and kept on asking me for a date.. I can’t refuse to his offer cause i know in myself that i want to go with him. He is the most difficult person in my life, because he is giving me the care that i want, he has been too sweet to me, acting like my boyfriend, but then, he doesn’t want to settle things on both of us.. He doesn’t want a relationship and i don’t know if he truly loves me or if he is just flirting with me.. It’s so hard in my part cause i know that i have been so unfaithful with my boyfriend. I just prayed that this difficult guy in my life leave me and if he really loves me, then who should have commit his self to me… i just pray that everything would be fine.. and i just pray that may the difficult person in my life may realize how much he hurts me…

  15. i have an officemate who keeps on asking me about my salary and i find it difficult dealing with her because for me, that matter is a confidential thing. Also, she’s the type of person who pinpoints my negative traits and sometimes I lose my patience towards her. The last thing I need is a friend who only sees the bad things in me. I remember my mom telling me, if you do not have anything nice to say it’s better to keep your mouth shut.

    i hope God touches her soul, sometimes she rilly pisses me off.

  16. i had this only brother who had been such a difficult person to deal with…hed been to drugs, stealing other peoples properties (us, included), been with bad companies, involved with a fight, impregnated someone..ugh..he had given us such a hell of a life.. hed been into a lot of bad things and perhaps things we dont know of..

    i alwez ask for God’s guidance and prayer to help him change his ways..hopefully,in due time he will come to see and realize what a mess he is..what a nuisance he is..God,i pray that he will come to his right senses and do a huge and radical change of his lifestyle..please help me pray foy my brother…we are 5 in the family and hes the only boy among the siblings.

  17. i have one…i dont know him personally.were just know each other because of multiply.he is an agnostic..so we always have an argument with religion and God…but since ive met him..i also started praying for him..slowly, building a relationship with him and asking God’s guidance…

  18. difficult people makes me become patient and draw me more closer to God. whenever i encountered difficult people i always pray that God will give me patience and understanding and shower me His grace and mercy whenever i give in to temptation to fight back. and i also pray for them that God will have mercy on them give them enlightenment. but sometimes they really sinked in to my nerves that i just want to disappear and wish that i never met them or i’m not part of them. (what makes me angry is when our minds don’t meet and plans keep on changing… it really makes me sad.)

  19. Once, I was had a very difficult person that I worked with. But it turned out to be my “life instructor”, at that depressing moment when I worked with him I learned important basic facts in life;
    1. Little knowledge could be dangerous
    2. You must have a grass root of knowledge and faith
    3. Stand-up and don’t give up
    4. Talk to people especially those working down your line you will learn so many things from them
    5. Be honest
    I applied everything good that I learned from him and I became successful with my carreer. I thanked God for allowing me to worked with him and I believe that in every circumtances He has purpose…be positive and keep an open mind.

  20. For the difficult persons in my life, God has given me the gift of “LOVING UNCONDITIONALLY”. Regardless of the pain and hurts they have caused me, loving them still would mean accumulating great reward points in heaven. Perhaps, after a long time, those points would be enough to exchange for one big suite in heaven.

  21. I do have a difficult person in my lift. Lets name her Cecile. She is my office mate and uses sex and intimidation and tantrums to get her way around the office. Most people working with her find her difficult to work with because she is very unapproachable and would usually not be willing to help if the work would be inconvenient for her. The problem is she is the key person for a sub group of our company. She has only one purpose in our company now, to serve as a very bad example.

  22. God allows difficult people to come into our lives to teach us to be more loving, caring and understanding. They will help us practice to be patient and they can push us to the limit that then will help us realize our great capacity to love and accept them.

    I’ve met different difficult people. Minsan hindi ko na maintindihan why do they need to be like that. if they are happy making other people’s life miserable. Are they aware na nakakasakit sila or nakaka-annoy? I also pity them at times kasi its very hard for a lot of people to understand them. Parang kulang na kulang yung love, understanding and acceptance na nararamdaman nila and it is just so sad.

  23. God allows us to learn how to fend for ourselves when He gives us difficult people in our lives. An older friend once told me that if you have a person in your life who brings out the worst in you, you should stir clear of that person because your relationship cannot be a healthy one.

    I maintain relationships with people who are not high maintenance, and also believe in equality in relationships. I simply will not tolerate a friendship with someone who likes putting me down, to make him/herself feel better.

  24. I am renting an apartment with my fiance’s ex-colleague (girl) and her sister. For one year, we are sharing rent and utilities.
    Last Feb, my BF had to go abroad. Thinking about us (his roommates), he agreed that he will continue sharing with the rent this year so we dont have to worry about his share. Our rent is 12K, so we share 3K each. He will do that until we get another housemate.
    The first day my fiance left, her colleague brought her cousin in the house. At first, she will stay there for 3-4 times a week. Until i noticed that in another month, she was constantly in our home, as in literally living there while my fiance is still paying his share. I was never informed that her cousin will be living there, so I asked. My housemate told me it will be just temporary. Then, come another month, the cousin was still there. She works in a call center agent so she stays in the house in the morning till around 8PM. That contributes to our bill.
    Then, my housemate informed me her cousin wanted to give a share but cannot afford the 3K. So I informed my fiance and he suggested a 60-40 share between them. I told this to my housemate and then she said she will just pay 3K since it may not be fair with my fiance. Then I asked her if that is OK. From then on, I got no reply. That happened a month ago. And until now, we are not in good terms. We live in the same house but we dont talk.

    I see her as a difficult person since I am not really sure if I was unfair to her. Is it wrong if her cousin pays for the rent since she is living in our apt? My fiance, i think was good enough to suggest a 60-40 (cousin’s share is 60) since he practically dont live here.My housemate didnt even respect me to say beforehand that someone else will be living in our apt. It is not about the 3K. My fiance was willing to pay for that. My point is, her cousin was literally living there, should it not be fair if she pays for the share?

    Another thing, they are really messy in the house. They have a room but they stay and sleep in the sala. Their mattresses are there all day all night. Used plates, utensils, glasses stand by the sink. Same with the kawali, saingan, and all. Pati wrappers of biscuits, candies, etc, kung saan saan ngkalat. They hardly clean to think they occupy the first floor. Sa totoo lang, parang room na nga lang un nirerent ko sa apt namin…tapos sila pa un may ganang magalit at mgdabog.

    At first, i was really mad, as in. Gusto ko ngang patulan, gusto ko ding mgdabog. Gusto kong magkalat. eventually, I realized that is not the proper way. After all, anong fulfillment naman ung makukuha ko dun. I just prayed na sana one day, we’ll be OK. I initiated na nga e, i texted her, i told her sana mgkausap kmi para wlang assumptions. I called her also pero pinapatay nya ung fone. I did my part, and i think I am OK on that. Kung ayaw nya, ano pa bang magagawa ko.

    I honestly dont think na may fault ako. Again, it is not about the money, un lng respect and fairness among everyone ung point ko.

    I just live each day. Iwasan hanggat maiiwasan ung mga housemates. Then pray na sana maging OK din.. or at least be civil.

    Natutunan ko… do your part to communicate or at least makapagusap kayo ng difficult person in life. Pero after doing your part and she remains cold, be a prayer warrior n lng. God’s help is needed na talaga :)

    Pardon if it is too long. Tagal ko na kseng tinatago to, thanks for this, i have a venue to blurt it out.

  25. it’s so true!
    He brings “difficult” people into our lives for a PURPOSE. :-)
    i’m a med student and in my school, we are arranged alphabetically. in my particular grp, i have a lot of “difficult” people for different reasons.
    some of them are stubborn, some do as minimal a work as they can (which leaves patients poorly under-managed), some don’t show up for duties & so you end up shouldering their work, some can’t do anything on their own & ask you for everything (to the point of dropping their responsibility on your lap)!
    and i am STUCK with them till the end of internship (around two years from now).

    my other classmates (when assigned to work with them) complain about their laziness & marvel at how I manage.
    but little do they know, that it WAS a struggle for me (until now) NOT to lose my patience & to see beyond my group’s bad habits into their reasons behind their lack of motivation.
    i “handle” each member of my group as “Christian-like” as I can - adhering to my own principles & setting the limits but being as understanding & patient & humble as gritted teeth & hastily-whispered prayers would allow. (All this done most times in anger & frustration)

    And although for most part of this year, I kept complaining to my friends why God allowed such people (and the worst kinds of people) to be in my group, I wasn’t complaining at the end of the year (oddly enough).
    I’m actually looking forward to working with them next year. I know they haven’t turned around completely but they’ve seen me work with them, seen how much I care about them - not just because my grades also depend on their performance - but because I care about our work & about our patients.
    Once in a while, I even take time to talk to them, friend to friend.

    I think I couldn’t have done this without constant prayers for Grace and Wisdom and Discernment. :-)

    As I read in one prayer before, “Keep praying about difficult people in your life. They may not change, but YOU will..”

    :-) God bless, Bro Bo and to other readers!

  26. From the time I’ve discovered how corrupt, demanding & domineering my boss is, I’ve decided that I want a new job. I can say I’m a good follower, but if I know that my leader is heading the wrong direction, I am no longer motivated. I have to admit I became stubborn and hot-headed with my co-employees for the reason that I’m angry with what my boss is doing. Even if I love my work, it’s hard for me to wake up every morning knowing that I will face that person. I’ve always asked God to help me love the unlovables. Everytime I pray that, only one person is in my head, that is, who else, but him. I’ve applied for several companies before just to escape from his control but sad to say, all had been negative applications. But in time, I’ve learned not to be affected by that difficult person. I just let God do His ways in him. I cannot change him, but I can change myself. Now, I only have a week here and I’ll be transferring in a new work. =) It feels good that I’m leaving this company not to run away from him. I believe God used my boss so I can be a better person.

  27. Dear Bro Bo:

    Christ’s Peace!

    As what they say, ” you can’t please everybody” no matter how you humble you are. We can’t forced them to like us or even ourselves to them…but God is so great! For He is always there to make everything possible. I believe that no matter how hypocrite a person is, still he has that positive traits, maybe we just need to give him chance in some situation. I have experience so many times different dificult people in my life, but still I never considered them as a totally bad person, instead I lift up them to God to touch thier hearts and clear thier minds that in His due time these people will realize that they’re not in right track of life what God wants us to go. I just keep on praying that God will give me more patience and more strengths to understand these kind people instead of fighting them back or running from them, I can bring them closer to God….that’s my goal every day of my life.

    More power and God bless you!

    Vic-Vic

  28. i had an officemate, who said that she’s a die hard catholic before, went to mass everyday, goes to worship..but when she was invited to some sort of a gathering..everyhing changed… all her beliefs changed! the worst thing she said is that we’re “brainwashed by the Catholic church”, we’re fundamentalists! (i don’t even know what this means). every teachings & doctrines are not true! we had long debates everytime religion was brought up, but i ended up talking to a box that had been buried and cemented under a road for a million years! one of the debates we had was..the “tongues of fire by the Holy Spirit”, she was quote & quote… “these sort of language is a demonic language that was used by babylonians in the early days..” Catholics just used it because they wanted to feel special & superior to other religions..”

    how will you deal with a person like that??? now you tell me Bo.

    thanks for the reply & God Bless.

  29. Sadly, the difficult person in my life is my ex husband. He was physically & verbally abusive. He called me names and made me look bad among his relatives and friends. Now that I filed for annulment, he is insisting on visitation rights on our child whom he failed to see for over a year and has not given any kind of support when he has the means to do so. I exhausted all efforts of saving our marriage and keeping the family intact, but he didn’t want to cooperate that’s why I ended up filing for legal action. I think this should be the last recourse for handling a difficult person. I do pray for him that someday he will realize his obligations as a husband and father.

  30. For me, the difficult person in my life is my mom. And not surprisingly, if you asked her who her difficult person is- it’ll probably be me.

    I often wondered why God gave me to her when our personalities are radically different. When I was younger, I often get depressed because I do not understand why she couldn’t understand me. (Now, I’m wiser.) I find it hard to feel anything for her- even now.

    And I’m guessing that it must be the result of how I was treated when I was younger. If I could not reach her expectations; I got a verbal lashing. Not only that, I was molested as well. (I look like my father; who died when I was 3.)

    I always prayed that I’d get over these experiences one day. That maybe one day, I won’t cringe when she innocently touches me. Or find it in my heart to forgive, forget, and simply love.

    Now that she’s getting older, she expects me to support her financially and emotionally in her old age. To be honest, AYOKO. I feel trapped. My inner initial reaction was, “You abused me and you expect me to take care of you?” She’d quote bible passages to me on children’s responsibilities to aging parents… It’s driving me CRAZY.

    And she’ll complain about me to her friends in her church group. What can I do? Outside of our house, she’s considered a saint. I couldn’t complain to anyone; because everyone I know- knew her. *sigh*

    I am still desperately praying. I hope others would pray for me too.

  31. wow, it really made me smile when i read this…. for so long now, i am so disappointed with my subordinate. coz instead of saying she cannot do her job, she simply says the 1,000 reasons why she didnt submit things on the deadline i told her… hay naku, patawarin ako ng Diyos.. pero talagang she really pissed me… i really dont like to see her nor give her assignments, talagang im already thinking na di na naman nya magawa ang ipapagawa ko sa kanya. And she is not focusing sa trabaho nya.. basta she there lng…… yun lng… basta present xa….

    anyway, bo thank you kasi in a way na voice ko na yung gusto ko.
    God bless you.

  32. sometimes i consider my in laws the difficult persons GOD sent me … hehehe … imagine a mother inlaw telling you might be pregnant knowing her son is out of the country????

    how about a sister in law who had told you everything you own should me thiers e am working naman ????

    another sister in law asking evrything about my parents, my brothers, my sisters ,,,, ayyy naku …. bro bo … if only i could turn back time i never got married na lang ….

    may GOD bless and guide me always …

  33. one of the difficult persons in my life was a classmate during freshman year in college.

    we heard feedbacks from our other blockmates that he usually just slacks of during group work and the usual freeloader stuff lazy people do.

    but because he’s ok, we sometimes hang out with him. for two terms (i study in a trimestral system university), we didn’t get the chance to be groupmates but come third term, his true colors were seen.

    it may partially be my fault that i elected him as the leader of our group for i believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt.

    so there, he was our leader. he didn’t slack off, on a positive note. but he didn’t do his work either. he passed it on to us and bombarded us with text messages telling us to buy this and that, yada yada yada..

    thank God it’s all over.

    i learned from that experience to always keep my cool but nevertheless make a stand or even argue when the situation calls for it.

  34. When I joined YFC in college, I was asked what gift from the Holy Spirit I wanted to receive. I thought about picking the gift of tongues (speaking in, not additional ones). Not only is it showy and impressive, it might come in handy for my french and spanish classes.

    In the end I asked for wisdom. I made a horrible choice. Every time Im angry with someone, my mind explores reasons (excuses even) for their behavior. They had a crappy day, they were also subjected to the same abuse, or they just don’t know better. It takes away the edge off the anger. And I’m also reminded how my thoughtless actions may have triggered their reactions/behavior. It is a totally humbling gift… realizing that you are human. As these “mini monsters” are, no matter how aggravating they appear to be.

    You can’t always do something to change someone. In the end you can only change yourself. So you either accept them or you can distance yourself from them.

  35. Hi again!
    Wow Bo, these comments does not only make me smile & laugh, but I sympathize as well. It only shows that each one of us really have atleast one difficult person in our lives.
    I can’t wait for your next email.
    God speed!

  36. This article reminded me of a classmate i had back in my first year of college.

    At first, when you meet him, i can say that he’s practically a good okay person. However, as time goes by, me and my other classmates realized that he was somewhat of a free rider - nobody wants him included in group works because he never tries to contribute anything. The worst part of it is, he passes most of his subjects because groupworks pull his entire grade.

    Of course, being his classmate, for us it’s totally unfair for him to do this. but we can’t do anything about it especially when the final grades are already issued. So it went on for about a semester or two. It was not later on that we realized that he was actually undergoing such a difficult time.

    Around middle of our 3rd semester, he, out of nowhere, opened up to some of us. He told us of the difficult things he’s been undergoing since highschool (even before he entered college). Unfortunately, he got his girlfriend pregnant during highschool and ever since then, he was struggling to balance everything - from his studies to his family life. He told us that when he graduated highschool, he even thought of not going to college anymore, and instead, find a job to support his family. Good thing his father convinced him that he’s making a big mistake for thinking that way and that he should graduate college first. That’s why he ended up in going to college. He told us that his father is the one taking care of his tuition fee, while his siblings supports his family’s expenses.

    Actually, looking at his status, he’s really blessed right? He’s still very lucky for having the chance of getting a better life. Who knows what would’ve happen if he hadn’t taken his father’s advice. It would’ve been even worse! Unfortunately, we just don’t know if he sees all this blessings he’s got. I mean, his ways even got worst during the whole semester. He came from just being late to classes to not going to classes anymore; From not just contributing anything during groupworks to telling other people that his group doesn’t want him to help anyway; From doing assignments to not doing anything; and lastly, for expecting other people to cover for him especially when a professor asks the class about him.

    Being his classmate, we would have this talk with him sometimes that he should do better because if he continues doing such acts, nothing will happen with his life. Then we would go and tell him: “Think about your kids. If you’re going to mess up your life, make sure they aren’t included! They don’t have anything to do with this and yet they are close to experiencing suffering. And maybe you should think about your wife as well. There’s still time you know, you could do better.” I know it’s not that good that we meddle with his affairs like this but we can’t also just stand there and continue being witnesses to the mistakes he’s unaware of commiting. We know he could do better with his life. And it’s hard seeing people we know that makes his life more difficult every minute.

    Yeah, i do sometimes ask God to wake him up; shake him a little bit so that he’ll be able to do better.

  37. Yes, I believe God allows difficult people to come into my life to give me very special gifts…

    Understanding. I realize that often, the problem is not interpersonal relationships (difficult people vs. me) but INTRApersonal ones (difficult people vs. their own selves, their baggages, unresolved issues, etc.). Those difficult people have emotional concerns deep in themselves, which I need to unearth and understand more.

    Tactfulness. I don’t know why but difficult people seem to have a tendency to misconstrue my words. When misunderstandings happen, all the more i realize that the opportunity to speak does not guarantee me the privilege of being understood. The Spirit teaches me to bridle my tongue and to be more careful with my speech.

    Growth and Maturity. Difficult people seem to be experts in the field of upsetting happy people. Their comments definitely bite, but they make me look at myself and say, “Oh, now i see. There is some truth in what Mr. Difficult is saying.” Honestly, that provides me an opportunity to improve on the areas I need to grow in. True, feedback is painful. So is truth. But I believe we Christians can never come to full bloom without them.

  38. one more special gift i think and the most of all is LOVE.
    we couldn’t understand difficult people without the Love of Jesus in our hearts.
    i too had been difficult to others especially my family in one way or another but unconditional love moved me to change and their prayers to God changed me and still changing me to be a better person.
    without their love for me maybe i still remain a depressed person and so difficult to understand but they loved and accepted me for this and it healed me. that is what i’m trying to do whenever i met someone so difficult to deal with i just pass it forward the grace and love i received from God which is LOVE that makes this world go round and peaceful.
    May we all be filled with God’s love. Thanks! :-)

  39. lumaki akong abused na bata.. dahil unting pagkakamali ko lang binubugbog ako ng kapatid kong lalaki.. kung meron nga lang bantay bata nung panahon na yun.. baka napabantay bata ko na sya.. sobrang laki ng naging trauma sa akin.. noong bata ako natatakot na akong umuwi sa bahay namin dahil alam kong magugulpi na naman ako.. yun ang dahilan din siguro ng maaga kong pagaasawa.. upang malayo sa kanya.. pero ngayun medyo ok na kami.. indi ko na lang sya pinupuntahan sa bahay nya uipang maiwasan din ang problema… indi ko pa idn talaga alam sa sarili ko kung talagang napatawa ko na sya.. pero gustong gusto ko na din syang mapatawad sa lahat lahat ng ginawa nya sa akin.. ayaw ko ding may dalahin sa dibdib ko.. medyo mabigat din kasi sa pakiramdam… sana nga marinig ni Lord ang mga panalangin natin na ang mga taong ito ay magbago na…

  40. Dear Bro. Bo,
    I also encounter “difficult People” in my life . Most of the time I fail because I get angry or agitated. So I asked for the Help from God to make me more patient and understanding. I come to realized that this can make you too a better person, because you are put to into test.
    God never does anything that is bad for us. I think this will make us more understanding and forgiving later.
    More power to you. I am thanking God for people like you and Father Zaki of Dubai who help us always.
    May god be Praised!

    marivic

  41. just read this article and it brought to my mind this member of mine that quite a struggle for sometime already.

    i have this member in the community that at times i can’t figure out how to deal with her. she really has this “pasaway” attitude that pushes me to my limit of patience. i don’t know if she’s in the community because of the activities and the happenings, as in she’s present and super active for those kind of things. but if its already for service, you can’t count on her… she’s suddenly out of the picture.

    i’ve prayed to God to give me the answer on how i can handle her. i can’t simply ignore her coz she’s my responsibility to God. i realized too that this is the challenge for me as a leader, on how i can be more effective and strong.

    suddenly i started praying for her and for the other members as well that have been “lie-low” in the community which i haven’t done before. i know nothing is impossible with God and i hope on our meeting this friday, she’ll be able to come.

  42. Hi Bro bo,
    Yes i havedifficult person in my life.They happened to be my Uncle(like devil in progress) and a cousin nobody wanted naparang a creature only a mother could love.This uncle of mine is sooh selfish,likes gossips,liar,corrupt,likes elevatimg himselfto the status of a hero pero and galingnyang mang api ng kapwa nya na parang wala ng pakiramdam ang tao nasa2ktan nya no matter what.He wanted us to leave the house His brother owns (btw, he’s a cousin of my mom) kasi his brotherpassed away na pero ayaw nya ibugay ung pagmanage ngbahay sa sisterin law nya bcoz.He wanted the house for himself.And ever since naman wala syang naging part sa bahay na yon.It’s a goodthing we left the house na .We suffered so much from that house kahit dun na kami lumaki.Life is too short and its no use dealing with difficult people syang oras.kunggusto nyanyang ganon ang buhay nya so be it.Mahirap kausap kahat ng tao umiiwas na sa kanya.I never(10000) really thought na may nilalang na katulad nya.And when I pray for this person my stomach getsupset all the time that makes me stop trying.So Bro Bo pinaubaya ko nalang sa Diyos Sya That’s between him and His God.And My cousin just the same a pain in the neck.no matter how i prayed for her and showed her kindness, just the same she’s a pathological liar.Even if she hurts me,she’s still hurting herself more.Ganun din nakakapagod silang ipagdasa kaya iniwasan ko nlng magcross ang path namin.I mean i’m not alone with what i feel for this person.Maybe in God’s own time they’ll change.Umiwas nalang ako kesa magkasakit ako sa puso sa ka3usap sa sa kanila diba? well what do you say to it
    marilou

  43. Good pm to you BO,
    I consider one of our member really different or difficult, Her pride is more higher than her, considering her height is just like me 4′11. We are together in one community here in Saudi for almost 16- 17 years, but until now we don’t know how to deal with her, gusto nya i praise siya, siya unang sasabihan, pag hindi, na gagalit siya,, pag ayaw nyang umattend ng gawain ok lang pero pag iba ang hindi naka attend kung ano anong masakit na salita ang sinasabi nya.. lately di na siya na sama sa amin, one time nga nag invite ang leader namin, bakit di raw sinabi sa kanya agad, nag tampo na naman. Pag nainis siya di siya na attend,, nakakahiya na ke LORD until now ganun parin ugali nya.. hindi na nag bago…. Tumatahimik na lang kami at patuloy na lang namin siyang pinag pray na sana ilagay niya sa isip niya na ang pag silbi ke LORD ay hindi para sa sarili kundi para sa mga taong naka paligid at ang papuri ay sa DIYOS at di sa tao. We considered her our torn, for the group to learn how to love her more.

    Please include our group and also my kids to your prayers
    I have problem with my sons they don’t know how to budget money…. they still asked for my support even though they are family men,,, I think GOD is giving me trials so that understanding and LOVE will continue to grow within me,,, GOD BLESS

  44. I met a difficult person in the workplace. I don’t normally assign negative attributes to a person but this person has always undermined my work and actions in the workplace. To make sure I wasn’t just imagining things or being overly sensitive, I started asking my trusted colleagues and who knew her better if they noticed her actions (or reactions) towards me and I received a resounding “yes” she was quite hard on you. They also don’t understand where she was coming from.

    I thought her reactions are unreasonable and illogical. I was so frustrated and got depressed that even when I was 7 months pregnant, I was crying myself to sleep thinking of all her actions towards me or my work.

    I really hated her at that time…but at the same time, I was also hoping that I was wrong. That is why I kept on trying to bridge my relationship with her. Unfortunately, there was not relationship to build. She was fixed at the thought that she will not accept me and like me. And now, I have nothing but pity for her and hope that she will gain her peace of mind. Because I think, whatever negative things she was trying to throw at me was an indication of a personal struggle inside.

    I am still hoping we will patch things up. I always pray that the Lord will give me the strength to accept her (or any other difficult person) and also to accept myself because maybe, I am also difficult to other people.

  45. Difficult people give us gifts of patience, endurance, and perseverance. With the presence of difficult people, we learn to be more patient, enduring, and persevering. We develop the patience of the saint with the grace of the Holy Spirit; we learn to endure when the most natural thing to do is to seek revenge; and we develop perseverance in our faith.

  46. I have experienced and still do the worst with this very dificult person. I just don’t know why he hates me like hell. This is what I feel ever since I joined the organization. It seems I’m not capable of doing anything good in his book, which I definitely refuse to believe. Many times I have thought of just getting out of our group and transfer to another or just leave the company and be spared from him and his all-too difficult personality. In the morning when I wake up, I really feel bad that I am going again in an office I dread not to set foot. It has been an ordeal really. How I wish I can get out in one snap of a finger. In the past during bad times with him, I usually try to get an inspirational book to assuage my feelings. It helped but now I guess I’m not capable of feeling all the right emotions. I can only hope and pray that I will be able to bear all this some more and finally realize that there’s light at the end of the tunnel.

  47. Grabe! Ang tagal kong nakarating dito sa bottom… Sadya

    yatang walang tao na walang difficult person sa buhay nila…

    Nakakalungkot ang sa akin kasi kasama ko sa bahay halos

    24 hrs. a day. Ang negosyo kasi namin ay sa bahay lang ang

    mga transactions. Katabi ko pa sa pagtulog! Siya na yata

    ang pinaka difficult na tao sa mundo, and mind you, 20 yrs

    pa lang naman kaming nagsasama… Alam nyo na siguro

    kung sino ang tinutukoy ko? He’s no other than my

    husband!

    Alam nyo, kung sasabihin ko pa kung gaano siya ka-

    difficult mauubos ko ang space ni brod Bo para sa iba. And

    mind you, hindi lang siya difficult person sa buhay ko,pati sa

    nanay at kapatid niya! At kung tatanungin niyo pa ang mga

    anak ko , tiyak iisa ang sagot nila, papa is the most difficult

    person in their lives. Imagine the role i’m undertaking…

    Pero, ba’t ako nakatiis ng 20 yrs.? Siguro nga… mahal ko

    siya! Sa nanay ko pa, katangahan na!

    Kapag naman may kaaway siya,unang-una akong in his

    defense kaagad. Naawa nga ako kapag inaaway siya eh.

    Madalas tuloy, naitatanong ko sa Kanya, ba’t hindi Niya pa

    baguhin kaagad ang asawa ko? Ba’t hinihintay pa Niya na

    maraming magalit sa kanya? Lalo lang tuloy siyang

    napapasama…

    Ang iniisip ko nalang at this point in my life,siguro ito ang

    misyon ko sa mundong ibabaw,to tame the most difficult

    creature God has made. May magandang kapalit siguro ito

    sa Itaas. Pagbubutihan ko nalang siguro ang misyon na

    ito. Malay niyo maging santa pa ako!

  48. my 2-cents sharing ~ ~ ~

    Difficult people are given us and allowed to cross our path, short-timed or long term. The reason, I truly believe, is for us to taste, to experience, and ultimately to enjoy God’s grace. And the grace is — feeling, being really and truly a child of God.

    We’ve been more of self-centered rather than other-focused, for one reason or another. We also have different definition of happiness, success, even being “followers” of the Christ.

    However, if we truly want to be “followers” of Jesus, then we need to make that DECISION - to really follow and imitate; afterwards, active follow through. Here we need to:
    : look for and see Jesus in the other person (beyond all the surface “dirt” and “unlovableness”)
    : help that person bring out from within him the “Jesus spirit” in him.

    I believe that once we make that resolve, and honest about it; and pure in our intentions, and pray from the heart for it - - - then, I believe God would give us:
    : many opportunities - to the degree conforming to our uniqueness - to enable us to practice and live out that decision of ours (here is when we encounter more and more difficult persons)
    : discernment and knowledge - when and how to act, speak, think, etc. ; knowing that the other person’s weakness “happens to be” tailor-fit to my God-given talents and skills
    : a share, to a very small degree, of God’s compassion, emphaty, etc. by understanding that the other person is - just like me - a child of God.

    And of course, in this journey of becoming, we acquire Godly characteristics - learn how to listen and not just hear, how to see beyond the surface, learn that giving respect has nothing to do with whether the other person deserve it or not, patience, perseverance, true acceptance of the other for who he is at that time.

    God bless us all.

  49. while reading the comments, I realized that those difficult persons I have in my life are also present with others:
    a very “bossy” boss who wouldn’t listen to my inputs and totally edits my report to suit his ideas
    a jobless brother, a separated sister, impregnated sister who all depend on me financially
    a staff who refuses to obey my rules
    my mother who sometimes I think love more my siblings than me
    my father who is a womanizer
    a costumer infront of me in a long queue in the supermarket who I think is a relative of kuya cesar bcause he is too slow
    and so on and so forth
    but then while reading the comments, parang tinatamaan ako
    bat parang ako yata iyong difficult person
    difficult staff to my boss because I thought I was so smart and my boss so dumb I dont want to give in to his criticisms
    a selfish sister who got a better education and work and refuses to help my siblings
    or I maybe the selfish daughter who wants all the affection to be mine
    or I maybe the dictator boss who doesn’t give my subordinates the room to grow
    I had my share of difficult persons but somehow I realized I’m also tv difficult one.
    and I can’t wait for bro. Bo’s next article to find out what can I do about it.

  50. hmm.kanina lang napatambling ako sa isang tao na pag nagsalita o gumalaw,mapapaspell D-i-f-f-i-c-u-l-t ka talaga.naisip ko nga po tatay bo yung mga natutunan ko sa inyo,’don’t complain.’ ‘enjoy life.’ hay. andaling sabihin pero pag may mga difficult people na sa buhay ko, parang nagiging question mark ang lahat.habang binabasa ko nga yung mga ibang comments,di ko mapigilang isaisahin ang mga hanep na mga taong yun.narealized ko, in one way or another, those people pushed me to get closer to the Lord. i remember those moments that i was deeply hurt by my pamangkin, i said to the Lord, “hanep Ka Lord, kung ganito na yung sakit na nararamdaman ko, paano pa yung pinagdaanan Mo para samen?” thoughts like that made me fall in love more with the Lord not to mention my prayer life that is being strengthen during those difficult moments with difficult people. and another thing, does God really allows difficult people to come into our lives or is it the other way around? kapag kasi nagiging difficult people na ko para sa ibang tao, nagpapadala si Lord ng mga tao para marealized ko ang pagkakamali at worth ko. and little by little, i’ll be less difficult until the time comes that i will be a blessing-a lil’ bit difficult person already.

  51. I am past 50 yrs old and come to think of it, in every stage of my life - as student, single person working, married life, a mother, semi-retired employee etc… I met many difficult persons which molded my personality to what I am now. I have become prayerful and sensitive to the feelings of others. I found friends who tell me I am a good listener and a shoulder to cry on. But these are just part of the blessings in disguise which I come to realize only recently. I have been physically abused (bullied) when I was a student, ridiculed beccause I am not pretty, cheated by my boyfriend/eventually husband, swindled by close relatives and friends. My only constant companion is my diary where I write my hurts and prayers. I am a survivor, praise God. There are still difficult persons around me but now I am bolder and more confident - I’ve learned to say no, to assert my rights and express my feelings - even righteous anger and disgust.. Thanks Bro Bo for nourishing our souls everyday!

  52. i am now currently dealing with VERY difficult person… the fact that i am an impatient creature my self and that i personally have to deal with my own idiosyncrasies, i once asked God why sent such a crap…? then i realized that maybe God was just trying to strengthen my weak patience…haha albeit many time sGod failed doing so for i still tend to make a patol…

    this difficult person makes my life a little miserable yet at the same time taught me how to be a patient ate for she is younger than my age… :)

  53. Well, what the horrible people does to me is they help me appreciate the few nice people I come across with. It’s like it’s so typical to assume that people just won’t care and will think only of theirselves. Then you meet a person who will care for you just unconditionally. If everybody is nice, it would be difficult to notice the smiles, the nice gestures, a stranger’s kindness, friends who were once strangers, etc.

    Through those horrible people we are honed and purified. Sometimes, when I come across those people I do ask myself, “Why me!” Why can’t those horrible people leave me alone. I suppose those people are being used as part of our purification. If everybody in this world is nice, how can we be tested? Because of them, we pray to God, we asked for his help.

    It can also be that we encounter those people because God is sending us to be a blessing to them.

    I would write my horrible experience about the horrible people I met but well, who would want to hear me moan :P

    Take Care.

  54. difficult person??? so many….but recently, i encountered this personality through my employer here in canada….yes, she is difficult, but within that more than two months of living with them, i haven’t experienced that kind of difficulty, with her family, yes, i heard and seen them arguing, yelling, and until one time, her son told me that I will be next. And that’s the hardest part, when I encountered the turmoil, I never felt so humiliated in my entire life. I never felt so upset and miserable during the times that I have been with them. Good thing, the LOJ Chapter Head Couples here in Calgary adopted me for almost two weeks. And just yesterday, my employer called up to ask me what’s my decision but I bounced back her question, I asked her what’s her decision. She finally told me that she knows I’m not happy anymore and will still get me for a while until I found another job but I have to inform her when, so she can prepare for my loss.
    By the way, she is a Christian, I don’t know what kind, but as I was idle for more than I week, our separation made me realize so many things. That I have to bear with her type of personality, that no one has undergone a situation in life that is not difficult. That her yelling should be written on the sand compared to the good things she did for me which I cherish during the times that we are still good.
    And as I grow as a Catholic Christian, I must continue learning and have the wisdom and virtues to face reality, how to deal with such types and how to tame my tongue and practice so much patience. Thanks be to God for all the courage and strength to face the world as it is and for all the teachings of Bro Bo to continuously nourish our souls. Glory to God in the highest. Everything works for good for those who love Him.

  55. hi bro. bo! oh so many difficult people in my life, even close family and friends.

    anyway, i think that the best gift that i am able to receive the Lord is that i am able to let go of whatever ill feelings i have over this person through much prayers. and sometimes, it would be hard because it keeps of coming back over and over again. yet, truly the love of God is made perfect in us (1 John 4) and i realize that i do not have to do anything in this person. it is only God who can change them and i finally made a choice to dwell in God’s love for me rather than eating myself up in anger and bitterness and all those nasty feelings.

    yes, truly loving our neighbor is hard. yet, His love for us is greater that’s why we need to pray so that we can let go and let God.

    GOD bless… i was so inspired by your talk last night here in So Cal.

    thank you!

  56. To answer Bo’s question… the gifts that we can receive in dealing with difficult person are patience, understanding, and love.

    After reading all the sharings, I can say that the very root cause of why there is a difficult person in this world is because of “lack of love”. And to deal with them is to give them love.
    How do we handle them in a practical way?

    1st step - Let them know in a humble way that they are difficult to be with. How? It really depends on the person. But It doesn’t matter the approach as long as one should do it in a humble way.
    2nd step - Inscribe in your mind and heart that they need help. Period. And when God’s open a way, do whatever you can to help them.
    3rd step - Pray. Need not to explain.

    Now, do this steps to yourself first and then to the person that you have difficulty dealing with.

    God bless us all!

  57. I would say the most difficult person in my life is my mom. She’s a tough woman, who came from a poor family and had a bitter past. It’s not easy to please her and she is always worried about tomorrow especially in financial matters. I always try to tell her that money is not the source of happiness but still she always talks about it. She always complains, not contented and doesn’t want to share her blessing to others except to those whom she likes. I guess the reason why she is like this is because she’s afraid to be empty handed once again. I am still grateful that she is my mom because without her we would ended up nowhere. She also has good side but sometimes it is hidden underneath her soul that you really need to dig in. She is not a typical mom who is gentle and caring but she has her own way to support and nurture us. Our grandparents basically raised us up, both our parents are working then, so they provided us the care and affection that my mom can’t express. On the other hand my dad is a gentle person but doesn’t speak a lot. Most of the time my mom nagged him.
    Before, I really hate seeing my mom being difficult that I fight with her most of the time. But later on I realized I’m becoming a difficult person also for my mom. I shifted my paradigm, looked at her positive attributes and tried to understand the root cause of everything. THen, something change, she mellow down a bit and we are not fighting that often. If things got worst I just tell myself that I cannot change others but I can change and control myself. After that shift, my mom is a little bit shaken and I am not stressed at all. Though sometimes she is still being the difficult person that I know, I just pray and believe that she will change one day. But no matter how difficult she is I still love her with all my heart.

  58. Hi Bro Bo!

    Well, i have had so many difficult persons in my life but this one really stand out from the rest. She is my boss and everyday I pray that God will give me strength to face her and not only that I always said to HIM “Lord what will your suprise be for me today”. Its like everyday she calls me to her room as in I say all my prayers. She has this capacity to make people down as if you have to think twice before you speak to her, my confidence run out almost.

    But, you know, I just always keep in mind that maybe she has some problems somewhere. All colleagues told me that she’s like the character in the movie “The Devil wears Prada” something like that.

    When i watched the “Evan Almighty movie” in the one of the scene their hit me when He said “When you ask God for patience does He give it to you right away, No! He gives you something or someone to practice your patience”

    And I am learning something from her and at the sametime I know that deep within her something good it just she doesn’t want to show it…..

    And I thanked God everyday for giving me this difficult person.

    Thanks Bro Bo! God Bless

  59. difficult person?.. siguro ako na yon.. maraming beses ko na kasi sinubukan na magpatawad sa mga taong sabihin na natin na in a way nakasakit sa aking damdamin..sabi ko ..these time kakalimutan ko na ang lahat ..ung tipong ” ha?.. atraso?..wala naman akong matandaan na may ginawa ka sa akin..” alam kong mahirap pero hindi ako mawawalan ng pag-asa na darating ang panahon na magiging buo na ulit ang puso at pagkatao ko dahil natuto na akong lumimot at magpatawad, At pasasalamatan ko sila dahil sa aral na aking natutunan… with GOD nothing is impossible

  60. “Hurt people hurt people”… this is just one of the things i take into consideration when trying to deal with difficult people. Sometimes, this statement cools all the boiling inside me, but at times the exasperation goes on no matter how i hastily pray for grace and humility.

    I’m a also a medical student like paui, who has posted a comment yesterday and while reading her entry, it was as if i was the one she was referring to in the scenario. I’m afraid I have also had a bunch of classmates and groupmates who are “difficult”, in every sense of the word.

    My first year in medical school was a big toll of adjustment, not just with the course but most especially with the group i belonged to. It felt like a survival of the fittest that I wasn’t really prepared for. Time and again i have run to the heavens in tears that God would touch these people to take responsibility in all our requirements. Well, I could always deal with certain difficult people, but being surmounted with a dozen?? unimaginable! It had been a really difficult year for me, thus my rejoices when I finally “survived” the whole year of our togetherness.

    Come second year, I felt so redeemed because somehow, the groupings have changed. Difficult people came along the way, but by God’s grace I didn’t find much problem dealing with them.

    On my third year, this school year, with only two sections remaining, I was totally aghast upon learning that my groupmates way back in first year would soon-to-be my future groupmates for the next two years. My first instinct was to request that my section be changed. It had been 2 days since I requested for that change, 2 days of intense prayer.

    On this day, I shall face the truth. No matter what the result is, I pray that God envelope me with His grace. I’m afraid of the possibility that I’d be spending two more years with them but the thought that God has a beautiful purpose and a plan for me, makes me feel that I am safe in Him.

    I just offer everything to God now… And I continue to pray for all the difficult people in my life. May I not be a difficult person in theirs.

    Thank you for this article..and the chance for me to post my own share of story..It is very timely for me..
    Godspeed.

  61. I have a tita who was very mean. For her money matters. I used to study a tougher field when she told me not to stick with it if my head can handle it. She called me and my family names because her sister (my mom’s sister too) had been helping us get through since i was small. I decided not to ask anything from anyone of them anymore and take charge of my life. I took a leave from school and am now working.

    I also have a coworker who does not miss a day without complaining about anything - the boss, the clients, the schedule…everything.

  62. i have read from a book written by St. Poveda that:

    the cross (difficult person) in your life is your key to heaven.

    Christlike love is patient with the faults of others!

    Good day…

  63. difficult people makes us more patient and understanding…

  64. Yes, I have a very difficult person in my life right now. My boss, he is making my life hell on earth. He is moody, insensitive and demanding in a very weird way. I almost want to go up to him and ask him what have I done to him to deserve this. I know he is not happy with my work but the action he is showing verges on sarcasm and insult. I am almost on the verge of resigning even with no clear new job on sight. Maybe its a sign that I should strike on my own, I used to do consulting and I used to have a small business - the consulting was ok but the small business hmm its another story. But I was thinking I should have learned something from my mistake, now its time to take a second crack at things I really would like to do. I am now asking God to Bless my plans and decision. And also to give me a forgiving and humble heart and wisdom too and good health. By the way as I was about to submit the boss just came in. To all reading these I ask of you to please pray for me and for him as well.

  65. It is really so difficult to live in this world…full of people that can annoy you in one way or another…But it is also wonderful to think that there is GOD who always give us inspiration and guidance to cope up with this kind of people…i do encounter a lot of difficult people in my work place…but come to think of it I am also a difficult person for some…but i would like to thank GOD for giving me a heart and mind that is capable of knowing and accepting that there are so many wayas on how I can deal with these people…

    Thank you LORD for giving me that heart…

  66. It is really so difficult to live in this world…full of people that can annoy you in one way or another…But it is also wonderful to think that there is GOD who always give us inspiration and guidance to cope up with this kind of people…i do encounter a lot of difficult people in my work place…but come to think of it I am also a difficult person for some…but i would like to thank GOD for giving me a heart and mind that is capable of knowing and accepting that there are so many ways on how I can deal with these people…

    Thank you LORD for giving me that heart…

  67. yes i meet them all the time…di ko alam kung gasgas or sounding like saint..sa dami na cguro ng books na nabasa ko, at mga articles ng tulad ke Bo…pumapasok lagi sa isip ko na…what if yung taong kinaiinisan ko or ng lahat eh me traits din pala akong ganon?…tapos naiisip ko na “hello, anak din ni God yan, so equal kayo”…tska minsan naiisip ko rin na ” ako lang me hard feelings sa kanya so ako lang nagsa-suffer”…until magwane na ung inis..at eventually siguro maging immuned or dedma na lang..

  68. hi, i’m from canada. just wanted to share with you what i am going thru right now. i am dealing with a lot of difficult people at work since most of us are of different nationalities, with different upbringing all put in one department. dito halos araw araw stress na stress na ako sa trabaho stress pa rin sa mga tao dahil hindi ko alam kung paano sila pakikisamahan. it’s affecting my health, my sanity and most of all my family. like in the early part nang article ni Bo na “pinagdadasal ko na sana tamaan na sila ng kidlat at ma-karma” i know that’s bad pero nandun na ako sa peak ng aking stress na halos bumitaw na ako at mag-resign na sa trabaho pero iniisip ko pa rin na ito lang ang bumubuhay sa amin so i still need to hold on to my job because it provides not only for my family here in canada but also back home in the philippines. right now i’m still searching on how to cope with this kind of problem dahil wala akong mapagsabihan at wala rin akong mapagkatiwalaan sa opisina dahil maraming pag kaharap ka ay mabait pero pag talikod mo ay kung anu-ano na ang sinasabi tungkol sa iyo at galit pala sa iyo. at first i tried ignoring it but it didn’t work so i tried to be vocal and honest but it still didn’t work so now i’m at a loss as to what i should do. panay pa rin ang dasal ko na tulungan akong maging matatag sa pagsubok na ito pero hanggang kailan. suggestion nga rin ng asawa ko magpaka-showbiz na lang ako pero ang hirap gawin lalo na’t gusto mong magpakatotoo pero sa pagpapakatotoo mo e lumalabas na sa akin pa nanggagaling ang problema. so it’s really a very tough situation that i’m in. hindi na nga ako mapagkatulog, hindi na ako nakakain ng mahusay at pati ang health ko ay naaapektuhan na rin at ganun din ang pamilya ko. i’m hoping that with your next article i’ll be able to find the answer to what i’m searching or looking for.

    p.s. with this comment, i’m also sharing with everyone who are thinking of working or migrating in another country of what they will be dealing with when it comes to different personalities from different countries and backgrounds. miss ko na nga sa pinas kahit na stress ka sa trabaho hindi mo nararamdaman dahil nandon ang samahan, tiwala, suporta at lalong lalo na ang pagkakaibigan.

  69. I welcome difficult people in my life…these are challenges that will surely serve our purposes in our life journey…great article Sir Bo! I’m your avid fan!

  70. Hi Bo! I am a silent reader of your articles and books…It seems for me, I have no one to turn to except your writings…because thru them I find God, my comfort.

    My life is very sad. I’m a happy person, jolly and bubbly…that’s my real personality. Until I discovered about my husband’s infidelity. For me, he is the difficult person in my life because he made this life a misery…sorrowful..He has taken out all my reasons to be happy. I thought before that I have the best and most kind husband in the world even though we are not rich. But then, all of a sudden, I discovered, that I was totally wrong. I cry whenever I think of him. I wanted to get out of our marriage but my only one daughter might get hurt and affected…that I cannot afford…to hurt her feelings. I want her to live a normal life..complete family. My husband works abroad and for so many years I have been a mother and father to my daughter. But she still lives normally with that kind of situation because she knows she has her dad abroad. But then, I already lost trust to my husband. He doesn’t respect me as the mother of his child nor he loves me. I don’t feel that he loves me because if he does, he won’t make sex with other woman. Yes, he had an affair with a girl working in the same country where he is right now…that me more miserable. I want to get out of our marriage because i don’t feel his love anymore but how about my daughter???i don’t know what to do..what to decide because it always involve my daughter.and i love my daughter so much…

  71. hey hi…bo i have a diffucult person right now..he’s my ex-bf…im trying to handle things with him pero it seems im giving up…i always ask the Good Lord to help me each day :)

  72. Actually there is one difficult person in my life these days. He /She makes our workplace a stressful environment to be in. Madami ang nagkakasit - emotionally and physically dahil sa mga demands niya and the negative vibes he/she sends out. Halos lahat ng tao, pwera lang sa mga sipsip ay gusto na siyang e kick out (kung pwede nga lang kaso…nasa taas na position siya)…Ewan namin kung bakit bulag at bingi ang higher management sa corruptive ways niya. Dahil din kaya despite our difficultiies with this person, we do our job excellently…no questions asked na lang kami lahat …to keep the peace well. Haha…siya pa rin nag benefit at umaani sa fruits of the laborer’s labor!!!
    The positive things I learned while around these person/s are: Natoto akong magpaseynsya ng todo-todo. Learned to correct mistakes in a gentler way..And mas naging supportive ako sa mga ka officemates ko. I learned the BIG difference between compassionate authority and authority for authority’s sake…and i know someday, when its my turn to be in their place if ever i will still be around this workplace, I will NOT be like them

  73. i think im one of the difficult people, simply because i couldnt forgive that one person who hurt me, my ex-boyfriend. last january, he left without care, on the year we are supposed to get married. he left me hanging big time.

    now, i try as much to get away from him as possible because i am being reminded of what a jerk he was, and how stupid i had been for putting up with that kind of guy for so long. i felt like i have wasted ten precious years of my life, because i have invested so much in a relationship that ended in a very bad note.

    i have to give up my choir because i found out that he was having relationship with this younger girl even before we broke up. the betrayal really makes me mad, and the thought of me having to leave that one group i loved and nurtured, at their expense makes me want to lash out at them. i find it really unfair, but they left me no choice because i couldn’t possibly play hypocrites with them and pretend that everything is fine and dandy.

    sigh. i know that God wants me to learn something from this event. at my tender moments, i always find myself crying from hurt and lost trust. am i too bad for not being able to forgive such monstrosity? please help me pray for the grace. i dont want to be difficult anymore.

  74. I am a mother of two..the difficult person im life right now is my eldest who’s age is 6…but he is very extraordinary person…or maybe he became a difficult person because I was a difficutl mother too…actually i accept… i myself was a difficult person…coz of the experiences that i had along the marriage with my husband…and he is always seeing us fighting…screaming…and he sees me crying all the time…now it really difficult for me to deal with my son…coz i want him to be a good person…sometimes i pitty him that he’ll be shouted by other people and telling words like makulit…and bad…im sad…please pray for my healing and my son too..

  75. I am probably the difficult person in other people’s lives. But we have issues that made us react negatively. Sometimes, its easy to think that he/she must be suffering from unbearable prob that caused her to be difficult to deal with. Sabi nga nila you learn kindness from the unkind. I always try to stay calm and dont react negatively on things but it would take a while. I know its causing people to be aloof most of the time but its leaving us alone makes more things complicated. Feeling din namin di kami nila naiintindihan. If there is someone that we can be comfortable with talking about the issue makes it relieving. Siguro if we gently talk or approach to them mas hindi violent reactions nila, just make them feel that you always care and Im sure they are trying to change for you.

  76. Hi Bo,
    The one difficult person in my life right now is my only BROTHER, who has given me so many heartaches & problems. This brother of mine is a widower w/ 4 small kids. He’s really a miss & so irresponsible, especially now after his wife’s death. He doesn’t seem to care for his children’s future, it’s maybe because he knows that us his sisters are always here to help support them. But Bo, we also have our own families to support & to provide for… Please help me pray for my brother to mend his ways & to make him realize that it’s important for him to be responsible for his children… Thanks…

  77. I have a wife that I cherised and she has done nothing but abondoned me and harras me. I tried councelling, prayer, talking time, but she just keeps stabbing me. She stole all our money and dissapeared with my children. She uses the children against me and I cannot contact her. This has gone on for quite some time where I almost had a nervous breakdown. She has destroyed one business I put together for the family and is attempting to destroy the other. I just do not get or understand. I have my faults and she does not. She is perfect. The only mistake she made in her life was marrying me. I am sick of trying and have been told by religious and many others to move on. She is a spiteful, vengeful person. I am closer to God. I feel like I have to dress for WAR everyday and be prepared for the unexpected from her. She makes me worry all the time, etc.. I am from another country and I am in her country now. The odds are stacked against me except doing the right thing on my part and relying on God for the rest. Dont know why I am writing this. But I did. so there.

  78. Hi! This is definitely something new. I believe God sends us difficult people because he wants us to become more patient and pattern the way we love into His way of loving. Remember, we are all difficult at some point, but He loves us still. He teaches us to practice sacrificial love because in learning this we give more value and meaning to our lives. I also think he sends us difficult people so that we can try and do our best to change them. Or to see if we are also committing similar kinds of sins so that we become more sensitive with our own attitudes. As Mahatma Gandhi said “Be the change you want to see in the world.” He sends us difficult people to polish our values more. We learn important values not easily but through hard work and difficult people are God’s instuments somehow in making this happen. :)

    I also want to comment on what LOVING SISTER said. I read the whole of your text because I can relate to what you said. I have the best mom in the world but my dad just never stopped cheating on her. from my first brother down to me, youngest of us four, and even up to now when he has apos. It’s really heartbreaking. But guess what? with God’s grace I was still able to love him and take care of him. I don’t know how I was able to do that but God provided the love in my heart. These kinds of experiences could either BREAK or MAKE us. and I choose to make it contribute to making me a better person, to really love fully as a daughter. I’m praying for you. Just continue loving, forgiving, and offering all the hurts to God. Before you know it, things would be a whole lot better. And even if it would take long, you would end up with no regrets because you loved your best and did all you can to save your relationship. God Bless.

  79. Difficult…

    I think the word is not apt enough to describe this person in my life. It’s just simply DIFFICULT to look for word that word best portray her.

    I mean how would you describe somebody who’s just simple a pain in the head? Somebody who finds mistake in everything you do? Somebody who looks for error rather than being thankful I did something for her? Ugh!

    I thank God though that I have tons of patience so we never had an argument. But many times I found myself fuming in rage. Anger ate my sensibility and I just found myself hating her in silence.

    But you see, God has strange way of tapping our heart to wake up the anger that’s sleeping in our heart.

    A life-changing experience changed my complete perspective about her when I realized that what she was doing was not really meant to hurt me in any way. I can’t go into details lest I’ll end up writing a novel.

    The main point is that sometimes people are difficult without being aware that they are DIFFICULT. :)

  80. Difficult People Make Me Close to God

    Having a companion (at the office) who is difficult to understand is a sacrifice that’s my feeling whenever I encountered difficult persons. Because their mind is close to accept explanation from others resulting to a negative reaction to a situation. Minsan pa nga kapag mababa ang self esteem ko nakahahawa at nakaka-create ng fear na pati ako ay nagkakaroon ng negative thoughts na humahantong sa takot na makisalamuha sa iba.

    Whenever I feel that situation, that is the time I know God is calling me, I go to church and goes straight to the adoration chapel to talk to God and to explain my fear and lift them up to God. And whenever I talk to God, He explains everything, He brightens my mind and lightens up my difficulty in dealing with people na ang tawag ko ay matigas ang ulo. Minsan nga ginigising ako ni God kapag matigas ang ulo ko, at nangyayari yon kapag nagyayabang ako. God reminds me always na wala akong kayamanan sa mundo at lahat ng ito ay hiram ko lang kay God.

    I should understand others the way God understand me. I should always remember PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE! HUMILITY IS A MUST!

    Thanks Bro. Bo for taking your time to hear us, God Bless Us All!

  81. Funny but after thinking for a very long time I can’t think of any difficult person in my life right now but myself….honestly I feel like I’m two persons in one body…as much as I want to face the challenges of life as much as I want to put confidence in what I do and can do, this other person in me just never fails to pull me down….I am very aware of all the blessings GOD is giving me and I feel ashamed as I am wasting all these blessings because of my weaknesses. I am too weak to fight this other person within me…I am praying, praying so hard that GOD would send someone who will help me pull her away, if not, give me the super mega to the max strength to fight and finally succeed……

  82. Dear Bo,

    I am now experiencing stress and depression because of a very difficult person in our work place. There are times that I want to quit but my sister is telling me to be patient and enduring. I usually tell her that it is easy for her to say that since she is not in my position. One time she laughed at me and told me that she also has a difficult person in her work place. I’ve asked her what she does whenever “the difficult person” makes her life miserable? She told me plainly that you just have to accept and forgive the person as she is. She added that I could not do that overnight. It took her time before she did it. I’m now contemplating to do the same, hope I’ll be successful. I’ve learned also that I grew stronger now. Stronger in faith since I cling only to the hope that one day all will be well because God is great all the time.

    Thanks Bo for all the inspiring books and real life lessons you give to us. God is great for giving you to us.

    John

  83. difficult persons are blessings in disguise you’re right, we should welcome them in our lives.

    my permanent difficult person in my life is my husband of 30 years with whom i have 3 kids, (perhaps i am also his permanent difficult person). you rarely win in an argument with him so there are very few fights with him since i tend to avoid them. he believes he’s right most of the time, he used to have a short fuse when he was younger it sometimes shows up, that’s why if we argue, i tend to stop it early with silence. he looks at the negative side more than the positive even with his own kids such that he tends to label them and plays favorites, i just pray to God for him and my kids non-stop. he can be self-centered it’s most difficult to correct him, and thinks he’s better than so and so; but i believe God sent him to me for a reason that is beneficial to me. i think the gifts He intended in sending this difficult person to me are: patience, perseverance and fortitude, humility, forgiveness and unconditional love.

  84. i encounter those thing that people who is difficult to handle but in sincere prayers,it can be melted those attitude,i experienced it soooooooooooooooo many times in my job,and it can be solved,JUST PRAY ON IT AND ASK FOR IT,SEEK ON IT TO GOD

  85. Love, patience, kindness, compassion.. Almost every fruit of the Holy Spirit in Galatians has been the result and gift of God to me for this difficult person. For over a decade now I’ve had this friend who has a dependency problem along with a hurtful past that has complicated his attitude and character.

    It has affected the friends he claims to be his friends so much that they don’t want to claim his friendship. And most of these friends he claims to be his friends talk to me about it since I’ve been the longest friend among the friends he calims to be friends. How can you cope with him Galatian? That’s always the question they ask me.

    I tell them: I’ve learned that to change a person is not my job but God’s job. But we can pray for him because as we pray for him God doesn’t actually change him but He changes us to understand him more. God changes us to become better persons. God changes us to love him more. And if you look at it that way then our friend changes for the better… that will just be the bonus from what has changed in you.

  86. I couldn’t recall now what I had used to do when faced with an offensive person. I think normally I’d feel resentful and angry, as I may still initially do now. But now thanks be to God, encounters with such people becomes an occasion for me to call on the word of God as they seem in my heart appropriate:

    1. love your enemies (them)
    2. bless your enemies (them)
    3. pray for (them) everyone
    4. confront them privately after praying
    5. confront them infront of witnesses
    6. not “throw pearls before them”
    7. cast them (your worries) upon the Lord
    8. rejoice in the Lord (always)
    9. Give thanks (in all things)

    Assuredly after having gone through all this hindi muna siya kailangan bigwasan.

    One time, I mistakenly forgot that I had parked my car infront of a resturant along then Pasay Rd. When I remembered and got back, all my four tires had been deflated. I confronted the owner (an Italian I believe) and told him that I was sorry I forgot I had parked my car inappropriately but that he shouldn’t have done that to my tires. He said I had it coming and I learned from the parking attendants of adjacent establishments that even a lady driver had suffered similarly. I eventually got the tires fixed after a few hours and I had in mind to report him to my friend in city hall and have his permit suspended or revoked, but after praying remembered that “vengeance is mine, says the Lord.”

    I cast the incident unto the Lord and let my action be a witness to those who helped me fix the tires. After a couple of weeks I saw the restaurant padlocked and under guards! It turned out that the owner of the property had gotten a court order to close down and take possesion of everything inside, lock, stock and barrel so to speak.

    In praise of God,
    Alex

  87. About 90% of my bosses when I migrated to LA are what people would normally consider difficult - one was a pathological liar who makes up stories about co-workers and got them fired (he was the Chief Financial Officer), one was an arrogant bully and liar (another CFO), one was very temperamental (you guess it right, a CFO..makes you wonder what are they teaching the accounting students here), the current one looks down on immigrants and would rather have men working for him than women (he is gay). Fortunately, all except the pathological liar who was fired became close to me and learned to trust me and valued my opinions. I tried to know them, their childhood, dig deeper to find out the source of their negativity. I was also not afraid to speak up and stand my ground. Not showing fear and speaking up is usually the antidote to a bully. They finally realized that I can be trusted. Some of them just feel threatened that I would take over their jobs. I believe the special gifts that we are give are patience, courage but above all, understanding & wisdom. My current boss (the gay one) got rid of my 2 co-workers who are guys and now treats me like his sister and confidante.

  88. Bo, when i 1st attended the feast, this was your topic, and both me and my mom was deeply touch, we even cried during your talk, only to realized that kami pala ung difficult person sa buhay namin, ha ha ha…. i guess i’m the worst difficult person in her life ( i was very young then ). LOL. after that “realization” i guess little by little we tried to patch those difficulties, no body is perfect.
    Bo i can handle diffucult persons in my life as long as he/she not in the family, so their this one person who really makes our life a living hell and sad to say he even my brother in law, you see he’s a parasite in our family, he make my sister like a robot and even hurt her, pinapulis na nga namin eh, kaso ung ate ko rin ang may problema nasa system na yata nya. before talagang nakikialam ako pero magsasawa ka rin eh, i just give all to the Lord, kaya lang minsan talagang sasabog ka rin because last dec 21 ung isang pamangkin ko ( nasa akin sya ako ang nagpapalaki, but i let them have her once in a while) told me na hinahawakan daw sya ng papa nya duon and she make some actions that really amkes my birthday the worst time of my life, hindi muna ako nag react sa kanya sinumbong ko sya\, but what can we do… until last March 19 talagang sumabog na ko, we even went to barangays, but the DSWD said that they will get the custody of my niece, so we just din’t bother to continue the case. hay Bo if i will tell you all baka maubos ang space na ito… basta ngayon i just really give it all to him bahala na lang ang panginoon sa kanya alam naman nya lahat lahat….. because i also have my own family to take care of baka magkasakit naman ako eh i still have a toddler son who also need me. for now we just make my niece forget about it and give her more love and attention than before.. sometimess difficult persons are needed in our life to make us a stronger person, otherwise, life will be less boring.
    Lord thank you for all this trials and this person who makes my life difficult, because they give colors to my day.
    ( sometimes i put lord pwede past muna ngayon kasi medyo, wala ako sa mood) LOL
    Bo thank you for that topic it makes me realized how much difficult person in our live does not have to be negative,…. GOD Bless YOU!!!!

  89. There’s always something nice and great about people i would consider “difficult”. There always is… Come to think of it, i may also be “difficult” from their point of view!

    The best way i handle “difficult” people? I always think everyone was created in God’s image - then they don’t seem difficult anymore. :-)

  90. Dear Bo,

    Exactly I am hit by your message. I think the LORD is using you to send the message to me. I have problem with my officemate we have to minimize expenses but some of my officemate even personal expenses was included on their replenishment. A while ago three of my officemate chatting about me maybe their manager call their attention. I hate corrupt people here in our office there are lots of it. I keep on praying to the HOLY SPIRIT that he guide me and the rest of the people so that the company won’t suffer. But I know I can handle the situation it was just work related, there a lot of things i encountered more than this but still nalalagpasan ko. I know that JESUS is leading me everyday. GOD BLESS.

  91. One thing iv’e learned, God allows those difficult person to come into our life for us to become a better person, a better christian. From then , you will understand more the love God has given to us. Everytime i encountered problems, trials, i always think na wala lang to sa hirap na dinanas ni GOD nung ipako siya sa cross. At sa ganun, lahat lahat mawawala lang ….na bawat luha na papatak sa aking mga mata….alam ko katumbas nitoy kaligayahang wlang hanggan. Maybe, its difficult to understand….but the difficult person in my life since i was a child is my MOTHER…..a mother whom u think will protect you from anybody is the one who will make your life miserable…who almost make you crazy. YES, its true….and with that experience muntik na akong mabaliw…and if that happen she (mom) is the reason na mawawalan ng ina ang mga anak ko….then i asked help from GOD……i ONLY believe that theres GOD but knowing him deeper ay HINDI…….that time i knew to myself HE’S REAL….if you just open your heart and surender everything…. you will feel the presence within HIM , HIS love.
    Just don’t give up….keep on trying even its hard. I believe i can make that difficult person to be a better one when you learn to forgive. I believe everything happen in my life has reason and i thank that…. just believe! NOthing is possible to HIM.I thank GOD for those trials, yes i do coz it makes me what i am now … Im happy now coz i know HE’S always at my side…. GOD BLESS!!!

  92. well, when i’ll be writing this i’ll be so undefined person promised!
    i do believed they exists and i do believed that they are serving different pusposes. This fact now, made me wonder much and is making my actuations specially toward this person, more difficult. I may sound not so clear but its a long story to share to you the details. Hopefully, a brief summary will do.
    Im just so dumb in love with this person i knew in college.. We were classmates then and both gained our career here in Manila. Last March 2008, i was just so mean and aggressive to tell him i love him. Only to found out that he’s not yet ready to inter into a relationship. But were dating since that event. I know from the start where I stand in his life…but now, I am hurting my self when some though very simple expectations I have for him won’t be met. Now, my question is: Am I the difficult person or him?

    Thanks for reading. Hope you’ll find time sharing your thoughts to me and would in a way help me make things clear.

  93. Yes. We have and he is really getting in all our nerves in the Team. So many are leaving the project now because of him. Even me I sometimes think of it too.

    Bro. Bo, everyday I pray that may God touches his heart that he will not become irrational and illogical to us and for me to be more patient and understanding with him. Yet, it seems I couldn’t hold on my temper if he is treating me or others such as a slave person in the office and who is really helpless in every situation, especially nowadays.He is doing it to everyone even to my boss. By the way, our Team composes few companies hence, each company is being represented by big boss too.

    I’m sure the continuation of this article you had been posted Bro. Bo will help us understand more deeply why these things happened to us.

    Thank you for being a Heaven sent. Hope you’ll include us in your prayers.

    God bless you and your family.

  94. emma, huwag kang mag-alala at humingin ng tawad sa nararamdaman mo dahil hindi mo naman kasalanan iyon!
    Maganda naman iyong ginawa mo mula sa naramdaman mong iyon e! :)

    Ang mahiwagang yamang kakayahan na binigay sa akin ng Panginoon para sa mga magugulong tao dito sa mundo ay ang aking pagiging inosente, masayahin, at humanistik. Naliligtas ako sa kanila kasi tinitignan ko pa rin ang kagandahan sa loob nila basta hindi ako nagugulo gamit ang mga ito! ;D

  95. Dear Bo,

    This particular article comes as a kick in my head, just when I am complaining about this ever difficult person in my life - my boss. I feel he annoys me not only as a boss at work but also as a person in my social life.

    I am not sure if I have taken the godly lesson from this person; but I think I got some hints: not to hate him, but to take him just the way he is (coz I want to be loved just the way I am as well); not to swear or curse on him even at my wits end, instead to take him into contemplation.. bottom line is to be patient on him.

    It’s easier said than done, eh? I still find myself mocking behind him just for the things he said and done. I sometimes wonder what makes me hate him so; what triggers this negativity. All I can do best now is avoiding him; just to avoid my negative responses coming into surface.

    *still dwelling*

  96. Yes Bro. Bo I have a difficult person in my life . . . he is my ex bf for almost 8 months… we’ve been steady for almost 7 years of our relationship… he break up with me 8 months ago…. i could still feel the pain he cause me …. i hate him for giving me this kind of feelings pinaasa nya ako na kami ang magkakatuluyan but all of sudden iniwanan din nya ako at my age ryt now … 29 yrs old im afraid na tatanda akong dalaga and im blame him for that na pakiramdam ko pinaasa nya ako din bigla nalang akong iniwan sa ere ang sakit sakit para sa akin na tanggapin ang lahat…. its very difficult for me to forget and forgive that person. i know too i could blame also my self kong bakit nangyari sa amin un .. .. i m the one also forced him kong bakit nag hanap sya ng iba sa ibang bansa pinaramdam ko rin kc sa kanya na i think i could not wait him for another 2 years because of my age sabi nya kc pinapaaral pa nya ung kapatid nya for another 2 years pero wala naman sya pinangako kong kilan nya ako pakakasalan he left me kc sabi ko daw di naman ako makapaghintay sa kanya which is hindi nya naman sinabi kong until when ako mahhihintay. … 8months na kaming walang communication after our broke up …but still i could not forget him everyday…. its very hard for me to go on with my life ryt now. im still depressed and lonely. i could not still forgive him minsan sinasabi ko napatawad ko n sya but deep inside my heart hindi parin i know kailangan ko na syang kalimutan at patawarin but it’s really really hard for me. andaming evil thoughts ang gusto kong gawin sa kanya at sa babae nya but i know di tama un . . . how i wish i can forgive and forget!

  97. I do have a difficult person in my life and through the years I’ve been constantly hounded by questions from friends and family why I stick it out with this person.

    Inside this kind and loving man is a wounded soul and being such he usually makes wrong decisions that hurt not only himself but me as well. But i do and still believe that one day all these will pass and he will be a new person.

    If there is one gift this experience taught me that would be faith; faith in the Lord that He will touch this person and heal his wounds; faith in the intrinsic goodness of people (even when sometimes it becomes difficult to surface); and faith in myself that through patience and love I will be able to help and heal this difficult person in my life.

  98. i still have to meet one…

  99. Meeting with different kinds of people don’t warrant me in dealing with difficult persons. In medical world, we must be patient to our patients and it is easier because I know the reason why are they’re acting or behaving such ways. But it is very different from co-workers or superiors… sometimes they are irritating, condescending and they do get into my nerves but I’d rather keep my composure and held on my patience. I don’t retaliate or argue head-on because I know it will be much more stressful for me… I’d rather talk about whatever situation to my closest friend and pray. It is much more lighter for me that way. And I do some meditating or delve myself into deeper thoughts, maybe it is me who are difficult and if I am, I learned to ask for God’s grace to change me because I realize I cannot please nor change everyone… so there…

  100. My boyfriend whose worthless enough and so dependent on me but yet so ungrateful. too bad.

  101. Hi, Bo! It’s so good for you to have thought of this topic! I and my family have a very difficult person in our midst. He is my brother. But I believe God blessed us with him because he is teaching us to be humble, to be understanding, to be patient, etc. He is separated from his wife and son, had been out of job for for 10 years now, got sick with TB and has changed so much physically! He is a very difficult person because
    he is very irritable even with slight faults or mistakes,
    curses my mother and almost everyone of us in the family; so full of pride, inconsiderate of other’s feelings, and a lot more! He quarrels with everyone: my mother, sister, brother, my children and comments on everyone negatively. When he opens his mouth to speak, there is nothing good and beautiful that he says. We continue day and night praying that he will change; that God will give him wisdom and enlightenment.
    Let’s pray for all the difficult persons in the world so that we ourselves will not be difficult persons to them!

  102. Just reading everybody’s share of difficult persons in their lives makes me feel blessed that the difficult persons I have encountered are not members of my family.

    Marami din akong na-meet na difficult and from time to time I deal with one in my job (he’s our company’s partner). However, I think God gives difficult persons in our lives “para subukin ang ating pagka-Kristiano”.

    Like one of the earlier comments, these people may also label us as difficult din.

    Reading the article makes me realize that they are God’s children as well. Kasi minsan if the person is so difficult, we tend to forget that (kasi nga nasa Dark side sya ng force, ba!).

    Yes, patience is also enhanced thru experiences with difficult people. One day, we will reach the patience level that they are no longer difficult because we have learned to live with them or God has touched their lives that they change to a better person.

    Late last year, this difficult boss called me on 31 Dec to comment on a particular job-related incident (very typical of him). But to my amazement, he asked How I was!!!!! Well that’s unusual and I think that’s God’s work.

    Thank you, Lord, for touching this person! Please continue doing so (kasi minsan makulit pa din at unreasonable.

    Thanks, Bo for reminding us of the blessings we receive in meeting these people!

    God Bless!!!

  103. Hey i am a difficult person………..

  104. It’s been 4 months since I aacepted the job to be the secretary of my boss. I was warned though about his not so good attitude but I still accepted the offer. Since then, my everyday life changed, even my attitude changed. I always have butterfies in my stomach everytime I go to his office. He is really a very difficult person and was not at all comfortable working with him. I learned that he had a difficult past that resulted him to be bitter about life.

    But I did not stop from there.. I asked my cell groupmates for prayers.. Every sunday , during our cell meeting, I will always ask them to pray for my boss so that he will be healed. The Lord is so good because He listen to our prayers, my boss is starting to change.. Most of my ofcmates are suprised with his new attitude.. I just told them, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD!!

  105. It’s been 4 months since I aacepted the job to be the secretary of my boss. I was warned though about his not so good attitude but I still accepted the offer. Since then, my everyday life changed, even my attitude changed. I always have butterfies in my stomach everytime I go to his office. He is really a very difficult person and was not at all comfortable working with him. I learned that he had a difficult past that resulted him to be bitter about life.

    But I did not stop from there.. I asked my cell groupmates for prayers.. Every sunday , during our cell meeting, I will always ask them to pray for my boss so that he will be healed. The Lord is so good because He listened to our prayers, my boss is starting to change.. Most of my ofcmates are suprised with his new attitude.. I just told them, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD!!

  106. Thank you Lord for the gift of patience. Praise God!

  107. Hi Bro.Bo,
    I am a silent reader of your articles and it really helps me a lot.
    The first most difficult person in my life is my father.He is selfish,drunkard,irresponsible.He likes to show-off, he`s good to other people but to us his family he is very
    mean and unsupportive.He treats my mother as his maid,not as his wife, but somebody that will follow all his commands.
    I tried to change our family by helping my siblings go to college,and at the same time helping my mother to get off the financial problems we had then.But after helping them,compromising my own studies just to work for them,they did not even help me to finish my studies,my siblings just go on with their flourishing careers and big salaries.at least they said thank you to me.
    It`s really sad that sometimes our family becomes the difficult person in our life,but i`ve learned to accept that reality.
    In my prayers i always tell God to bless all the people who made my life difficult and bless me to be a strong person so i can face those people with a smile.

  108. My korean-american manager sometimes cannot talk without hurting people. He has his way of delivering things that are very degrading and ego-shattering. He says that this is to challenge us to strive for the better but people in the dept are slowly moving out because of his attitude (I don’t think he has realized this yet). I dont know if I can stay in this job for long although there are a lot of things I can learn from the company.

    God is teaching me to be patient and to love my “enemies”..eto na sya! =) … pray for me.

  109. the most difficult person in my world is also my angel. however the evil inside him is called autism.

    my 4 year old son caught this disease for reasons we have not confirmed yet. everyday is a challenge, and everyday it draws me closer to God asking Him to touch my son with His healing hands.

    a day has never passed without me feeling how truly blessed i am with my angel and 2 other lovely kids, they never fail to give my stomach butterflies.

    u gotta have faith!!!

  110. Hi Bro bo..
    up to now nag dududa padin ako sa mister ko kung true na nag bago n sya sa pambabae nya. kc nakaka basa p ko ng mga txt ng girl sa cell nya minsan p nga malalaswa mga txt . wala padin akong peace of mind sa kanya pinag papa sa dios k nalng si lord nlang bahala sa kanya. pero masakit p din po pag po naiisip ko lalo n girl pa baby nmin natatkot ako someday sa kasabihang baka balikan ng karma ang anak namin. Pray ko po kay LORD na patatagin nya ako at maayos n ang relasyon nming mag asawa at mag tino n po ng totoo ang mister ko. tama n po ang pasakit at sakit n naranasan ko sa mister ko ng dahil lang sa girl nya. patawarin po ako ni lord kc lagi ko sinasabi n bangungut sakin mister ko.. bakit mister ko pa ang mag lulubog sakin ..lord help me po…

  111. thanks for having this topic… grabe!!! i always wanted to voice out my sentiments. i’m having problem with my in laws… a brother and a sister in law to be exact. my husband and me live in their house (kaya kasama namin ang brother in law ko sa house) along with our baby and yaya. He’s older than me but he calls me “ate”, he’s a very ill-tempered person although sometimes i feel that namamlastik lang sya ng pakikitungo sa akin kasi nga i’m the wife of his kuya, there are times na he invite me to eat kapag nadadatnan ko syang kumakain or he would acknowledge my presence and sometimes he totally ignore me. It’s okey with me pero kasi my time na sobrang ignore nya ako at pati ang anak kong 2years old ay dinadamay nyang hindi pansinin. I don’t remember anything na ginawa ko or sinabing masama that might have offended him. Pero oftentimes than not, parang wala siyang respeto sa akin. my sister in law on the other hand doesn’t live with us but her two (2) kids (13 girl and 10 boy) stays with us every weekend although during vacation (either summer or christmas vacation) they go to our place. These two kids bugged kasi bata pa lang sila plastic na, (sorry for the term… i just don’t know kung anong term ang mas appropriate…) They were only nice and give respect to me (kiss me on the cheek or mag-mamano) in the presence of my husband or their parents kapag wala sila deadma ako… i could live with it kaya lang pati ang pakikitungo nila sa anak ko pinaplastic din nila. I learned from the yaya na pinagdadamutan nila ang bata, they would even tease her with food and let her watch them eat their food dahil kanila yun. In short kung ano ang food sa bahay sa aming lahat kung sila ang bumili kanila lang. Their mom is also mataray pero i could deal with her, kasi the think pinaplastik ko sila sa pakikitungo ko but GOD knows i’m trying my best to be sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo patient with them… there are alot of things (bad things) that had happened between me and my in laws pero napatawad ko na sila ngayon kaya lang right now pati ang anak ko dinadamay nila… what can a 2 year old kid can do against them. Much as i want to live separately from them but my husband and my salary are not enough so we just stay with them… i still have alot of stories about their “pakikipag-plastikan” with me and my child. Pero like most of us who write here, we are lifting it to GOD! i know that HE is giving me the gift of patience… i’m a very patient person but lately i can’t stand knowing how they treat my child. It’s so unfair kasi wala syang laban… i don’t want her to grow up “madamot” like her cousin but it’s not impossible because she could see them and even hears them saying “bad words” like buwisit and S_ _ T! infront of he… i always cry GOD help me to understand and be more patient with them… but i don’t know until when i could hold on… HELP!!! thank you and GODBless!!!

  112. I work with someone who seems to have the word LAZY embossed on his forehead. Not only that, he is rude, always has side-comments for everything, and worse, acts like the super-busy angel when the big bosses are around. I took that all in stride for a year and a half… Why?

    His attitude taught me to be self-sufficient. I relied on my own capabilities, and survived all this time. Just recently, I reported his behavior to my Supervisor, since he behaved rudely in front of a patient we both had. But then, I felt sorry for him, since he still does not understand the purpose of his work.

    Like one proverb oncce said. Three men are my friends… he who LOVES me, he who HATES me and he who is INDIFFERENT to me.

    He who loves me teaches me COMPASSION, he who hates me teaches me to be ON MY GUARD, and he who is indifferent to me teaches me SELF-RELIANCE.

  113. I work with someone who seems to have the word LAZY embossed on his forehead. Not only that, he is rude, always has side-comments for everything, and worse, acts like the super-busy angel when the big bosses are around. I took that all in stride for a year and a half… Why?

    His attitude taught me to be self-sufficient. I relied on my own capabilities, and survived all this time. Just recently, I reported his behavior to my Supervisor, since he behaved rudely in front of a patient we both had. But then, I felt sorry for him, since he still does not understand the purpose of his work.

    Like one proverb once said. Three men are my friends… he who LOVES me, he who HATES me and he who is INDIFFERENT to me.

    He who loves me teaches me COMPASSION, he who hates me teaches me to be ON MY GUARD, and he who is indifferent to me teaches me SELF-RELIANCE.

  114. thanks for having this topic… grabe!!! i always wanted to voice out my sentiments. i’m having problem with my in laws… a brother and a sister in law to be exact. my husband and me live in their house (kaya kasama namin ang brother in law ko sa house) along with our baby and yaya. He’s older than me but he calls me “ate”, he’s a very ill-tempered person although sometimes i feel that namamlastik lang sya ng pakikitungo sa akin kasi nga i’m the wife of his kuya, there are times na he invite me to eat kapag nadadatnan ko syang kumakain or he would acknowledge my presence and sometimes he totally ignore me. It’s okey with me pero kasi my time na sobrang ignore nya ako at pati ang anak kong 2years old ay dinadamay nyang hindi pansinin. I don’t remember anything na ginawa ko or sinabing masama that might have offended him. Pero oftentimes than not, parang wala siyang respeto sa akin. my sister in law on the other hand doesn’t live with us but her two (2) kids (13 girl and 10 boy) stays with us every weekend although during vacation (either summer or christmas vacation) they go to our place. These two kids bugged kasi bata pa lang sila plastic na, (sorry for the term… i just don’t know kung anong term ang mas appropriate…) They were only nice and give respect to me (kiss me on the cheek or mag-mamano) in the presence of my husband or their parents kapag wala sila deadma ako… i could live with it kaya lang pati ang pakikitungo nila sa anak ko pinaplastic din nila. I learned from the yaya na pinagdadamutan nila ang bata, they would even tease her with food and let her watch them eat their food dahil kanila yun. In short kung ano ang food sa bahay sa aming lahat kung sila ang bumili kanila lang. Their mom is also mataray pero i could deal with her, kasi the think pinaplastik ko sila sa pakikitungo ko but GOD knows i’m trying my best to be sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo patient with them… there are alot of things (bad things) that had happened between me and my in laws pero napatawad ko na sila ngayon kaya lang right now pati ang anak ko dinadamay nila… what can a 2 year old kid can do against them. Kung ako lang kaya kong ihandle but hindi ko kayang makitang pati ang anak ko dinadamay nila sa inis nila sa akin… Much as i want to live separately from them but my husband and my salary are not enough so we just stay with them… i still have alot of stories about their “pakikipag-plastikan” with me and my child. Pero like most of us who write here, we are lifting it to GOD! i know that HE is giving me the gift of patience… i’m a very patient person but lately i can’t stand knowing how they treat my child. It’s so unfair kasi wala syang laban… i don’t want her to grow up “madamot” like her cousin but it’s not impossible because she could see them and even hears them saying “bad words” like buwisit and S_ _ T! She would utter these words na din without knowing the meaning of the word. For three years I’ve been praying for them… even lifting them to the LORD that HE may bless them and touch their hearts… i always cry to GOD everyday to help me, to understand and be more patient with them… but i don’t know until when i could hold on… HELP!!! thank you and GODBless!!!

  115. hi! i would just like to share with you what i have been experiencing right now with a very special friend.. i dont know if i he\’s really a difficult person to deal with but i consider him as one heck of a guy.. i truly love this person and i am very happy when i am with him.. i help him in very inch of the way when he needs my help.. i never fail to text him everyday and he got the same attitude towards me.. i accepted the fact that it cant be the two of us, that we are just friends, best friends most probably.. that was our set up not until last friday (May 9), i texted him at around 1:30 in the afternoon and i didn\’t receive a reply from him until evening.. i texted him repeatedly and he sent a reply at 11 PM with an annoying tone in his text message.. we argued about it that night but to no avail.. but still i keep on texting him everyday until this day.. i tried to ask for help from our friends but they could not persuade him either to talk to me.. one of our friends told me this morning that he is really very \”matigas\” when they are speaking about me.. bro. Bo, he is one of the most important people in my life and i love him so much.. please help me in praying for us.. honestly, i am at the point of giving up buit i know that there is still hope in the Lord.. dakal pung salamat in advance! God bless you and your family!

  116. Bro. Bo, thanks for having this topic… grabe!!! i always wanted to voice out my sentiments. i’m having problem with my in laws… a brother and a sister in law to be exact. my husband and me live in their house (kaya kasama namin ang brother in law ko sa house) along with our baby and yaya. He’s older than me but he calls me “ate”, he’s a very ill-tempered person although sometimes i feel that namamlastik lang sya ng pakikitungo sa akin kasi nga i’m the wife of his kuya, there are times na he invite me to eat kapag nadadatnan ko syang kumakain or he would acknowledge my presence and sometimes he totally ignore me. It’s okey with me pero kasi my time na sobrang ignore nya ako at pati ang anak kong 2years old ay dinadamay nyang hindi pansinin. I don’t remember anything na ginawa ko or sinabing masama that might have offended him. Pero oftentimes than not, parang wala siyang respeto sa akin. my sister in law on the other hand doesn’t live with us but her two (2) kids (13 girl and 10 boy) stays with us every weekend although during vacation (either summer or christmas vacation) they go to our place. These two kids bugged kasi bata pa lang sila plastic na, (sorry for the term… i just don’t know kung anong term ang mas appropriate…) They were only nice and give respect to me (kiss me on the cheek or mag-mamano) in the presence of my husband or their parents kapag wala sila deadma ako… i could live with it kaya lang pati ang pakikitungo nila sa anak ko pinaplastic din nila. I learned from the yaya na pinagdadamutan nila ang bata, they would even tease her with food and let her watch them eat their food dahil kanila yun. In short kung ano ang food sa bahay sa aming lahat kung sila ang bumili kanila lang. Their mom is also mataray pero i could deal with her, kasi the think pinaplastik ko sila sa pakikitungo ko but GOD knows i’m trying my best to be sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo patient with them… there are alot of things (bad things) that had happened between me and my in laws pero napatawad ko na sila ngayon kaya lang right now pati ang anak ko dinadamay nila… what can a 2 year old kid can do against them. Kung ako lang kaya kong ihandle but hindi ko kayang makitang pati ang anak ko dinadamay nila sa inis nila sa akin… Much as i want to live separately from them but my husband and my salary are not enough so we just stay with them… i still have alot of stories about their “pakikipag-plastikan” with me and my child. Pero like most of us who write here, we are lifting it to GOD! i know that HE is giving me the gift of patience… i’m a very patient person but lately i can’t stand knowing how they treat my child. It’s so unfair kasi wala syang laban… i don’t want her to grow up “madamot” like her cousin but it’s not impossible because she could see them and even hears them saying “bad words” like buwisit and S_ _ T! She would utter these words na din without knowing the meaning of the word. For three years I’ve been praying for them… even lifting them to the LORD that HE may bless them and touch their hearts… i always cry to GOD everyday to help me, to understand and be more patient with them… but i don’t know until when i could hold on… HELP!!! thank you and GODBless!!!

  117. Hmm..

    I guess the gifts that we receive from these “difficult people” are actually the things we are praying for.

    I remember in the movie Evan Almighty, Morgan Freeman, the actor who played God said something like “When we pray for patience, what we get are situations where our patience is being challenged. ”

    We don’t directly get things we prayed for, but what we get are the opportunities where we can learn how to acquire those gifts.

  118. a lot has submitted their replies, which really means, there are hell lot of difficult people on earth… haha!

    well..let me first say hi to Brother Bo, to all the staff of this incredible site and to all readers…

    this comment may not even have the chance to be read by many, coz as i have said,,, there are super duper mega over alot of stories submitted in here, but i decided to take the shot. hoping that there would be others there like me, or others who would understand… and somehow realize that really, these difficult persons make us stronger, more human and most of all, pray to God more and more.

    well, i wouldnt like to shock u all, but….

    It’s my mom… my loving mom…

    She is the hardest working mom in the whole wide world, not to mention witty and possessing a strong personality… but in the past couple of years, we have been burdened by internal family issues, growing financial needs and some other tests of life… this had caused her to be mentally and physically stressed out with work, financial obligations and maternal responsibilities. She is suffering from high blood pressure and some other minor (i hope) abnormalities in her body caused by overworking.

    Dont get me wrong, i love her. I really do…

    But we people arent created perfect. I wish we were though…

    She’s not a mean mom or anything but she’s a PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE to our family. I understand that she’s trying to give the best to us and tries to protect us from the world… but her ways are simply beyond normal and nobody seems to understand her conclusions on things. I cant even fight back, considering the culture that we have…i tried to fight back once, unluckily i was just tried by publicity and convicted guilty.

    She easily gets angry… and oh my… you wouldn’t wanna make her angry, coz if u do,,, her words will strike u in the heart like lighting from the sky. She’s a living example of the saying “words are mightier than swords”.

    I think that a lot of children out there have problems with their parents too,, so if you do, i think u basically understand my abstract description.

    i wish i could explain any further, but i just cant, no words are coming out of me and my mind just gave up to tell you guys the whole picture… i think that writing this one is really tough specially that i am referring to my own mom.

    For nearly 4 years i hated her like s**t, honestly speaking. Everything changed when i moved here abroad, 2 years ago, to work and to distance my self from her before the hurt i feel inside could lead to anything more destructive like suicide. See that??? i distanced my self from her and from all the people i love…my brothers, my father, my boyfriend, my friends….. a sacrifice i did so that i can live longer…. Everyday for that 4 years, i prayed like no one else ever prayed for God to erase the anger, the pain and the bitternerss i have for her. … and i prayed that God would just give me a miracle to change my mom the way i like her to be; gentle, understanding and careful with decisions and words…. but then God has other plans maybe….

    fortunately, i improved a lot within these 2 years im away from them and i guess i have matured a lot over the 2 years i have been working for my own survival. the anger less and less visited me…well… it visits me still but i can already manage i suppose. Now i dont pray anymore for the anger to go away,,, i know, it already is being washed away……..

    if you wanna know wether my mom knows i hate her.. well, she does… we had quite a big fight a week before i left philippines ( 2 years ago)…

    now i just pray for my mom’s health and i wish that God may give her longer life because also in this 2 years that i am away from her, i realized how important she is to me and how much i love her…. I think she changed slightly, for the better… and i am also contemplating on how i should have dealt with my anger towards her before coz… my goodness, she’s my mom…..

    to all the people out there who feel hatred toward a “”difficult”" family member, specially a parent… i suggest, you do something constructive to ease the pain,,, like me…i worked abroad, i am proud to say that that is constructive, i earn money, i mature and at the same time i heal…..((well,,, sadly not yet totally healed,,, but im working my way on it, and eventually, God knows when,,, im gonna be one gogillion percent out of this emotional war i have towards my mom)))

    i told you, dont get me wrong….i love her… i really really do……

    maybe next year, if God permits me to, i’ll be joining her and my family in the united states…pray for me y’ all…..

  119. Yes we have a very difficult person in our community who always tried to convince others to side him and go against the leader in our community. He wanted to be look up by everybody but sad to say we don’t like his ways. The worst thing is that I have to pass by his house in going to work, to church or whenever I go out. So i prayed hard to God to tone down my pride so that I could greet him whenever he is around when I pass by. God heard my prayer and I’m not angry anymore when I met him. I accepted him that, thats his role in life.

    For he is the cause of the break up of our community and now I’m still praying that we can be reunited soon through help of God. Please pray for our community.

  120. like the others, i also have a difficult person in my life at siya’y walang iba kundi ang bro-in-law kong SOBRANG YABANG!!!! just merely thinking of him draws my blood to boil. grabe ang kayabangan ng taong ito. feeling nya righteous siya at ang pamilya nya just because they belong to this certain kind of religiuos group. and one thing that really irritates me is the way he tries to discipline our children. duh?! i-bypass daw ba ang pagiging magulang ko? it’s not that i don’t want him to meddle w/ our family but it’s the way he does it. naturingang religious (sabi n’ya) pero nakikipagmataasan sya.

    i just pray that i’d be numb to totally be able to ignore him. haay, Lord! please help me.

  121. It seems to me that most of the “difficult” persons in our lives come mainly from two places: Office and Home. Two places we spend most of our times in,
    and palces we thought we are in the company of people who love and understand (home) us the most and where our talents and skills (office) are supposed to be honed and appreciated.
    It’s really hard to live each day knowing there are people who make our lives miserable… I, myself, am having a very hard time at work for about a year now because of mean superiors who only think about their personal gains at the expense of others. . .
    But I think God sends these people to remind us that He is bigger than anyone. In fact he is the biggest and the most powerful person in the whole universe. And no matter how cruel our bosses and some of our family members are, God is still a lot, lot, lot Bigger and powerful than any of them.
    So we need to surrender everything to HIM and in His time we will find the happiness and peace we all deserve to have.
    Let’s all pray for each other.
    Thanks and God Bless you Bro. Bo.

  122. I laughed out loud when I saw the title of this post.

    My mother-in-law is currently the most difficult person in my life, maybe followed closely by my husband :)

    We’ve been living with my in-laws for 9 years. I figured early on that my mother-in-law has a major obsessive-compulsive disorder, a gigantic inferiority complex, and probably schizophrenic. Because I understand that she cannot help what she is, I simply adjusted and learned the ways and means of living a peaceful co-existence. But here’s my current problem:

    I have a 2 year-old son and she’s driving all my yayas away with her convoluted rules and unfair accusations! My son is suffering, my work is suffering, and my health is affected. I want out! The solution is quite simple - we have to move out because I have to consider my son’s well-being first.

    That’s where my difficult person #2 comes into the picture. My hubby and I get along very well and I love him to bits. But his reaction to any problem is to focus just on the negative aspects and so never arrive at any solutions. He gets depressed. He gets stressed. And he says I’m putting more pressure on him by insisting we make a decision to move out. His comfort zone is very small and any major decision paralyzes him. I, on the other hand, always look for a solution and am very impatient to carry them out! Aaaargghh!!!!

    My yayas never stay for more than 3 weeks. I worry that the instability will affect my son so I take care of him as much as possible, which compromises my work. It’s so tiring.

    My husband is a blessing. So is my son. Having a house to go home to without having to pay rent is a great blessing. But I’m ready to move on, and I hope that God will provide a way.

  123. well, maybe nothing can compare to the most difficult person in my life, that is my younger brother.

    all of the description that was on the list above fits my brother, selfish, possesive, constantly angry, annoying etc. sometimes i think God really made a human being closer enough to turn my good day into a bad one.

    i tried talking it over to him a lot. He doesnt listen to my explanations and it turned out that he was the one giving me the sermon instead of me giving it to him.

    he hates me whenever i have some achievement. whenever i talked about it in the family about what i received in school, and now at work, he really locked the door of his room,blag! and doesnt wanna hear my stories.

    before we used to fight a lot, but i got really tired of him, plus the fact that i don’t feel it was worth arguing with him. until i realized that i became more patient and strong because of him. i became more resilient and maybe he is wondering why im not the way i am now compared to what i was before towards him.

    but somehow, i pity him. because as i grow, he’s not. he blame others because of what he is now. which is wrong. i hope one day God will be on his side too. i hope one day he would feel the Love of God for him. i can only do so much to make him realize that God loves him and he can change his life and perspective in life. I think one way of expressing his loneliness is through anger. but i think thats a wasteful emotion. He should know that he is also responsible of taking care of his soul. there has been lots of hurtful things he did to me but this time, i wont allow him anymore.

    I pray to God he will be renewed in spirits.

  124. To ariane, who said,

    “A Difficult person in my life. Yes unluckily husband k o yun. Just last night nag away kami, i had discovered a text message from a girl, na alam kong babae niya and naka imply na ngkikita sila…. Since nagkaroon kami ng big problem, dun nagstart ang pagiging mainitin ang ulo niya, naninigaw, nagmumura, but i still accept him coz i love him and also for my 2 kids. But just the other night he abused me physically i cried all night. But pinatwad ko din siya.”

    Please know that it’s not being “Christian” or “loving” by allowing another person, even if he’s your husband, to abuse you in any way. Bo would always teach that having healthy boundaries is part of loving ourselves. And we cannot love others correctly unless we first learn to love ourselves. If your husband abuses you, let him know in no uncertain terms that if he doesn’t stop, you will leave him and take your kids with you until he shows remorse and he changes. You will also do your two kids much good by showing them that it is unacceptable behavior for someone to abuse another person, especially since it’s their dad who is beating up their mom. Please seek counsel and call our Light of Jesus Counseling hotline 725-9999 so you can get the strength and enlightenment you need. God bless you!

  125. What gifts i have received through difficult people:

    1.)the ability to love more.

    2.)to accept people as they are. because God loves all.

    3.)oppurtunity to grow more like Jesus.

    4.)to become more patient

    5.)the oppurtunity to apply the wisdoms that i have received.

    6.) i learned that nothing beats love. Because love is like water flowing upon rock, and the hardest of rocks will slowly crack open over time.

    7.) the chance to change for the better, if i am not able to control the situation.

    I hope this helps others.
    Godbless! =)

    Gabby

  126. with these difficult people in my life, I learn to become more patient and more cool especially in difficult circumstances like someone had gone mad in front of you- like putting me into shame in front of other people…. I thank God for giving me the grace to stay cool and did not retaliate that offensive act of my co-worker…

  127. i learned that difficult persons are only difficult if you think they are…i have encountered a lot in the past and even in the present…when i feel their indifference i feel irritated but later on i will analyze the situation and then i begin to understand them…im trying to look at their positive or good attitude and not on their weaknesses so that i will feel peace in my heart…all of us have our own strengths and weaknesses…we just have to accept the weaknesses of the people around us…sometimes these people have experienced past hurts and indifference also, that made them the persons they are now, all they need is understanding and love…then later on we will realize that difficult persons are blessings from God…

    i know when i was younger i am difficult to others but as i grew older and become mature i realized that God has blessed me with so many things and that GRATITUDE towards HIM made me a better person…GOD’S TRUE LOVE FOR ME THAT I EXPERIENCED IN SO MANY WAYS HAS CHANGED ME AND MY LIFE…I AM NO MORE DIFFICULT BECAUSE I CHOSE NOW TO BE A BLESSING TO OTHERS…

    GOD IS GIVING US DIFFICULT PERSONS TO TEACH AND TEST US HOW MUCH WE LOVE HIM…

    HES GIVING US DIFFICULT PERSONS IN OUR LIVES TO GIVE US THE GIFT OF TRUE LOVE OR LOVING UNCONDITIONALLY…ITS UP TO US IF WE WILL ACCEPT IT OR NOT…

    I DO BELIEVE THAT TRUE LOVE AND SINCERE PRAYERS CAN CHANGE A PERSONS LIFE AND ATTITUDE…LETS JUST CONTINUE PRAYING FOR THEM…

    Thanks Bo, you have been an inspiration to me…

    GOD BLESS!

    Ellea

  128. Well, this difficult person is my husband. We got married last 2005 and from the start of our marriage he is already showing infidelity. I did many things to stop him from doing that.In other words, I tried so hard to save the marriage. After two years, I lost the game. I didn’t take it anymore so I left him. We have a two-year old child. Yes, he is such an irresponsible father and husband. It makes me sad knowing that I did everything to make him happy but then still, I failed…..Well, perhaps not really everything…. I did so many novenas asking the saints to help me touch the heart of this person…I guess, even the saints are having difficult time….We still see each other but it seems he’s not affected of what’s happening…. He even doesn’t have plan to reconcile and come back to us…..
    On the hand, I still want to thank the Lord, because they took my husband but not my precious angel (my child), they took my dream (to have a complete family) but not my faith. I am still lucky I guess….

    May the Lord bless my husband and his mistress!

  129. hi bro bo!

    well, i’m one of those people who have this “difficult persons” in life. hindi ako nawawalan ng mga ganitong taong nae-encounter, in short, someone is always there to challenge my patience, hehehe…before joining my community, i was really so much affected by this people, but now i learned to pray for them and pray for the way i should handle those people…i also ask the Holy Spirit to bless and guide me in everyway…i also ask Jesus to increase my patience, heheh, ung patience na kasing-haba ng presensya nila sa buhay ko, hehehe….God has given me the “serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can”, and most of all, “the wisdom to know the difference”….these difficult people in my life, i have learned to offer to Jesus (in good faith, hehhe)…because through them, marami din akong nabago sa sarili ko….God has used these people for a better me…..God bless everyone! thank you also bro. bo!

  130. i have a live-in partner who is so stubborn and irresponsible. i was contented with our state. that i would be the one working and he would be the one taking care of our children. and then the Lord shook me and bring me back to my senses. our maid left because my husband was hitting on her. i was angry at myself for letting it happen and for not doing anything or pushing him to work for our sake. he learned his lesson and asked for my forgiveness. i forgave him and gave him another chance.

    sometimes God uses difficult people to be an instrument, inorder to awaken us and say that everything is not alright and that i need to stand up for myself.

    but then people are good in nature. and that someday i know that if you give them another chance they will change for the better. if God forgave us for the many times we have sinned, i think we should give back by forgiving others in return. however difficult they maybe. as the Lord says, “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you; that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven”

  131. Difficult people are part of everybody’s life. If I don’t like difficult people what I do is ignore them, Kunwari they don’t exsist pero kung kulang na lang sampalin ka well maybe patience, thought, Im really having difficulties being patient with them, sometimes I really really like to twist their neck hehehehe. As my friend said pag wala sila boring ang life natin. So I guess We have no choice but to deal with them. Pag di mo na kaya pray na lang kay lord para kunin na sila. =)

  132. Dear Bo,

    I have the same experience. I have a difficult person in my life.
    What should I do?

  133. I’m so blessed with this article as right now my husband and I have been & is still experiencing THREE VERY DIFFICULT persons in our lives. Yes, THREE as in 3. First 2 is in the form of a mother & son tandem.

    First, they want me to go to Manila, secondly, they booked me in a motel near their place instead of my usual place in Makati, third, they don’t come at our appointed time but made me wait for 3-4 hours, 4th, they want me to bring original proofs of our own personal investments, 5th, they asked me to bring them “pasalubong”.

    6th, they forced me to buy jewelries from them after our business transaction, telling me that aside from that, I should buy a piece for her, too, as a gift, 7th, they didn’t allow me to fly back as they insisted I should treat them for dinner & they want me to facilitate another business transaction, 8th, they are not paying for my airline ticket, rebooking, and hotel expenses.

    9th, and you thought it’s over? hahaha! 9th, they made me miss my flight by coming 2hrs late for our appointed time, 10th, after finding out I was stranded, they insisted I see them again for further explanation, as if I have not explained enough for the nth time, 11th, they pulled out some of the business transactions without any ado, 12th, they are demanding for 50% of the commission from the remaining sales, as they said; “it is their right and it is God’s command to share our blessings”

    They are calling us a lot of names, f—–g swindlers, M—–F—–rs, that greedy sl_t of a wife etc. Even if we will share the commission which we haven’t received, what assurance do we have that they won’t pull out the remaining business transactions after getting money from us?

    Hit and Run daw kami even if we have been courteously answering their text and calls.

    The 3rd person, is a PhD holder and a faculty member in one of the international schools in Makati, he got angry with us because he doesn’t want us to take out w/holding tax from his pay and he is not happy with that.

    I’m a very patient person, but we all have our limitations. The gifts I guess that I got from all these experiences? Well, I would say the gift of more tolerance and forgiveness. I pray for these people, oh, yes, I have bad thoughts, too. I’m, after all only human, like Bro. Bo. I believe God is pruning me in these areas and would like me to grow more. Altho, I still can’t comprehend why these people who claims to be God-fearing and christians, can do such a thing to a fellow child of God, but I am surrendering them to the Lord. As long as my conscience is clear, I have nothing to fear. As He said, vengeance is mine and not yours to give.

    Another gift would be to really and completely trust Him and surrender to Him without question.

    Bro. Bo, this article is very timely indeed, for I feel so depressed and frustrated. I am so uplifted to know human ka din pala, I must have thought of you a superbeing hehehe!!!

    Thank you very much! God Bless You & Your Family!

  134. yes Bro Bo, there is one most difficult person in my life, it’s mu husband. since we live here in the US, life is just totally different…culture, surroundings, people, lifestyle….etc. these are all bearable if my husband who is an american will contribute in making this place a better place. but no… he is too lazy to drive me or us around (with my 3 kids). so i learned to drive independently. yes i agree with you that God has His purpose and reasons. But the situation late is sometimes unbearable….. he domesticated everybody in the family. Yes we have a big house, 5 bedroom and 5 baths, but he lives like a pig that I go crazy when it’s time for me to clean the house. Yes we have 8 acre place where I was glad at first because the kids have a big space to play, but no. He plated him 300 some trees and 300 some roses that he said its for “me”….. so that I don’t have to buyt the expensive ones at Walmart. But no! he force our youngest son to help him with trimming and fertilizing the fruit trees. And my 2 daughters have to spent an hour and a half watering the and fertilizing the roses, to the extent that the kids can’t play after they do their homework. Yes we have a pool but we won’t have time hardly time to go swimming because he wanted us to work outside. He even complain when we went home from church late because we have sunday class after mass. Sometimes, yes I do ask God why?

  135. hi. i got one difficult person in my life when i was a teen ager, who later on i realized was a best friend, guide and helper all along.

    i didn’t know she was all that till i grew matured and looked back to my teen age years. if she had allowed me to do what i wanted then,which i thought was my right and privilege, i would be in a harder situation now. had she not been “difficult” to me, i could have made wrong moves and decisions.

    i wanted to give up on her then, but now i appreciate the way she were and the things she did. and until now were close. i do not tell her, but i consider her one of my best friends.

    God is good, always. the difficult person He sends could be an “angel” to guide us.

  136. Dear Bo,
    What I have learned thru God’s grace in dealing with difficult people is….. first and for most accepting the fact that it is I,ME mwa…. has a problem in coping with them. In realizing this, I run to the Lord and ask Him for strength and guidance knowing that on my own it is almost impossible to deal with this without sinning (wishing the person more harm than what I am experincing or something of that sort) and suffering.We always have the choice how to react.

  137. i got one difficult person in my life ( and he’s still “testing” me sometimes til now, till i finally blocked him off my messengers) - my ex. We broke up coz he chose to be with another girl whose closer. And what made it difficult is that, he still kept on saying good things to me..which made me confused..to move on or hmmm move on!! of course it made me bitter for sometime ( made me thinner and i got a lot of absences at work grrr) until a friend shared to me a book of Joshua Harris ” Boy Meets Girl”. I dunno if my friend did it intentionally but thanks to her. It made me open my eyes.

    I have been NOt in a relationship for “48 years” already, last one was 2001. And when he arrived last year, it was like Bang! then he’s gone, like Bang! too :(

    My point is that, for me if this difficult person my life hadnt arrived (and left) my view about realtionships wouldve still be like before. from the book Boy Meets Girl it says something like “making a relationship like your god”. I worshipped that relationship which is wrong. Now i am single and more happy again. Somehow difficult persons are eye openers God gave us. He cant come here to personally tell us, but His ways are our ways, right?

    God Bless you, Bo :)

    PS.
    I also have some of your books at home..
    :)

  138. i got one difficult person in my life ( and he’s still “testing” me sometimes til now, till i finally blocked him off my messengers) - my ex. We broke up coz he chose to be with another girl whose closer. And what made it difficult is that, he still kept on saying good things to me..which made me confused..to move on or hmmm move on!! of course it made me bitter for sometime ( made me thinner and i got a lot of absences at work grrr) until a friend shared to me a book of Joshua Harris ” Boy Meets Girl”. I dunno if my friend did it intentionally but thanks to her. It made me open my eyes.

    I have been NOt in a relationship for “48 years” already, last one was 2001. And when he arrived last year, it was like Bang! then he’s gone, like Bang! too :(

    My point is that, for me if this difficult person my life hadnt arrived (and left) my view about realtionships wouldve still be like before. from the book Boy Meets Girl it says something like “making a relationship like your god”. I worshipped that relationship which is wrong. Now i am single and more happy again. Somehow difficult persons are eye openers God gave us. He cant come here to personally tell us, but His ways are NOT our ways, right?

    God Bless you, Bo :)

    PS.
    I also have some of your books at home..
    :)

  139. one of the difficult persons in my life is my professor.
    arrrgg.. she had done many annoying things to me. grrr! she’s so masungit!she’s unjust.
    i cried a lot of times because of her(not just me, even half of the class). she brought pain in my heart. haaay.. when she’s around, my heart is filled of terror.
    *nahihirapan akong huminga*..she even humiliated me in front of my classmates..haaay..
    but one day, i saw this professor smiling at me, mingling with us(my classmates). sumabay pa umuwi sa min. shocking db? alam mo yun. medyo nalusaw un impression ko sa kanya(pero nandun pa rin e).
    days have passed, i realized that my professor is not terror at all,(just slight). maybe she’s a monster whenever we’re inside the classroom, and when we are outside the classroom,
    a drastic transformation will occur.from being a MONSTER she will become a MOM to us.(she wants us to attend her seminars for frEE!)she wants to intensely enrich our knowledge.
    siguro, ginagawa niya lang maging terror para ma-force kaming magsipag sa pagaaral kasi minsan pag wala kang takot or sindak na nadadama hindi ka kikilos?right?(lalo na sa panahon ngayon namin mga kabataan)
    and now, i consider her as a motivating force.. dahil sa kanya, nachachallenge ako to become a better student!and because of her i always feel that i’m a daughter of God. why? because I always forgive her whenever she does mean things to me.
    so I therefore conclude that DIFFICULT PERSONS HAVE A PURPOSE IN OUR LIVES. GOD DESIGN THEM TO TEACH US VALUABLE LESSONS IN LIFE!
    BECAUSE OF THEM, WE CAN REALIZE THAT EVEN THEY’RE DOING BAD THINGS TO US, WE US A CHILD OF GOD MUST DO THE GOOD THINGS WE ARE SUPPOSED TO DO. IF THAT IS THEIR NATURE THEN BE IT, DONT LET THEM CONTROL YOU(YOU WILL JUST LET THEM WIN IF THEY CAN CHANGE YOUR GOOD MOODS)
    PRAY FOR THEM. IT REALLY WORKS! “more prayer..more Power!
    little prayer…little power!
    no prayer..no power!” thank you Tito BO. You’re such a gift of love from God. God bless=)

  140. i have one, my sister. she is a single mom with two kids. the problem started when she started having boyfriend again. she neglects her kids just to be with her bf.oftentimes the kids would tell us they haven’t eaten yet because their mom left, and that they were often left alone at night when their mom is with her bf. it came to the point when she spent the family business’ earnings on the guy and now we’re the ones left to pay her debts.
    when i confronted her, she got so mad and started shouting saying she’s going to kill me,she even tried to stab me with a pair of scissors. it wasn’t the only time she became physically abusive. i told our father i want to leave the house when i couldn’t take it anymore but he just told me to ignore her.
    i tried talking to her at first but we always end up fighting. so now i just ignore her. but i can’t help but worry about her kids.

  141. Hi Bo!

    About what you wrote, well, I have a very difficult boss who’s rude, insulting, and insensitive. I really like the job and the people I’m with, but unfortunately, she’s part of the package. Your article got me into thinking what gift I developed during the time I have spent working for her. Unfortunately, I can;t think of any. I don’t think God– who has been really good to me– gave me my boss. I got my boss simply because I have been unlucky.

    After three years, I have finally decided to resign. I’m in the process of looking for a job. One more month with her and I might suffer a nervous breakdown. I am a strong person, but I refuse to waste my time with a boss who doesn’t respect and appreciate her employees. Without us, she wouldn’t get a monthly six figure salary. I refuse to make a monster rich off my suffering.

    Some people are difficult just because they choose to be difficult. Some have hang ups because they suffered a violent and sad childhood. Some because they are stuck in pathetic relationships. But many are difficult because they want to– because of greed for money, ambition, and recognition. We don’t have to try to understand their motivations. The best way to deal with them is simply to leave them.

  142. im an OFW and i have this pseudo boss.. partly why he may be a difficult being in my life is because we have different nationalities. Ok, i am trying to understand him as well. But every single email or conversation has to be a big deal for him. Even a simple question of why did you courier 3000php worth of flyers to UK, can turn into a (to calmly put it) hulla-balu! When I can really justify these small matters. When I was staying that property, every single day I get drained because his room is just a few steps away from mine, his voice is so loud I think he would be doing a “sermon” to everyone he talks to. Even though i hardly get to have an encounter with him, I think he just drains the energy in me. Now, that I am sort off far away from him, I thought I can like escape him already. Well sort off, sometimes. Now, I take him as God’s wake up call for me to go back to Phils. Everyday, I would think of staying in this company then in the afternoon, I would get an “encounter” with him. He serves as this little reminder that I don’t deserve this and God has a better and greater plan for me.

  143. i think we are given difficult people so the fruits of the Spirit will truly shine: love, peace, fortitude, long suffering etc… its like practicum/field work that God allows so these virtues in us will truly come out. and if we succeed, it will give Him greater glory.

    this is such a timely email/topic for me. God works in mysterious ways, for i have recently flunked the test on dealing with my difficult person at work. i entrust myself to His mercies that all this will be corrected and i get it right this time around.

    Godbless you more bro and your ministry!

  144. They give us opportunities to practice patience, love, understanding, etc.

  145. There’s this couple who happened to be my daughter’ godparents,who became sick head individuals who spread gossips against us all over the Filipino Community. It all started when I told my husband about all his insulting remarks (For him it was all jokes). He wants us to give our son to him for a secure future because he claimed himself to be super rich, but can’t have children and many other insults that I couldn’t ignore anymore) He can’t take that I told my husband all about it. That’s why the fear of what might be the Filipinos reaction. He instead sprea gossips against us and even those secrets that’s between me and them only. Because they already assumed that I tell the people what they did to us, so they’re kinda making some damage control. They didn’t know that when we told them we’re offended with theire jokes, we didn’t tell anybody. Now, they’re telling the people that they’re willing to say sorry but it won’t gonna work anymore because I want them completely out of our lives. WEll they keep on saying their sorry to other people only but they didn’t make any actions. They’re just full of pretentions.What I learned from all of these, is not to trust anybody anymore wholeheartedly and it’s easy for me to do that now.

  146. Hello!
    One of the difficult person in my life is sadly, my husband.He is responsible,mature,kind and very forgiving.My friends told me I`m lucky to be his wife, but they are all wrong.
    I`ve been trying to keep the marriage for 10 years,coz i dont want my kids to experience a broken family but sometimes i really want to call it quits.
    He lets me decide on things alone,so when things does not work accordingly,all the blame will be on me.He dont want me to learn,he tried to hide me from the world.He boxed me in our house for a long time, no friends, no life.It`s no big deal for me then, because nobody will take care of my twins,except me.
    On several occasion,when we are invited in some parties in his office, we will not attend for a lot of reasons and sometimes in the mall and we see some of his officemates,he will not introduce me to them.Then i realized that he is ashamed of me being a housewife,that i looked like a yaya of our kids.That i dont look pretty like his co-engineers.It really hurts.
    One time i found out that he is going out with an ex,i fainted,it`s clear that he treated me that way because he truly doesnt love me.He just married me,i am his wife, but he dont love me.
    I love my kids so much and i want them to grow happy,i dont want them to grow with pains in their hearts,that`s why i`m always praying for strength,for wisdom and peace in my heart and mind.

  147. I have a neighbor who just love throwing her garbage at the gates of her neighbors. Several times, we complained about it even in court but the more she did overtime to put us in misery. When you wake up in the morning, you’ll see the smelly garbage all over your front yard while her yard is immaculately kept clean. She does it through her maids and when everybody is asleep. And she has been doing this for almost 40 years now. Yes, I pray for her much often than I pray for my best friend and we even invited her whole family for dinner in several occasions to no avail. I thank God for her, though. I have a chance practicing His command: Love your enemy.

  148. it’s god’s one wY OF TYESTING OUR PATIENT..it was really hard to live wih a difficult person with us..the daughter of my husbands cousin lives with us bec. she will be stdying here in manila on the first day she made an impreesion na pasaway siya..bec. she felt that whatever privilage my daughters has kelangan ganun din siya…hindi sya mahiyain…malakas kumain..walang kusa na gumawa sa gawaing bahay..addict sa text…hindi nya alam ang salitang pakikisama…nahihirapan ako kasi even my daughters naiinis sa kanya..it was really hard bec.. i felt na nagkakasala ako..am i being judgemental? i always ask god for forgivreness dahil nagiging makasalanan ako the way i treated her but i cant help it…mabigat talaga loob ko sa kanya…

  149. hindi pala ako nag-iisa, even bro. bo has his pasaway peeps. in my solitude, i always try to do a self-evaluation when it comes to my way of dealing with other people. every time i will remember what my husband told me, i always find myself contradicting it. he will usually say, mahirap daw akong intindihin at pakisamahan, masyado daw akong idealist and perfectionist. i disagree, ’cause even he’s my husband, i know myself better. once, i was really opposing my mom with regards to her way of getting so attached with her amigas, OA kasi, so eventhough i appeared to be as the kontrabida, i insisted her my points. we even came to the point where she told me that i’m just her daughter and i don’t have the rights to tell her what to do and not. i was hurt, syempre, pero with that, i decided to stop acting like her mom who tells her what’s the right from wrong and yung OA sa tama lang. i tried praying and God really works, one day she came to me telling me na tama nga ako. i’m happy now living with her. i told her that everything must be done in moderation.

    anyway, she’s not the most difficult person in my life naman. it’s my ate. i feel burdened by her because i care abt her and her family. my ate’s way of thinking is so different. with that, her family’s the one who are suffering a lot. there’s nothing wrong with my sister other than her being close-minded. she finds it hard to accept suggestions, kahit na sa ikagaganda ng buhay nya. she’s the eldest but with the way she handles her life, parang sya ang youngest (that’s me, we are 6 girls in the family). my ate cannot figure out how to be financially independent. her problems are routinary. money. everybody in our family helped her already in different ways. worst, everyone seems to give up and finally decided not to help her financially anymore. in my case, burden ito na no one wants to help her anymore kasi i’m more concerned with my pamangkins. sila ang mas kawawa. but i know na our decision not to help her anymore is the best kasi hindi sya matututo talaga, or hindi sya mag e effort talaga kung laging may magbibigay sa kanya. even in the Bible, someone says, don’t give them a fish, teach them to be a fishermen. i know God knows the desire of my heart even before i typed down these words. i also know and heard a lot of times that God’s delays aren’t God’s denials, mangungulit lang ako, sana it will not be too late, anyway i know God knows the perfect timing for everything. kahit ganun ang ate ko, i sincerely love her, and i hope she will discover her strength so she’ll be able to support her family esp the kids.

    bro. bo difficulties are here to make us a better person, it might sound superficial but it’s already tested. i guess God created things that way. mas maige ang pagkatuto kung nalaman mo ito ng may kasamang pagsubok, kaya nga experience is the best teacher. there might be a lot of self-help books around, but those will not make us stronger physically, mentally, emotionally, and most of all spiritually, sana nga lang, wag naman masyadong mahirap, hehe, pero come to think of it, i guess, again, God intends to give us difficulties, in any shape or form for us to remember Him, and for us to continue seek His wisdom, kasi aminin natin madalas tayong makalimot pag OK ang lahat, i guess, again, that’s His way of making lambing to all of us, sending us pasaways…

    God bless to us all ^^

    xoxo

  150. i have a friend who can be really difficult sometimes…she just have these depresing ang pessimistic times that can be annoying…it also sucks my energy…
    but then…it has also helped me know myself more.
    …..it made me realized how blessed i am…my problems are not half as heavy as hers.
    ….it made me realized that i am optimistic…and it is a gift! my friend has told me how my bubbly personality makes her feel better and reminds her of the many reasons she has to be happy and to think positive… wow! i never knew i had that power before…now i want to sprinkle some happiness on anyone i meet.

    and there is another difficult but not that difficult person in my life…but still can be annoying…

    …he made me see and understand another side of the world i never really cared to notice before. and how much i have learned from that!
    …he also made me realized that I can’t change anyone if that person does not want to change; that i can’t help anyone if that person does not help himself first… but that does not stop me from loving him as a friend.

    yes, i also believe that God allows difficult people in our lives to give us gifts…
    and for me… one gift would be ….the gift of knowledge/wisdom.
    difficult people helps us learn things about ourselves, other people, and the world in general. : )

  151. yes… he’s my college bestfriend… he broke my heart… but i know God has GREATER plans for me. God loves me so much that He wants a better person for me… I think God planned for that to happen because He will give me far more greater than what i had… I trust God on this!

    I live for Him alone! :-D

  152. hi bro. bo,

    i have this difficult person in my life, i have a small RTW store, this person was so selfish, halos wla pki khit mtakpan n nya ang katabi nyang store na khit yta s sidewlak n eh sinakop n mailabs lng lhat ng paninda nya. pag sya nman natatakpan ng katabi nya ay nagwawala s galit di n nga ko nag cocomplain s ginagawa nila sobra na sipsip nila s may ari ewan ba bkt gnun cla. tpos cla pa may ganang magreklamo parati. hay nku sbi ko nga knina pag pray ko n lng tong mga ganitong tao. n khit wla k ginagawa msama s knila eh iba nsa isip. bro. Bo pls. pray for me na humaba ang pasncya ko ayaw ko may kaaway mabigat s dibdib lalo n iisa lng lugar nmin.

    May the LORD straighten my patient to this person.

    GOD bless

    thank you so much

  153. To nina,

    I feel very sorry for you but at the same time I admire your courage and your great love for your family. I am in similar situation myself.

    I worked away from home and had recently found out that my wife is having an affair with an officemate. Though the third party already left their company I feel that their relationship still persists.

    Our marriage has never been the same again. We have a three year old daughter and I worry for her. And I feel so helpless seeing our relationship deteriorate and I fear for my daughter who would probably grow up with a less than ideal upbringing. I have grown up in a very religious and happy family though we were not well of.

    Lately, I have had to sleep in another room and not with my wife as her family think it “best” for us (my wife and my daughter lives with her parents). It really broke my heart. I am on the verge of giving up on this marriage myself. I want to move on and forget all the heartaches. But I cannot give up on my daughter. What kind of example will I give her if I too will consent to her mother’s wish to end our marriage?

    I pray to the Lord to help keep me focused on the brighter things in life but it always seem like a daily struggle with no end in sight.

    I find comfort in the knowing that I am not alone after all. Know that you we are never alone. God’s grace will be more than sufficient. Rest assured of my prayers for your family and others like ours. God bless.

  154. i believe that all difficult people can really come from anywhere. maybe God has assigned one for everyone to teach us something. it could be a lifetime lesson of patience or test of character. who knows, at some point, we have been that difficult person as well. anyway, in my journey as a missionary, i have met a lot of them even within the community. eventhough we have the same mission and vision, things can really get difficult. we get to the bottom of our hopes, but along the way, we get mixed up, maybe because of cultural differences or maybe because of personal differences. i cannot change them, i can only change me and the way i see things. indeed, the call to be a christian is difficult itself, because to be a christian is to love even the most difficult persons. besides, whoever said that love is a feeling? love is a decision. and to love them is also a decision.
    Praise God for you Bo!

  155. to: GIRL CONFIDING and MISS MOO NOI ( i hope i speeled your name correctly)

    I just want to share with you a poem by Russell Kelfer which i have read in Purpose Driven Life BOOK.

    You are who you are for a reason,
    You are part of the intricate plan.
    You’re a precious and perfect unique design,
    Called God’s special woman or man.

    You look like you look for a reason,
    Our God made no mistake.
    He knit you together within the womb,
    You’re just what He wanted to make.

    The parents you had were the ones He chose,
    And no matter how you feel,
    They were custom-designed with God’s plan in mind
    And they bear the Master’s seal.

    No, the trauma you faced was not easy,
    And God wept that it hurt you so;
    But it was allowed to shape your heart,
    So that into His likeness you’d grow.

    You are who you are for a reason,
    You’ve been formed by the Mster’s rod,
    You are who you are beloved,Because there is a GOD!!

    i could truly relate to your stories about the family members who were such hard to love and understand especially if u are molested verbally and sexually… when i read the book Purpse Driven Life it halped me somehow to understand that there is a purpose for evrything that is happening to us. God was thinking of us even before we were born and He chooses when and how we will be born and to whose family we will grow. he even choose our parents. God has a plan in creating us all. I will be paraying for you too and God Bless.

  156. Dear Bo,

    sa akin simple lang habang lumalapit sa akin ang difficult person na ito sa buhay ko, mas lumalapit din ako sa Diyos, hay ang sarap mabuhay malapit kay Lord and it’s all because of this difficult person.

    Ngayon, everyday ako nagsisimba, everyday I examined my conscience kung ganun ako kasama at nagre-reflect na pangit pala pag-ganun ang ugali mo…ang all good things come, when I started living it up to the Lord.

    It was never easy, in fact it was very very very difficult. This makes the journey towards my everyday heaven more interesting.

    Louie

  157. I was new at that place and having come from a loving family and a loving community I always have a ready smile for everybody. I have this concept that if I am good to others they would likewise be good to me but this did not apply to everyone. Never have I thought that I have to live with a difficult person. I have to see her everyday at work and have to practically live with her in one room. There were times she would not talk to me for a period of time. Not knowing what I did wrong that she would often slammed the door of our room when I am around. It was even difficult that we share the same set of friends and have to ride the company car with her to work everyday and have to eat lunch and dinner with her. Once I had a surge of courage and ask her if she was angry at me she just replied coldly and sternly ” iwasan mong mag-iingay sa loob ng kwarto lalo na ang tunog ng plastic wrapper”. So, I quickly offered my apology and explained that I was really unaware to which she never accepted (btw she was 5 years my senior that I expected that she could be more understanding). The cold treatment even worsened when she would insinuate false accusation against me. She would not mention my name while chatting in the car with our co-workers on the way to work but I know it is I that she meant, mahilig siyang magparinig. Like “hindi gaya ng iba dyan kuripot”, it was so unfair kasi noong una mabait siya sa akin and I even loaned her some money from my first salary and afterwards saka na lumabas ang totoo niyang kulay. It hurts kasi all the while akala ko totoo ang kabutihan na pinapakita niya sa akin yon pala may ulterior motive siya. The worst accusation was when she started insinuating that I might be having an affair with a married coworker in my department because I was the only female there. My world was filled with gloom knowing that someone hated me and any false move on my part can aggravate the situation. I suffered in silence not knowing whom to trust so far away from my family and community and knowing that my new found friends are hers as well. At night in the darkness of my room lying in an embryo position on my bed I would snuggle so tightly my blanket willing it to protect me knowing that not far from my own bed the enemy sleeps. I would often raise my hands and imagined God was holding me so tightly. I prayed and beg the Lord to take the cup away from me if He wills it. My comfort came from His words that poured like wellspring unto my spirit. He sends people to put a smile on my face and appease my broken spirit. One co-worker an Indian National visited me at my department once she asked me why the twinkle in my eyes were gone so unlike me when I first came. I only smiled but even with my silence she knew who’s making my life miserable. She hugged me and told me words of comfort. I prayed unceasingly to God to fix the strained relationship I have with my roommate because with my own strength I can’t. She had sown so much fear in my heart that I was so afraid she would yell and pounce on me anytime. I have already loose so much weight because eating with her around was torture. But the day came when God answered my prayer when she was hospitalized hurting her back accidentally. After several attempts to visit her at the hospital finally God gave me the courage to face her on the third day. Funny but some people who don’t even know of my strained relationship with my roommate just keep popping-up from nowhere and asking me if I had already visited my roommate. My roommate was so thankful when I finally came to visit. We reconciled after 6 months of cold war. From then on she became a good friend of mine. She is still the moody person that she is but I learned to live with that. That after all it pays to be good to others even when they cannot be good to you. God uses us in so many ways indeed to reach His people and to bring back the goodness in their heart. The heart, which may have been hardened by the people who refused to love them. And in facing difficult people just remember that our God is good all the time. So, why can’t we? God bless us everyone!

  158. Dear Bo,

    I was reading the replies to your blog entry/article on difficult people… I’m not yet done reading the long replies, but I’m already a bit depressed from all the horrible stuff other people can do! There is really so much need for us to be light of the world and salt of the earth. Based on all these, so far that’s one of the clearest things about difficult people or situations: (a) to push us to become better people (not to become like these “bad examples”, also based on my own experience of handling difficult people, I learned to make encounters with them as opportunities to love more; (b) to influence them the best way we can to know and love God and realize that WE’RE GOD’S SONS/ DAUGHTERS! (evangelize); (c) to push us to pray A LOT and thus make us holy (sometimes unintentionally), for difficult people and situations can sanctify us indeed– to all you who suffer so terribly, especially the wives! (My gosh, Bo, I am saddened because sometimes our brothers/sisters can be such martyrs… can I just say WAKE UP!?, oh, sorry, i meant CALL COUNSELING); So there, I was a tad depressed, but also upon reading other comments, I realized there are also so many good people in the world :) And you, my brothers and sisters, are like angels in this dark dark world, and you make things so much bearable and even beautiful, because you are other Christs to everyone. Thank you! You are kindling to that flame of hope that Christ put inside of us.

    Thank you again, Bo and your community. I guess difficult people are gifts in really bad wrapping. Sometimes we can help put a ribbon or something to make them bearable. Or maybe open them (tear them like crazy?! We wish :D ) and see the gift they truly are, and God will take care of re-wrapping them in the prettiest wrappers (and later on we’ll be proud that we chose this unexpectedly nice package). Oh, God’s re-wrapping me again and again, too, so I don’t really have a right to rant so much. :) God is just so great. Thanks again, Bo!

  159. I received this today…just when I spent the morning thinking awful thoughts of this difficult person and trying to justify my feeling and wishes to my community and saying things like “how can this person even know the name of Jesus…what a hypocrite…” and that’s like the least mean thing I thought of. My mind was just going on and on as I did my daily duties. Wishing this difficult person harm and sorrow and miserable situations. So when I opened your email on Do you have a Difficult Person in your life, how could I not read it. As you wrote, this person is a gift from God. A part of me still was thinking, sheesh…but the person in me called to holiness knows this to be true. This person is only difficult in my life because of my expectations; for again I place my ruler of judgement against this person and of course this person falls short. The decision to love this person, embodies the Eucharist: broken and blessed to be shared with the world. I write this because I need to remind myself. I am unable to do this love without God. But of course, only God gives the courage and strength to go beyond our own expectations, limitations, understanding, et.c etc. and love the other. Especially this difficult person. I am reminded again how I must pray to God to change me, that he touches my heart and opens me up to love this person.

  160. yes…i do have a few difficult persons in my life…but the latest is a niece of mine, a daughter of 4th, 5th 6th degree cousin am not sure really…but a relative still. my mom decided to take her to our house to be a yaya to my 2 yr. old nephew. she’s been here since last dec…we were planning to send her to school since she’s the eldest in her family so eventually she could help them out. it was ok at first but i just started noticing that she’s not following instructions, simple instructions even…just like segregation of laundry, cooking rice or the mere pagwawalis. i would give her instructions on how to do things and she would always tell me ( in a soft voice though) “tita, alam ko na yan…” so i just let her do it her way….but the thing is she would waste electricity, water and other resources because she simply doesnt listen…and when she’s being reprimanded she just walk away as if your not talking at all or just continue texting…i have talked to her calmly, angrily, tried to be a friend to her but nothing seems to get into her head. and she’s not even seem interested in studying. we have to make kulit to her to ask from her parents her school records so she could enroll this year it took her almost 5 mos. to get her papers, my mom already sent money for those…i would let her use the computer and she would chat often but i learned from my other pamangkins (who live nearby) that she would shut the door of my room (where the pc is) while she chats away…i told her that she could use it but wag abuso…there was one time that the it was already 8 in the evening and no dinner yet because she was busy chatting. now i put a password on the pc so she cant use it….i am very patient person but i ran out of it with her. who wouldnt??? uuwi ako at kakaing sunog na sinaing, madumi ang cr at mabaho ang damit (mind you we’re using a digital washing machine, the clothes are almost dry when it’s done) so the house works she does are not really difficult and then my nephew whom she supposed to look after doesnt even stay at home most of the time…she has lots of time to watch tv and to sleep and it’s fine with me but now i’ve lost it! i talked to my mom to send her back from where she came from…i couldnt take it anymore….i feel like am really beginning to hate her enough to hurt her and i wouldnt want to. so to prevent that i just want her to leave our house…i fear that she is capable of doing something really mean…and before all those things happen i just want her out. now while she’s still herei dont talk to her anymore i just ignore her so i wouldnt get mad…reading your email made me think to give her a second chance but i’ve given her a lot of 2nd chances already…nagsawa na ako

  161. well, i had these people who made my life really difficult. kasi po i had these friends (new found friends) ung isa gusto niya siya lang ung tama and ung parang alam niya lahat. then ung isa naman backfighter. some people naman, they belittle other people. they want the spotlight on their own. i mean, gusto nila sila lang ang bida. there is no unity on them. they don’t give a chance to other people. and it is difficult for me to deal with this people. nagpapasensiya na lang tlga ako. just to understand them. about my newly found friends, i just realized that they are not true and i can’t pretend to be with them. kasi is not me. and di na ako comfortable. ang sabi sa akin, makipagplastikan na lang daw ako. but i can’t do that. it’s hard for me. kpg di na kasi ako comfortable na kasama ka. because u r not true to me, i just act formal to you. i mean, kapag kinausap mo ako kakausapin kita. kapg may nagtanong ka, sasagot ako. pero di ako makikipagkwenthan just like before. ganun ako. i just keep quiet. it is not in my vocabulary to be a pretender. naisip ko lang if i have do that? or i just be myself?. un ang maga tanong ko sa sarili ko. i cannot be around with these kind of people. but i just realized that i think God put them in my life for me to be strong and to learn from them. kaya lang mahirap. siguro ganun lang tlga. …thank you for reading my comments=)

  162. Hi Bro. Bo,
    Really true! There are difficult persons in our lives, and you’re lucky if there’s only one! ha ha. In my own opinion, I don’t think God allowed these people to be difficult. It’s their choice to be difficult. One thing good with God is, He gave us the free will to choose between right and wrong. So i believe the difficult person is solely responsible for his actions. Am amazed though, on how God can be very patient ! If it was us, we punish them already. ha ha. I agree though, that their presence enhances our lives spiritually. I know of someone who still is talking things negative against me for so many years! Who cares? What matters to me most is, how i look in the eyes of God. True, the road to Heaven, says Jesus is narrow and full of thorns. Difficult as it may be, i myself tried not to be a difficult person to someone else’s life! ha ha. Nobody is perfect, but Jesus said, ” Be perfect as your Heavenly Father is perfect.”
    Thanks so much for this wonderful space!
    May God inspire you more in your ministry. May He bless you and your family.
    strel

  163. Dear Bo,
    As long as you need air to breathe, then you need these difficult people to practice the very essence of loving. For love is way beyond loving the “lovable”.; it threads a far more ridiculous path… loving even when you don’t get loved in return… loving anyway, whether you get loved back or not. Well, sometimes perception of “difficult” people may only mean people who are not your type, who are not always agreeing to your standards nor your expectations. And believe me, that difficult person could be even you yourself at times.
    I have had a lot of difficult people in my life. So numerous that it got me to thinking… why so many of them? Only to find out in the long run, after much prayer and reflection, that I AM the difficult one. And I thank God for this truth, for it humbled me completely. It gave me peace for realizing this. Although I must say, through the many years I have been a difficult person to my love ones, I may have come to the point that however I may try to reverse my ways, they could not forgive me. And, frail as I am, weaknesses overwhelmingly drive me back to where I feel I’m fighting for survival.
    Don’t get me wrong though. I have a lot of friends… people who look up to me, who can’t seem to end their compliments and affections toward me. And they give me strength, knowing that I can change, because I am not their difficult person.
    It’s only a matter of who you are to people, and who they are to you. In the end, the most important question is … who you are to God.

  164. My husband behaves like a single man. He wants to be a bachelor all his life. He can’t provide our family with financial support coz he has lots of debts and keep on spending for lotto. As a husband , he doesn’t support me emotionally, spiritually and phsically, Moreso, because we have been separated for more 10 years and just got reconciled 4 years ago. I continue to love him and pray that through God’s timing , He will turn to the Lord and change for the better. My daughter is resenting all these but she supports me in prayer. Please do pray for my husband Ken.

  165. i just remember my mother told me,” mabigat anak ang dinadala mong krus kasi may nakasabit na matsing”, maybe tha’s a difficult person for me. It seems like eveything is too hard for me to accomplish because of him but I can’t ge rid of him ( they’re saying my “bitterhalf” )r because I love him. I did almost everything to make him happy, I even went abroad to fill up his unattended responsibilities just knowing that my marriage is just getting worst. Right now he left us, and I dont know if I will still chase him and ask him to return or I will just let go of him. For six years his been a very difficult person for me. Im always asking God kung parusa ba ito sakin because maaga akong nagasawa but Im very sure there’s a purpose. I never felt that he has been a father or a husband to me. Di naman ako bad person, bakit kaya ganun binigay nya sakin na asawa. Sorry God I know I dont even have a pinch of right to ask your plans, but sometimes if I’m too hurt I can’t help but ask you. Life has to go on,maybe I’ll wait till he shows up or ako lalapit? sa palagay mo brother BO?

  166. i had experienced that when i met my previous boss. considering that i was new to the workplace, she showed kindness and consideration only during the first few months. then she turned into a nightmare after that adjustment period. she had a favorite among her subordinates and unfortunately, i wasn’t that person. i did things to please her. but when she wanted to, she would strike me with comments that were not so pleasant to hear. she gave me a very low evaluation without considering my workload and sacrifices for that institution. so what i just did is let her be for quite some time because i know what my real capacity when it comes to work. besides, it wouldn’t help if i argued it with her. she would always stick to the idea that she’s right. also, i didn’t mind her when she would say something. i literally drifted away from her. after a year when i couldn’t take it anymore, i resigned, prayed that i did the right thing and wished that she could find someone who works more dedicated than me.

  167. hello po,
    any difficult person sa buhay sa min ng nanay ko ay ang lola ko. Siya po ang kasama kasama namin sa bahay ng nanay ko. eversince po ay kasama na namin sya sa bahay at ang nanay ko ang nag aalaga sa kanya kahit maraming syang kapatid na pweding mag alaga or kung saan pweding mag stay ang lola ko. ang hirap po kasi minsan ang nanay ko pa ang sasabihan nya ng walang utang na loob. Di po namin alam bakit nya nasabi yon. Para nga pong me mga bad spirits syang mga alaga eh.. kasi po minsan bigla na lang nyang sinakal ang nanay ko.. mahigpit at di matanggal ng nanay ko ang pagkakasakal sa kanya.. 80 yrs old na po ang lola ko… ang hirap po talaga nyang pakisamahan. ayoko pong magtanim ng sama ng loob or magalit sa kanya. Minsan nga po naiisip ng nanay ko na hindi sya anak… ni rehistro po ng birth certificate sa NSO wala ang nanay ko.. ang baptismal cert po nya mali mali pa ang info.. hirap po kami kung pano makakakuha ng papers ang nanay ko para sa birth certificate nya. naawa po talaga ako sa nanay ko. di man lang sya makaalis ng bahay ng matagal dahil pag alam ng lola ko na aalis sya minsan parang nag iinarte na lang na nahihilo para di umalis ang nanay ko. ang hirap po talaga.. please pray for us. salamat.. God bless us all.

  168. I encounter a lot of difficult people here in the office. 2 are from the management team and another one from another department - all in all, there are 3 difficult people - I’m dealing with everyday. The “2 person” who just got promoted and eventually became part of the management, grabe sobrang pinunta nila yung mga position nila sa mga utak nila. Sobrang bossy. Parang mga power-hunger at sobrang power-tripper. The other one, well she has this attitude of slamming the door sa office kapag badtrip siya. Minsan hindi naman siya badtrip sayo pero hindi talaga maganda ang timpla nya, ibabalibag na lang niya yung pinto. Common things about this 3 persons, they don’t accept accountability, kahit may mga pagkakamali sila ipapasa nila sa iba. They will start washing their hands and put the blame to somebody else. Another thing, they’re super bossy as if they are your master and you are the slave. And lastly they gossip about other people, it their way of having fun. Which is so pathetic. Grabe ang galit ko sa kanila. Everyday pagod na pagod ako with dealing with them. I kept my mouth shut kasi wala rin ang magagawa kahit na awayin ko sila o kausapin ng maayos. I even curse them and wished na mamatay na sana sila, pero I feel sorry din at the end. Hopeless ba? hindi naman sana…

  169. to richard,

    i pray for you and your kids and hope that He would give you & your family the strength, patience & understanding to love your autistic son. :-)

    autism is not something you “catch.” until now, the cause is unknown… there is not something you did/ didn’t do that “caused” the autism.
    i hope your doctor or dev pediatrician talks to you about it & gives you and your family the resources & support you need. :-)
    these may be helpful:
    1. www.autismspeaks.org/
    2. http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1191843,00.html
    3. http://www.autismsocietyph.org/home.html

    God bless always!

  170. yes!i have this very difficult person in my life right now and he was my younger brother..he’s seems so irresponsible doing things even for himself..we always fight and we often not give a smile to each other..i got a hard feelings to him..thinking even how great my patience he’s always an irritation to me..everytime i ask him his plans to himself,unfortunately he will always answer me “i don’t know”…that strikes me a hurt feeling coz at his age he dont even know what to do for himself..he’s not facing the reality of his life and he always deny even his family nor listens to us..we,his faily just want to help him but he;’s not giving us the chance to fill his heart of understanding and love…he’s always thinking that were just playing perfect in everything we do,that’s why he cant accept our purpose..please po help us pray about our brother’s situation that earlier,one day he could see light,chances to change…and he will realize how important he was..thank you po..

  171. i have had too many..hehe…sa work especially. until recently, hindi na nga ako narenew sa work ko….i thank the Lord that despite some financial difficulties right now, i still feel happy and peaceful, and i know it is because of His grace. Pag nakikita ako nung mga kasama ko sa work, especially yong mga naghabi ng kung ano-anong kasinungalingan at yong mismong coordinator ko, they’re thinking pa nga daw na para na daw ako nababaliw kasi im still happy…eh ano namankaya gusto nila? magmukmok ako?…i dont know, maybe they can’t comprehend the fact that people of God can still smile despite difficulties because the Lord is helping them.

    anyways, lam ko din naman that the Lord is teaching me some lessons here. pero yong huling nasagot ko nga ang coordiantor ko, dala na siguro ng madaming previous incidents na nagtimpi naman ako sa kanya, kumbaga, bumingo na kasi sya sa akin. pero kahit maganda naman ang approach ko sa kanya nung una, eh sya tong high-pitched agad, kaso, soprano ako, kaya nung napuno na ako, mas high-pitched na ko hehe, its about the make up duty of our students, na sa una pa lang talaga ayaw ko ng pag make up dutyhin because i thought its unreasonable, eh pinilit nung daalwang clinical instructors na dapat daw may make-up duty,s o sige, para lang hindi naman nila sabihing sobrang pro-student ako, na lagi nilang sinasabi, na hindi naman totoo, syempre, dun lang ako sa palagay ko ay mas tama….bandang huli, yong students ko ang may make up duty at yong mga students nung 2 CI, …abkit daw hindi sa kanya lumapit mga students?…eh nilapaitan na nga sya…sinabihan nya mga bata na wag pakialaman ang make up duty ng iba, na wag sila mainggitin, na masama ugali yon…kaya halos ayaw ng mag-approach sa knya ng mga students eh…wala…bandang huli na lang nila ginawang kunwari pinagbayad ng make up duty yong mga bata at kunwari pinagpasa ng written requirement. hay naku! madami pang “mahiwagang” kwento.

    so yon nga, anyways, sabi ko nga, the Lord is teaching me some lessons here too, sabi ng VP namin, sometimes kahit alam mong ikaw ang tama, wag ka na lang kumibo, boss yon eh…eh kaso nga siguro talagang bumingo na talaga sya sa akin…tska ako, kasi, minsan din, pag lam kong tama ako, talagang hindi pwedeng hindi ako kumibo…eh pero siguro nga, kailangan ko na ring matutunang mag-bow na lang… ;)

  172. Difficult person in my life is my father. He is a truly selfish, self centered, irresponsible father that I have known in my life. But since he is my father I cannot do anything about it but accept the fact that he is my father & pray to God to enlighten him and If possible he would take him already ahead of my mother.

  173. God is AWESOME!

    From my own experience He reveals Himself to me as a compassionate, understanding and loving God; something which my heart and mind cannot fathom…Words are not enough to describe how great He is.

    These people come into our lives with a purpose, whether for a SEASON, and definitely for a REASON or a LIFETIME!

    Have an awesome day everyone and GOD BLESS!!!

  174. there is this one person that i find so hard to relate to. maybe because i have already heard some negative comments about this person before i actually met her. prejudice might already have been at work here. but the more i spent time with her i knew that i could never trust her. i’ve seen the good in her and i try to focus on that but it’s not easy. i knew that spending less time with her would actually be better. i prayed for her. i prayed for me. i am more sad than annoyed now. sometimes i think i pity her more than anything.

    i know another difficult person, me. i think i may be a difficult person to some people that i know. God has been revealing some areas in my life that i need to lift up to Him. yielding can be hard, it can be painful. but it sure will be worth it!

    when we have a difficult person in our life, he/she:
    - teaches us to be more gracious, more patient, more understanding
    - helps us to look for what is good. God said He has created everything and it is good. enables us to be better observers of thehuman race, better hunters too! hunt for the hidden treasure buried within each difficult person
    - serves as checks for us, to see where we are at in terms of how we relate to others too
    - gives us opportunities to pray more
    - gives us opportunities to be like Christ more by loving our “enemies” (although it is hard, but if we ask Him to help us, nothing is too difficult)

    wow! i think we actually would need to thank God for bringing these difficult people in our lives!

    depending on how we react, they can build us up or tear us down.

  175. I think the difficult person in my life would be myself. Why? Because I did many things that makes God hurt, eventhough I know what I did is wrong but I always did it. I’m not proud of myself, the story is like this : I broke up with my-ex around 3 years ago because he got married with someone else, but during the 3 years, we still contacted each other, i tried not to contact him but if he contacted me i’ll respond to it. I kept telling myself that I only consider him as my friend but he will say good things to me and finally i fall in love with him again. I knew what I did is wrong and I want to forget about him but I can’t do that because part of me still want to be with him .. Now, I’m still trying to forget about him, please pray for me … thanks .. GBU all

  176. The difficult person in my life would be Sammy. I wish she’s not afraid to face the future with me anymore. I hope we can reconcile our differences and make up for the lost time. I am willing to do so. I am willing to do everything to make things alright with her. Unfortunately, she is not. But I still believe in us. Im gonna stay patient with her. I love her and I know that she loves me also. I just hope that she take the risk again with me. I wish to be her and stay with her until we grow old. I hope she does too.

  177. I would consider my sister-in-laws as the most difficult persons in my life now…so difficult that i developed resentment to them…it started way back when my husband (their brother) and i were still in college and then when we got married, they would often say hurtful words to me, it was like my heart was broken by what they would say :(( and since it took us a long time to have our own son, they would often say that i was incapable of getting pregnant…that really hurts me. i would always cry at night and would fight with my husband since i couldn\’t fight them back because their like 10 or more years older than me. and even if they acted like that i still respect them. and what hurts me up to now is that they do not consider my son as their nephew and they do not play with him…yet in my prayers, i would always ask for their acceptance of me, and enlightenment on thier part as well as wisdom to act their age…i’m still praying for a positive relationship with them despite of everything that happened between us. :)

  178. I and my siblings have these difficult people in our lives - our half siblings. They’re just not our burden but our mother, too, who died early of cancer, and everyone believed it was due to stress that she had cancer. All of her life and our lives, we had to put up with our older half siblings. Mom married our father, a widower of 11 children, not just any ordinary children, but 11 grudging, angry and unkind children. They weren’t really together with my father, who’s a very loving, respectable and decent man, as they were growing up. That is why everyone who learned of how they were treating us (their younger half siblings), understood how far their attitudes are compared to our father. I guess you will say how could a single, eligible, successful career woman, fall and marry a widower with 11 kids?! Well, it was simply because our father is the most patient, loving, thoughtful, sweetest person. I, myself, have never met a man same as my father who’s wise, intelligen and most of all, faithful.
    Times have changed for the worse, when Mother died. One even forced herself to live with us - in the house which our father gave to our mom, a conjugal property. We had no choice but to accept her because we didn’t want to make our father feel bad. No one wanted to take that half sibling in, not even her own brothers and sisters. She’s really a diffficult woman and always, I guess every hour she gossips to her relatives and siblings about me and my brothers and reports to them everyday about what we are doing and what is happening here. She even has the gall to invite a relative to live in our own house without asking for permission. When in fact, our house is very very small and could hardly fit her in. She’s crazy to even say bad things about our mother who already is in peace with God and compare her to their mother. She’s awful and to think she’s already 60 years old - separated with 2 kids living with their father. We chose not to fight her back because we all think it’s useless, because we didn’t think she will ever really change at her age. But what’s sad is that she will even hurt my kids by calling them foul names and saying bad words to them and making them cry. It was too much, Bo. I always pray to God for more patience and wisdom and love…but things just couldn’t be. and all of them are just the same…they’ve done the worse things to my mother when she was alive but she remained quiet and never let my father know of what they have been doing to her when she was alive.

  179. I and my siblings have these difficult people in our lives - our half siblings. They’re just not our burden but our mother, too, who died early of cancer, and everyone believed it was due to stress that she had cancer. All of her life and our lives, we had to put up with our older half siblings. Mom married our father, a widower of 11 children, not just any ordinary children, but 11 grudging, angry and unkind children. They weren’t really together with my father, who’s a very loving, respectable and decent man, as they were growing up. That is why everyone who learned of how they were treating us (their younger half siblings), understood how far their attitudes are compared to our father. I guess you will say how could a single, eligible, successful career woman, fall and marry a widower with 11 kids?! Well, it was simply because our father is the most patient, loving, thoughtful, sweetest person. I, myself, have never met a man same as my father who’s wise, intelligen and most of all, faithful.
    Times have changed for the worse, when Mother died. One even forced herself to live with us - in the house which our father gave to our mom, a conjugal property. We had no choice but to accept her because we didn’t want to make our father feel bad. No one wanted to take that half sibling in, not even her own brothers and sisters. She’s really a diffficult woman and always, I guess every hour she gossips to her relatives and siblings about me and my brothers and reports to them everyday about what we are doing and what is happening here. She even has the gall to invite a relative to live in our own house without asking for permission. When in fact, our house is very very small and could hardly fit her in. She’s crazy to even say bad things about our mother who already is in peace with God and compare her to their mother. She’s awful and to think she’s already 60 years old - separated with 2 kids living with their father. We chose not to fight her back because we all think it’s useless, because we didn’t think she will ever really change at her age. But what’s sad is that she will even hurt my kids by calling them foul names and saying bad words to them and making them cry. It was too much, Bo. I always pray to God for more patience and wisdom and love…but things just couldn’t be. and all of them are just the same…they’ve done the worse things to my mother when she was alive but she remained quiet and never let my father know of what they have been doing to her when she was alive no matter how hard she tries to serve them and please them. It was always never enough for these people.

  180. Hi Bro. Bo,

    thanks again for the inspiration and thank you God for sending you bro bo to us…

    Difficult person in my life…ohhh that was long ago but until now I can’t forget those days when he betrayed me. That’s my ex boyfriend, our relationship lasts for almost four years, four suffering years (take note… tsk)

    He went to Canada for an Immigrant visa, to make the story short we had a long distance relationship, and that’s hard for me. After a year and a half of staying there he decided to broke up with me, I really don’t know the reasons at all, it’s too unfair to me. After a year of our break up I heard from his relatives that he had a girl there and she was pregnant at that time we broke up….
    Oh God it’s too painful for me to accept everything until now, but with the grace of the Almighty God, I have learned to accpet those things and became my strength when I am down and hurt.
    As of now I’m continue praying for him that he may realize that someone suffered a lot because of him.

    Thank you and hope this will be a lesson for all of us…

    God Bless Bro. Bo!

    Keep it up!

  181. I believe God let us encouter diffucult people to help us mature and continue to improve our patience in dealing with difficult situations.

    I am dealing with a few difficult people in my life and sad to say they are all related to me :( I tried to just listen everytime they vent or do something that is not so pleasing. Pero ika nga “may hangganan ang pagpapasensya”. Hanggang saan nga ba? Kasi ngayon isang malaking pagsubok sa akin ang pag pasensyahan ang mga taong ito.

    Patuloy akong dumadalangin sa puong may kapal na patawarin ako sa king mga sala at patnubayan ako sa aking pakikitungo sa mga taong patuloy na sumusubok sa aking pasyensa.

    Salamat sa artikulong ito at kahit paano nalulunasan ang mga tanong sa aking isipan.

  182. I don’t think God gives us difficult people on purpose. It’s just that these people choose to be difficult and it’s really up to them to change for the better.

    My Dad is THE difficult person in my life. He is so full of negativities, he’s had a stroke for 13 times already!
    He doesn’t appreciate life, he always says he’s going to die or commit suicide (he’s been saying it for the past 20 years!)

    He doesn’t appreciate the things that people around him do for him.He curses the people close to him (his children, his sisters and caregivers) through texts or on paper (he can no longer talk because of suffering from stroke).

    He throws stuff at people when he doesn’t get what he want (what he wants are, more often than not, things that are bad for his heart).Lately, he successfully created conflict among his children by fabricating lies.

    We try to bring him closer to God by inviting him to the Feast but he finds ways to avoid going there.

    Strangely, wherever he stays for a period of time, the people he stays with either suffer from financial difficulties or get sick. Must be the negative vibes rubbing off.

    I really hope and pray that he finds it in his heart to change for the better before his time runs out.

  183. Difficult people comes to us in the time God wants us to Love that difficult person and at the same time practice certain virtues (with His grace) so that we may become holy. But in every difficult person, events and situations that comes into our life there is one very important virtue that God wants us to exercise…and that is humility. It is impossible love your enemies and to have the other gifts of the Holy Spirit if you don’t have humility

  184. bro,
    i tried reading some of the replies posted, pero parang ang bigat sa dibdib because basically all you can read is ung angst ng bawat isa towards those difficult person in their lives, so i stopped. i feel it is unhealthy. sori

  185. Difficult persons are sent by God to us so that we may learn to Love that person and for us to practice certain virtues so that we may be holy…But in all the difficult persons, events, situations that God allows us to have He want us (by His Grace) to exercise humility, because it is impossible to love your enemies when you are not humble. and it is impossible for the other virtues to flourish in us without humility

  186. EVERYONE is a teacher…

    We are all connected to each other… every person we encounter will surely give us lessons to ponder… but there are times that we overlooked these lessons because we are preoccupied by the grievances we have for that person…

    we should not let these difficult persons ruin our day or our entire life… just don\’t absorb their negative energies. :)

  187. Thank you so much bro. Bo.

    I have a difficult people in my life and that’s my husband. Sometimes nauubusan na po ako ng pasensya but i always pray for him na magbago na sya..minsan nakakapagsalita na ako ng hindi maganda sa kanya..but i ask GOD to forgive me what i’ve said.

    I know GOD will be the one to change him.

  188. I think like i am one of them …. child that the mission in life is to be difficult. .. the thorn in someone’s flesh… irresponsible. demanding. … negative. ..selfish. …. possessive. …. always depressed… and i am making mylife hell? i dont know… a lot of times i dont believe to myself…i am a mess… i need some comment to help me finally realize things about me… i dont know what to do. feeling hopeless here.

  189. IT probably took me 10 minutes to find this box to write my comment with so many stories above it! Hehe..
    well sometimes when i encounter these people, my automatic reaction would be to think that maybe.. just maybe for some people i am the one who is difficult. then i am humbled. so i dont go on thinking that “buti pa ako mabait or this person is so bad” because who am i to be a judge of that?
    yes sometimes i lose it, iget angry and hold ill feelings towards these types of people. but for most times i refrain from doing that. not good, will definitely ruin your entire day!
    but there’s a saying to seek first to understand to be understood. maybe we all have to understand first where that person is coming from before we equal being a difficult person to a bad person.
    sometimes they’re not one and the same.=)

  190. Dear Bro.Bo…

    I had a difficult person in our office,named;sherlyn, ana liza, adonnis. I had a hard time to approach to sherlyn,for she is so angry to me,and i don’t know her reason why.everytime I approach to her, it seems that she is looks angry to me. And one time she put all the blame to me, but I still hold on to my temper,and pray to God to extend it.She is the sister of one of our boss.Thats why I have to hold on to my temper.

  191. i have this friend that is so dear to me. but maybe because of distance and time and awkward silence, our communication reached to a point where it became superficial, probably to the level of “hi, how are you?” and nothing more. i had attempted to open up and share every thing i could regarding my life, but this person does not seem to want to pick up. well, it could only hurt so much seeing a great friendship turn somewhat cold and ordinary. yet, there maybe other things (and people) affecting my friend today. she might be having difficult times (and people) herself. and i may have also been difficult and impossible many times over.

    I would like to quote robert fulghum, what he said when love seems to get difficult: “And it’s love that’s complicated by age and knowledge and confusing values. Love, to be sure. But not simple.”

    i also think the difficult people in our lives allow us to discover that at the end of the day, we could not truly change them, we could only change ourselves. each encounter gives us ideas of who we are and what we could be capable of, like the capacity to forgive or the courage to move on, or the simple acknowlegement that no one is perfect. there are also lessons to learn from each other, to make the necessary improvements we have to with our relationships with others and ourselves.

  192. yes of course i encountered dificult person that im always thinking she is tempting my patience that i thought she is the evil one but then reflecting about it especially in the reading of the day that says love ur enemy or love the person that u hate, i simply pray that Lord cast her away from my way and i pray that He will touch her heart and i pray for my heart too to be forgiving and soften to her and just accept who she is and just teach my heart to love her too instead and i ask forgiveness in hating her or aggravated by her.

  193. i really have a defficult person in my life, not one,but its more.you know what will i do to them, i’ll kept pray to God silently & also praying for myself that i can loved them, because its part of our christian duty.

  194. Difficult people in my life?

    Halos lahat ng tao. Why is it that people are nice to me at first but later on avoid me like the plague?

    Wala naman akong bad breath or body odor.
    Hindi naman ako tsismosa. Hindi naman ako naninira ng tao. Masunurin naman ako at magalang at palabati. Masipag naman ako sa trabaho ko.

    Hindi nga lang ako palakwento gaano at hindi rin ako palabiro at medyo kulang sa sense of humor. But meron din naman paminsan-minsan.

    Ang hindi ko lang talaga magawa is to join in people’s green jokes.

    Pero should these be enough reasons for people to avoid me.

    It really hurts. I am so poor. Poverty is not just in material things. Poverty is also being an outcast.

    I could be frank and blunt with these people but I don’t want to hurt their feelings.

    I just want to find out … how can I have true friends? People who will accept me for who and what I am.

    I need your advice Bro. Bo.

    Thank you and God bless you and your ministry.

  195. hi bro.bo,
    difficult people, in my daily they are with me.. ive seen them everyday.. im just praying that God will give me more patience.. and im always singing ” Lord grant me serenity….

  196. Hello Bo, I was once a difficukt person to love… I was so depressed I cried everyday, I hated my parents and other family members, I hated myself and my life.. BUt I am very blessed because despite my difficult self, there were people who remianed by my side, who loved despite all of my bad characteristics, until one day, I was able to overcome those. Now, I make it my mission to be that loving person to these difficult people / circumstances. Because I was (and still is) blessed with fantastic loving people such as my family and friends, I too should be a blessing to others :)

  197. I don’t know how to answer this question but i will try to. well for me i have an ex Bf who is a difficult person in my life we broke up recently and it still hurts. we have a culture indifference and we cannot give and take for each other but as i take my break away from him i pacify things and i realized that if he is a difficult person to me maybe i am a difficult person also to his life. You give what you recieve… I am happy that i realized it. Now i keep peace in my self. No hardships, regrets and maybe no selfish reason…:) hope u understand my comment.

  198. i got pregnant and abandoned by her father…but carry over pains and i even sacrifice just to make my child happy as i bring her in this world of life..

    but now im happy…living without that irresponsible person.:-)

  199. God brings difficult persons in our life in able for us to develop our patience and understanding… The difficult person in my life has been my friend before. I trusted and have loved her 100% for what she is and have been always there for her in her most difficult times but she had a change of heart and turn our friendship into hate… She started acting like a jerk and keep on telling bad things about me behind my back. She has been cold for an unknown reason… And I know it’s because of jealousy. But in friendship we should be happy for what out friends have but her she got an attitude. Until we ended our friendship started hating each other so much. Now I’m just praying to God for the bad feelings to leave my heart and hoping that peace will again dwell within it. On the other hand I understand her for the reason that she came from a broken family and maybe the insecurities comes from it. Just praying that God will give me more patience…

  200. Hi Bro. Bo,

    Wow, I am so blessed I don’t have any difficult person to deal with these days.

    But when I was still in the corporate world, - that was years ago - there was this guy who was so negative in his words and actions. He was always pessimistic, always seeing the bad side of things. He always noted the unfavorable side of people, bitterly complaining about the government (regardless of whoever was sitting as president), the mess of our traffic, pollution problems, well just about anything that moves in the planet.

    How did I deal with him? I just managed to avoid him as much as possible.

    Kahit gusto ko siyang ipakulam, baka pati yung mangkukulam ay pagalitan niya, so di na lang.

    Rey Ortega

  201. reading this entry is so timely because I’ve been affected again by a very difficult person in my life—my husband. we’ve been separated for almost a year now because he has definitely been a pain–he’s a liar, he’s a hypocrite, he’s careless, unfair and apathetic. recently, he has started making my life difficult again because of his failure to financially support my children…

    I just keep on praying to God for strength and much much more patience. I also hope that God will help me decipher the reason of my husband being a part of my life.

  202. Difficult person? I had 1, half year of my life. Yap, it\’s my husband. Lahat ng description ni Bo sa taas nasa kanya. There was a time in my life that I really asked the Lord why he allowed him to enter into my life is it because I am a sinful woman that he has to punish with this guy. And ginawa ko rin yung mag-dasal na sana e mawala na siya sa buhay ko na nung ikumpisal ko sa pari ay pinagalitan ako kasi gusto ko pa daw gawing kriminal ang Diyos. (^_^) Maraming naging katanungan sa puso ko na karamihan sa sagot ay sa akin tumatama. But then come to think of it me mga naging positive result din naman. I became closer and had a deeper relationship with God and it made me tough di ko nga rin ma-intindihan ang sarili ko kasi dati all that I\’d do is cry my heart out to God. Minsan nga nabibigla rin ako kasi palaging parang pa-laban ang sagot ko which I regret afterwards and ask the Lord to forgive me and give me the courage to treat him naman nicely din. And God is putting a lot of compasion in my heart to still accept and forgive him whatever it is that he is doing to my life. (^_^)

  203. Definitely! There is one guy in our office that I really as in really find difficult to get with… Almost everyday, I cannot help my self saying bad things about him. He is very irresponsible, very boastful and so bossy… He is of different race and culture and I honestly don’t know if all of their kinds are like that. He always feels he can dominate everyone in the office. He always bullies some of my team mates and it really gets me irritated and mad. He is very irresponsible in a sense that he doesn’t do his job. The thing is why we can’t tell this to our boss is because they tolerate him. They know about this but do not act on it. There was even one time I got really angry at him because he did something bad to me and to one of my colleagues at work and I wasn’t able to come to work because my head was so painful and really my head started aching the moment I got really mad at him. I even cursed him and wished he was dead. I said a lot of things bad about him.

    I don’t know why there is such a kind of person like him. He is very inconsiderate to other people. Whenever I pray at night, I ask Lord’s forgiveness of all the bad things I said esp. to this guy and pray that he’ll change for the better. Wishing that this person will realize his wrong doings. I also ask God to give me an open mind to understand because I am only human and sometimes I cannot control myself to get angry.

  204. Hi Bro. Bo,
    This is for Jay—
    God must have loved your father so much for giving him 13 chances to live! Pray the Chaplet of the Divine Mercy for him. This prayer brings conversion. Jesus touches the hardened souls thru this Chaplet. I showed just the picture of the Divine Mercy to a patient of mine, who was really ” impossible” !!!. I told him i would pray for him and that Jesus loves him. He answered me with contempt and cruel remarks. Later, something had happened that saved him from danger. The following day, he approached me like a lamb, so kind and smiling saying, ” Thanks for praying for me…” I don’t know what i did, but he continued, ” Yes, i believe…” And you know what? he is NOT a Christian!
    Trust in Jesus for your dad’s conversion before his time runs out.
    God bless you.
    Thanks Bro. Bo.
    star

  205. i became close to the lord when i had one difficult person in my life. he was the father of my love child. i was 17 when i had his child. he beats me up and womanizes. i met a friend named lilu who belongs to the cross community ( i am not sure if its still around) who re-introduced me to my god. it was because of that difficult situation that lead me to him again. right now having a new relationship with another man and 2 babies by him, i can say that i am not with a difficult person but i am in a difficult situation that manifests on the person i am with. it is sad but it is only these difficult situation that i see god’s miracles and grace.

  206. Just reading the comments of all who shared their pains is very assuring enough that I am not alone. Also, in one way or another, I am the difficult person to somebody, too. I wonder why God has the patience on me. He must really love me that much…and so to all of us.

  207. Yes, I agree that God allows difficult people to come into our lives to give us special gifts. I think these gifts are:

    1. To learn how to be REALLY PATIENT.
    2. To learn and see how to make things EASIER for other people.
    3. To know WHAT NOT TO DO.
    4. To learn how to SEE and APPRECIATE what GOOD QUALITIES other people have and what we have ourselves.
    5. To realize that the only being who can really LOVE us without even asking and forcing Him to do so, is God. We don’t even need to waste our time with all the difficult people in our lives and ask them to LIKE or LOVE us because God does. =)

  208. Absolutely yes! Im working here in Abu Dhabi for 6 months now as a personal secretary in one of the hotel here.. For the first 3months, my boss was relly really good to me. Everything was fine and smooth. All of a sudden, he alwas upset with me because for him im not good and cannot do my job very well. In short, i cant meet his standards. But what actually im thingking is because i became so close to his Asst. Manager, in which he feels jealous… (that’s according to my observation).
    And what hurts most, is that i found out that he already put an advertisement on the internet that he is looking for a new secretary without even informing me……. I mean , if he doesnt like me, then tell me so at least i have enough time to find a new job. And when i found out that one, i talked to him and told him that i saw the advertisement but just told me that he didn’t care if I saw it. He was really mean!!! I was so upset and i just cried that time. Since that day, he was not talking to me and he was doing all my jobs. He was not asking anything from me. He was trying to prove that he can do everything without me as her secretary..until now. But God is really good! Now i found a new job.. better position and salary and better environment.
    I just wish that God will touch his heart. Because in his 1 year in his position as a manager, he already had 3 secretaries including me. It means that he has really a problem..
    I know God will reach his heart>

  209. Bro. Bo,

    I just do not know what to do with my husband. He is not the most difficult person in my life but what makes him worst is because I am married to him.

    He is very stubborn and like a child that has tantrums. He doesn’t want to be told of what he should do. He is also harsh in his words without thinking if he is hurting others already. He is known in the office as a masungit guy. He always complain even for petty things. He doesn’t have the patience to people who commit mistakes. He is overly self-righteous. He always see the negative things in almost everybody around us.

    We were married already for 6 years and I am afraid that there will come a time that I need to leave him. Because I felt that in our relationship I am always the one who adjust to his attitude. I am not free to express what I want to say without thinking that he will be hurt. I can’t say that we are in a healthy relationship.

    Because of him, I also learned how to be very very patient. But sometimes, I can’t help but being sorry for myself because I married him.

    Juanita

  210. Hi bro. bo,

    God has indeed all the resons why he is allowing difficult people to become part of our daily lives…..

    Hay, I just hope time will come that they will also realize how difficult life is because of their existence….

    The lesson, dont be like them….
    May GOD be our strength as we continue to bear and endure the pain of being with difficult people.

  211. I think God gave me the gift of patience, understanding, courage and strength so that I would be able to surpass the many trials living with difficult persons in my life. I practically lost track of the times that I cried because I felt hopeless, and during those times God was my only reason to survive, I pray to him to always guide me. And with his loving grace, I was able to surpass everything. Indeed, he listens and answers all our prayers. He sends angels to guide us..It may be our friends, relatives etc..

    We should never lose hope for He is always there for us..If we feel that nobody seems to care for us, just pray and you will feel that you are loved through gods presence..

    God bless us all..

  212. I think that God make us experience living with these difficult persons to make us grow more patient, more prayerful, get closer to Him and to become perfect. Well, maybe not over night but it is attainable! God bless us…

  213. i was just cheated, lied, fooled and betrayed for several years by this woman. terrible. i discovered it by accident. too late. now ‘m stucked in a very unpleasant and crazy situation. hope i could just find a way out here.

  214. hi bro.bo
    yung difficult person sa buhay ko ngayon ay ang husband ko. sarado ang isip at puso niya. ang dli niyang napagdesisyunan na ayaw na niya. mas masaya siya na nag iisa. ayaw na niyang magkaroon ng kaugnayan sa akin. pati mga anak namin nagsa suffer.hindi ako napapagod at nagsasawa na ipagdasal siya. alam kong kailangan niya ng enligtenment.mahal na mahal ko siya.ganun din ang anak namin.pero narealize ko din na ang pagiging difficult niya ang nagbukas sa isip at puso ko para maging forgiving,understanding,patient at lalong lalo na ang mapalapit kay Lord. sobra akong nasasaktan pag naiisip ko ang mga masasakit na ginagawa ng asawa ko.pero hindi ko naiisip ang sumuko dahil alam ko na ako higit kanino man ang kailangang umunawa sa kanya. sana mas lumawak pa ang pang unawa ko at maging mas matatag ako para sa mga anak ko at sa pamilya namin. nananalig ako sa Diyos at alam ko na may nakalaan para sa amin. siguro may kailangan pa kaming matutunan kaya hindi pa ibinibigay ni Lord ang sagot sa mga dasal ko…

  215. “The Difficult Person In Our Life” - our O.J.T. (On the Job Training) to test how long is our patience.

    Mine is my husband. But now, I’m putting him aside. I’m focus to solving my other problems.

    “It’s not what happens to us that determines our happiness. It’s how we think about what happens to us.”

  216. ako? i had experience also having encounter difficult people… pero i was really struck to these topic of yours Bo, kasi i can relate to that person you are talking about. And luckily, it’s me…!

    well, i can say perhaps so many times i have been so difficult to my parents, guardian at home, siblings, at school, offices & even in a community.

    what i see the cause is being proud of one’s self made me so stubborn & hard-headed to my elders.

    i sometimes forgot to humble myself, & i keep on insisting that mine is right & theirs are wrong…

    yet the people around me still continue to be patient & concretely loving in many simple ways…

    there are a lot of virtues God wants us to learn in this experiences. like God, he wants us to be more persevere in loving concretely our neighbors perhaps are not easy to love…

    all we need is to look at the person with new eyes every time we encounter him/her…

    & through this by the Grace of God everything will turn anew! a new life, a new friend, a new parents, new brothers & sisters, new officemates!

    it is like a Sun rising up in sky in the morning… day after day…

    have a “new pair of eyes” this time & in every present moment where you may be…

    God bless you all!

    mykho

  217. the difficult person in me..well, she’s the person i see whenever i face the mirror..because of my insecurities in life..i still couldn’t accept and forgive myself..please pray for me..God bless you Bro. Bo..may your tribe increase!!

  218. the difficult persons in my life are those who don’t honor their words especially when paying their dues..

  219. My sister and I just went to a European Group Tour. We met this Filipina who was so condescending and arrogant. I tried to be nice but I really hated her. I remember the verse in Desiderata “Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit”. So I avoided her the entire tour. This ruined my tour that was supposed to be fun and exciting especially spending time with my sister. In the hindsight I know God gave me this thorn and imperfect tour so I’ll be humble whenever I talk about the tour and the places we saw. To understand and be compassionate to the feelings of the people we annoy ourselves. That in reality there will always be people like that and I cannot control them but I can control myself. But there are times when I cannot control myself and so I pray for supernatural help and dependence from God. The gifts… humility, understanding, compassion and wisdom. All my experiences even bad ones are conduits to loving God more and realizing God loving me.

  220. This question/ topic makes me laugh. Why? Because I’ve been struggling with it a lot. In my line of work (I’m a doctor) I meet a lot of “difficult people” on a daily basis.DAILY yan Bo ha!! Patients who sabotage their own health, who keep consulting and consulting but won’t even cooperate with you in making themselves well!! Patient who do their own diagnosis! Hay naku!!! But instead of being angry or frustrated, I say a silent prayer that goes like this: ” Thank you for contributing to my sanctification.” Because truly what they teach me is patience, loving patience and the ability to put myself in their shoes.

  221. I believe that difficult people are put in our lives to bring us closer to God.

    They’re there to teach us virtues and lessons - patience, humility, understanding, wisdom, discerenment - that we would not ordinarily have received if we had never met them.

    Indirectly, their presence enhances our strengths, and to also point out our faults - but in doing this we strengthen and better ourselves.

    It’s not a message handed out on a silver platter, rather, it’s something that is learned through time…

    God bless to all!

  222. We have this elderly neighbor who is a retired, alcoholoic,dentist that we have been trying to deal with for many years now. It seems like his day is never complete if and when he doesn’t give you “the stare, the look, the grumpy attitude”. Most of the time, Bro. Bo, I just ignore him like he doesn’t exist, like I didn’t see anyone, even if he is standing there in front of me as I manuever our car in and out of our garage. Sometimes, I just laugh it off and make fun out of a very “irritating” situation. But there are times when I just can’t close my eyes and forget about what he does or say and I would think of a thousand verses to say to him just in case my patience would reach its limits. At night, I would ask the Lord to give me more patience and understanding for this old man ’cause I know that deep inside, he is just one angry person who doesn’t know how to love and nobody is loving him back; he doesn’t know how to care and his family desn’t care much for him either; and maybe because he doesn’t know GOD.
    So, each time I get really angry with him, I just look at myself and see how blessed I am that I have people who love me and care for me,and that I have the Lord who guides me and who makes me understand why life has to be difficult sometimes.

  223. GOD is so good He created all of us as unique individuals. Some of us may be good others may be bad but that’s what makes the world go round, right?
    Well, the difficult person in my life is my niece, my sister’s daughter. She’s 19 now and very much pregnant without a husband. She started being difficult when she 12 years old where she learned to steal her parents money and her cousin’s personal belongings. She has been doing that for a long time now and she keeps on doing it and even if she is caught red-handed she will keep on denying that she did it. Lately, while studying in college she learned to invite her boyfriend to sleep in their house when her mother is out of town. Then when they were caught she ran away from home and quit school. When they ran out of money she came back home and very much pregnant without the boyfriend. Every member of our family has been advising her but our advise only reached deaf ears. She has been referred to our parish priest and other religious groups in our place for advice but she seems unperturbed. We always lift her up in our prayers. Please help us pray for her.
    Thank you very much. GOD BLESS US ALL.

    JEAN

  224. I married for 4 years no children with my husband but now I’m in Dubai…for what? wanting to at least give time for my husband to realize my importance…. because my better half is very attached with his passion in motor bike racing… his priority is his sports and no time for me when I was in the Philippines. He doesn’t have a plan for our future and a plan to have children. We always fighting when we are talking about this matters, and he even hit me… I was once a battered wife, It’s difficult to get out in this situation because I’m married to him, exchanged marriage vows in front of men and God, a lifetime commitment. Sometimes I’m asking, what did I wrong to deserve this king of person?
    Now I’m here in Dubai to make make him realize my value…. at least for him to follow and start a new life here, but the problem is he really doesn’t want and when I asked him which is his priority… well his passion in motor bike racing… he said he cannot live without it, he can live without me. It really hurts and until now still striving and asking God to wake this guy up and touch his heart.

  225. Just today, I realized that I am a difficult person to some people at work. Please pray for me.

  226. i have my share of difficult peolpe in my life. One is my eldest sister who seems not trusting me on things such as going on an overnight with friends. I just like would think she wants to protect me since our parents are not around. But im already 32 and i know where i should stand. Im not stupid and I fear God to do unacceptable things. Next is my ex boyfriend who i cant seem to understand if he still likes me or not. When we’re together, parang dati pa rin. I admit i still love him though. Sometimes i can’t comprehend if its me who’s at fault. I don’t want to blame myself though. Lastly is my ex boyfriend’s “friend”. We kinda separated because of her partly. I even pleaded her to let me and my boyfriend to live in peace. She says that they’re only just that friends but i don’t really think so, because i know she likes him and their other friends seem to like them together and put me out of the picture. Bro. Bo, i’ve been thru this difficult time in my life and yet i believe that in time, God will work on me to understand these people who doesn’t know how much they hurt me. I just keep my faith and hope for the best. God bless the ministry and Im glad i found my family in this community.

  227. I think the gift hat God is trying to give us when he let difficult people come, are the gift of patience and self awareness… we become more forgiving and become more aware of our own differences as well. we learn to be flexible regarding our own attitudes towards them and we become more prayerful too. Not everyone who drop shit at you is your enemy. right? stepping at shit will sometimes make you stop and see that you are in such a beautiful track. for me difficult people are not pain in the ass… they are highlights that makes life more challenging and memorable.

  228. Gift: Patience, Unconditional Love and more Dependent on Him

    Yes yan ang natutununan ko and even though natutunan ko na yun still the difficult person and more more difficult person will come….kasi tingin ko dun alam ni God na dun ko sya laging kinakausap during my difficulties….until maybe i learned na kahit sa happines eh dapat kausap ko sya every now and then of my life….

    Yan din kasi ang mahirap sa strong personality kala mo kaya lahat and with pride…kasi hanggang ngayon meron pa rin ako nun….

    Difficult person : My boss and office manager of our department in KSA…culture and tradition is not in question here but the mere fact how they treat people….

    but i know God is changing me beause i pray for this and this are HIS GRACES to me.

    Thank you Lord!

  229. wow! this is cool! :D

    well, yes Bro. Bo i got difficult persons in my life especially in school. i have classmates who are Ms. D. And her name even starts with D. anyway, she is a negative person ’cause she always give sarcastic compliments. She doesn’t think before she speaks. She is insensitive of what others would feel. When I’m on my way of proving myself and doing my best, there she goes saying something very painful.Every time she accompanies our group, i cant breathe easy. My heart would ache as well as my head! i would just keep quiet and let her do all the talking. She always breaks my happy mood. She always cast gray clouds on my sunny day! phew! and how i hate her. Really hate her.

    I even kept reading the Kerygma magazine that i received 2 years ago. The main topic was how to handle difficult people. It helps but (tsk3) she’s still difficult until now.The only change that took place is that we are not always together anymore. And that made me breathe easily.

  230. hi kuya,
    one thing i ask for that shall i seek to dwell in the house of the LORD.
    ito ang tanging pangarap ko sa buhay pero pano ko kaya ito magagawa? napakaraming hadlang sa nais kong kabanalan.may mga taong sa kabila ng ipinakikita mong pagmamahal ay susuklian ka pa ng kawalang galang.
    hiling ko lng sa DIYOS na patuloy nya akong bigyan ng sapat na pangunawa at pagmamahal para sa mga taong ito na nagsisilbing tinik sa akin dinaraanan.naway patuloy akong pagkalooban ng BANAL NA ESPIRITO ng katatagan at kagalakan para sa kanila.amen

  231. Difficult person? I have encountered many of them some are form my own family, some are from the company i work with. Sila yung mga tao na sa una maiisip mo they were sent form down under. but then I realized my purpose din sila god still created them 1. To Test our patience 2. Test our faith in god and to our self na hindi ka magpapadala sa inis sa kanya. 3. They’re part of the challenges that we need to conquer through our daily life. Ako I prefer to understand them as much as I can, Pray for them whenever my patience can’t handle it anymore but first of all I pray that may the lord bless these people.

    thanks!

  232. Difficult Person in my Life

    Too sad to know that it’s no other than my husband. He is the most difficult person in my life.

    Nung di pa kami kasal he told me this and that. na ganun sya, yun pala hindi naman totoo. Na graduate sya, na certified engineer sya yun pala hindi at madami syang project yun pala lahat niloloko nya.

    But still, we got married kasi sadya nga yatang bulag ang nagmamahal. Ikinasal kami sa isang civil/Christian rites officiated by a pastor/government official, bumukod at nagkaroon ng isang anak.

    All those times na magkasama kami, it’s always me who provided everything from financial to materials to emotional balance in the family. In short he is indeed useless. He accepted jobs/projects kasi nagsisinungaling sya telling them that he is a licensed engr. But all those projects ay walang natatapos and all of them it’s me who ended up paying for the shortages. Instead na kumita lalo pang napapagastos.

    At di pa dyan nagtatapos… a few years, he betrayed me, sumama sa isang babae na hiwalay sa kanyang asawa. nagsama sla for 2 years, iniwan kami ng aking anak at di pa nakuntento, lagi pa rin akong inaaway kahit di na kami magkasama by putting all the blame on me kung bakit daw kami naghiwalay. He always blurted out na I favored my family more than him and my son. but God knows hindi totoo yun, i provided everything, the house, the finances at ako din ang laging nagpapasensya at nagmamahal sa kanya. He said that i always give my all to my family (mother, bro and sis), yes nagbibigay ako kasi tumutulong ako sa kanila kahit papano kasi sobrang kapos sila (ako naman ay biniyayaan ng mas magandang trabaho).
    Mga kapatid kay Kristo mali po bang mahalin ang extended family ko (bros, sis and mom)? Mali po bang tumulong sa kanila financially? (pero di ko naman talaga pinababayaan ang sarili kong pamilya). You see nang dahil pa nga sa asawa ko yan any dumami ang utang ko kasi pinamabuno sa mga mga kapalpakan nya.

    Until now hiwalay pa rin kami pero lagi nya pa rin akong ginugulo at sinasaktan emotionally. At lagi nya pang ginagamit ang anak namin na panakot pag may gusto syang hingin or mangyari, tinatakot nya ako na kukunin at ilalayo na nya ang anak namin. Kahit di nya kaya itong buhayin, ni sarili nga nya di nya kayang dalhin eh.

    He loves nobody but himself.

    I know in my heart that I have Christ in my life… pero facing a difficult man like him makes me think… what is this for???

    Brothers and sisters in Christ… please help me pray that I would see God’s Light in all of these.

  233. i surpassed already that supahmega challenging one…..to describe her…well, she just wanted you to stay beside her most of the time and making you her E.A…Executive Alalay!!!!!!hahahaha, seems to be funny…extremely not….for almost 6 years that we had been together…felt like working for her….yeah to her that was the way she treated me as her friend…that was really so sweet…for i guess she outwitted me and took advantage of my innocence…..controlling my emotions, dominant, never ever wanted to be corrected, i was terribly enslaved by her…..moreover, was not even given a chance to prove something to her and take consideration about my feelings when humiliated in front of others and despite all of what i had been through i alone loved and treated her as my personal mentor. Though i realized that my behavior was influenced by her, eventuallyi broke down my relationship to my family and friends….but still i fought for our friendship. But when everything turned into chaos, I made a final decision —to end up seeing with her… (thanx for the never ending stream of advices, love and support of my family)well from that moment i learned to live my own way…..i feel relieved…realize my sense of worth…..made humble reconciliation with my family..and i found me….but I keep on praying to GOD let her realize her weaknesses and wholeheartedly accept the frailties she has then make a change and most of all learn to love herself by total forgiveness to others…..I know she’s devout to HIM but there’s still lacking within her……… May GOD’s spirit send my love and thanks to my dear friend….

  234. The problem is not that difficult person, whoever he may be. The problem is you. If he or she is the problem because of him being difficult to deal with then your problem is permanent. The only thing you have control of is yourself. How you will respond to him? How you will react? How you will be affected? As long as you are the problem, there’s a solution for it because you can change how you will react. It’s not permanent just some temporary inconvenience.

  235. difficult person ? sa aming mag-asawa ako yon ! ewan ko ba, madalas ako makapag salita sa aking asawa na mga words na naiinis sya, minsan diko mapigil at gusto kong magsalita ng magsalita at pag naman nainis na si misis ko… kakalma na ko at sasabihin kong pabiro ” ma, pagsubok lang sayo yan kaya mo yan, tibayan mo loob mo.” ayun at di malaman ng misis ko kung tatawa o maiinis. ewan ko ba, di ko nagagawa ito sa ibang tao kundi sa aking misis lang. napakabait nya kasi at hindi mainitin ang ulo like me. madalas nagsosorry ako later sa aking pagiging difficult person sa kanya. natututo rin ako sa kanyang pagiging mapagtimpi at salamat sa Diyos dahil dito. sabi mo nga Bro. Bo, we nourish our wife, so kung ano sya ngayon ay dahil narin sakin noon at ngayon, nagiging magkamukha ang mag asawa later. ayokong maging tulad ko ang aking asawa. kaya iniiwasan kona ang pagiging mainitin ang ulo, nagiging mapagtimpi nako dahil ang asawa ko ang nagnonourish sakin, salamat sa Diyos ! iloveyou honeymommy ! its May 16 happy birthday !

  236. Thanks Bo., you see madami tlagang there are annoying person in my life,. she used to be a friend of mine, at first i really treated her right, i try to understand her, her resentment, angst, hatred and anger in life. But then, suddenly i noticed, nagbago ang pagtingin ko sa frend kong ito… nabuhay sa loob niya ang envy and rivalry. lahat na lang ng bagay ayaw niyang magpatalo.. She even hurt my feelings many times, and she made me cry, nasasaktan ako kasi dahil nagbago siya at hindi niya alam sarili din niya ang sinasaktan niya ng lubos.. I have lifted these feelings towards her, i have prayed to god also na i touched niya ang puso niya at maging totoo siya sa sarili niya at maging content siya sa mga nareresiv niyang blessings

  237. great blog!

    what a coincidence, just what I needed to read!

    I feel very blessed having read this. Thank u very much !

    “God knew everything that happened & all that would happen.”-from the autobiography of Hans Christian Andersen

  238. the most difficult person in my life should be my mom :( unfortunately, I don’t have an ideal relationship with her, I have difficulty relating with her. Growing up, I thought it’s because of my shortcomings, but apparently it’s not just between the two of us, but between her and my siblings as well.

    What special gift does this offer me? It makes me realize that I can do nothing more but to accept her unconditionally for who she is simply because she is my mom. This whole experience makes me appreciate the presence of my dad and aunt who never fails to fill the gap.

  239. The difficult person in my life is my ex bf. though i know how difficult he is, i still loved him so much, and maybe i still do. he knows how to get his way with me. he always leaves me feeling guilty, so in the end i always do what he wants me to do. He also blames me, my friends and my family for everything. i turned my back on most of my friends for him even if it killed me inside. when he cheated on me, he told me that it was my fault because my family didnt accept him.

    He always said:
    “Kung ayaw mo layuan mga kaibigan mo ako nalang mawawala!”
    “ang kitid mo naman, may nag i love you lang sakin nagagalit ka na!”
    “Kaya ko nagawa yung mga bagay na yun sayo kasi nasaktan din ako dahil d ako tanggap sa inyo.:
    “Madaming nagmamahal sakin at gusto ako makasama kaya d mo ko pwedeng ganyanin.”

    i know i should be treated better so i broke up with him. but now he wants me back. and he knows how to get me back just by making me feel guilty about everything. but im stronger now. but still i keep thinking how can i help this person. i know my love was not enough to help him. If i just erase him from my life, will that be right? i dont want him to feel bad about himself. i also dont want him to feel rejected. i dont know what to do.. i want him to feel loved because he had a difficult childhood. i want him to love himself but i dont want him to be arrogant. he’s arrogant to most of the people, including me, when i was with him, so a lot of people dont like him. But i loved him. how can i bless this person? what should i do?

  240. Difficult person… I have met many types of difficult person especially now that I am in an outsourcing company like some of our Clients whom we sometimes call Clients from hell. But eventually, since i am employed in a service company, patience should always be a virtue. However, if your boss is also a difficult person, working will be so stressfull na. He is a serious person, thou tumatawa naman pero all work kami. No time for teambuilding or other activities para maalis ang stress and he does not support such kasi expensive. Problem is turn-over is frequent and it has been hard to hire and train again and again, nauubos na kami and this situation is being blamed sa amin. I just hope and pray that our boss will realize that we are people, napapagod din.

  241. My older brother “Bong” was the difficult person in my life. He is mentally challenged and was diagnosed for schezophrenia since he was in the 7th grade. My mom told me it is because of taking drugs. When he was younger he would be violent and I would be scared out of my wits and hide whenever he would have his fits. My brother would be in and out of hospitals which was mentally, physically, emotionally, financially stressful for all of us in the family. More so for my father who took care of him until my father died june 2000. Then I took over the caring of my kuya Bong. The whole family agreed that I (the youngest) should take care of him since I was living at the family farm in Antipolo at that time. That was 5 years ago.

    I couldn’t complain but deep in my heart I was crying out to the Lord to always help me because I had to spend so much to maintain my kuya’s food and things he enjoys. My youngest daughter stopped school for 2 years because of that. I am not a patient person and I admit that I do blow my top when someone pressures me to do or to produce things I can’t afford. We would always end up fighting and I know I shouldn’t argue as he is mentally ill. The worst fight we had when my brother accused me of bringing him to the farm so that he won’t enjoy his life in the city. But of course it was not my fault and it was my mom’s decision (my mother is avoiding caring for him as she claims that she can’t handle my brother and is very stressful for her at her age). But as days went on I know that the Lord is teaching me one thing…to be patient and to love the unlovable…my kuya.

    My brother died in his sleep Jan 7, 2008. Until the last day I was there and I regreted having to be so impatient with him. I wish I could have shown more love and patience and understanding and not thinking of my own happiness. Now I learned to be more loving towards people who are so impossible to love. I learned to be more understanding towards my family, and my difficult coworkers. And I keep on thinking that maybe I’m difficult too and nobody’s telling me. Whenever I remember my kuya I would always be reminded that everybody deserves to be loved….even if they are difficult.

  242. My difficult person in my life is my ex bf. We’ve been together for almost 4 years. He broke up with me almost 2 years ago without any explanation but i dont chased him though i have the every right to know the truth. No communication at all.. Not long ago after our broke up i learned that he already had a gf. It pained me to death but still i don’t tried to talked to him about it. After 8 months i’m into a relationship too but it only last for about 3 months.. after almost two years of no communication with my ex, i was online then when he sent me a private message via ym. I talked to him as if nothing had happened and he too talked to me just like an old long lost friend. That was the start of our communication. And one day he asked me out but i refused coz i knew that he still have a gf. He would always ask me for a date but i kept on refusing until one day i said “yes”… We went to his apartment and i learned that his gf lived there also. I almost faint because of pain cos i knew i still love him. i still love him so much.. out of nowhere he brought up the topic of our past.. And i let “something” happened to us.
    I felt guilty because in this situation i am right now i am the bad person. ako ang KABIT or the third party. i felt guilty because i might ruined a relationship. relasyon na dating akin..
    after that night my ex alway asking me again na makipagkita and i really want too but it hurts me to think he have still an ongoing relationship with his gf and he never had promised me anything.
    Almost everynight i found myself crying and feeling sorry for my self. And i hated myself for letting him hurt me like hell.

  243. what if your husband is your difficult person in life?

    sabi nga nila if your meet difficult person in your way, nakaka encourage daw o di kaya nakakatapang… where married for 8 years na pero we stay together for 4 years cause im working abroad for many years.. our communication is almost everyday through phone or in net we usually did it… pero pag di ka makakatwag o maka pag online he is hell angry… if i have my dayoff i need to tell him everything who\’s with me, what i am wearing,where do i go…. mahal ko siya pero minsan nakakasakal. its too much already. kaya ako nag abroad dahil sa ganyan na talaga siya, i thought he would be change but nothing happen it getting worst as time goes by…… i trust him, i let him go anywhere he go, anybody he want to go with cause i have no doubt for him, but the trust i give him, he never give me… i am praying that he would change…

  244. 1) Patience

    2) Mastery over one self (they said that what you can’t stand about other people somewhat reflects your own characteristics that you don’t really like)

    3) Love (as a consequence of No. 2 because you begin to see the greatness in someone instead of his weakness/es and you begin to do something to help that person see that greatness in him as well)

  245. Hi Bro. Bo and the world….Believe it or not my husband of 9 years is the most difficult person I know. It\’s not easy to live each and everyday with someone, like what Bro. Bo. says, who is demanding, irresponsible, constantly angry, annoying, selfish and very negative. But with God\’s grace I learned to be patient, compassionate and very,very understanding. I now know the value of unconditional love because I didn\’t give up on him. God answered my prayers and He taught me priceless lessons that\’s why he gave me a testy partner. After all these years I have been blessed with miracles because of my patience and perseverance. Now my husband is not annoying anymore, he doesn\’t get angry very often, he\’s very responsible now and never so annoying anymore. He\’s now the man of my dreams, almost. He just has to stop being a spendthrift and start brushing up on his financial literacy. But who doesn\’t? Thanks folks! PLs. check out my website www.deathtomycreditcards.blogspot.com. Peace, WENKO;)

  246. to me I tried not to be bothered by anyone of them because I choose to be happy, and God is allowing me to know what I am doing.I pray to the Lord God to touch their heart to liken me and my works.They are helping me actually to do the best I can and showing me how I should deal with other people.

    Goodluck Bo, my best regards,

  247. hi bro. bo!

    ang daming comments =) …i would like to give my

    share too..naisip ko lang..mostly itong mga

    difficult persons na ito mga mahal natin,malapit

    sa atin or me kinalaman sa mga buhay

    natin…nagiging difficult lang sila kc emotionally

    they affect us…kc kung mga ibang tao lang

    yan..who cares di ba?

    bakit naman tayo magsasayang ng energy at emotions

    sa kanila?….pero bakit kaya sila they don’t seem

    to be affected…hindi rin kaya difficult person

    din tayo sa kanila..iba lang ang effect…mas

    handled lang nila…

    as in their getting in our nerves….pero ganun pa

    man…hindi natin mabitaw-bitawan…kc siguro

    nararamdaman natin na me responsibilidad tayo sa

    kanila…as in tulungan na maayos ang buhay nila…

    and in return they are helping us too…mahirap

    makita ang positive effect kung nasasaktan mas

    obvious ang negative effect….

    siguro rin dapat we should handle ourslef first

    before we can handle these difficult persons in our

    life…. :)

  248. I am in a cultural exchange program, and I have to live with a family. and they are Dutch. and for some reasons, they are the difficult people in my life. they treat me as their ‘yaya’ just as I was reading this blog, the daughter wanted me to get her ice cream in the fridge because she is playing board games and cant get by her own. even if I dont want to, i have to, because the mom even permits her daughter to ask me to do it. More often than not, they always see me as some kind of a ‘yaya’ rather than someone who wanted to learn more about their culture. I know this is the downside of these programs, and I accept that. But sometimes.they are getting into my nerves. Oh Lord, I am doing this because I love my family and I wanted to help them as much as I can. These people dont understand that. Nakakapagod din yung isaloob mu nlang lahat, pupunta ka sa kwarto mu at doon nlang iiyak kasi kapag naman sinabi mu sa kanila ikaw pa ang masama..at isusumbat sayo lahat naman ng hirap nila.

    Alam ko lahat my reason, and I know, the Almighty put me here, brought me here to be with this family for a reason.

    But sometimes..hindi ko tlga sila maintindihan.

    Thank You bro. bo.

    Bless us all guys.

    nie

  249. Through the years patience is a virtue I have learned to master, or so I thought. I have always taken compliments of being so patience to the point of getting “hambug” of it.
    God shook me out of my self-made-very-patient pedestal when I was asked to work with a very difficult supervisor. I get so upset thinking : how can he be in his position with all that salary and not knowing a thing about managing people or working the computers %&@…. while I , who am at the end of the food chain of our division, is basically showing him how to do his stuff!
    Then I get reminded of Jesus’ pain, nailed to the cross for me…..Thank you Lord for difficult people like me and this supervisor, thank you for humbling me!

  250. whew! difficult person im my life??
    my heart changes its beat the moment this person crosses my mind…
    I was a free-spirited guy, a happy-go-lucky person when i was in my younger years…i was the kind who didnt care much about the deeper aspect of life..
    To go straight to the point, the difficult person in my life is my ex-girlfriend. Why could she be when in fact i loved her so much before? we had a lot of dreams and i was holding on to marry her someday…but everything, our dreams, promises, shattered like a broken glass…i know we loved each other, we spent countless times together and everyday woudnt be complete if i cant see her.
    Until the unexpected take its turn..
    we broke up…
    it was a big adjustment for me on how to start life not thinking about the good memories we had shared…
    but i endure the pain because i TRUST GOD’s plan in my life..He just wanted me to become the person i am right now…
    My ex-gf, though i labeled as the difficult person in my life is also God’s gift just wrapped in not-so-bright wrapper but portrayed a precious gem deep within..
    That’s because i learned a lot from her, she had served as an eye opener to all my mistakes and shortcomings in life…
    When we were still on, i prioritized her over anything, not even my family took precedence over her and to make matter worst, i didnt have personal relationship with God. I prayed of course but its more on a recital basis..i knew God but not enough to claim Him as my ‘close’ friend…i didnt talk to God so sincerely and heartily before…i didnt considered Him as my confidant. And even my family just lied next to my ex when both demanded for an attention…
    I realized all these things when in the most painful circumstances of my life, He made me realized about the real purpose and on brighter aspect of life…Every thing is screened through God’s love because He loves us so much…HE uses her for me to be patient, more understanding, and more trusting to God whatever His plans are…When i encountered any person who went through the same experience as me, i started my story with her- the lessons that i learned, how God comforted me despite my lack of hope towards life that time, how i set my limitations after, how God changed me by using her as the instrument for me to wake up and realize my worth..
    and so because of that, i was changed for the better,
    and ever since God became my everything…

  251. Dear Bro. Bo.
    greeting to you and to all the people who connect on your website…..lahat na ata tayo ay myroon mga difficulty sa buhay..parepareho …but God Know that lagi ko nasasisip my dahilan ang lahat ng mga bagay na nabigay sa atin ang pinag darasal ko lang na makayanan ko at lalo pang kong lumapit sa kanya.God Bless Us All and more power..

  252. I have 2 difficult persons in my life, my papa and myself.
    my papa because he is alcoholic and he makes everything difficult for everybody in our family. no wonder why all my brothers grew up alcoholic as well and parang walang direction ang buhay. it so hard kasi parang walang katapusan ang pagdurusa, parang pasan mo ang daigdig especially for me dahil panganay ako sa aming magkakapatid.
    anyway, because of my papa i became a stronger person, more understanding, patient and more closer to GOD.
    the second difficult person in my life is no other than myself kasi minsan it is me who makes things difficult for myself. yung bang simpleng bagay lang e pinapahirap pa or minsan hindi mo alam ang gusto mo sa buhay, yung bang ano ba talaga ate!
    I think whoever is the difficult person in our life is just like a spice in our life just to make our life more meaningful and colorful and not boring and dull.

    May God bless us all!

    Happy weekend everyone!

  253. When I met difficult person, I treated him/her on my mind like a DOG… yes a DOG, coz dog doesn’t know what he was doing. He pee or POO on a carpet, he will bite you even if you feed him… he can be a monster anytime… but you can’t spank the dog, you can’t tell him this and that, if you shouted at the dog, he will just ignore it… In that way humans difficult attitude is easily to handle… they are like dog leaving you a poo! God bless you all and have a meaningful day!

  254. yep. these kind of people are really challenging and most of the time they just want to bring out the worst in you, isn’t it?well, what i usually do is i try to think what that difficult person is thinking or going through and whatever he does or did that ticks me off, i just brush it off.i calm myself down, take a deep breath and zip my mouth up if i can’t think of any good word to utter about that person.god bless to everyone!by the way, i just bought brother bo’s latest book, very inspiring and it somehow help me and my family cope with what we are currently undergoing right now.just wanted to thank him for coming up with such an inspiring book.it really is a retreat everyday if you follow brother bo’s instructions hehe…thank god and god bless again to all.:-)

  255. hi kuya bo,

    i don’t really have someone in my mind that makes my life difficult. although there annoying pipz, but they don’t matter coz i don’t took them seriously. hehehe. God bless you always.

  256. do you believe in witch crafts and sorcery and whatsoever forms of stuffs like that?.. i used to ignore thins like that but now, given this circumstance, i can’t say that witches are just superstitions..I BELIEVE in GOD that’s why i’m quite confused why HE is still not working on this.My friend (MR. P) is so good that almost all people likes him, all neighboring families too… and here comes the trouble …. a couple ( couple XY) envied Mr. P … until time came that couple XY asked someone to give my father an illness… they wanted to fill MR. P with debts so that he would end up poor with no good memories at all.. they’re so mean0… actually right now we were able to talk to 6 “magtatawas” or witch doctor or here we call it “mananambal” and they all said that Mr. P was that kind of illness that’s called BARANG (B) in our native tongue… i dont know how true but there were 6 of them,,they doesnt know that they are 6 of them whom we approached. after the first one said that it was B we searche dfor another that could heal him until we got 6 witch doctor and the 6th one is a faith healer witch doctor i think.. i cant posibly guess that you guys can undestand this but i wish u could…. right now i want to kill couple XY but i just cant cause i know revenge is not mine…

  257. yeah i think in anybody’s lifetime there is a difficult person. and that includes me. my husband of 25+ years has become the most difficult person in my life.but he was not always like that. it’s difficult but somehow i had to cope up.i am able to because partly we live apart as i work abroad and he is here in the phils. and because i have to, to be able to survive emotionaly for the sake of my only child and his family. besides, i have to think of myself too and my sanity. i get my strength from God as i have entrusted my life and my all into his hands. somehow i still hope for a miracle even if if it’s really a miracle that i need.

  258. Hello ,Bo.good day,my difficult person is my father,simula nung bata kami lasenggero na siya ,our family came from nothing,we dont have our own house then,pero ngayon dahil sa aming magkakapatid meron n kaming sariling bahay at lupa.Paggawa ng bahay o mason ang pinambuhay sa amin ng aming ama ,siya rin ang halos gumawa ng aming bagong bahay,pero bakit paggising ko s umaga, parang gusto kung sabitan ng bakal s leeg at itapon sa pinakamalalim na dagat ang aming ama,dahil sa marumi sa bahay at inis na inis ako kapag siya ay dumidighay sa harapan ko parang dragon na pula,napapahiya kami sa mga kapitbahay dahil humihiga na sa kalsada pag naglasing, halos araw-araw pa naman,advise mo Bo,my prayer is always constant every day,thanks

  259. Magandang araw po mr. Bo Sanchez. meron kasing difficult person na palaging nagdudulot ng kasamaan sa bahay namin, my older brother, the eldest yet i think his mind is too tiny because he always causes troubles in our house having conflicts w/ my father or my mother almost all of us inside our house. Kung sumagot sa magulang namin walang respeto all he thinks is of himself, ano kayang advice ang maibibigay mo po sakin. good day thank mr. bo kasi nakaka apekto sa mood ng mga tao sa loob ng bahay pati nga mga kapit bahay namin ehh nagrereklamo na po. salamat po ng marami !!

  260. I cant still figure out the real reason why my husband is womanizing. perhaps out of discontentment or out of immaturity. he is the most difficult person in my life that is so hard to forgive even if i already surrendered him to GOD. He had already promised not to communicate with his women but still he does and it breaks my heart that he cant get over them. im on the verge of giving him up coz its the only way for the children not to experience such pain as what i am going thru..This experience is really teaching me to stretch my patience and understanding. It is teaching me the gift of self-control. May GOD bless my husband and his women, as one of his women is chasing after him and doing everthing to break our 6-year mariage apart.
    Bo, thank you for this chance..

  261. Hi Mr. Bo Sanchez, I have a difficult person in my life…Well, I won’t meet him for a while because I just met him at my ojt…And my ojt is already completed…

    Why is he so difficult (person) for me? Well, it was my first time to encounter an annoying person at work…First time to be at an office setting…And there is still a someone (like someone from school) who keeps teasing and annoying me at that kind of setting, that I’m expecting to be a serious place!

    I just can’t understand him..Like he wants to be an awesome cool guy when he humiliates me infront of my other co-practicumers…And sadly, I reacted ill-mannered, throwing back sarcastic lines…

    One time I confronted him, telling him how he made me feel bad…Guess what, no comment! He just made a tisk like response…

    It was kinda a new lesson learned…The rating of my supervisor for the ojt was affected because of my poor relationship towards him…Kind of remorse that I hoped I was more patient and kind during those times…But it feels like there’s more to this insight…

    That’s all Mr. Bo Sanchez

    Good day and God bless Ü

  262. ay naku! sinabi mo pa.minsan naiisip ko tuloy pinaparusahan ako ng dyos sa mga taong ito.
    yes bro. bo there are a lot of people who are difficult to live with in the work place,in the house,etc.
    sa akin sa work place at sa house. maybe god is giving me all these difficult person so i would see the joy that are with me, i try reminiscing all the good things god is giving me when i am with them,sometimes i cry and ask god to give me more patient and more love and yes i admit it really,really makes me very,very mad at times that i don’t talk to them. i hope god understands.

  263. like them i also have a difficult person in my life…this is my neighbor who keeps on telling other people about me in other words “nanchichismis”.
    1 year pa lang kami dito sa place namin and sa kanya ako bumibili kasi may tindahan siya..lahat ng kailangan ko pati hindi ko kailangan basta nag-alok siya kumukuha ko as pakikisama and i thought kasi nakakatulong ako sa kanya sa ganung paraan pati mga anak ko naging service ng asawa niya school…i give up our school service kasi inoffe niya ang tricycle nilang bagong bili…although i know na may pagkachismosa siya kasi madami siya sinasabi sa kin about our other nerigbors but wala ako masabi kasi hindi ko talaga hilig makipagkwentuhan or tumambay…it only started nung magkaroon ako ng maid na pati sa maid ko kung ano-ano sinasabi niya about me so tinanong ko siya pero ayaw niya makipag-usap i even ask my husband to come with me to talk to her pero ayaw niya talaga so what i did si binayaran ko lahat ng utang ko pati mga di pa due tapos i stopped buying anything from her store mula nun pag may binibili ako sa mga naglalako may mga sinasabi sila na sinabi nya…iniignore ko lang lahat but minsan naiirita na din ako.kasi puro hindi totoo ang mga sinasabi niya minsan tuloy feeling ko napakabad ng tingin sa kin ng mga tao.
    hinahayaan ko na lang siya kung masaya siya dun but i pity her kasi hindi siya makatulog sa galit sa kin na hindi ko alam kung bakit kasi if i only knew kung ano ang kinakagalit niya i could apologize to her.
    that’s all bro bo and pls help me pray for this person for her to have peace of mind and more blessings to her.

  264. I work in a restaurant here in B.C., Canada. I have an elderly co-worker who is very annoying. Almost all my co-workers don’t want to work with her. Since I’ve learned to be patient with her, I was most of the time partnered working with her. I got patient with her because she’s happy with what she is doing and she laughs loud which is sometimes contagious. If she’s in dayoff the restaurant is like quiet. So for me she’s ok.

  265. ewan ko ba..me ka-officemate ako na napakainit ang ulo sa akin kahit ala akong ginagawang mali sa kanya. minsan nung kumakanta ako kahit mahina, sinabihan nya na nakakaistorbo daw ako sa lahat ng tao pero pag siya naman ang kumakanta(halos lahat ng kasama namin rinig na rinig ang boses nya)..to think, praise and worship songs pa ung kinakanta nya!!! Nakakaasar talaga kac ang sama ng ugali nya pero nakuha pa nyang kumanta ng ganung kanta…she’s just like the pharisees in the time of Jesus.
    Pero d nlng ako kumikibo kac kung aawayin ko xa, im just justifying na tama ung ginagawa niyang pang-aaway sakin.

    I also heard from my fren sa office na talagang mainit daw ang dugo ng ka-officemate ko sakin from the first time we met.

    I just prayed and humbled down, and guess wat, she had changed. D na nya ako masyadong inaaway.

    Thank GOD talaga!!!

  266. can it be myself, brod bo? because i made promises to myself and to my wife and kids but most of the time i failed and they are so depressed of me coz i can’t keep my promises.

    Patience is a virtue that can be rewarded to you because of those difficult persons that you encountered everyday in life. You can come across with them everyday in life as we travel our path.

    God bless and more power!

  267. my aunt. I’ll be having my wedding this June and I feel like she’s making “pakialam” on our post wedding plans like where we should live, etc. i totally want to ignore her everytime i see her. it seems like her concern for me is getting on my nerves already. i appreciate her concern but she has to understand that im capable of having my own decisions too. she even doesnt like the fact that i quit my job to pursue my career which i really want in life.

  268. OMG! this ust hit me! i just had an experience yesterday with this manager in our office. He annoys me so much to the point that i sometimes lock the door so when he arrives, he cannot enter our room (we’re on a same room you know :) ) hahaha! but i see, why he is difficult. because he has no kids. nada… kaya bugnutin sya palagi,MASUNGIT! but i got to be used to him most of the time. Minsan, iniisip ko na lang, bawal pumatol or lumaban sa matanda…ika nga sa BISAYA: GABAAN k! :)

  269. he’s my brother!evrything was already given him by my parents.he already finished college but until now, he doesn’t have a job. he is already turning 29 this september. imagine that! i usually pity my mom and my dad because he treats them like he’s the boss in the family. he shouts at them, disrespects them and even try to physically harm them, even me, who’s elder than him. i think he is the most evil person i met in my life! i do include him in my prayers. please help me pray for him. he’s one person who is so selfish and self-centered, very insensitive and impatient. i’ve never met anyone other than him. in fact, when you do good for him, he doesn’t return that goodness. he even treats you in a bad away while doing a favor to him. i’m really sorry for him. altho i’m not mad at him. thanks

  270. Dear Bro. Bo,
    The most DIFFICULT person in my life is the person I love most in my life. I tried to understand him in every and anyway possible because I love him. I am very much willing to give up everything for him, to give him the happiness that he is looking for. I thought I’m doing a good job, but in just one click, he just told me that he doesn’t love me anymore. That he is giving up and I am not included in his dreams anymore. I am very confused and in big shock. I thought it was just a dream and I pray to God that it is just a Big joke, that after a while he will call back and tell me that he is just joking. I know he is a difficult person from the very start, I made it a mission to understand him and help him in everything. But I failed. Up to know I don’t want to give on him, but he won’t let me. He never gave me a chance. I know that he have many fears, insecurity, and problems in life. That’s why i always try to be at his side and to help him. But know he is pushing me away and i don’t know why. It seems that he is treating me as enemy. I really can’t understand him. I want to be a part of his life especially in this moment of his life but he keeps on pushing me away. i already tried talking to him but it is useless he just gets angry or get irritated. What will i have to do Bro. Bo? Do I need to let him go and be by himself? i always pray for Him.

    thank you so much.

  271. yeah.. i meet mean and difficult people every now and then.. when i was in college(i was a first year student), i have this classmate who does’nt have a filter in his head. he would tell almost everything that pops up in his narrow head. he does’nt care if what he says would hurt or aggravate someone around him.. and unfortunately, i had firsthand experience the devastating meanness of this person.. and we almost have this fight, like square battle along side of the road opposite our school.. but i gave up.. i was even the first one to say sorry.. i felt so stupid..

    i did not do that because i got scared of him. figuratively, i did’nt throw in the towel.. i just thought i don’t like to become famous for pulling a fight with a classmate near our school..

    anyway, i could go on and on.. but my point is, i just don’t like poeple who just say anything that they wanted to say.. i mean, we always have to consider the situation we are in.. then maybe, we can weigh down how we are going to act accordingly to the situation..

    people like my classmate taught me not to become like them.. i don’t wanted to become their subject so i would never ever do the same thing to other people..
    we have to grow up.. by doing so, we should be more mature and responsible to everything that we do..

    and to the Lord i pray, please bless me with enough patience.. and ofcourse wisdom..

  272. it is part of every person’s life that he or she meets a difficult person. it is God’s way of testing our patience and understanding. of all the people i have met in my life, i have learned to be non-judgmental. every person has his/her own issues and what we just need to do is learn to listen, understand, and be open to the situation of that person. we also have our flaws and i guess in one way or another we too have been a difficult person to somebody at one point. so i guess the next time we meet a difficult person let us see them in a different light and pray for more patience and understanding.

  273. Bro. Bo,
    Yes, ived met different people abroad w/ difficult personalities, but w/ Gods grace since i was in the SFC community i could be able to handle it, God gave me the patience and self control to ignore them, lalo na’t kasama ko rin siya sa community, she is my friend and she have this hot tempered personality, konting bagay lang na hindi niya magustuhan, sumisigaw siya at sumasagot ng pabalang, She wanted to say what she wanted to say, she did’nt realize na she is hurting the feelings of others.But thanks God gave me patience how to handle a person w/ difficult personalities.Thaks again bro, and may God continue to bless this site to help others who are in need of spiritual nourishment.

  274. Hi brother BO, actually its my first time writing to you. I hear your name from a friend of mine until then i was curios who was this person. So when i go to a national bookstore i saw your books displayed one thing i suddenly recognize is the name of the author in a big letter BO SANCHEZ. So i decided to scan the book and just by scanning it i get interested with the book so i buy it. And now i almost have all your books in my mini library.
    My difficult person in my life for me is my father because he always go to cockfighting and always get drunk anf if he was drunk he will get to fight with my mother and sometime with us. My parents are both farmers and when i was young i didnt enjoy being a child as young as i can remember i think 6 years old we are force to work in a farm as early as 6am. So when i graduated from elementary i came here in cebu to find a work and luckily i was accepted to work as a salesclerk in a hardware with the help of my cousin at the age of 13 and every month my mother come to get my salary and sometimes i advance my salary to my boss in order to give them and sometimes i hear the bad news my money used by my father in order to play the cockfighting activity until now my father didnt change. So i consider him as a irresponsible father and he is the difficult person in my life…

  275. amazing how many of us come across different experiences that annoy us but also teach us to HOLD ON to our FAITH….

    just last niight, I nearly killed a patient (it doesn’t sound right but it’s true)….he’s an ultimate BULLY!!!! - big time bully!!!

    he started complaining about their country not able to supply enough nurses locally because “apparently” it’s so hard dealing with foreign nurses because of language barriers( maybe he’s not well oriented that their country is so diversed that you see foreigners more than the locals hahaha) …then he told me that I should talk like them, think like them and care like them ( as if mas caring sila sa mga PINOY!!! duh!!!!)…and he was trying to convey that because I am in his country, my rights has been eradicated (not when you’re stuck in a hospital bed with both legs amputated )…and he was not talking at all, he was SHOUTING…he’s not confused (to justify his rudeness)….he’s just being HIMSELF!!!like ypu’ve said - pathological human being!!!!

    see, I had the chance to make his stay in icu longer with a 10-hour agony under my care…but I didn’t…i started feeling a lump in my throat and about to burst into tears…this is my downfall - i am not assertive ( or is it a gift? i don’t know!!!).. then I prayed…and GOD gave me the courage to say things nicely but made him realized that he did something wrong…what a relief!!!!

    i may not be assertive enough to defend myself but i develop a complete dependence to GOD that gave me courage to work with passion…

    thank you Bro Bo…you’re a blessing!!!!

  276. my aunt’s husband is the difficult person in our family. we are all affected since my aunt and cousins are now hurting because of his not-so-illicit affair, AGAIN! his first affair happen before his youngest son was born, 12 years ago. the woman was his own sister-in-law. he left his family but beg to be accepted again. we thought he changed for good but 10 years later, he has another affair. he is such a pain in the butt bcoz he is so makapal, flaunts his affair in our faces (still says we don’t have evidence that he is having one), irresponsible, does not even provide for his family. when he was drunk, he even called my aunt “madz,” the name he calls his woman. he wont leave his family coz he knows he cant financially survive without my aunt. my aunt does not say anything, does not fight against him. i guess, she has grown flaccid over time. i can’t blame her, maybe he has made her so small as a woman that she is so afraid, afraid for her live and her children’s. my cousins are angry and now rebellious to their father.
    we would really, really want to help my aunt and cousins before things will get worse. for us, my aunt’s husband only got two choices: to change as a better man or to leave his family for good.

  277. The person that I find difficult at this present moment is nobody but myself. I find myself very annoying, very irresponsible, and very stubborn. I have this tendency to make other people’s lives and my life miserable and I hate what I have become. Currently, I am a bum, just staying at home and watching TV, I can’t even do my tasks and house chores. Its really terrible, I do not like what is happening to me and I know only I can do something about this. I am really praying hard to our Lord to help me, to change me, to help me help myself. I want to be a better man, I want to be a blessing to other people instead of being a curse. I want people to see God in me, that whenever they see me, they will see God. It may sound funny but the difficult person in my life right now is myself.

  278. thanks bro bo for this article…as always you are a blessing thru your wisdom.

    i believe that everything happens for a reason, for a purpose - for His purpose. So, difficult people are His instruments, hard as it is to accept. His ways are not our ways and His wisdom we can never fathom.

    They are our crosses and our stairway to heaven.
    and the vitrues (patience, understanding,etc) that comes when we try to deal with them in a Christian way will benefit us the most because it is the Holy Spirit’s gifts that we put into use.

    And most often than not, these difficult persons have “baggages” that make them “sick.” They have so many hang-ups that make them bitter and act that way, hurting other people unknowingly in the process.

    i have read that : “People need loving the most when they deserve it the least.”

    God Bless!

  279. Difficult person.

    Lahat naman nagiging difficult sa pakiramdam natin.Marami tayong nami meet o nakapaligid sa atin ang difficult ispelengin ika nga.Even my own husband.Mainitin ang ulo at hindi broadminded.Walang diskarte at abilidad sa buhay.Imagine,for 8 years naming pagiging mag asawa,ako lang ang kumakayod sa amin.Buti na lang isa lang ang anak ko,pero lahat iyo kinakaya ko for my son.Ang LORD lang ang nagbibigay ng lakas at biyaya sa akin.

  280. hi kaye. i totally understand how you feel, because i am experiencing a hard time as well. nearly the experience you are undergoing.take courage and be strong. i know you still love the guy, but ignoring him is not the answer. take courage to confront him.hindi para awayin pero ipakita ang tunay na pagmamahal. be firm but sensitive. for me, you just have to learn how to put limits. he has to change for himself and not for you, remember that..may kailangan siyang ayusin at iyon ang sarili nia.Have patience whenever he makes you feel guilty, but definitely not give in to wat he wants, which is to bring you back. he has a lot to fix.aniwei, i must say that your love will be enuf, you just dont feel that it isnt enuf, because you are loving the wrong way. let your love make him realize that he needs change for himself, and for him to give you the right love you also deserve. and you can be an instrument. how are you going to that?i have no answer, but try to talk to him in the most sincere way you know. just tell him what you think of him, and what a great man he is in your eyes only if he could realize his mistakes. tell him his weaknesses and his strengths and let us see how things will improve. Endure it gladly. if he comes back a changed man, and the love is still burning, i wil be more than happy. i will be praying for you.

  281. Hi Kuya Bo!

    You know what, i was really frustrated reading all the comments here, its all very heart-breaking…

    Parang di ko maisip na meron palang mga tao na ganon nalang kadali saktan ang tao, or in the sense that they never treat the person with respect and so its very degrading to the aggrieved person…

    alam nyo po kuya bo, mostly sa nababasa ko were pertaining to the UNFAITHFULNESS OF THE HUSBAND to their wife….

    I am so sad reading all those articles thinking and wondering if TRUE LOVE does exists…

    Or aside from few good men, are GUYS intendedly made by God just to become a very DIFFICULT PEOPLE in WOMAN”S LIFE??

    as far as i know, guys came first in the bible, and later it was then that God realizes that Man needs a partner and so He created a woman out of man’s ribs-to be loved and to be treated with due respect and care…

    Pero Kuya Bo how come po na most men are deteriorating the worth of a WOMAN by either EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL, AND PSYCHOLOGICAL ABUSE…

    its very heart-breaking lang po reading all those stories despite sa sacrifices and faithfulness any woman hold on to just to keep the verge of marriage or love burning…

    I always dream of having a happy family someday and each time i read some awful stories of husband’s infedility, i almost questioned God’s plan.. i know its not proper to question GOD, pero minsan di ko lang talaga maiwasan na matanong kung bakit meron pang ganyang mga circumstances sa mundo,,, binabasa ko lang ha pero prang alam ko kung gano kasakit yon…para pong dinudorog ang puso ko each time i see someone going through the same thing…

    In my life’s journey, I considered God as my friend who constantly look after me throughout the good times and the bad times…and kahit anong pagsubok na minsan gusto ko ng sumuko dahil sa sobrang sakit, di ko ginagawa because i TRUST GOD’s PLAN in my life…HE ALONE can complete me…minsan i even complained to HIM and almost gave up my faith and trust but i just cant, my heart tells me to HOLD ON TO JESUS since i know deep within me that GOD continue to love me and HE just want me to become the person HE wants me to be….I know His plan might not be the one that we expect but its always THE BEST for us…

    The difficult persons in my life are any people in this world who has nothing to do but be a difficult person themselves…

    And it made me:

    1. Trust God’s heart even if sometimes i dont understand His plan
    2. Become a better person and helped other’s hold on to God’s perfect plan
    3. Become more stronger
    4. become more patient and understanding to other
    5. Grab the opportunity of influencing these person’s lives by inculcating in their minds and hearts about the goodness of God

    So i hope that even though there are people whom we considered as “the difficult person” in our lives, this will even strengthen our faith and trust to God…

    There are times when God uses even the most painful circumstances of our lives to DEEPEN OUR RELIANCE ON HIM….

    everything is screened to God’s perfect love…

    sometimes TEARS are telescope to HEAVEN…we just have to remember that the pain we feel does not even stand equal compared to the PAIN GOD FEELS when some of His people turned their backs on HIM…GOD considered us all His friends but some are not just willing to befriend HIM and its very heartbreaking and frustrating compared to the feeling of rejection we encountered on just a few people in our life…But we are still lucky because Jesus never fails us, He continually offers His love, care, and comfort to us when we grew weary because of the misery that life brings…

    How about us??

    Did we ever consider how God feels when we dont even recognized Him during those times when HE WAS STANDING BESIDE US WITH HIS ARMS WIDE OPEN telling us to love HIM too??

    When we feel so complete and happy with our life, we tend to forget the real person behind our success and hapiness…we tend to forget Jesus…so when we encounter difficult persons in our life we just have to remember that GOD feels double or thrice the pain when we also act like a “Difficult person” to God…

    But despite that, no matter how we disappointed God, He patiently seeks and make ways for us to be with Him in His kingdom when the right time comes….

    Pls give me some comments too..God bless us all…whatever happens..Just DONT GIVE UP ON GOD because HE NEVER GAVE UP on us no matter how much pain we brought to Him…

    Just talk to God, HE LISTENS to your heart..

  282. hello bro. bo,

    i even ask God why there are people who are difficult to understand.You know what, how hard it is for me to accept when people make up stories about me. Especially if it involves my dignity. I only cried when I hear something bad. I told myself that if only God will show them the CD or the DVD of my life then they will no longer make up stories.But I trust the LORD that someday God will knock at their head and realized that truth will always come out. I prayed for these people to change their bad habits. As what you’ve said, STAY AWAY FROM TOXIC PEOPLE.Continue to be a blessing to everybody.GOD BLESS.

  283. I have a co-teacher who is a front and back stabber. I know that she does it not only to me but to many colleagues as well. Many hates her. She report negative things to our administrators about us and she definitely convinces them. That’s the hardest part because our efficiency is being evaluated at the end of each school year; and this greatly affects our rating. She is very good in teaching and is now promoted as a coordinator of one subject area. Many knows that she is so much “sipsip” to our admin before her promotion. She always give something to them (no occasion), specifically food, which I think made her so “malakas” to them. I’m sure the admin have been hearing so many negative things about her behavior but their ears were closed. Bakit gano’n? ‘pag siya pinapakinggan, kami hindi. There was a time I confronted her about something. She can’t admit her mistakes, and she tries her best “na itama ang mali”. And the more she continues backstabbing me to our admin. She tries her best “na hanapan ako ng butas”. I’m so much affected and I fear also that my efficiency rating will really go down because of her. I realized also that our admin are unfair and one-sided. I’m working with no peace in my heart. I’m a very efficient teacher ‘di naman sa pagmamayabang. Pero lakas talaga ng impluwensiya niya sa admin. I have asked God before to help me love this person. I’m trying pero ang hirap talaga, sobra! Kaya ngayon ‘di lang siya nagpapahirap sa kalooban ko, pati na rin ang admin. I don’t want to resign because I love my students, my colleagues, and the school. What gift does God want to give me? I’ll wait for your reply Bro. Bo. God bless.

  284. Dear Bo,

    Your questions made me really think, it’s very timely that I do find myself most f the time alone because I don’t want to be with people that would cause me heart aches. And with those times that I am alone I talk to God and I feel happy… I think that’s GOD’s gift to us to be able to find HIM as out true BEST FRIEND, and by communicating with HIM we are able to understand people around us. Difficult people at times make us exercise patience and understanding which I believe are lessons that we shouls learn here on earth to be bale to make this world a better place to live in. I am excited to read your answers about GOD’s gifts. Thank you Bo.

  285. Daphne, on May 17th, 2008 at 11:01 pm Said:
    I have a co-teacher who is a front and back stabber. I know that she does it not only to me but to many colleagues as well. Many hates her. She report negative things to our administrators about us and she definitely convinces them. That’s the hardest part because our efficiency is being evaluated at the end of each school year; and this greatly affects our rating. She is very good in teaching and is now promoted as a coordinator of one subject area. Many knows that she is so much “sipsip” to our admin before her promotion. She always give something to them (no occasion), specifically food, which I think made her so “malakas” to them. I’m sure the admin have been hearing so many negative things about her behavior but their ears were closed. Bakit gano’n? ‘pag siya pinapakinggan, kami hindi. There was a time I confronted her about something. She can’t admit her mistakes, and she tries her best “na itama ang mali”. And the more she continues backstabbing me to our admin. She tries her best “na hanapan ako ng butas”. I’m so much affected and I fear also that my efficiency rating will really go down because of her. I realized also that our admin are unfair and one-sided. I’m working with no peace in my heart. I’m a very efficient teacher ‘di naman sa pagmamayabang. Pero lakas talaga ng impluwensiya niya sa admin. I have asked God before to help me love this person. I’m trying pero ang hirap talaga, sobra! Kaya ngayon ‘di lang siya nagpapahirap sa kalooban ko, pati na rin ang admin. I don’t want to resign because I love my students, my colleagues, and the school. What gift does God want to give me? I’ll wait for your reply Bro. Bo. God bless.

  286. Hi Brother Bo, I feel so relieved when i read “Do you have a difficult person in your life?”…thank you so much…Its been almost a year and half with my immediate boss. She’s the type of person that doesn’t work in the field(but we are field sales person), she always send emails to our assigned locations. At first, i dont think it was effective, just sending emails and doing the paper works, it’s also important to say hi and hello to all the staffs and sales force also…But for me, since she’s not that kind of person, i thought of something else. I need to go beyond and reach out to our people. What i did is that i worked and worked…after a year we have received many awards and recognitions…i know it’s not my boss’ effort/leg work(coz i do the leg work), wla naman kasi mangyayari kung magcocomplain ako and negative pa sa kanya…i take all the challenges, kung ano gusto nya data, i always make sure that i gave it to her…dun ako natuto…sa mga inuutos nya etc.ang dami di ko mabilang…lagi ko iniisip na”it’s for me and it’s for my benefit”…and it is…positive and i ranked #2 pa…di man #1 sa whole area but the fact na makasama ako sa top…that’s really somthing di ba?…and im praying for her…no matter what…naniniwala ako na kaya sya anjan at ganyan ang kanyang attitiude or diffiult sya it’s because there’s a purpose…god is telling/showing us na even if we have difficult person, he make sures that we will be the one to benefit with these people…

  287. yes, i do have difficult persons in my life now, its the family of my husband, since i and the kids are living with them right now without my husband who works abroad. Its difficult, the usual silent cries at night (kasi iisang kwarto din kami ng biyenan ko babae). Kasi they treat me kasi as if I am boarder sa kanila, no matter how I tried to please them and understand them, they see me as if i am a different person. Specially now that my husband is in abroad lalo bumigat ang burden to please them, instead of helping me to direct me how to save or put the money into investments, they are complaining that kukunti lang ang naiibibigay ko sa kanila.

    With these difficult persons in my life right now, inspite of the pain, cries everynight, one thing is really sure.. It made me more closer to God and more on relying to HIM… I pray that we may able to overcome these.. God bless us all…

  288. hi there bro. bo..
    i think those gifts are: deepen our understanding and love and to lengthen our patience..
    i was really happy when i read your topic “Do you have a difficult person in your life?” Im happy because i can really relate on the topic. For four years now, im living all alone here in manila.(actually i came from davao city). im used already that everyday all i have to do is to take care of myself and nothing else, not until my brother came from davao. My mom decided to sent him here because she wants my brother to stay away from his bad friends who taught him how to drink and got drunk, how to puff a cigarrette and worst is they taught him how to take illegal drugs like shabu and the like. So, from the moment he came here, my world was shaken, every now and then i get angry with him, everyday we fight because he doesn’t want to follow me and obey my rules, he doesn’t help me do the household choirs and everything. i should say he is a completely pasaway. a stubborn! i ask God to help me lengthen my patience and understanding but most of the time i get easily angry with him. in fact right now i am so angry with him, that i can’t help myself not to curse him because he had stolen my money and that money is intended for the payment of our electricity and water consumption. i really don’t know what to do with him bro bo. im loosing hope.
    please help me.

    thank you very much..
    God bless us all.

  289. dealing with close-minded person/s is really difficult.
    sa pagdadasal nga, nabubuksan ang isipan at puso ko.
    napapasama pala ako sa kanila. I am playing God when I get very impatient and I can’t stay calm.

    in the long run, it is God’s call which will prevail.
    always.

  290. hi bro. bo,
    just a comment— i think i got to change my pen name as star, kasi, mayroon akong kapareha above, ha ha.
    thanks and God bless!
    strel

  291. God’s greatest gift to us is LIFE..and within this precious life is God’s greatest sign -HIS LOVE. I believe that we are created equally by GOD. God did not create monsters or killers to wreck havoc in our lives..Part of living life are the REALITIES that exist in this world.These realities may cause us pains and leave wounds in us..These wounds are the reasons why some people are difficult to be with..These could be their way of enduring the pain and putting up a perfect self..or simply surviving life with these wounds..all of us are wounded but some of us are lucky enough to transcend beyond our woundedness..if we are able to do this we become wounded healers (borrowed from Henry Nouwen)..we help heal others although we are wounded too..Our woundedness becomes our source of healing for others..Like Christ..HE is the greatest wounded healer..

    i have my own share of difficult persons, too. and most of the time they consume my energy..nakakapagod talaga..pero si Jesus ganun din naman nangyari sa kanya..mas masahol pa..i think part of God’s mission of becoming a man like us is to show us an example of how to live life dito sa mundo…para di natin masabi na puro Theory lang si God..ayan isinabuhay din nya mismo yung tinuro nya sa mga propeta at mga guro b4 na nauna sa kanya..

    Naalala ko minsan sinabi ng bosing ko, si Dr. Tony, if ever na me difficult person daw sa buhay natin our immediate reaction is, ” Bakit nya ito ginagawa sa akin? ano ang kasalanan ko?!!!!!” pero pwedeng ganito ang tanong natin, ” Bakit nya ito ginagawa sa sarili nya? ano ang mga sugat sa puso nya? “

  292. To nalilitong utaw!
    wow!
    i was surprised to have 34 messages or comments on your article difficult persons in our life in my mail.you see i just made a comment yesterday on the persons who are at the moments making my life miserable,so i made at once my comment to release my anger and dismay.
    i remember my mother in law yesterday and i was writing a comment on the topic but power failure stop me from doing so ,i thought god must have given the situation so i won’t dwell on my past hurt anymore.
    But today i got the time to read all the messages of our readers and found out that almost of our experiences are almost the same,our difficult people are either our boss,which was my difficult person when i start my work in the school that i was assigned,during that time i would say to my friends” NAKU SA UGALI NYA KAHIT PINAGNGUYAAN KONG BUBBLE GUM DI KO IBIBIGAY SA KANYA, sana buhay pa xa, ganyan ako kagalit sa ginagawa nya sa akin,i stopped seeing her when i left my job,she would comment even with my relationship with my husband making nasty comments on the way i handle my married life.my husband asked me to stop working because i am being affected by her that i had 3 miscarriage.That must be god intervention to elevate me from my sufferings, that’s what i thought,but god had another plan,since i am now a full time mom i have now time to be with in laws and my god how i wish i did not follow my husband,because this time it is my mother in law who became my most difficult person in my life,and alam mo nalilitong utaw? wala yan sa ginawa ng mga in laws ko sa akin,sisiw kung baga,sa akin,isipin mo lahat yang ginagawa sa iyo,dagdagan mo ng bintang ng panlalake,imagine teacher ako naisip nila yun sa akin?ihumiliate sa mga friends nila,wag ipakilala habng pinkikilala lahat ng family members sa harap ng maraming tao,ay sabi ko pala baka gusto ng dyos wag ko imention lahat yun pero para lang mai compare mo life mo sa dinanas ko,mention ko yung mga natatandaan ko pa yung iba nakalimutan ko,wag alukin ng pagkain maghapon at sirain ang reputasyon ko sa asawa ko,kausapin ang karetero na ibigay sa kanya ang mga sulat ng asawa ko at wag ipadala ang mga sulat ko sa asawa ko,ma took mo yun?hangang ngayon siya pa rin diificult person sa buhay ko,pero bakit nakalimutan ko kahapon?God is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good,he gave me a community that had prayed for me to be able to cope up with the situation.lalo ko minahal ang asawa ko na napakabait, kabalitaran ng ugali ng nanay nya at nga ate nya.di ko tiningnan gingawa ng byenan at mga anak nya kahit ang hirap hirap struggle talaga,di lang luha ang tumulo sa akin sipon,laway,dugo sa kunsumisyon na naramdaman ko sa kanila. di ko rin pinaalam sa anak ko ang nararamdaman ko kc ayaw kong madevelop sa anak ko ang galit.Natapos ang hirap ko ng minsan magdala kami ng regalo sa bahay nila sa cavite, (pasko kasi gusto ko maging maluwag loob ko dahil pasko )di kami pinapasok para kaming tanga sa labas nakatingin lang xa sa amin tapos sinisilip nya kami ng mga anak ko sa labas,biro mo magdamag kaming nagbalot mag iina,at iomagine from pampanga umalis kami ng 4 am para lang magbigay ng ragalo,nakita ito ng mga anak at sabi nila “ma alam ko gusto mo maging mabuting kristiyano pero di rin siguro masaya ang dyos na nakikita ka nyang mukhang tanga at ginagawang basahan ng mga taong minamahal mo,”naisip ko nga yun,ginawa ko iniwan ko na ang pagpupumilit na maha;lin nila kami,pinagdarasal ko araw2 sa dyos sila,sa lahat ng pwede kong pagdasalan sila ang una kong ipinagdaeasal,at nagulat na lang ako isang araw pinapatawag ako ng byenan ko at mabait na sa akin ang mga in laws ko,siguro minsan tinuturuan din tayo ng dyos ng mag let go n let god,i became prayerful and forgiving at walang kaplastikan namahal ko ang byenan ko in god’s heart kc kung puso ko lang ang aasahan ko di ko kayang gawin mahalin xa,hangang ngayon me mga ugali pa rin sila n di ko matake but i don’t sweat the small stuff ang tinintingnan ko ang naging reward ng dyos sa akin.ako pa rin ang babae ng asawa ko at wag mong isipin na di kami nag away ng asawa ko dahil sa ina nya,3 beses ko hinamon ng hiwalay ang asawa ko.at ang mga anak ko napakababait mahal na mahal ako.
    nagpapasalamat ako sa dyos dahil tinulungan nya ako malampasan yung pinaka mahirap na parte ng buhay ko kaya ngayon madali ko rin maiwagwag ang mga gingawa sa akin ng mga taong nag papahirap sa buhay ko,kasi i am fulfilled with my family they are my priceless possesion and god’s gift,so whatever difficulties i am suffring or i am encountering i share it with them and they give me wisdom when i am empty with mine.
    nalilitong utaw salamat sayo at ke bro bo sa espayo at time sa pagbasa nitong sharing ko.

  293. I have an unfair share of difficult perople in my life. And I don’t understand God’s wisdom in it. At first, He gave me my mother. I suffered a lot from her. Growng up, I was beaten and abused verbally. It took a really long time for me to put up with the pain and forever will be haunted by the effects it has caused me. I thought of suicide when I was a teenager but stopped myself thinking that things might change for the better. But I was wrong, my mother continued to abuse me verbally and hurt me physically when she is angry. Now that i’m 27 years old, I could say that I am not a fully functioning human since I have so many fears. It’s keeping me from becoming a fully functioning human being. I’m so afraid of so many things. The pain that this difficult person has caused me is so great that It gave me anxiety disorder. Had there been a gift to this terrible experience with this difficult person, it would be learning to ask for God’s wisdom on His purpose for giving me such a difficult person, and preseverance (some people aren’t as persevering as me, maybe they’ll commit suicide had they been me)

  294. One doctor evaluated my performance. He took everything personal. I guess he hates me eventhough i didnot do anything wrong, he finds mistake on what im doing.I’m just a new employee trying to improve my skills, in addition some responsibilities were not endorsed to me by the previous worker. To sum up, my evaluation from my co-worker and other doctors were outstandingly good,however, maybe i wont be promoted due to his comments. I dont hate him though, He is always included in my daily prayer. He is a lonely person, no one likes him because of his personality problem. He needs understanding than criticisms.

  295. The most difficult person around me became my best friend.
    During my first week in my work. colegues informed me that I should not come near her because she is a very difficult person, palaging nagagalit at nagmumura. Unfornately, I was assigned to her buddy and as expected by everybody, I became a victim of her pagmumura. I just kept quiet and waiter for her to finish. Then, I asked her what I have done wrong why is she angry at me. She gave me no answer. I told her that I am a sincere and fair person, I don’t don’t judge a person by what I heard from others but with what I experienced with her. I also informed her that if she have a problem with me she is free to approach me and inform me immediately. She said “I am sorry” to me and that was the start of of our friendship. I came to understand that her atitude towards others were brought about by her insecurities, and she thought that pinagkakaisahan sya ng mga colegues nya. Now, she still suplada at times, but her heart if full of love and trust. God bless!

  296. i have this freaking old lady officer in the bank that i work on, she’s really very, very, very mean in its real sense, she’s retiring next month ( i hope so) and i really pray that God will allow her to rest in peace! just kidding, to let her rest at night with a sound sleep, not to wake up anymore! she annoys me, and i always ask God to grant me the gift of patience and the gift of wisdom to confront this hustles with a peaceful and joyful mind and heart. i also ask God the gift of discernment for me to do what is just, right and morally upright whenever i encounter such a kind of person. may God bless us all!

  297. I just noticed from everybody’s reactions on “having a difficult person in your life” Most of it is full of judgement. Majority of it is full of anger. I can feel the negative vibe just by reading it.

    I guess we are missing the point here. Has anyone thought about the principle of 100% full responsibility? The reason why we are surrounded with difficult people is because of our own doing. Hard to swallow but true.

    The things that we hate the most with another person is a reflection of our own selves. If you want to change you relationships for the better it should start from within. I don’t care if he’s your boss, wife, husband, neighbor, enemy, friend….the point is don’t even dare to try to change another person. Each person has a right to be what they want to be which is beyond our control.

    And to all those who have been a pain in the ass to another person…I Bless you…for if not for people like you I would not have the chance to see the beauty of other people in our lives.

    As the old adage says…you need to experience darkness to appreciate light….

    To everyone…Be Well…:-)

  298. hello po.
    Pangalawan sulat ko na 2 sa comment na one person difficult in life nasabi ko nga parepareho lang pero ibat ibang tao.sa pag babasa ko sa commet sinulat ko na rin kung sino ang diffult person sa buhay ko..hahahaha ang husband ko..my husband is a military man d ko pa nman nahuhuli kung my babae pero ang kinaiinisan ko ay ang bisyo nya sa sabong at barkada as in pag alng cyang pasok nasa manukan na cya don na siya kakain ng almusal tanghalian at madaling araw na kung umuwi mahirap sa akin 2loy malayo ang loob ng nag iisa nmin anak.kahapon b-day ko nag away kami kaya d kami nag kikibuan at bukas nman ay 17th year wedding anniversary nmin d pa rin kami nag kikibuan mas guto pa nya nya matigil sa manukan kaya mahirap para sa akin na my isang tao na daladala sa buhay dasal at dalagin ko na isang araw magising na lang cya na mali ang kanyang ginagawa..i hope and pray na makayanan ko tong lahat.God Bless Us all.

  299. difficult persons are people who do not know what they have… so we — ‘ the not-so-difficult persons’ must let them see what they’ve received and still am receiving…

    although i believe that others may see you and i as difficult persons altogether. ;p

    ikanga ng pari namin…. we perfect each other. ^_~

    kaya, steady lang. chill.

  300. it is my husband..
    my husband didnt know how lucky he is and hardly noticed how he treated me badly. all he do is complain, relax himself while im freaking stress and financially burdened. I never got any support for him and yet he compalins when I air my views on him…comparing to ladies he hate, blaming me why he is in such condition.
    sa kanya, suko ako! i can handle all the other difficult persons in my life with ease…except for him.
    if i can only throw him and ask him to get out of my life i would. i despise him and he brings out the worst in me…someone i could never imagine i could be.
    but honestly this diffucult person makes me whole.
    and maybe that’s Gods’ purpose. He sends difficult person in our lives so we’ll be reminded to pray, we’ll learn to be more patient and to be more loving as well.
    I believe God sended me to my husband to because he knew i could handle him. He send me my husband to perfect me as His creation.
    HUH!!!! positive thinking..im actually comforting myself because im in deep pain still…and im hoping that God enlighten him as well.

  301. difficult person for me is buong family ng papa ko..i want to send them the msg of NO TO GREED! & accept the fact that whatever they want in life will be given to them ONLY if they deserve it & worked hard for it.

    i know it’s not healthy, but i know in God’s perfect time i can forgive them.

    what they did to my family especially to my parents caused me so much pain.

    it’s never too late for whatever it is u want in life.

    i don’t want them to pass on to the nxt generation lahat ng mga pangit na ugali nila…nakakalungkot lng talagang isipin minsan na may mga taong ganung kasama ang ugali.

  302. i think God has a purpose why He is sending us difficult people to deal with….i too have my own share of bad experiences with really difficult people…they come one after the other or if talagang gusto ni Lord subukan ang patience ko…sabay sabay sila dumadating sa time pa naman na sobrang pressured ako sa mga activities ko sa parish namin…but just recently may dumating na really very difficult person sa buhay ko but can’t seem to avoid him…he is my ex-bf…after more than 10 years na kaming hindi nagkikita eh biglang sumulpot from nowhere…sobrang iba na siya..as in hindi lang 360 degrees ang pagchange niya sa lifestyle niya…masyado siyang nalululong sa material na bagay…sugal pati sobrang S E X…kahit yata sinong babae papatulan niya…even yung japayuki na may asawang hapon eh yun ang kanyang apple of his eyes ngayon…

    i could have ignored him totally…but i just can’t…not because that i still love him (of course nandun pa yun kahit papaano) but as a christian & servant of God, i want him sana to follow the right path…i’ve been trying to explain to him yung mga consequences but it seems ang kausap ko ay bingi…sabi niya lonely man siya since i left him (na siya rin ang cause ng break up namin about 14 years ago)…hinahanap daw niya ako sa iba’t ibang babae kahit 10 years ago ay he married his ex-gf(kasi nga requirement sa school ng mga anak nila)…now i’m so guilty na ako pa pala ang cause ng pagiging makamundo niya…ito lang daw ang outlet niya…bayaan ko lang daw siya…

    i don’t know what to do with him…please help me pray for his conversion..mabait naman siyang tao…i would not love him before if he wasn’t really good…nagkaroon lang kami ng problem kaya hindi kami nagkatuluyan but i assure you he is a good man…please pray for him…let’s just call him JIMI…he needs more prayers…thank you…

  303. Now that I’ve read all of the comments, I realized how lucky I am that the only difficult person in my life is just my boss, not a husband. At least ang boss madaling iwanan, madaling mag resign. Ang asawa hindi. I’m a 27-year-old single woman and I always find myself being bugged by my relatives to have a boyfriend. They tell me that my standards are too high. I guess it is, but I don’t to be stuck with a no-good-husband like many of the ladies above. Thank goodness I never listened to my know-it-all aunts!

    I noticed that it’s mostly the wives who complain. I guess most husbands are okay with their wives. Now, if only these men do their best to make the marriage work, hindi lang lalaki ang magiging masaya. Pati rin yong babae.

  304. Hi, i know this is a little bit out of context, pero i just want to say that i am so thankful for finding Bo
    Sanchez’ blogsite. I found it accidentally. I am a Bo Sanchez fan eversince i was in highschool, that was 13 years ago… my mom used to have a Kerygma subscription that’s why i always read his articles there,,, those inspiring articles…

    When Bo released his books, i also bought them and i sometimes watched his tv program if my time permits. Super inspired ako, in fact i even hoped before that i will end up with someone as smart, god-centered and funny as Bo for a husband… haha. Now, I’m already 28 years old, a lawyer, a mother and a wife, and yet i’m still a fanatic of Bo. Having found this blogsite is like finding a pot of gold for me.

    I’m certain that I will be once again enriched with his inspiring thoughts and words, especially now that i am no longer as prayerful as before… the demands of life prevent me from being focused to spirituality and that is something i really regret. I know this will help me.

  305. I don’t think I really have difficult people in my life. I am so thankful for God for this. I’m not sure though if the reason for this is because I stay away from them. I feel so blessed that I have that luxury, because they’re not my husband, nor my boss nor anyone I’m stuck with for good. I’m not sure though if what I’m doing, staying away from them, is the proper thing. Maybe I’m an escapist. Maybe I’m passing up the chance to learn life lessons from the experience of dealing with difficult people LOL When I see the signs of a difficult person, I don’t run away immediately. But I take note not to provoke them and try to keep them at arm’s length, maybe even try to win them over if given the chance. But if things turn sour, I just move on. I let time take over and heal wounds until the time comes that I can just look back and wonder what the problem was in the first place and just laugh about it. Life is short. =) Go get a dog LOL Surround yourself with things and people you love…

  306. hi bro. bo,
    just a comment— i can no longer be read as star ’cause there’s someone bearing the same name with me! ha ha.
    thanks…
    strel

  307. hi bro. bo,
    just a comment— i can no longer be read as star ’cause there’s someone bearing the same name with me! ha ha.
    thanks…
    star

  308. I have this officemate who has mood swings and unreasonable temper (to the max—–). An officemate who is very close with the boss . Though fortunately, I was a senior in the company than her, still I was never exempted from her fangs (yeah I think she have those). Weekdays, seemed like I tipped a finger in hell. Pity those subordinates who experience worse. I’m just happy sometimes that I could get back (usually when I reach my boiling point). When pushed to far, I retaliate with sarcastic remarks that somehow get through her. But sad to say she never apologize on those times, I am still the one who says sorry (with many protest from officemates) and take the first step to normalcy.

    I am a young servant in our community and during my cell meetings with my group she would always be my weakness and defeats for the week. This means I let Satan win ‘coz she made me tick to gossip, to hate her for making our office life HELL. Then I came to realize that this should never be a “cycle” for all of us. I began to befriend her to later know the many things she hurdled in her life. I listen and understood her for the first time. Little by little, I was able to make her realize and change a bit. She felt accepted. She now say sorry and could 70% control her temper. Maybe add to that change was due to her falling in Love.

    I remember once in my anger, I prayed to God that she would vanished from my sight one day and could never be heard of . Well, God really answers —- nope she did not die..hehhe she was transferred to another office. But we remained friends and I let her read this later on..LOLZ!!

    God works in mysterious ways and I thank Him forever for the things He allowed me to suffer..heheh este experience. I LOVE YOU JESUS!!!! God Bless to All of Us.

  309. Hi Bo,

    yes i believe most of us has a fair share of difficult person in our life and is the most painful truth is that this difficult person is the person we loved most in our life (well in my case my ex boyfriend), person who is so dear to us, who we think care for us, who we think will stand up for us yet they are the very person who betray us, the very person who inflict pain in us, the very person who hurt us more and leave a very deep wound in our core being, yes its hard to comprehend nor accept but its a reality and it leads us to prayer whether for blessing or for curse, yes sometimes a reality that we are not God or else patay talaga ang tao na iyan di ba? yet this very person bring to the realization of who we are, our personhood, our being…. if you ask me if this difficult person in my life i got over with, NO at this moment, i couldn’t ask God to bless him , i’m not ready yet i’m still in pain but i’m start to open myself to a reality that God is always there for me even in my helplessness, even when i fought Him, that God did not abandoned me even if i’m a nominal catholic (my ex boyfriend is a practicing catholic) that God’s love is equal, it’s still a far way to go, i just take one step at a time…

  310. Hi Bo,

    yes i believe most of us has a fair share of difficult person in our life and is the most painful truth is that this difficult person is the person we loved most in our life (well in my case my ex boyfriend), person who is so dear to us, who we think care for us, who we think will stand up for us yet they are the very person who betray us, the very person who inflict pain in us, the very person who hurt us more and leave a very deep wound in our core being, yes its hard to comprehend nor accept but its a reality and it leads us to prayer whether for blessing or for curse, yes sometimes a reality that we are not God or else patay talaga ang tao na iyan di ba? yet this very person bring to the realization of who we are, our personhood, our being…. if you ask me if this difficult person in my life i got over with, NO at this moment, i couldn’t ask God to bless him , i’m not ready yet i’m still in pain but i’m start to open myself to a reality that God is always there for me even in my helplessness, even when i fought Him, that God did not abandoned me even if i’m a nominal catholic (my ex boyfriend is a practicing catholic) that God’s love is equal, it’s still a far way to go, i just take one step at a time… but maybe im also a difficult person in other’s life in some way

  311. I am a happy person, very happy nowadays…no difficult person or no one can take that happiness from me… what I believe in ” Don’t do unto others, what you don’t want done unto you”, and everything follows…God bless everybody!!!

  312. yes bo… im in need of so much patience for several difficult people in my life. i dont know if they are really difficult or it is because i am going through such a rough patch right now in my life that i feel they become more difficult. when i was such a happy person i found it easier to be more patient, to be nicer, to be good. now that i am in so much pain, i feel my temper has gotten shorter, days aren’t as bright and i feel i just dont have the patience to put up with the difficult people around me as i used to.

    please pray for me?
    before it was my mom who was being difficult. she was so so against my relationship with my boyfriend (racial differences) that she made it very tiring and difficult for both of us.
    now my-now-ex is being difficult because he’s being cold and uncaring. i feel stupid. its so so painful because i still love him so.
    life’s hard enough as it is. difficult people make it harder.
    hay. everyone, please pray for me? i am praying so so hard for our love to be given a second chance. its so painful im so hurt. i sleep and wake up in pain. like a part of me died. Bo help!!! do you have upcoming retreats? i need enlightenment and a glimmer of hope that i do not see anymore. everything seems bleak though i know it shouldnt be with the Lord’s help…and ive been closer to Him through this hardship…i cry to Him almost every day

  313. We always meet difficult people and if we mind them so much then we will be affected. Thus what I do with difficult people is to stay away from them but if circumstances will not allow you to do that then we just go to be patient (they’ll teach us how to be more patient anyway, yes brother Bo may be right that’s one of their purpose in life) and pray for them. However when time comes that in a group you need to choose between the difficult person and another member you just have to make the right decision not anchored on the fact that the other one is a difficult person because it could be that he or she may be difficult but she did the right thing. Then settle the issue between them constructively.

  314. i think im a difficult person..but im trying to change though it’s hard to please everybody..maybe God made me that way.. how can that be a blessing?suggestion anyone?:) tnx

  315. ask ko lang cnu nakakaalam ng bagong sked ng KERYGMA TV?

  316. ask ko lang cnu nakakaalam ng bagong sked ng KERYGMA TV?
    hay di ko nanapapanood.

    I easily get depressed when I don’t get what I want. Like watching Kerygma TV. haha.

    parental issues?
    not really.

    Uhmm.
    In a nut shell, I, MYSELF, AM THE DIFFICULT PERSON IN MY LIFE.

  317. I encountered a difficult person today and he told me this…..

    You dont need GOD to be a good person.

    I was shocked and prayed that I may utter the right words to an unbelieving person.

    That person strengthened my faith and at first i hesitated to answer but God gave me enough wisdom and courage to stand for what i believe in. God gave me enough patience to control my emotions.

    I realized that we encounter people like this in our lives because its also an opportunity for us to touch their life and let GOD be known.

    Until now, I dont know if our conversation made a difference but I just talked to him without being judgemental and i told him il be praying for him.

  318. My mother, i don’t know for 3 consecutive weeks she’s always angry with me, yelling me, doesn’t look me in the eye, said worst things about me, i don’t know why she’s acting like that, sometimes i get tired of her, I don’t want to loose my love for her. Please Lord, continue bless her and guide me Lord God, help me to become more patient, humble and may the love conquer all. Thank you.

  319. difficult people are blessings in disguise. it could be a mystery to us why they are that way. but if we see through the problem, the truth is that God sent those people to us…for us…for our own good. they are the keys to knowing ourselves and knowing who God really is. their significance in our lives is also an invitation for us to pray more and love more.
    God bless all of us. Thank u Bo. Praise God.

  320. i have met lots and lots (and maybe tons) of difficult people in my life… But every now then, i still think that GOD has his own reason why he lets these kind of people enter our lives.. Like this supervisor i have, he always made me feel like i’m the dumbest person alive whenever he talks to me. one time, he told me “ang hina mo pumick-up” in front of my coworkers. para kong nanliit samantalang siya nga tong magulo kausap dahil kung san san sumeseg-way yung mga sinasabi nia. from that day on, i started to hate him….. SO MUCH to the point that sometimes, i want to curse him! haha! but eventhough he makes my life miserable, i learned a lot of things from my experiences with him. I learned to be patient… because once i’ve been a very impatient and irritating person. humaba talaga ang pasensya ko sa ugali nia! Nalaman ko rin kung gano kadepressing ang feeling if someone mades u feel na parang ang tanga tanga (forgive me sa word na ginamit ko) mo so i learned to be humble, kind and sensitive towards other people’s feelings… i learned to be careful with the words na ginagamit ko when i’m talking to someone… and the best thing is i’ve learned how to be strong kasi dati kapag nasasaktan ako sumusuko na ko agad… i realized na there will come a time that someone will enter your life para turuan kang maging matatag at tulungan kang tuparin ang goal mo… and ang lahat ng yun ay nangyayari because GOD wants us to learn the most important lessons in life and binibigyan nia na tayo ng chanc dahil sa mga experiences na binibigay nia satin… and so eventhough i’ve met the most as in pinaka super mega over MEAN na person in my life, feeling ko lucky pa rin ako to have met him and learn something from him…

  321. […]           Okay, that’s not true. Blog comments on the web don’t get wet. But I imagined that if they were written on paper, they’d look like used tissue paper after my wife watches a Bea Alonzo-John Lloyd telenovela. (You can read the flood of comments in my previous post, Do You Have A Difficult Person In Your Life?) […]

  322. Hi Bo! i think God has only one reason why He put difficult persons in my life and that is to teach me PATIENCE! I’ve always been an impatient person… ever since I was a kid and until now that i have my own kids. I especially find it hard to be patient with people who have no common sense. What’s funny is, the more I ask God for patience, the more he sends me difficult people so I could practice being patient. I guess I’m getting exactly what I ask for!!

  323. i can say that my ex bf is the most difficult person in my entire life. we have a daughter almost one year old but he left us. i just keep on praying to God na sana he (my ex bf) will have a change of heart. Its just so hard to accept everything but then im letting God to take over with my life

  324. hi,bro.bo,m going to join d kerygma feast here in davao dis coming may 29,2008 @ st.paul parish,matina.i was able to join such fellowship concert wayback 1996 @ addu covered court with my former superiors. anyways, m rili enlightened by your article ds week, m now teaching in the public skul and i tell u, there are a lot of my co-tchrs hu r rili pain in the neck, i wud rather keep myself locked insyd my classroom than going rounds and meeting these sweet looking creatures in the outsyd but dangerous once uv got to mingle with them,but thank god, i was able to cope up and deal with them bcoz they r already part of my daily tasks, there are few of them who are really good at heart, and i repeat,few of them. hehe,SO WAT R D GIFTS THESE DIFFICULT PEOPLE HAVE N STORE FOR US ? i think the very 1st thing they give us - r tolerance in dealing w/them,its not dat easy,2nd s the level of r understanding,we r given the chance to understand why they are that difficult to be w/,getting to study their personalities and teaching us to live with the way they are used to be, 3rd s they’re leading us to realize that we are better persons than them bcoz we understand them,we r d 1s hu understand,tolerate & dealing their being difficult,i dont want to know that some1 s having a difficult life bcoz of my being difficult, nkk-guilty,kawawa yung tao. & lastly, PATIENCE S A VIRTUE—wen we practice patience to some difficult people,we practice that virtue. i hope i cud get some correct points,anyway,thanks for this nice article,god bless us all!

  325. Hi!

    Yes, I have difficult person in my life! But it made me realized that I have to understand to be understood. It teaches me patience and loving.

    More power!

  326. In our lifetime, we will always meet one or two who it seems are difficult people to us. However, maybe it is the opposite, we may be the ones difficult to them. Anyway, as I got older (hopefully wiser), I realized that things may not be what they seem. Generally, people are really good but sometimes because of some past pains or bad experience they had or maybe having, they become what we conceive to be difficult or indifferent or whatever we may wish to call them. So, I think before being too emotional or judgmental on them, we should just understand them, put things in perspective, try to view the world from their point of view. I am sure that in time, harmony will reign. If all things humanely possible fall short, then I think the best thing to do is just pray for the person and hope that things get better for them and for us. That’s all. Take care Bro. Bo and I Look forward to many more inspiring thoughts from you. God Bless.

  327. I have always believed that we are here for a reason,be it that to be the “thorn in someone else’s rose” or be the good and beautiful butterfly in the garden. But whatever we may be, our main purpose in life is to reach out and help others in any way we can. Not that I am an angel, ( heck! I do have my shares of sins that nailed my Beloved to the cross) but in our own little way and in some that we are not aware of, we do help each other out. Galit ka sa kanya pero dahil sa kanya you tend to talk to God and in a way napagdadasal mo sya.. (kung sobrang bad nya,aber! and daming nagdadasal sa Dyos para sa kanya.. =) ) So baka nandyan sya para mas maging personal yung relationship mo kay Lord (yun blessing yun at gift sa ‘yo yun nung mean person). Also nandyan sila to let you see the other side of things, baka naman kasi may pagkukukang din tayo at tayo naman yung “thorn” sa buhay nya… Gifts…? hmmm..
    1.) We learn to have Patience - So that you won’t succumb to the saying..”If looks could kill…” =)
    2.) We learn to Observe and understand (with open eyes and heart) - Baka naman kasi isa tayo sa dahilan kung bakit ganun sya..
    3.) We learn to talk to God as a father, a friend - yung kaya mong i-open at alam mong hindi ka nya tatalikuran after learning your evil intentions..hehehe..

    Sharing of thoughts po! God bless.. =)

  328. I admit, am a difficult person to my my loveone. I always feel depressed, i am always negative, I forgot to trust at times and I always bring out the worst in him. sad to say. I am not like this during the past years. This started to happen after our anniversary. I really don’t know why but i admit that i am one heck of a difficult person to him. I’m guilty and I really thank God for giving me a loveone with a very huge patience. Lucky me! I’m so blessed for having him. I want to change my attitude for him because I know he really suffers when I am being difficult most of the time.

  329. brother bo i need help on this

  330. I’m also at times one of the difficult person to handle but most of the time I’m at the opposite side of the coin. I admire on your statement and believed that there are really people who are perfectly been molded into being negative and pessimistic person.

    Thanks for the always inspiring message..God bless!

  331. I’m also at times one of the difficult person to handle but most of the time I’m at the opposite side of the coin. I admire on your statement and believed that there are really people who are perfectly been molded into being negative and pessimistic person.

    Thanks!

  332. Bro. Bo, i was supposed to email you the day before we attended a Retreat. It has something to do with a person who give so much difficulty in my life, why? Because I’ve learned to love this person in a wrong way….but after that 3-day retreat, the more it become difficult, because I am obeying God’s will. And slowly, with God’s help, things become easier. Thanks to the Lord, He opened my heart.

    Allow me share with you the letter I am suppose to email you before the Retreat…. Thanks.

  333. There are times, we are having difficulty dealing other person not becuase they are “difficult person”, but because both of you are engaged in difficult situation, like having extra marital affairs, and the problem lies when you decided to make things right for both of you. Situation like this really needs God intervention… All we have to do is to ask God’s help. I did. And with God’s grace and mercy, things become easier.

  334. There are times, we are having difficulty dealing with other person not becuase they are “difficult person”, but because both of you are engaged in difficult situation, and the problem lies when you decided to make things right for both of you. Situation like this really needs God intervention… All we have to do is to ask God’s help. I did. And with God’s grace and mercy, things become easier.

  335. What would you do if you forgive the people who committed a crime against you, the very people who tried to destroy you and yet they were still too proud that instead of accepting the hand of peace they would still say something bad to you?

    What would you do if you keep on showing unconditional love and understanding to one person and yet would continue to hurt you by hurtful words and actions? This person nearly caused my dad’s life, made me look stupid in public through his lies and in spite all the goodness and support i gave him, would accuse me of doing things I i didnt do, say the most painful words one can imagine? It came to the point I’m afraid to commit the slightest mistake for I know I will get it from him?

    Sometimes I ask myself where is justice in this world? Is the Lord seeing all of these? What is he doing?

    Then I realized if my faith is strong enough God will have a way of making things right. A lot of times we look for justice in the form of revenge. Nothing beats the feeling of seeing the people who made us suffer, experience the same pains they have caused us. But being a just and loving God, a lot of times he makes things right by giving us blessings instead.

    Now I always tell myself, if people slam shut the door in your face, God will open a lot of windows for you to see the sunshine and rainbows. I’ve realized how blessed I am, how loving my family is, how good my company is.

    As for those who committed such a crime, I’ve let go knowing they will have their day with the Lord. As to the person who continuously hurt me emotionally, through the Lord’s help and time, i will be able to say goodbye.

    Thanks

  336. hi bro. bo,
    anong masasabi mo sa in -law na kahit anong gagawin ko , masama pa rin ako. pakiramdam ko mainit dugo niya sa akin. siguro hindi rin niya maiwasan na ganyan ang feelings niya sa akin. sometimes, she would verbalized the ” negative ” side ko and which is masakit. pinatawad ko na siya, matagal na, at handang handa ang puso ko tumanggap nang mga ” negative ” remarks in the future! smile and the whole world will smile at you!

  337. In times like these… GOD is testing our PATIENCE… He gives us these persns in our lives to test how deep our faith and patience. It’s like trials in our life. He is teaching us also to LOVE OUR ENEMIES, TO LOVE THE UNLOVABLE… I had a lot of experiences with these people. In my work, in my community and even in our ministry… tsk.. tsk.. they are everywhere but GOD is telling us that they need us, they need to be touched, to be understand because sometimes WE became like THEM…

    God Bless Us All and more power to your service Bro Bo!

  338. no man is an island. walang sinuman ang nabubuhay at namamatay para sa sarili lamang. there certainly are plenty of good persons in this world anyway although there are seldom difficult persons in our lives. we must focus more on the nice ones and make the criticisms of the difficult persons our inspiration in improving ourselves more. the nice persons always outnumber the difficult persons at hindi dapat masira ang mood natin because of those few difficult persons. i have two difficult persons in my workplace and i have learned to manage my interactions with them without the feeling of being stressed. i just bear in mind that i am there to work…

  339. hi bro. bo,
    sa ngayon bro. bo ang pinaka difficult na tao sa buhay ko ay yung sarili ko mismo.
    Bakit ba hanggang ngayon hindi ko matanggap tanggap na wala na ang mga parents ko. My mom died when I was 28 yrs old, she died in cancer. Two years after my dad followed her, he died in liver cancer. Hanggang ngayon lagi kung nakikita yung struggle nila para mabuhay lang, yung pakikipaglaban nila sa sakit at yung paghihirap nila. Nasaksihan ko kasi hanggang pagpikit ng kanilang mga mata, nasa tabi lang ako lagi hangganga bumitiw sila. Galit ako sa sarili ko dahil hanggang ngayon 33 yrs old nako hindi ko parin maburabura ang pakiramdam ko sa araw na yun,ang sakit sakit parin. Eveytime yung mga bagong friends ko mag tanong tungkol sa parents ko hindi ko mapigilang maluha. Bigla kasing sisikip and dibdib ko. Minsan sasabihin ko nalang wag munang itanong. Kasi hirap din akong mag explain.

  340. i had this boss before, i felt she really didn’t like me. and everyday with her was a BIG CHALLENGE…..as if everyday was examination or recitation…. but she was kinda religious, so every morning when she’s not around, i talked to her sto. nino inside her room…saying “sabihin mo naman sa kanya to be nice to me”…. as in everyday i pray for us to be friends…and with patience and grace from our lord, we became close after a year. I even remember crying so hard at her when i left the company. now, i always do this everyday prayer or sumbong to god if i have bosses who are not so lovable….and just get amazed by their transformation….

  341. difficult people are always there for us to lengthen even more our patience, be more understanding be more aware of our actions and be more loving.

    its our gain, not theirs..

  342. i had this “friend” years back…i wanted him to die asap..but then i realized that maybe…sumday…sumhow…God will do sumthing to punish him for all the wrong things that he did to me…he is a burden until now..although he is no longer “visiting” me, he’s just always on my memory that haunts me every now and then..

    at the end of the day, there is nuthing left for me but to try to move on with my life..without him..afterol…there is hope..and im sure God will give me a new start :)

  343. hi .. i was reading your post and at the same time thinking of the people who annoy and irritate me a lot.. got a lot of hateful people in my life but thanks to God, He have given me high level of patience to get along with them (though not that well).. but i must admit too that uncontrollably, i also lose my patience and there i start to backbite, curse and say anything bad against them, i know that’s not good but can’t really help it if its already too much! anyway, i always start and end my day reminding myself about the existence of God and the beauty of life and when everything seems to sink in my mind again with the enlightenment of the Holy Spirit (i believe), hatred and anger that started to grow in me caused by those hateful people will slowly be forgotten.. i pray a lot and when im down, angry or near temptations to do bad, i sing songs of praises, inspirational songs and the like just to remind me that God is looking at me and that He is with me.. i also learn to pray for the people who needs enlightenment, strength and were totally lost! i believe prayers have the power to move them and they need our prayers..

  344. yes, i also have this very difficult person in my life right now. i don’t know what happened to him. we used to be happy. i thought he love me. he told me so, several times actually.
    but he left me when i got pregnant. i was so devastated..i just wanna die that instance.
    but God is good, he made me realize that there are so many reasons why i have to continue living…my baby whose the pride of mylife now, my family for their unconditional love and my friend for being so supportive.
    i still have my depression attacks once in a while, and during those episodes…i just Pray..

  345. i don’t consider her a difficult person (my crush). she no longer answers my SMS when i told her i got feelings for her. wait, she replied to me (via text) that i am just a little, younger, wondeful brother in Christ. coz she’s our ate in SFC. maybe it’s just her way na busted ako…

  346. one way or another we all have difficult persons in our lives.. and the irony of it all, they are some times, the one whom we love most… and if that is the case, it is hard to just leave them behind.. how i wish!… i just pray and still am praying, ” God please touch his heart! Grant him the grace to realize his shortcomings”… bec till death do us part!.. hmmmn….., i wonder who could this be?….

    and yes, i wont give up on this difficult person bec he is God’s gift to me…… So help me GOD!….

  347. it’s a very interesting blog! :)

    The persons that give me difficult times are boss, they don’t pay us fairly… but then i’m still here Hoping and praying that someday God will lead them the right attitutede how to take care and pay their employees.

    My aunt, who’s become mean that even her own sister (my mom) treated as another person and she acts as she’s a witch.. Can’t blame her because she had a lot of pain in her life or during her time or young days.. So i asked God to help her forgive those people who done her wrong and bad..

    Some of my neighbor who outcast my family… What i learned from my parents “that don’t do unto to others that you don’t want do to you..” we just don’t mind them

    The last and not the least, my boyfriend. we’ve been in this relationship for a very long time.. I love him, but he nagged so much than i am. And a lot more to complain… don’t know what to do with him, if i should stay or leave him.. Still praying and praying and praying and praying that he will change for good.

    God is Good and God Bless! :-)

  348. Hay! my officemate have the ability to annoy me every single day! I always pray and pray and pray God will give me more patience. Nakakainis kasi di na nga sya pinapansin pero nagagalit pa rin and lagi nya sinasabi sa iba na PATAY na ako. nakakalungkot noh? kinalimutan na ang lahat.Sana maging ok na kami hindi man sa ngayon malamang sa darating na panahon. hehehehe God knows!

  349. A very close relaltive who i feel can not see anything nice, good in people, now that’s really harsh, but really seldom she does this especially if you are just a simple human being and with simple accomplishments, but if you are a bigshot as in intelligent rich and successful of course she likes you through and through, but only if you are nice to her or you are acceptable in her circle of friends, if you are not you are rotten too in her eyes. She thinks she is the best in mostly everything. What makes me sad is she actually is, but what is killing me is she is so aware of it and flaunts it everytime if she gets even the slightest chance. She tell people all her achievements even to those who are not really asking and more, and because she feels she is so big she thinks so little of everybody else. She is also not lacking in unkind words to describe people even those who are her friends, Of course they don’t know she’s doing it or else they are no longer her friends. It is very easy for her to hurt anyone’s feelings with her language and choice of words and even if she has been made aware of it, she really is not sorry. But don’t get me wrong she is very generous when she wants to, but don’t be fooled she does not give anything away without making sure there will be something that she would get back in return, It doesn’t matter whether you give whatever she has given you and more, she would still feel you owe her and would use this to get back at you forever, and I mean until your last breathe and she has the ability to make sure everyone else in the community knows about it too. She can not keep a secret, no way she would tell even if she promises not to. And if she is in a compromising situation, she would save herself and give you away easily without a blink of an eye.

    The sad part is I just live 2 houses away from her, and she has helped me a lot in my life, I could not possibly repay her for the things she has given me. First because we are in a totally different level financially, second, there are so many things she has done to me when i was still very young. Had I known that she will brag about it till very end I would not have accepted it. I also used to love her so much, but because of the pain she’s been inflicting on me and I don’t even have wounds, for if there was that could have been healed by now, I am not sure how much love for her is left.

    I have prayed so many times and so hard not to make her change but to make me accept her and no longer feel the pain, but I am always failing!!!!!!!

    atiragram

  350. Hello Brother Bo Sanchez,

    I am so very happy that I had already registered your website address and I was very amazed with your first email to me entitled”Difficult Person in Your Life” Yes, brother Bo,this really suites me, I have a very very difficult person in my life and this is my boyfriend,we are going 8 years this May 23, but until now he has no work, he is very dependent to his mother, he loves his vices and barkadas over me. In short he is an irresponsible person, he has lots of vices,drugs,smoking and drinking-he is really a great burden to me. I wanted to quit our relationship but I really love him and I couldn’t take that my 8 years relationship doesn’t work I mean sayang yong investment of times and moments that we had shared, but I don’t want to live in chaos marriage life.Please help me brother Bo, even before I keep on telling him to go with your feast Kerygma but he really doesn’t like,just once he had attended because we separated and he begged me to renew our relationship and that day was your Kerygma Feast here in Mabolo Cebu,and I told him that I would attend your feast and thats the reason why he once accompanied me,but the next feast of yours he doesn’t want to go with me because we are okay already.Please help me brother Bo on what to do.Thanks.Take much care because we really care for you.God Bless you always and to your family and to your Kerygma Family.

  351. The most difficult person in my life is ME. I already know my bad parts: I get angry easily, I say things I will regret… yet I do it. It’s hard to change sometimes esp. when people put you up against the wall… and since I’m a TOUGH WOMAN, I fight back most if not all the time. Luckily, I am aware of it and I think God is helping me change little by little everyday. I’m happy with the progress but it is still slow. “Why am I so difficult God?!”, I know when I was little I used to pray: “God I ask not for an easy life but to make me a strong person.” …I didn’t know you’ll make me super strong! I can also see how God loves me so, He never gives up on me and He gives me a healthy supply of loving people all the time and opportunities to appologize and start again.

  352. Peace to all; God gaves us certain difficult person , because He let us see who we are really. In fact , we are the difficult person who uses other to justified thier wrong doing, but the fact is we are the difficult person. We must pray for our self first then we take care for others.
    I have known since I become one of the follower of YAHWEH;, the difficult person around us is the opposite of our bieng. So before looking for others mistake , we must look for our own deeds.
    God bless and be good in the eyes of YAHWEH.

  353. Yes,there’s a lot of difficult people around me almost everyday of my life!!!…my officemates. I don’t like the way they treat me…lagi sila nakasimangot at di tumitingin sakin, tumingin man pero they would snob and sometimes smile pero “ngiting aso” i always ask myself,”what did i do?!” I admit that we had an issue before, my former friend (now she’s one of them=/ says that some of my officemates are intimidated and jealous of me because of the incentives i receive every month…aside from higher salary and transpo allowance, i’m also receiving housing allowance,….she said that they would talking behind my back and say things that i wouldn’t be so happy to hear…so my initial reaction is “WHY???” and then i laugh” but as time pass by,,,i became so disappointed and sad=( because eversince na nakasama ko sila i treat them nicely and naging super kind ako sakanila,although hindi kami close… But, that’s not enough reason for them to treat me like this…minsan naaapektuhan na trabaho ko!?…before ako ang personal secretary ng boss namin,now nagpalapad na ng papel yung dalawa including my former friend just to get more attention from my boss…so now they mess up with me…feeling ko may something sila ginawa kaya nahati yung trabaho ko sakanila, that happened after i took a one month maternity leave …and after my 4days sick leave…
    Everyday i pray to the Lord na sana HE would touch their hearts so that magbago pagtingin nila sakin…
    Ngayon nawalan narin ako ng gana na pansinin talaga sila, as in DEADMA korin sila!!!
    I’m thankful nalang that my bf is here working with the same company, he would always say “Hayaan mo na sila, wag mo sila pansinin! masaya sila sa ginagawa nila at wala kanaman ginagawang masama sakanila db?so wag ka papaapekto,gawin molang trabaho mo”….. Sometimes i want to quit my job because of those difficult people that i deal with everyday,,,ayoko nasila makita, lalo na yung former friend ko na pinasok ko sa company na ito pero nangunguna pa sya ngayon sa pagtrato sakin ng ganito… Sometimes,naiiyak nalang ako sa desk ko because when i see them laughing and forming into groups,, sobrang nasasaktan ako, they are not talking to me anymore,,,sobrang laki ng pinagbago nila since nung pinaguusapan na nila ako behind my back…. I’m so disappointed with my former friend=( dinala ko sya dito sa company na ito, and i expect her to show respect to me…pero ganito ginagawa nya sakin… Now,i don’t know kung saan patutungo ito, we’re in an office na maliit lang,lima lang kami na Filipino sa loob ng office and the rest puro expats,pero apat sila against me=(
    Pls. bro Bo help me to pray with these people around me,,everyday i’m really bothered at sobrang apektado ako dahil ayoko ng ganitong mga tao sa paligid ko…
    Lord, help me to be strong and help me fight these feeling of disappointment and anger…
    Praise God!!! tnx.

  354. Bro. Bo,

    A good article I read, this early morning.

    What are you complaining about?

    Unless we live as a recluse, daily we have to put up with people who behave stupidly or do something hurtful and sinful. Today’s first reading tells us: “Do not complain about one another, that you may not be judged.” Is there ever a day when we don’t grumble about somebody? Even recluses find plenty to complain about! Maybe we should spend a month in a monastery taking a vow of silence, just to get into the habit of not complaining.

    When I pay attention to what I say about others, I start grumbling against myself, because I’m not a prophet who’s “an example of hardship and patience” like James mentions. But complaining against myself is the same sin as grumbling against others!

    In begging God to teach me how to guard my mouth, I have learned that if we must complain, we should tell our complaints to him and only to him. Holy living means compassionately loving people even when we have reason to complain. When we’re too weak for that, God prefers that we say to him whatever we’d like to say to others, as in: “Grrrrr, God! Did you see what that Big Jerk just did? He nearly hit me with his truck!” And because our words melt into the silent love of God’s presence, instead of swearing at the guy or giving him a nasty gesture, we pray for his protection.

    The reason we like to complain is because we’re looking for help. We’re wishing (often unconsciously) that the person we complain to will step in and do something about it. Well, when we take our complaints to God, a most amazing response occurs. God gives us sympathy. He cares! He helps us by taking away our frustration, dissolving it into his love. Our blood pressure goes down. We even lose interest in continuing the complaints.

    If you enjoy complaining so much that you still seek out another person’s ear, here’s what you can do; it’s worked for me. Set up a little shrine in your home or choose a place at work that you can label your “sacred space”. At a time when there was a Big Jerk constantly troubling my life, I placed a small statue of Jesus the Good Shepherd in my bathroom. When I felt overwhelmed by an urge to complain, I excused myself to go to the bathroom (who’s going to stop me? hehehe). I knelt on the hard floor in front of the sink, looked at the image of Jesus, and prayed for God to bless the person who irritated me.

    How can we complain while we’re in sacred space on our knees? How can we complain while we use our mouths to pray?

  355. Dear Bro. Bo,

    It’s difficult pala if the difficult person in your life is your husband! But after a long week of torturing my self I learn to accept that even though God gave him to me. I still love him and willing to understand and help him change. All i need to do is be patient and persevering. I t is difficult if you grow up in a very different culture. the way to love a person is to pattern the unconditional love of God for us.

    Your web really help me a lot. thanks God and to you bro. bo.

  356. hello bo, I’ve been in ISRAEL for 3 yrs now, and yes i had a very difficult person in my life at iyon ay ang husband ko. bago ako umalis napakarami ko ng problema sa kanya coz his into drugs, gambling, and his very alchoholic man, wala na natira sa kabuhayan namin, matagal na ako nag susuffer sa kanya almost 9 years, ang ang huling naging desisyon ko ay ang lumayo, sa kabila ng maiiwan ko ang aking 3 anak. Nang unang taon ko d2 sya ang nag-aasikaso sa mga bata pero di nag tagal dinala nya mga anak ko sa parents ko but it’s ok mas favor un sa isa kagaya ko, on my 2nd yrs here i heared that he has a girl, i was angry to him but still i love him, i don’t know what to do BO coz my family is very angry to him….. almost a year na rin na wala kami contact kasi diko na alam no. nya at magkaganun pa man di ko rin alam kung ano gagawin ko. plz pray for me na sana makagawa ako ng tamang desisyon para sa amin thanks to you too at everydAY ay may nababasa ako na nakapagPAPALUWAG NG DAMDAMIN ko…. my god bless u more…..!!!!!!

  357. yes,I have one thou I may say she not really “my friend,”but God always finds ways that I will be with her,I feel she very annoying,then I ask myself “why she.it came into my mind that God want me to pray for her.

  358. Gary, thank you for that great advice!

  359. i have my store manager & my group manager as someone who makes my work tiring & sometimes makes me quit my job early cause i feel they make me feel sick… i don’t know how this happened, but long before, I used to enjoy my work ( a lot) but since my other two co-managers left for Canada,(they were my close friends by the way) I started feeling that i lost my “kakampi” and what was left are two monsters…. hehehe. it’s funny that before i used to work with these person ( I function very well) but when i started announcing my resignation, i felt that our relationship has changed… feeling ko it’s because i’m about to live and sooner wala na silang “makukuha” from meeh, wala na akong kwenta for them. (note: I’m still employed with the company)… hello! I’m not yet leaving… this makes me think tuloy that i should leave the company earlier… I find them very difficult to deal with… grabe… On the other way, they test my self… How far can i tolerate that things they do to me… I pray to GOD, bless them and forgive them for MAYBE they don’t realize what they’re doing…

  360. difficult people and my special gifts:

    because of them i learn to be patient in all terms, to prayer hard specially if i will spend time with them which is unavoidable, to be more understand why they are like that and what went wrong and why they became like that. learn to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference (i always say this on top of my head if im with the DIFFICULT PERSON)..

  361. i just came from a teambuilding activity with our office department. i was a host of the 1st activity which was entitled “how well do you know each one in the dept.” you have to write all the names of the members and write word/words that first come to mind about her… and i got different names but one that struck me the most was…. “backbitter across the board!”

    it was a friend who said it.. and i really got offended… i was upset even. but after a while i asked myself why he had said this… i know in my heart i wasn’t this person he said i was….

    but maybe i am a difficult person at times. i can be what he said i was, but i was probably too proud to admit. realizing this, i pray that i may not be a difficult person anymore than what a friend already said i was…. may God continue to shed light on a person as proud as i am….

  362. yes… their is this one person i have difficulty dealings with… she is our accountant, she is so self centered that she doesnt what to help in making things easier… and she had this annoying attitude of “padabog n ilalagay ang files infront of you” after finishing checking it… and while talking to her “nakismangot niyang mukha ang nakalantad sayo” i’m trying all my will not to burst my temper on her… kc that wont make things good for us.. at ayoko ng may kaaway sa office as much as possible… so i’m being polite nalang.. and tinatak ko nalang sa isip ko iyong katagang ” be king to rude people because they need it the most”
    Goodbless to all.. and never get tired doing good for others… tnx…

  363. […] Okay, that’s not true. Blog comments on the web don’t get wet. But I imagined that if they were written on paper, they’d look like used tissue paper after my wife watches a Bea Alonzo-John Lloyd telenovela. (You can read the flood of comments in my previous post, Do You Have A Difficult Person In Your Life?) […]

  364. God is really answering my prayer. . because everytime i complain about my mother ipinagdarasal ko na lang na “Lord, ikaw na ang bahalang magbago sa kanya..” and “Lord, ikaw na ang bahalang magbago sa akin..”

    High school palang ako magka away na kami ng mother ko dahil sa maaga kong pag bo boyfriend..dahil don hindi ako naging close sa kanya..natuto akong magsinungaling..hanggang sa nasasagot ko sya.. madalas akong wala sa bahay..hanggang during college graduation ko hindi siya umattend..nung nag work na ako..mejo nabawasan ang alitan namin (siguro dahil kumikita na ako) sabi nya kasi ayaw nya akong mag asawa agad ng maaga dahil sa gusto nyang makapag trabaho pa ako ng maganda..kaya lang nabuntis ako..so nagalit na naman sya..pero nung na ikasal na ako at makapag abroad..naging maayos ang relasyon namin..lagi kami nag uusap sa telepono, lahat ng nangyayari sa buhay ko nasasabi ko na sa kanya..sabi ko nga..masarap palang maging bestfriend ang mother ko…namimiss ko sya pag nalulungkot ako..dumating yung panahon na tapos na ang trabaho ko sa abroad at kailangan ko nang bumalik sa pilipinas, doon kami ng pamilya ko tumira sa bahay ng parents ko..kasi nga alam kong mas at home ako don dahil sa kasama ko ang mga parents ko, kaya lang pagkatapos ng isang taon naming pagsasama ng mother ko..eto na naman.magka away na naman kami..hindi na kami nagkikibuan….palagi kaming nagpapakiramdaman sa isat-isa..ang pakiramdam ko at compalin ko ay parang aasikasuhin lang ako ng mother ko kung may trabaho ako. dahil nung nagigipit na ako financially, hindi nya na ginagawa sa amin yung mga dating ginawa nya nung una naming pagdating tulad ng pagluluto, pag aasikaso atbp..active ang mother ko sa prayer meetings at sa simbahan. pero ang tanong ko palagi at lagi kong hinahanp sa kanya ay ang pag ka nanay nya sa loob ng bahay..hindi ko maramdaman yon..

    sabi ko nga sa asawa ko, siguro tinuturuan tayo ni Lord paanong makisama sa ibat ibang klaseng tao. dahil ngayon na may itatayo na kaming business, makaka salamuha namin ay ibat ibang klase ng tao.. ang pagiging pasenshoso sa lahat ng bagay at kung paano umintindi..dahil hindi ko naman mababago ang mother ko, ang mababago ko lang ay sarili ko kaya nga ang dasal ko rin baka naman ako ang difficult? siguro mataas ang expectations ko sa tao…

  365. why my family?
    most of my sisters are mistresses, and my only bro. had an affair to a women who also had a family..and most of them
    are depending to my mom.my father had also another woman
    in his life.i am the only one who do not have a child.
    i am really scared “what if i will be like them?”
    we are 9 siblings and most are depending to my mom
    especially in terms of education for their children because
    most of my sisters are separated. that scares me a lot. maybe i will be like them..i hope not..but still i love them…
    although sometimes me and my sister had a gap
    because of what they are doing and i am concern to their children. they had seen on what are my sister doing..
    instead of taking care of their children, they are
    fun w/ their friends and their relationship w/ others..
    and my mom is tired of telling them their responsibility
    because they are old enough yet they do it again and again.
    some of my niece and nephews are not staying w/ my sister. some is in laws, some are in friends,one is in my ate
    the other 2 is in my father.
    apparently, we have lack of communication at home.
    that often times it lead to a gap to any one
    of us….i almost blame my siblings
    of whats going on and any problems coming to us, because of them….
    i pitied for their children..

    here is my boyfriend at first year in our relationship
    he quit his vices(smoking and marijuana) which is i hate.
    but after a year and half maybe if i have not ask him he will not tell me, he is committed again in his vices. thanks that
    he is true to me but no thanks because he loves still his vices..he is in central luzon while i am here in bicol..
    i pray to God that i hope he will change..
    but i remember my bf’s told me “ganito mo na ako nakilala”
    is that mean forever na yung bisyo nya?

    >5 years ago.. there’s a stranger
    who text me worst words i have encountered
    in my life…..
    it ruins my everyday life.i just replied
    GOD BLESS YOU….
    i suspected a lady
    whom is a bit anger to me just because the man he loves
    admired me..but i am wrong, the one
    who text me is one of my friend.i don’t know if its right
    i forgive her but i never forget what she had done to me..

    my father has an ailment now.
    i have not visited him this year.
    he is in their house w/ his mistress and my niece and nephew.. we have just news about him.
    he had many vices before such as
    gambling, smoking, and drinking everyday/night
    w/ his friends..
    he had his money in his pocket weekly
    through his job. he bought everything for his
    friends especially when they are drinking. he just gave
    us a little amount for our expenses. he spend more time
    w/ his friends but now they are all gone.. after his job
    and got ill few friends or such true friends are their..
    sometimes i told myself
    “siguro sinisingil na sya ng Diyos sa ginawa nya
    sa amin at kay mama..”
    pero father ko pa rin sya. naawa pa rin ako sa kanya
    ngayon.. i just pray.

  366. I just want to know the degree at which we could still tolerate the difficult person in our life. If the difficult person happens to be say: your husband.
    Three years aga before I said “I do” I was in the pink of health after three years here I am, perfectly miserable, bitter and heart broken literally and figuratively. Is habitual drunkenness, constant verbal, psychological abuse, occasional physical beating and perpetual loss of job still considered under the category “difficult?” It’s true Bro. Bo many a times I asked GOD to either take him or me to end my misery, because he’s family is influential , We are constantly in fear. But I know GOD will serve justice to all his misgivings

  367. my boss!

    requires me to tell him first whenever i go out of the office after 5pm.

    maybe he thinks that the sign of respect on his part, but does he need to know my whereabouts after 5pm?

    does he?

    i work 8-5pm. i want the rest of the day to be mine. in fact, i no longer want to be any boss. i want to be my own boss. i want to handle my time..and earn at the same time.

    so if he still wants to know where i’d be going after 5pm, i’d rather resign.

  368. hi bro bo,
    read other comments and it seems everybody encounter difficult people in their lives. Meaning hindi tayo normal if we dont encountered them. Well, got 1 also, but able to overcome. before i thought my prayers are not answered, i keep on praying “lord, sana magbago na sya”…matagal bago nangyari ang hinihingi ko…umabot pa kmi sa punto na nagpang-abot kmi…but we are able to overcome it, nagkapatawaran and okey na. I can say, subra akong pasensyoso pero tao lng me pra hindi bumigay devah. anyway, right now, our relationship is okey, what i have to do na lang is to retain my patience, kung kayang habaan gawin ko nalang. I know God understands me on all my doings…i thanked him for all the blessings.

    thanks and God bless po!

  369. my mom, my dad, my brother, my aunt, my family..it’s really difficult..like i cannot be myself..but i want to be free..be happy..face my own problems…and be a loving child/person..be understood..be safe..

  370. Am i too late here? Anyway, the most difficult person to deal with right now is myself. I don’t know, maybe I still don’t know myself that much. Know in the sense of what I want in life, what gender preference I’d be in. I’m on my mid-20’s and yes, I’m still confused. Knowing the fact that being “gay” in my family is a big no-no, I’m struggling everyday when I’m dealing with my parents, my siblings, our neighbors..

    Bro. Bo, is being “gay” a sin? Maybe that’s one of the reasons why up to now, I still don’t know what I am. I fear the Lord if tell Him I’m more to be “gay” than straight, He’d abandon me.

    The people who left comments here are inspiring. God wanted me to read all of these comments to give me strength. Thanks Bro. Bo for having this website. God bless everyone.

  371. Hi banana,

    I think there is nothing wrong with being “gay”… as long as you are not doing any harm to others… God’s will is so great that he is giving us choices for us to be happy… there’s nothing wrong being a gay if your actions are indeed good and straight… i know it would really be hard for you (since i have gay friends dealing a synonymous situation like yours)… always remember that there is an appointed time for everything…. and that whatever you are encountering as of the moment, just bear this in mind, “this too shall pass…”

    May you always travel your path with peace and love… Be strong…
    God bless…

    :)

  372. gud morning banana
    being gay a SIN?, Its a big NO! my tito ambe is a gay but we respect him that much,he dress decently ,work with dignity,(he is a vendor at PNB escolta bringing small snacks)he supports his parents and sister together with her children who were abondoned by husband.He is now old and yet with the small earning he has he was able to build a house for his old age,was able to send his nephews to school until they were able to finish college.See? he is a gay but he was able to gain respect with the community and he told me the last time we saw that he is not sorry that he is a gay because he was able to withstand all the trials of being a gay and he knows that god is his companion in his journey.Ayos Ba? there are gay people in the community i heard ansel beloso share his struggle maybe you can model your life with his way of communing with god.
    Kaya mo yan God bless Love you

  373. hi banana,
    Ang hirap naman niyan, big No No ang gay sa family nyo. Ako nga gusto ko may kapatid na gay. Ang saya nga nilang kasama, nho.
    Hindi naman kasalanan ang pagiging gay, basta promise mo lang - in the end babae parin ang kasama mo sa buhay. Tama si camille malalampasan mo rin ang lahat. Bless you.

  374. yes there are difficult person’s that God created.. and they are here to show us how much blessed we are…

    i have recently had an encounter with a very difficult person.. she was a former textmate (daw) of my bf.. i had put a stop on their relationship.. since then our relationship (with my bf) has never been strong… recently.. she has texted me and say bad things to me and even cursed me… whew… that really hurts… and she’s even texting me now and still doing what she loves to do… masyado cya palengkera… i may not be a perfect person… but i’m not that bad either… i may have done some things that God will not approved of… but nobody has the right to cursed me or even say bad things to me… that’s when God entered and tell me in His most holy way that I am His child and even I’m not as obedient and good christian as He wanted me to be… He still loves me… and also tells me to just ignore her and leave everything to Him…

    I love you Lord… and my strenght is in You…

    Thank you Bo for this website…

    God Bless everyone…

  375. Hi lena, benneth and camille :)

    I never expected people will react to what I’ve shared here. Nakakataba ng puso ang mga sinabi nyo dito. :) honestly, I thought Bro. Bo would be the only one who would acknowledge on what I’ve commented here, but no, it was even BETTER because God sent me 3 wonderful “Bro. Bo-like” people (plus all the people who read my entry na rin hihi) who shed some light and hope on my struggles :)

    We must admit though, “gay issues” is still taboo in our society, diba? It’s easier to admit to other people that one is gay than admitting it to your own family. Ewan ko, ganun kase yung sa situation ko. I fear of rejection, especially from the people I love the most, my family and God. And with that, I always do what they expected a straight woman would do (yup, im one of the female species that is) just to avoid any confrontations and disappointments. Disappointed kaya si God sa akin dahil I know deep inside me I’m happier being gay?

    Sana dumating na po yung appointed time.. :) Nagpapasalamat ako kay Lord dahil pinapagaan nya ang loob ko dahil sa mga sinabi ni lena, benneth and camille.. :) God really moves in mysterious ways, eh? :) Take care everyone. God bless..

  376. bakit nga kaya, God created difficult people? pwede naman lahat good people diba?..
    my husband was (kung ‘ was’ na nga kaya) a womanizer, and the last nearly broke our family and my sanity. i dont know kung until now meron pa rin but at the moment, wala siyang work because the girl was an officemate.ako lahat nagpoprovide.Ang hirap pala.but the situation made me come to God, made me sensitive sa needs ng iba, humble, understanding and more loving.
    bo, thank you very much for inspiring me always, na kahit na its too hard to live a life na kasama sila still there’s hope. much love

  377. the reality is we are all difficult people… in one way or another. sa ating pagtingin maaaring ang ibang tao ang mahirap pakitunguhan ngunit sa kanilang paningin maaaring tayo naman ang napakahirap pakitunguhan. the perception depends on the values and beliefs of every person. kaya’t napakahalaga ng sapat na pang-unawa at pantay na pagtingin (sa abot ng ating makakaya) hinggil sa mga bagay-bagay na ating ikinagagalit. as a rule of thumb, let’s try to always include ourselves to the equation — marami kasing pagkakataon na ang pagkakamali lamang ng ibang tao ang ating tinitingnan at pinupuna pero ang hindi natin napapansin tayo man ay may kaukulang pagkukulang rin sa pag-unawa sa kanila. at ang simpleng pagpapahalaga sa pinagmumulan ng gawi ng isang “difficult person” ay maituturing na isang napakalaking hakbang upang ating maibigay ang angkop na reaksiyon para sa kanila.

  378. Hello Bro Bo,

    You’re absolutely right, “difficult people in our life” bring out the best in us… There is a saying that “you can easily forget the person who makes you laugh, than the person who makes you cry”. During the moment na sobra na tayong nasasaktan because of that person, we cried and it seems we wanted to give up without realizing that God gave that person to us para hindi natin sya malimutan. We must admit, sa oras na nasasaktan tayo at napapagod saka lang natin madalas naaalala that there is Someone standing beside us and always ready to help us.

  379. what should i do when somehow i feel that the difficult person in my life is part of my family?

    i am very sad right now and confused like i am mentally deranged.

    they cant understand my feelings and my actions. sometimes when i do things which i think could protect them from being hurt, hurt them.

    i do not know what to do.

  380. i think God created diffcult people on eart(including ourselves) to be a burden(Christian burden) to them, we can actually learn to them, and while we put patience to them, i believe that the difficult person can somehow pick something good from us :)

  381. hi mr.bo,
    i just want to share that i have a difficult person in my life,rather not only in my life.But in my family life. My mother’s boyfriend. When I live in my Manila for 8 months together with my mom boyfriend,his good w/us.But since I left in Manila and go back here in province,I heard some news what my mom bf doing to my siblings to my mother.. He shooting to my mom and they always have a quarrel together.Even my sister,he touch the vagina of my sister. And when I knew that,I was so mad and I really want to kill that person!I want to go back in Manila just to give punches and kick to my mom bf!and the worst is,my mom try to defend that guy to me! I always praying that someday that guy will die! Until know I cam forget that anf not forgive that person!!!

  382. siguro nga,, all of us are diffucult people in our own ways.. thank you for reminding me of that..

    lot of love and prayers.

  383. my husband is making a big mess! he is the most difficult person in my life right now. =(

  384. […] -Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life? […]

  385. yes, i have!

    my dad is a difficult person to have around! =(

  386. clients ca be difficult, they are your daily pains in the working world but i just think of my son who has his share of giving me daily pains…bottomline at the end of the day—they have given you something, my clients give me work, my son gives me the memories of parenthood, which i treasure more than my work.
    Thank God for differences, in reality they make us whole.

  387. We can’t deny the fact that each day we meet difficult people in our lives. Whoever they are and no matter how difficult they are, they will never bit good person. Through them we learned to see the beauty of life and we learned to know more about ourselves. Sometimes, we accomplished things because they challenge us. For me no matter how difficult they are for as long as you continue doing the right things they will never win! Let’s pray for them that they may find God in their life. My dear friends keep smiling and keep on making a difference…
    God Bless everyone…

  388. I have met many difficult people in my life, but I remember my 4th year high school teacher most because she has taught me valuable lessons:
    1.The best laid plans and best efforts sometimes don’t pay off due to many reasons but all allowed by Him. Mine went to waste because of her pettiness, but as that door closed windows of blessings opened.
    2. I am still me even without the medals around my neck, a complete person loved by God, my family, friends and myself.
    3. Forgiveness can be given even though the person did not ask for it.
    Other people have hurt me so much but I have learned that anger will only hurt me more. So I pray for them, treat them well and help them when I could (financially, spiritually and emotionally).

    Without these difficult people I don’t know if I’d still be me… So they’re really blessings, painful yes but still blessings…

  389. to loving sister,
    try to do what you want to do.give your sister a hug and tell her what you want to tell her.walang matgas na puso sa nagma malambot na puso.maybe she is waiting for you to do this.praying for you and your family.and dont be disappointed you tried hard and God knows what is in your heart.

  390. its true that difficult people are given to us by God for some purposes, but sometimes nakakapagod din, especially if they get in the way with every move you make. Well, acceptance is the key if you can’t get away with the situation anymore plus loads of prayers for strength, and i believe that God will make everything alright, He gave them to us after all. Thank you Bo for being there helping us deal with the idiosyncracies of life, your words never fail to inspire me.

  391. […] Okay, that’s not true. Blog comments on the web don’t get wet. But I imagined that if they were written on paper, they’d look like used tissue paper after my wife watches a Bea Alonzo-John Lloyd telenovela. (You can read the flood of comments in my previous post, Do You Have A Difficult Person In Your Life?) […]

  392. yes, i do have a difficult person in my life — my mother. I love her with all my heart but she keeps on controlling every aspect of my life. I am 25 years old now. And until now, she still have the final decision over anything, like what time should I be home, where and when I can go. I try my best to make her happy by doing everything she wants, but it leaves me tired and drained. I have never given her a reason to be this strict to me. I had good grades when I was in school. I have good friends. I come home right after classes and did everything she asked me to do. But now, I am all grown up. I want to make my own decisions. She needs to let me go. I reached my saturation point. How do you deal with this when your mom is the difficult person in you life????

  393. Dear Br. Bo,

    I believe that difficult person is our life is God’s instrument of making us/me patient and forgiving.

    My husband is one of the difficult person i have to deal with. I love him so much which he is very much aware of the reason for him to take me for granted. He is an OFW going in and out of our country. We are not blessed with children yet but i am sure God will give us babies in His time. Due to my husband’s “knight in shining armour “attitude, a lot of girls would mistake it differently and sometimes he would take advantage to this and courts these girls. It was unfortunate only for him because i would always catch him.

    But eventhough he would do this, I still forgive him and continue to love him telling myself that “because of my love for him, i will definitely believe what he would say. ” Even if i know he is lying. These hurts me so bad, pero mahal ko kasi eh. I am loving him blindly?

  394. Hi,Hello Good day! Sir/Ma’am

    I’m Niño, I’m deaf & (disabled person) I’ve less both of my hearing since my mother give birth to me. As told by my mother before, when she was pregnant she was sick she has a (Broncho Penumonia) took some medicines like antibiotic that cause severe therapeutic reaction w/c is overdose in antibiotic.

    I finish my Secondary course 1st to 4th year, Then I pursue my Colloge degree Taking up BEED course but later I quit schooling, because of financial problem. I try my best to look for a job. God grace I found a job as one of a(Kitchen crew in Don Henrico’s gourmet. I work there for 2 years experience in Don Henrico’s gourmet. Recently I resigned my work.

    I’m 24 years Male.
    I would like to apply and very much willing to work in dubai for helper kitchen. Please help me. Thank you so much and hope kind and consideration. Godbless you…

    My e.mail address: niotyn@yahoo.com.ph
    Cellphone:639196873368

  395. hi bro.Bo.!!
    ..at my young age,i have a difficult person in my life..hirap n hirap talaga akong pakisamahan ang tulad nya,dumating pa nga sa point na ako na yung dumidistance sa kanya..naiinis aq sa kanya kahit di ko naman alam kung ganon din sya sakin..hanggang sa nasanay na akong kasama sya,khit mraming times akong naiinis sa kanya dumating pa rin yung time na nagkakasundo na kami,na masaya nah ako with him,pero ang tagal din bago mangyari ito,.
    ..dahil sa isang kaibigan at dahil dito,nrealize ko na ung difficult person pla na yun is the one of my greatest blessings from God,sa ngayon,dahil sa difficult person na yun,may nagbago sakin..hindi nah ako nahihirapan pakisamahan ang mga tulad nya.
    ..ang bait talaga ni God noh,,
    ..3 times pa lang akong nkakaatend sa feast nyo pero dami ko ng natutunan,dami kong nrealize at lalo pa akong nging happy..
    ..thank you very much.
    ..GOdspeed.

  396. yes, i do have a difficult person in my life as of the moment. she’s the most abhorable person i have ever met and she is our Internal medicine residency training officer. she always makes us feel bad. she’s always armed with criticisms (as if she is the most perfect person in this world!), always compare us with them as trainees before as if now and then are comparable (they were considered toxic already during a 24hr tour of duty when they admit 5 patients, but now 20 patients is our ordinary duty), digs out over and over every wrong you have done in the past (even those that have been resolved already), tells her friends about your wrongdoings, and worse, we haven’t learned anything from her as expected of a training officer. she always wear this “toxic look” of meeting eyebrows. She doesn’t even offer a smile at us. Doesn’t she realize that she demoralize the residents with her approach?I dont’ know why she’s like that. I have a theory: maybe because she’s not happy with her life and she wants everybody to join her in her despair…i dont know. i can only guess… whatever her reason i can only pray for her so that she realizes her doings in the nearest future..i would also pray for us so that we will all be able to adjust towards her …

  397. […] Okay, that’s not true. Blog comments on the web don’t get wet. But I imagined that if they were written on paper, they’d look like used tissue paper after my wife watches a Bea Alonzo-John Lloyd telenovela. (You can read the flood of comments in my previous post, Do You Have A Difficult Person In Your Life?) […]

  398. i love to read all the comments and i wanted to share also what i am experiencing right now, i am also dealing difficult person right now and i don’t really get it! sometimes she is so good but most of the time i don’t understand and it is so irritating for me to response thru her actions and sometimes i even don’t know what to do!!!!!! i got pains in my heart and always run to my room and wanted to shout and ask Lord, why do i have to be with this person…. but then as time goes along everyday i can say that i know God puts me here in my place right now to keep in mind that i have to more patient and more humble just like him…. i know it is realy difficult to deal with your in-laws! i wanted to listen and accept comments and opinions how to deal with my in-laws!

  399. the most difficult person that im dealing right now is my husband’s mistress.. i am not a violent person so what i did was to send her mails begging to let my husband go. she knows that he is a married man but she just replied me.. GAGA KA! how painful that was. but im always praying that God will always give me this virtue of being patient. i know God will always be there for me . taking care of me and my son. God will never leave me and He is always there in my pains and hurts. My husband will soon realized his mistakes. Im in the most painful and depressing situation right now but with God and Mama Mary beside me everything will be alright. im still hoping to have a lasting marriage with my husband. This is just a trial in our marriage. To those who are able to read this…..PLEASE INCLUDE ME IN YOUR PRAYERS.

  400. The difficult person in my life right now is this married teacher with 3kids that i met here abroad. We just wanted to be friends and we talked always that it is not good to have a relationship outside marriage. Right now we are resisting these feelings of wanting to fill our loneliness of being away from our families. I know God bless me so much that temptation of commiting adultery wants to take it away. I pray that someday I can get my family here, and she also hoped to bring her family too. Please pray for us.

  401. i have a daughter who just turned 4 this october, and unlike her two other siblings, tcia is very difficult to handle. i know she is still young and that her ways will change when she gets older but the problem is i hate it when people start to notice how she behaves… one person, an officemate, would shamelessly point out to me how she would want to see my daughter get tripped as she runs, and that she would laugh if she would get hurt. how devilish of you, i would say, half jokingly, but my heart is enraged by such hurtful comments towards my child. i have no nanny to take care of my kid while i am away working so i hve no choice but to bring her with me at work. so what i did when these obviously mindless hurtful remarks wouldnt seem to end, i just taught my child to stay away from that person who obviously has developed an ire towards her, and that, i think, is really not normal for such person, a mother at that, with her degree of education and all. but just the other day, we had lunch with the same person ( we ate packed lunch in the office) in the same room and she culdnt help but nag my kid about her eating habits, for pete’s sake, she is a child! my ear started to ache as they tried to tell stop her from drinking soda w evrytime she sips from her cup. i asked my kid to behave while at the office infront of them but it seems that person want me to hurt my kid instead when she said “mabait ka pa nga diyan”. i just continued joking but telling her to back off . but she just continued so i just said please stop nagging my kid cuase she is after all my daughter, not yours. she just mockingly said, oh yeah, right.
    how insenstive can one person be? then i just realized she isnt normal, her gray matter is probably riddled with anomalies that is why she has no sense of sensing when one can get hurt by mere words and gestures. she is always this diffiuclt even with clients. she is probably the most rude person i ever met.
    and because of her, i cant help but be mean towards my child because i need her to behave when she is in public.
    and because of her, i feel bitter right now.
    i dont know why she has an abnormal personality, but i just hope i wouldt have to deal with her anymore…

  402. i have difficulty like mrs. maxy, i am not yet married but i found my boyfriend had an affair with a girl who has already a child. Thank God they admit their mistake and said sorry to me.. Now, they dont have any communication (i guess).. But the difficult is that i can’t forget and forgive them.. Everything is still in my mind.. i dont peace of mind because i still remember the pain.. i still feel the anger.. until now i dont know how to fix myself.. i wanted to forgive them and forget everything but i dont know how.. I always say that i will leave everything to GOD and he has a purpose why it happens.. Please help me pray..

  403. I have a business, small time lang…but the management it self are so difficult they opened bars inside the building that would compete with the tenants, when we tired to unite as one tenants…ngayon ginigipit nila kami…they need to help us grow but they are pulling us down…making our assets zero and worst negative…

    if we set up a meeting with them about the rent, they will close us down…kasi daw may utang pa kami…we admit we have our own share of debt sa rent kasi the place is not compensating…the rent is too expensive and we are not using it 24/7 isa pa…mga officers nila grabeh umasta…they will try to step down on our waiters keso waiters lang sila…hinde dapat ganun…dapat fair…

    sometimes it made me regret why i choose this establishment on which i would start my business…im just new to the business world and i need to be strong…kahit anong pag-gigipit nila sa amin…we remained strong…and we remained intact…thank god talaga kasi love pa rin kami ni lord…kasi at least kahit super gipit na kami meron pa rin kaming customers na nag a-appreciate sa amin…

    bakit kasi difficult ang mga taong to…dapat they should help us (the tenants) to be successful parang gusto nila i-brankrupt ang mga business namin…

    please pray for me…and for my business…
    and hopefully pray for them para ma enlighten sila…sa ginagawa nila…

  404. I was at the office when I decided to call my brother sa pinas, tapos ang nakausap ko yung sis-in-law ko & she told me something na hindi ko inaasahan…that my father is bringing his mistress sa bahay namin, sobrang galit na galit ako…talaga…akala ko kasi nagbago na siya after naming mag-usap several years ago & then eto na naman balik na naman sya sa dati…gulong-gulo ako na ang daming kong iniisip na masama lalo na for my dad na magkasakit para magising siya sa ginagawa nya…until i discussed it with my husband, sabi ng husband ko wag daw mag pray ng masama but pray na sana lukubin ang dad ko ni Lord para magbago…until now i’m still praying mag bago ang dad ko emotionally, psycholigically na isipin nya na matanda na sya para gumawa pa ng kalokohan…Sobrang masakit sa kalooban ko lahat ng nangyayari…please help me to pray for him na magbago at wag ng makiapid…please help me to pray for my family to be strong…apektado ako pati ang work ko…apektado ang buhay ko. thanks.

  405. […] -Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life? […]

  406. […] -Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life? […]

  407. i have this really difficult husband, like he always wants me to read his mind and not ask, no proper communication, and he really is difficult even before, now that things are messy my in-laws says “ganyan talaga yan kahit noon pa, kaya nga mahal ka ni mama, kasi naintindihan mo ang pasaway na anak niya talaga..” he is insensitive, and i don’t thinkhe is really irresponsible or so other people say. kasi , last september 2008 we have this difficulty of surviving everyday life, his salary is just enough for us to eat, and he for sure wanted things to buy. and he can’t live to leave his manok pang sabong (derby cock) or whatever they call it.. na magutom, so may budget din tlaga sa kain ang mga manok. like “mga manok” more 15+
    so he said, uwi muna kayo doon sa mama mo, mahirap ang buhay dito, problem sa trabaho iniipit ako, ayaw ko din magutom kayo, we are really struggling and i said i could work, look for a job, so we could save and build a little home. and because he’s pride is higher than the twin tower before, higher than mount everest.. he never wanted me to work, even if you can see he is struggling hard for us to survive.
    so i decided to go home, with our child and promised to visit us. but then , he visited twice only then wala na.. he never called, nor text. gossips say, he is with another woman, how would i know or should i believe, nahirapan n nga niya buhayin p kmi, hanap pa siya ng iba.
    ewan ko lang. i wont believe a thing untl nag kausap n kami.
    until now i kept on waiting
    as much as i never wanted to have a broken family.
    i prayed to God so hard “Lord please always guide him kahit pasaway siya, touch his heart na maisip niya kami na ng anak niya at sana dalawin niya kami”
    everyday i hoped to make things better., but when i text him, he always provoked me…which i always am..naku!!! nkakainis talaga, asar
    kung mag text ako, kumusta k na? sana mkadalaw ka dito,”
    magreply ba naman ng “hu u?stop texting.”
    huuhuhuhu
    over and over again my heart is broken into pieces
    and then i pray for God to heal the pain i always feel whenever i try to reach for him.
    sana magbago na siya, maisip na niya kami
    what’s meant to be, will be.
    kahit magdaan man ang maraming panahon, kung kami tlaga, kami talaga. pero gusto ko na habang lumalaki anak namin, we plant a seed of love in her, even if he does not love me anymore (or so) wala tlaga ako clue kung ano lugar sa kanya. napaka complicado n tao..
    please help me pray sana magkita na kami, magkausap man lang it’s been 4 long months na hindi niya kami dinalaw.
    i hope in time he will realize the value of family and how i value it, for him to see how i love him, despite of all the more negative attitude he has..than good ones

  408. I have and parent yun kaya mas mahirap.. she always works, too much! grr! Parents are You like this? I’m sure not..I’m sure not eveyone are like this..My parents, my mom, seem to neglect her responsibility as a mom..Other parents, I know how much You value You’re children..and I cannot tolerate what my mother is doing.. it’s hurting me and making me feel angry..workaholic kase na wala siyang time Sakin, Samin..yung insensitivity niya, so unfit, grr! evil! such immaturity! it’s her problem not mine but sometimes it’s affecting me..It affected me even before.. galit na galit talaga Ako sa ginagawa niya, hindi ba niya nakikita na hindi niya Ako, Kame binibigyan ng time at maganda o kahit maayos na buhay man lang? yeah, maybe the economy is the factor but I still would want to share this because this is really happening..I mean, even if the economy is the problem, they should be doing something about it and they should be strong enough. I should see them being like that because it’s their responsibility..even at free time, she doesn’t spend it with me, with us.. and it hurts my self-esteem..she really has a problem..and it’s affecting me much..she doesn’t spend time with me, with us..and I feel so betrayed, so irritable, so distracted already with what she’s doing - working during days when she has no work in the office (they have no work during fridays, she works from mondays to thursdays from 9 to 7, still she don’t make it a point to use the rest of the time being with me, with us) because I have talked it with her and for a while it stopped..but later did I know that it does not stopped..she works so much..so much that she has no time..she doesn’t plan for it..she did not ever..that is affecting me, us..she works at home and it’s not helping..because she makes the house like her own, like no one’s around, like as if other people, us children are not around. like she works on friday, even if she should use it to live..like she uses the house like her workplace and she fails to even talk with us, like she doesn’t know me and every person here..like she works from what 7pm during friday when she has no work? or maybe even before that to what 11pm, 12am,1am,2am in the house? like she works all day during the day that she should be taking a rest and spending it with me, with us! grrrr!!!! hos is that helping us? it is not! such an irritating site..i can’t see how it is for me, for us..people try to tell me that it’s for us, and this and that, but i can’t see how it’s for us when what she is doing hurts me..the worse thing is she even told me that masarap mag-work as if, I, we really don’t exist..and she doesn’t know what’s happening to the people around with what she is doing..no, it’s not for us, but it’s her selfish desire..she even want to work abroad, hurting me more to hear this because now that she is working here, she already has no time and she would add to that..as if to say, no, you’re not important, I am not important..she doesn’t have a clue..when will she wake up? she keep on delaying the time that she could spend for us as if there will always be a tomorrow and a chance but she might one day wake up realizing that I am already away from her, people are not around because she keeps on neglecting them..she keeps on delaying the time that can be spent with me, with us?she’s like that since I was a child, and I’ll keep on telling people about her bad behavior, for there should be zero tolerance on bad behaviors right? I may not be able to get a quick solution but I realized that facing this issue is a sign of strength..and I would face this..thank you for reading this..I hope this serves as a tool for people, especially mothers and fathers to avoid neglecting your children, never work too much that you fail to spend time with your children..children might seem to be quiet but I, we see you, everything that you do, everything that is happening..Children, speak up, it’s not bad to address some issues! if You’re mother and father is a workaholic, speak up! This is a real issue and this is evil!!! Just like what bo sanchez said, to speak no evil is evil! One parent told me, “Walang mali Sakin, nasa ginagawa nila yon.” I also hope that I’ll be different and I’ll avoid being like my mother..I hope I can refuse delaying time to be with people who are important to me..I hope that I’ll be able to see and to have a mother who can and will spend time with me and will become a good example in giving importance to every person..I hope I can value my friends and every one and that I can and I will spend time with them..I hope this could be the lesson for me to really value the people around me and that I become different from mother..Atleast I am aware of what she’s modeling? And I would value the people around me. Pray for me. I’ll pray for You. I hope there will be a solution the soonest time possible..I believe in truth and in God and God wouldn’t fail me, a righteous person, as Someone who follows God..I Am telling You My story to become more real right? Thanks again. I really appreciate this site, thank You. I appreciate Other People who loves God truly. GodblesS po all - children, teens, adults, for every Believers and non-believers as well. I am excited with what God would do after this. GodblesS and keep believing. God always hear Us. Sana marealize na ni mom na mali na yung ginagawa Niya. I affirm Other Parents who do a good job in Parenting. have faith all! I love God and every Believer. God loves Us! Thank You!

  409. just to include, to deprive children of time is an inhumane act..and even with husbands and wives nga, between friends, and between lovers inhumane na, nakakainis na, nakakabigay na ng panget na feeling, what more na Sakin mother/parent, right? I was deprived that’s why I feel violated by that..it gave me a sense or a feeling of not being secured because it’s as if to say work is much more important to me, there was no time for me during free time..

    to deprive Children of time/Our time is an inhumane act..

  410. I know that’s reasonable enough..Ü

  411. right?

  412. *what more na Sakin, mother/parent yun

  413. Mother-in-law — she’s the difficult person in my life. She’s a very controlling woman.. If she doesn’t have her way, she’ll give you cold shoulder and silent treatment. And I just could not stand it. She’s 76 years old and I’m 48. She goes to mass everyday but after the mass she still will not speak if she feels like it and it really irritates me. I want to show her respect and show that she’s important but the way she treats everyone really gets to my nerve so there are times when I ignore her also. Please help.

  414. Yes I have a difficult person in my life. My ex-husband, In fact I do not know if I can considered him as my husband because I am the second wife. He is legally married to the first. And now he left me for a third young woman.

    I am not just left to fend for myself personally but I was left to shoulder all the financial problems and legalities of the business that we both are managing before.

    I asked God to help me forgive to give me time to heal and forgive this man because the pain and hurt are so deep that everytime something came up and it concerns a problem that he did and I was forced to face it on top of the financial difficulties that I have. It is like a wound that is not healing.

  415. Shattered Dream
    Life is a matter of choice. I always believe on this. I chose to be with someone I love and I knew I also decided to choose a miserable life. He’s not really the perfect man but I always believe that we are meant for each other.Everything happened so fast, we met 2003, we became friends and lovers the next year, and before I knew it 2005 I was already married to him. On the same year, we also shared the precious gift from God, our angel.
    She’s the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen.
    Our married life was not easy. He was childish and only thinks of himself.He had an affair with another woman, perhaps I am not really good enough for him. At first, I tried to fight for our rights. I love him and I always want him to be the father of my children and be my husband. I want to grow old with him.I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want to die with him.Sad to say, I don’t know If he felt the same way too.
    I cried most of the time because It is my dream to have a happy and complete family. I didn’t want to give up. I never had one from my own family. I came from a broken a family.
    Unfortunately, I didn’t make it. We left him. I only wanted him time to think and reflect. I thought he would see our value.But the truth is, he enjoyed the freedom I gave him. He and his woman were free to do what ever they want. At first, I was really mad. I almost cursed him. I wanted them to suffer. I wanted them to die.How could they do this to me? How could you enjoy when you know what you’re doing is wrong, when you know that you are hurting someone?
    I gain strength from my own family and most especially from God. I lift up everything to Him. He knew my sufferings.I tried to pretend that I am strong for my daughter’s sake.
    One day, I realized that my hatred will not do anything good for me and for my child.And the reason why I am suffering is because they took my dream, a happy family and I still love him. I love him so much that I couldn’t accept the fact that he will do this me.
    So, little by little I tried to accept the reality, I talked to him, I shared little time of my child with him. He spent time with us again. During those times, I silently pray to God to touch his heart. I don’t have any idea what’s on his mind everytime he’s with us.
    Another foolishness of mine happened. I am bearing now our second child. I knew It was also my fault, allowing this to happen. I don’t have any choice but to accept it.I made another wrong decision. I pity my children for I know I can not give them the life I once desire. I can not promise them that they will have a happy family that every child dreams.
    I thought, everything would change, but as expected, Everything is still the same. He is not around during my sufferings. I have a critical condition but he only shows up when he likes. I am now going to give birth and still nothing changes. I still believe that this is not the life that God prepares for me and for my children.I still want him to be a good father in the eyes of my children.I remember, my daughter asked me once,” Bakit wala ako tatay, di nya tayo love?” I did’nt know what to say. I wanted to tell her. Yes, he doesn’t love us anymore!. But, of course I didn’t say that. I told her. ” Wala si tatay, because he is working but he will come home one day and will not leave us anymore and he loves us so much.” Oh, I don’t know If I answered it right.
    Now, if things didn’t work out,and my children will grow up and ask me the same question, I really don’t know how to answer them anymore.He is still continuing his affair with his woman, he still only thinks of himself, but I still believe that there is goodness within him. I know he is not happy. I still love him. Call me whatever you want.I know I am a saint for accepting this fact and allowing this to happen. Despite of everything, he is always welcome to come back. As long us God stays in my heart, I will not lose hope for my family.I know God will make a way and help me to give right answers for every question that my child will ask.
    Yes, It was a shattered dream but with God nothing is impossible. I knew that he has a better plan for me and for my family.

  416. Hi Bo,

    I’ve been trying to find a way to e-mail you but i think this is the next best thing. i wanted to approach you when you visited our school in january, but you were busy filming your show :)

    I am in the middle of a dry season in my life and I’m really struggling. It would have been easier for me to be mad at the world (like i used to when i was younger) but my conscience tells me to do otherwise. i’m only 20 but i feel that i’m burdened with stress from work that is filled with politics that i have not known before. Also, i’m in the middle of broken relationships in terms of my siblings.

    I believe this is God’s way of helping me, I am about to give up. I really want to start my life over.

    Please give me insight. thank you.

  417. wow! i can truly relate myself with this article…=)
    well for me, i have friends that are too frank and rude in giving comments most of the times. they are very manipulative to the point that one of our other friends can not say no whenever his phones are “borrowed”. in other words, they are bully, in a lighter way. and what i don’t like most about their attitude is that they love to back-stub.
    by yes, i still consider them as friends. it’s not because i don’t have a choice. actually, it was my choice: to stay with them in spite of their cruel personalities. why? because i consider them as a God-given test of my patience. yes. i was really having some problems with the temper before. i’m short-tempered. and when i met their real attitude, i’ve decided that i’ll stay with them for me to lengthen my patience…
    and i’m getting a lot a developments now. and for them, their getting nicer and nicer as we get along together.
    thank God!
    stay blessed..=)

  418. Difficult people in our lives? Are they part of God’s gifts to us?
    Well, I have had my shares of dealing with difficult people; And I would say, such was a great challenge and very much stressful. I have two people which i considered quite difficult to deal with; a colleague and my husband. Such is a struggle day in and day out.. Many times i lost my grip and i give in to the test/temptation (an eye for an eye..) But I realize this does do me more harm than good. Gradually I learn to offer my struggle to the Lord. I offer a prayer for them and for myself. Difficult people in my life give me the best of gifts from God, they teach me patience, understanding, humility, generosity, kindness,wisdom and love. Many times, i also see myself in them— and that is where I begin to pray for them, to seek for God’s grace to forgive and to be forgiven too. Difficult people made me realize my strengths and my limitations. These people come to our lives with a purpose. It is up to us to decide whether we take this challenge as an opportunity for growth or treat it as danger. Let us pray for one another. May God bless us with strong faith, faith that gives us courage to accept acceptance.

  419. wow!….
    God really has his ways!….
    I’ve just encountered a DIFFICULT PERSON in my work….
    im on the verge off erupting and allowing myself of thinking different ways on how to get even…..
    but then my cousin forwarded a link to this site and there it was….. my current dilemma…

    Do You Have a Difficult Person in Your Life?

    im okay now….
    i will try to understand her….
    maybe in the Difficult Person in her life right now…. hehehe
    will try my best to be less difficult…..

  420. wel, difficult person to deal with? i think that my fiance.. we have been together for more than 5 years. we broke up 2 years ago.. i was depressed, hurt, and felt so much pain, i feel rejected coz he jst said he dont love me anymore jst because of my attitudes,suplada, keep demanding his time, a wont demand if i ve never noticed that he changed a lot. i felt that my world stopped at that moment i dont know what know, ifelt dat i want to burst, and thanks to my friend because of her she help me to face that troubles in my life. she invited me to attend novena mass every wednesday, and through also with your inspirational books which i like to read everytime when i have, especially the kerygma afelt that the pain, hurs that i felt lessen. because of that event i feelclser to God.. so today, God give my fiance back to me but still i dont know what my fiance up to.. according to him he love me but i can feel it oftentimes.. he seldom txt me or communicate the reason is that no money.. sometimes i felt im tired of our relationships, feeling ko ako lang lahat ang gumagawa ng paraan to maintain our relationship.. im already 28 turning 29 and i also wanted to be married.. minsan d ko sya maintindihan.. Bro bo, pls pray for me and this fiance of mine..

  421. hi mam chrystal sol..nabasa ko kc ung reply nyo s taas e s raltionship ko kc with my gf e parang kaugali ko ung BF nyo…pg-usapan nyo po muna sana wg po kau bibitiw….advice lng po…

  422. Hi Bro Bo.

    I consider the most diffucult person in my life right now is my ex boyfriend who happens to be the owner of the company i am working with. We just broke up recently coz he just told me that his not ready for a serious commitment with me. I run away with him coz I am so afraid that if I see him with another lady I would not be in my sanity anymore. With almost 1 month i stayed with my cousins. Here I learned how to have a strong faith with God. I can say that I am now ok coz I am far from him. I am considering looking for another job here but still I cant find one. I realized that I sacrifices a lot of my happy moments because of one person who only hurts and coz me a lot o pains in my heart. I sacrificed my service to God and service with my community and my career just for him. I think I am a very selfish person of doing that. I am considering of going back there coz a lot of people is also suffering coz I left my job. I wanted to return there if I cant find a work here. Now I am praying so hard to the Lord to give me endurance to accept the pain and hurts that he causes me. I am praying that he will give me strength to love him more than anybody else.

    Please inlcude me to you prayers Bo coz I really needed the decernment as of the moment.

  423. difficult people? that’s easy, i have them in my home..

    For everybody to understand, i have this family with lots of conflicts.. I live with my parents, i have 3 siblings.. my brothers, eldest and and youngest are married.. the youngest with 2 kids and jobless and havent finish college.. they don’t live with us.. my sister is working abroad.. so, im left with my family..

    first, i having difficulty with my parents who always fight because my dad has issues about women.. everyday..every night i hear them fighting.. at times, i just lock myself in my room and listen to them..at times, i just can’t bare it anymore,i stay in my room crying and asking God why this issue does’nt end.. when ever i talk to them, they keep quiet and later on, continue arguing.i tell them how i feel and tell them how hard for me to be living with such situation. I belong to a community where i learned how to pray and worship God but everyday i hear them shouting at each other uttering bad words and cursing each other.. Do you know how hard that is for me.\? I envy my kapatids in the community coz they have good relationship with their parents while i struggle with my parents.Its so painful for me to hurt their feelings but they don’t consider how i feel. i know, im doing my part to help this family but what do i get in return.. nothing.. all pain.. i keep all this to myself.. i have no one to talk to..my sister, who is my best friend is not here.. my brothers, whom i can’t also rely on.. I feel so alone.. i feel so empty.. I always pray naman eh.. but it’s not enough if the people around me doesn’t pray with me to have a peaceful and happy family.. at times, i think that i don’t deserve my life. that i have done a lot of bad things that’s why im experiencing this.

    second, my youngest brother who is very irresponsible. did not finish school coz he got married young. Me and my sister provide for his family. you know what he does, drinking with his friends.. drinking and drinking.. he doesn’t work. he and his wife and kids stay at home and do nothing. just waiting for us to provide for them. Im very willing to help them but i also want them to realize that they also need to help themselves but what do i get.. nothing..

    third, my eldest brother, we helped him go abroad knowing that he would help after.. he married after a 9months.. leaving me and my sister all the responsibility..

    naawa na ko sa sister ko at sa sarili ko.. i think, all are life, we are stock with this family who doesn’t care about how we feel.i want to leave this house but i can’t leave them. what would happen if i leave my parents, they might kill each other. if i leave, what would happen to my pamangkins.. i just can’t bare the thought.

    bro bo, im trying to be this good daughter and sister but i feel that i want to give up already.i go to prayer meetings, i go out with my community friends just to be away from my family even for a short time. but this time is not enough. sometimes, i just want to end my life but i don’t want to hurt my sister and my mom. i love them so much to cause pain.

    i know that these difficult people needs to be understood but how about me.. i don’t want to get tired coz of them coz they are my family. im loosing my faith, im trying to fight this miserable life i have through prayers. I believe God is teaching me something but still i don’t get it.

    please help me.. i want to surrender everything to God and just let these things happen and keep on telling myself, THIS TOO SHALL PASS.. but when..

  424. hmmm…I have this friend, well, he’s actually my ex-boyfriend in high school. We’ve been together for a year and seven months. I have been so close to his family (until now) and his sister is one of my bestfriends.

    it’s been three years since we fell apart.

    It’s just so hard for me to spell him. I mean figure him out. I’ve been asking him to give “the two of us a second chance” but he always refuse.

    First, in personal conversation, he would tell me he is still in love with me. Then, when I got home, we would text me, “I don’t love you anymore”.and he’s been doing this repeatedly for four times. The same.

    And the latest, his sister invited me to come to her graduation celebration at their residence.

    We met again, and there again. All this time He’s been thinking I had a new boyfriend, when in fact, I am single.
    He’s right there in front of me with our friends with us on a single table. We were all chatting, and of course they tease us.

    Even though he’s right there in front of me, he can’t seem to look at me straight and instead he just sent me text messages to remind me that it’s late and I have to go home. Take note, texting me while I’m just right there in front. He then drove us home. And when I got home, he then sent again a text message, “It’s too late for me ‘coz you now have someone else”, I immediately replied ” No, I don’t have any commitment with a guy in a relationship now.”, then he said he wanted to talk to me the following day. But when the day comes, he again postponed our talk.

    Hmmmm…he is really weird. And every time his sister invites me in their house, he always can’t seem to look at me in the eyes. He talks rarely and always faces on the monitor of their computer or on the floor!!

    he always leave me hanging, in such a way he always make things vague.

    P.S., I have talked with his dad and he affirmed he never got another girlfriend since we broke up.

  425. What do you think he is??
    hmmmmmmmmm

    God Bless!!=”,=

  426. The most difficult person I have to deal with is my eldest sister. I used to get verbal abuses from her, telling me how useless I am, how my life is so easy as compared to her, how our mom spoilt me and would criticize my every move up even up until I had work and started earning on my own. I guess if she was not like that, I would not have strived hard to prove that I was none of what she said I was. It came to a point that I was forced to answer back and she banned me from miggling with my niece and nephew up till they left for Canada. This really broke my heart and thinking baout it still breaks my heart.

    She also is so difficult that she sppits out vile words at my mom, which I cant take. My mom says a bad spirit must be possessing her, so we just pray for her and dont communicate with her anymore.

  427. I am living with a very difficult person but she is someone I can never get away from.

    There are days when I do question her existence, when I would fantasize about killing her.

    She does stupid things most of the time. Nobody likes her and if she dies I bet only her family would attend her funeral and only because they have no other choice. She is a dead weight. She brings the worst out of people.

    I remember reading at one time that the devil planted weeds among the crops planted by God. She is one of the weeds.

    Who is she?

    I am She.

  428. after reading most of the comments left in this site, i felt relieved in a way knowing that God has plans for each of us and we all have our own difficult persons in our lives yet despite that fact we manage to forgive and love the person back..my most difficult person i can say is my bf or should i say now my ex bf. we’ve been together for 7yrs and 10 months now looking forward to our 8th yr anniv but then that will not gonna happen anymore since ive decided to end this relationship just few days ago. i know i am still hurting but then i need to learn that if i let myself be abused by this person i will live mylife miserably. he may not be like other guys who abuses their gf/wife physically but i can say i am abused emotionally. emotionally tortured because he has cheated on me a lot of times..more than 15x at least? but i am still here for him. i would always ask him to choose between me and the other woman and he would always choose me. as he would always say i am his “main” girl and they are just his “branches’. wheneve he gets caught he will just beg for my forgiveness and promise wont do it again..and i would always forgive him hoping and praying that he will change. but that change i was hoping never came. he remained a womanizer, and i would always make myself believe that there is hope in this relationship…but then i was wrong, so wrong that i have to convince myself that this have to come to an end. what’s even harder for me right now is that we live together for 2 yrs now. we live here abroad and we live in a place we both dont have any immediate family, dont have friends (friends other than co-workers). no nothing. we literally started from scratch. the reason i got in this place was because i got a sponsorship from a reputable company. i am doing well with my work and i have to thank God for it and with that i am able to somehow help my family. now, i want him completely out of my life, i want to regain the respect and love i deserve. i know God has better plans for me and in time will give me the right person. i know things will not be easy for me specially now i have to live on my own. get use to not seeing him anymore..but then, with Gods grace i know someday i would look back and tell myself that i made the right decision. this decision which for me is a life changing decision which will benefit me in the end. i acknowledge the fact that this aint will be easy..i will go thru a lot of soul searching and may sometimes feel i may have done the wrong choice. but with Gods help he will set me free.

  429. The most difficult person I have to deal with is my brother in law.I am married for almost 4 years.I work before in middle east and wen i got pregnant my husband ask me to stay im my inlaws until i gave birth.My brother inlaw at that time is only 10 years old.Sobrang pasayaw at mukhang pera.problema nya lagi yong pera.palasumbong kahit maliit na bagay.My brother inlaw is very close to my husband.Actually my brother inlaw is a half brother of my husband they have different father but they are so close.sobrang sumakit po ulo ko nung nasa kanila pa ako.walang friends yong batang yan because of his attitude.Ngayun po bumalik na kami sa middle east with my husband and my son.My son is planning to get him and to continue his studies here in middle east.dahil yong mami nya hndi mabantayan yong bata at lagi nag susumbong yong bata na binubugbug daw sya ng mami nya.Brother BO ayoko po sya pumunta dito panu nalang anak ko magiging bad influence sya tsaka for sure hndi kami mag kakaintindihan ng bro inlaw ko,ayoko sa ugali nya.ang problema ko po sarado isip ng asawa ko everytime na mag open up ako regarding his brother lagi lang kami nagaaway sinasabi nya lagi sakin nag iisang kapatid ko nga lang hndi mo pa mapagbigyan.Bro Bo nahihirapan na po ako anu po ang gagawin ko????please help me hndi ko kaya ugali ng kapatid nya kami nga mag asawa lagi nag aaway sya pa na sobrang naiinisan ko.kaya nya imanipulate husband ko kakaibang bata. please reply po sa email ko maraming salamat God bless!!

  430. The most difficult person I have to deal with is my brother in law.I am married for almost 4 years.I work before in middle east and wen i got pregnant my husband ask me to stay im my inlaws until i gave birth.My brother inlaw at that time is only 10 years old.Sobrang pasayaw at mukhang pera.problema nya lagi yong pera.palasumbong kahit maliit na bagay.My brother inlaw is very close to my husband.Actually my brother inlaw is a half brother of my husband they have different father but they are so close.sobrang sumakit po ulo ko nung nasa kanila pa ako.walang friends yong batang yan because of his attitude.Ngayun po bumalik na kami sa middle east with my husband and my son.My Husband is planning to get him and to continue his studies here in middle east.dahil yong mami nya hndi mabantayan yong bata at lagi nag susumbong yong bata na binubugbug daw sya ng mami nya.Brother BO ayoko po sya pumunta dito panu nalang anak ko magiging bad influence sya tsaka for sure hndi kami mag kakaintindihan ng bro inlaw ko,ayoko sa ugali nya.ang problema ko po sarado isip ng asawa ko everytime na mag open up ako regarding his brother lagi lang kami nagaaway sinasabi nya lagi sakin nag iisang kapatid ko nga lang hndi mo pa mapagbigyan.Bro Bo nahihirapan na po ako anu po ang gagawin ko????please help me hndi ko kaya ugali ng kapatid nya kami nga mag asawa lagi nag aaway sya pa na sobrang naiinisan ko.kaya nya imanipulate husband ko kakaibang bata. please reply po sa email ko maraming salamat God bless!!

  431. Bro. Bo

    Talagah nga palang di maiiwasan na me isang taong magpapasaway at ikaw ang naatasan ni Lord na makunsumi niya ..Everything is a gift thats what ive learned.. So if this is a gift (burden0 .. geh Lord ill accept the challenge .. May God gave us tons of patience and strenght para maitama angmali ng taong ito .. just our Lord always say NEVER GIVE UP…

  432. I have a colleague who has been saying a lot of nasty things about me when in fact we are not even on hi-hello terms. We know each other by name but that’s the only thing that connects us. I simply ignore her. People are telling me she’s angry at me, for what reason I have absolutely no idea. I just shrug them off. I believe that’s her problem and I refuse to have anything to do with it. It’s her baggage, not mine.

    I feel sad though that she says not so good things about me and that she’s angry at me - it’s such a waste of energy.

    My only consolation is that she is like that to almost everybody in the office. With a reputation such as hers, the best thing to do is ignore her.

  433. This is such a timely article to read, I’ve been very anxious for weeks since one of the most difficult persons in my life will be coming home and I am obliged to care for her! Of course, I have to cuz I love her . My husband loves her so much. My daughter loves her so much too, It’s just that she is really such a difficult person to please. You may have guessed right , she’s my mother-in-law.

    She is a loving and caring mother but she tends to be very grouchy, always complaining and criticizing other people. Right now, she is very ill and will be brought home because she prefers to be back here in the Philippines where she tends to get her way every time . She doesn’t want to take in her medications on time or sometimes even throws away her expensive medications. She insists on eating food that is restricted for her. Otherwise she would ignore you for the rest of the day. She has been giving her other children a difficult time too. So, that leaves me to take care of her while I’m not that busy this time.

    Everyday I pray to God to help me to bless her and my other in-laws. I try to be a good person to them because they are my husband’s family.

    Please pray for me!

  434. ako difficult person…lahat naman tayo nagiging diffucult person lalo na pag yung gusto natin ay hindi nasusunod..

  435. all people are difficult person.. hindi nga natin alam kung paano ang tamang balanse sa pakikipagugnayan sa kapwa.Hindi ba? nakikibagay lang tayo lahat sa daloy ng ano mang bagay…. we pray na lang hindi ba na sana wal tayong difficult person na makaharap sa araw2x na pamumuhay…

  436. at the moment, i am facing with some difficult people.. the way they handle things really slices me into pieces.. please help pray that i’ll be able to overcome all of this obstacle.. i do know that hte Lord gives us difficulties for He will make it into wonderful oppurtunities… help me pray please….

  437. hi brother bro,

    I read your articles and it really inspires me a lot. at least may pinagkakabalahan ako na nakakatulong sa akin and kahit pano nag open sa mind ko about realities of life.

    I have this difficult people here in my work especially my boss and one of my office mate. Last year, something happens that makes it hard for me to stay here na. I can say na i’m not happy anymore. I can’t resign nman knowing na it’s really hard to find another job. Nag aapply nman ako sa iba kaya lang wala pa din result eh.

    Bket ba may mga ganong klaseng tao? Mabuti na nga ung pinakita mo sa knila pro in the end ikaw pa din ung lumalabas na masama. Ngayon lang ako naka encounter ng mga ganitong tao.. cguro it was challenge for me to be with these difficult people, be more patient and understanding.

    God guide me and give me more strength to handle all of these. I’m praying that God will touch their hearts too.

    Thank you po..

  438. One of my office mates gave me the link of your article and it made me smile because I also have difficult persons to share with in this article. When I had my first job, I realized that I am so lucky because I belong in a company na pamilya turingan sa isa’t-isa at mayroon akong boss maka Diyos at maganda ang pakikitungo sa mga empleyado. But then nung tumagal at lumaki na yung company marami ng pagbabago ang naganap; ang mga dati kong kaibigan sa opisina, biglang nag-iba ang ugali nung nailagay sila sa mataas na position. Nandyan na yung yumabang sila, nawawala na ang respeto sa kapwa nila at sila pa yung unang nagtsitsismis sa kapwa nila. I was very disappointed and angry when I found out that two of my closest friend and our boss na sobrang tinitingala at nirerespeto ko fight behind my back, sila yung naturingan na nasa mataas na position tapos ganun sila kung lumaban! Hindi patas dahil hindi ko man lang maipagtanggol yung sarili ko sa mga masasamang sinasabi nila tungkol sa akin. Sinubukan ko silang iconfront pero ako pa din yung lumabas na masama sa paningin ng lahat ng tao sa opisina..masakit yun para sa akin kasi alam kong wala akong ginagawang masama! Pero I cannot please everybody kaya hinayaan ko nalang. Hindi ko alam bakit may mga ganung tao, minsan naisip ko na bakit pa sila pinakilala skin ni God eh puro stress lang ang binibigay nila sa akin! Nakakapagod at paulit-ulit lang nangyayari araw araw sa opisina…

    There’s a point in my life na nakita ko na wala ng nangyayaring maganda sa career ko at gusto ko ng mag give up, I wanted to resign…I seek silence and prayed to God that he would give me strength and what will I do. Through the help of my family and friends, I decided not to resign because there is no new work opportunity for now. I am hoping for a change and maybe they will realize they have mistakes too and I wanted them also to realize that I’m not doing anything wrong and I cannot please them. I came there to work and not for personal interests.

    I want to thank God for giving me those difficult people in my life and I don’t regret having that experienced. I want to say Thank You also to those difficult people, thank you for hurting and insulting me it made stronger. I learned so much from all of you and it makes me a better person right now. I know that someday God will take my career in a different direction and I will move onto new opportunities and challenges.

  439. i just resigned from work because of the great intensity of meanness of more than ten who even conspired and plotted every negative they could do to hurt me..from my boss to more than ten co-employees. with the fact that i did no wrong to them. i wanted to preserve my being civil and so is my education and character so i did quit. i feared, my work will be sabotaged. i thought ignoring them and plastic greeting will somehow mitigate them,,it only triggered them to do more. so better quit! may the heaven take care of them!

  440. Like what the Bible says, “as iron sharpens iron” if there’s no friction between two objects there won’t be any heat produced, and if nothing is produced, nobody will benefit from it. Difficult people teaches us to appreciate pleasant ones, difficult people teaches us to be humble and to mind our own character at times we are also being difficult to somebody else. (:

  441. i am not really sure if he is a difficult person..he showers me with gifts, pays a lot of attention to me. I know there aren’t any romantic issues involved. We are very close friends and it just so happens that he has a lot in life than I have. The thing is, he is living a wayward life. He goes out of country every month just to go clubbing and drinking. Last week he went again, and when I saw him today, he has wounds on his hands and he’s telling me he just got into a fight. He believes in God but then he’s also saying that if he has to follow GOd’s word, he will be deceiving himself, saying that the day adam ate that apple, we are already damned. He told me he can’t connect when I brought him to the feast and he can’t understand how one can be happy in the arms of God.
    I want to help him and ease his pain/hurts whatever they are..to let him know God better and that it is possible to be happy in God. But I am afraid and I don’t know how to do. I am so desperate to let him see the beautiful side of being in God’s love but I don’t know how..when I try to talk about it (as gently as I can) he is not interested at all…and doesn’t even argue with me…he just let it slip away…help!!!

  442. I’m glad to have read this article…My present difficulty is dealing with my mother and eldest sister. Sometimes I really do wonder why God did not bless me with a mother and sister with healthier personalities. Maybe I’m being too demanding but since childhood I have kept resentment towards these two significant people in my life to the point of my undergoing psycho-therapy at age 28 to try to heal my relationship with them.
    My mother is, sad to say, still emotionally immature at age 60+. She expects people to love her all the time and is depressed when the opposite happens. She doesn’t request, she demands, but is unaware of it. She shouts her holiness to the whole world by her shallow religiosity but is in fact bossy, high-handed and proud. She is not open to comments or criticism, she doesn’t listen to others, only to her bruised ego. Even my 4-yr old daughter says she doesn’t like her grandmother. The reason I see is my mother expects my daughter to be loving towards her but is never quite giving or loving herself, at least not in the way of loving that is pure and sincere. Her value system could be summarized as being too kind to the point of being abused, loving without discipline and responsibility. Her kind of love and kindness are not gospel-based but self-based. She is kind because she expects people to be kind to her. She is loving in a sense because she desires that she be loved in return. When these are not returned, then “hell hath no fury for the poor ones who have the audacity to reject the kindness or love she offered…”
    My sister on the other hand could probably be canonized saved for her offensive attitude towards people. She’s constantly critical, expects people to be like her in all things because she has set very high standards for herself that even she can’t reach. She depresses me when I’m with her because she finds it her mission in life to sermonize everyone who comes her way whom she finds lacking in character or effort to be as successful as she is. The disappointing thing is, like my mothr, she is deeply religious, but without the holiness.
    My pressing problem is how to make these two people understand that they are pushing people away from them rather than towards them by their lack of openness for dialogue or fraternal correction which is what I believe they need most at this time.
    Please help! I’m in a bind!

  443. thank u for a wonderful topic.

  444. i want to share something,i’ve noticed that almost 50% of the sharer here, ang common agony is the husband,well ganun din ako,but this trial makes us solid as family ,,well ganito story ko mabait at masipag ang husband ko but sometimes me kahinaan din,he had an affair with 19y/o nursing student well, an online affair in progress kasi nagkikita sila.sad to say nahuli ko sya and dun nagstart ung prob,i think ako un most affected kasi mawalan ako ng interest to pursue my dreams like di na k makapag concentrate sa bus and parang too much depression ,i am very thakful to God that he gave the strength to my husband to re arrange our lives kasi kung ako im wasted talaga,i cannot do thing that time as if im insane na,well my husband really do change we pray every night and we serve God by being active in church. at this point in time , ako ata un difficult person nya kasi until now di ko pa masabi kung nakapag move on na ako.i hope somebody could give some advice.thank u and keep our Faith in GOD!!!

  445. this past months.. my mga taong, lgi n lng akong tntignan ng msama… sa skul.. ala aman akong gngawa s knla…
    prng my ka2iba.. isa clang grupo ng mga gurls…
    lgi kong cnsbe n.. bale wla un.. peo d ko tlga kya..
    klasmyts cla ng bf ko..
    sbe ng mga fwends ko insecure daw..
    peo grbe n tlga.. di ko cla kila2 peo ilng beses ko b dapat clang mkita n nkatingin skin..
    at khit na mgkatinginan n kmi.. ala p dn epekto grbe ang manhid nla..
    yun p aman ang pnka ayaw ko s lhat ng tao.. ala akong gngwang msma s knla, di ko cla inaaway, at ala din akong mtndaan n atraso sa knla, peo bkt gnun??
    grbe..2wing nki2ta ko cla nccra tlga arw ko! sna nga wg ko n clang mkita haizt!
    usto ko lng aman mging msya eh.. peo hnggang anjan cla, d ata mngya2ri un!!!!

    tnx for this.. and i will be glad if you really give me some advise…

    i’ll pray to God that, someday, they shall be awaken!

  446. bo,

    i am a wife with two children and with a womanizer husband… please just pray for me… the pain of knowing that he dont love me at all is killing me. and i have to pretend that im okay to all of them just to keep evevrything as it should be. Bo, please tell me what to do.pray for me to have peace… pray for me so god can look at me

  447. 1st bf ko po, 25 nko nun at 27 sya, peruano at nagkakilala kami sa work d2 sa abroad. Nung una testing lng ba par masabi na magka-bf, hanggang sa magsama kami at magsimula ang kalbaryo ng buhay ko. Una plang prang kwestyon na pgkatao nya saken, sguro dahil naren sa language barrier namen… natali ako nung una sa awa hanggang sa mapamahal na sya saken. Katulad din po ng ibang lalaki womanizer ang bf q, kya un ang madlas pagsimulan ng away nmen ksi idadahilan nia na outing ng kompanya pero lalabs lng pla sya kasama mga babae nia. Hanggang sa sinasaktan na nya ko, sguro dhil sa kaka-nag ko 2ngkol sa babae nia. Nung una naimune na nga ko sa pananakit nya kya umabuso at halos minsan eh patayin nako. Ang masakit pa nun sa 2 taong pagsasama nmen eh siguro 6 na buwan lng sya merong trbaho at dahil nga sa awa hindi ko pren sya matiis at ako ang sumasagot ng lahat ng expenses nia (isama pa ang luho nia panigarilyo at pang-beer). Pag naiisip ko ngayun, ung dapat padala ko sa pamilya ko eh sa kanya na halos lahat napupunta… hindi pa dun ngtapos ang pagka-pasaway nia dahil sa kalagitnaan ng kawalan nia ng trbaho at ako nmn eh kakasimula parin sa niliptan kong work, nagawa niang nkawan ng 6 na lpad ang kapatid ko (30 thousand sa pinas) Kung panu nia ginwa, eh mhabang kwento napo…pero ang tanung ko eh kunsan nia gagamitin? malamng sa babae o sa pang -bisyo nia. Ung 2 kaptid ko na ksama q d2 sa abroad at pati pamilya ko sa pinas ay naninikluhod na saken upang hiwalayan ko ang bf ko. Pero ewan ko po ba kung bakit sa tuwing magmamakaawa sken at mananakot na sya’y magpapakamatay eh hindi ko tlga kyang tigisin. Nitong nkaraan nga lng pasko nakausap ko ang isa sa babae nia at sa galit nia na kinakausap ko eh pinutol nia cellphone ko, kya hanggang ngyon na wala na sya eh aq paren ang ngbabayad ng sinira nyang phone… Pero talaga nga pong God works in so many ways ksi nitong mayo lng po ay napilitan ng umuwi ng Peru ang bf ko dhil hindi na nya marenew ang visa nya dahil sa napasabay sa krisis at ultimo pamilya nya d2 ay di na sya mtulungan. Akala ko po sa huling sandali man lng eh mkuha nia maging tpat sken kahit na hindi na nya ihingi ng twad ang nga pananakit nya sken, pero bkit po ganun? 1 day before his flight, tinangka nia pong iwithdrw ang pera ko sa bangko na alam nmn niang pambayad ko sa expenses d2. Nung lumabas po sya ng apt. pra bumili lng sndali sa labas sya nmn pong kutob ko at pgtingin ko nga sa wallet ko eh wala ang atm ko, halos liparin ko po ang bangko para maikansela ang atm ko…buti nlng hindi nia nkuha ang lmn. Paguwi nia ng aprtment snabi ko sa kania na nwawala ng atm ko, ang dmi nia aliby, hinayaan ko nlng. Hindi nmn nia kailangan ako nkwan pa, ipinmili ko na sya ng nga bagong gamit para sa paguwi nya sa bansa nila eh hindi nmn sya magmukhang kawawa, pinabaunan ko na sya ng panggastos nya(psp,kahit meron krisis d2 ngaun) bakit ganun? Umaga ng kaniyang flight, last request pa sya ipagluto ng adobo, pinabaunan ko pa sya ng sandwich at bka gutumin sya sa daan papuntang airport. Pero hanggang sa huling sandali, hindi sya huningi ng tawad hindi rin sya nagpasalamt, inilbas nya na mga maleta nya humalik saken at lumabas ng bahy. At ako hanggang sa ngayon ay naiwang laging tulala, sa kakaisip kung bakit? kung san ako nagkamali? kung panu ko mgsisimulang muli? Pacencia npo kau at para telenovela tong kwento ko, gusto ko lng po mailabas at sana po ay matulungan nyo ko Bro. Bo… thank you po sa space n2.

  448. I do believe that we are almost always surrounded by diffiuclt persons. Most were placed by God to test our patience, understanding and perseverance. In the end we find ourselves evolving into persons who have been able to handle the so called difficult people. My patience has beent ested over and over again by my husband and in laws. My husband who says sorry each time he commits a mistake only to commit the same mistake the following week…… so trying and so disappointing…. My in-laws who after showing your malasakit over what they are going through will tell everyone that you are throwing your weight around the house….. these are people who will ask for your help but kapag naibigay mo na will readily depict you as pakialamera….. Para bang someone has to take the cudgels….

    It is indeed tiresome but God will never give us trials that we won;t overcome…. trials that will amke us stronger and become better persons….. It’s not that we are masochists but things happen for a reason…. reasons that will ring out the best in us….

  449. kuya bo

    at this point in my life i really want to say, i want to be free.
    i dont know wat to do anymore.

    my difficult person is making me into someone who is never me. i cant decide somthing for my own. because whenever i do, lahat ay nakaka sakit sa buhay niya. every decisions that i make is one big difficult thing to do. everything i do is always hell to her. i just cant become me trying everything, committing mistakes, learning the experiences… i just cant be me.

    i am her difficult person.
    and shes my difficult person too.

    i just cant have a heart to heart talk to her because her decisions are always based on what she would feel…

    pls help

  450. hello kuya bo!

    at this very moment i am really hurt, annoyed and i just want to scream all my anger!! i am a very patient person. i would do anything to please other people to go out of my way to help kahit nalulubong na ako sa utang dahil sa awa!! but you know what’s the saddest part kuya bo is that they can’t even remember the good things i have done for them. sometimes i just wish to pray bad things for them..but of course i can’t for i know that God doesn’t want that. right now i really am hurting. family and siblings and friends who are selfish and self-centered who only thinks about their own happiness about themselves. i was there 24/7 when they needed me. i don’t have double thoughts when they need money but now that i am in dire need they can’t even remember!!! could i just delete them from my life???? sometimes i feel how come God allows me to experience all these things to have all these kind of people in my life. when i have stayed so faithful in Him even how hard the cross i bear :( but i know i just have to be patient and know and believe that God will do great things in my life.

    hope you can email me.

    p.s. kuya bo m so happy receiving messages from God whispers..it helps a lot and i could just hear and see the smile of Jesus relaying the message to me! thank you

  451. Hi Brother Bo,

    I have been a reader of Kerygma, Companion and Didache since 1980’s. Coming from a poor family, I find it hard to buy a copy but I just read them from our school library. It serves as my daily companion and map. You have been my Kuya ever since (though you’re not aware of it.Ü) For years, adversities have become bearable even during my lowliest of times because of your inspiring words. Up to now, I always see to it that I read my copy of God’s daily message and it keeps me going and inspired. I believe in your words indeed, “no man is poor that he cannot give or rich that he do not need”.

    Thanks to you and more power!!!

  452. Difficult people come and go in our lives, it is how we deal with them that will shape our character and in the end, still grateful that we have them around.

    I think the best lesson these people taught me is the realization that I myself is not perfect and so are these people.

    Thanks for this article, it feels good to know that I am not alone in this struggle.

    Thanks Bo,

    Be blessed!

    Liana

  453. yes, i really have a very difficult person in my life…she’s the worst i ever met…to tink that she’s related to me by blood…i dont know waht to call her anymore…she’s so careless, dont even know how to think of others..so selfish…God!
    But still i know God wants me to forgive her and not to ba mad at her for all her wrongdoings and shortcomings..we’re not perfect…i know but she’s really worse…(’ ‘,)
    i’m gaining more wisdom and i keep on understanding (but not always…)God forgive me…
    thanks kuya bo…

  454. The most difficult person is named Babylyn Alvarez who happens to be linked with my husband. Sadly we’re on the same group since my boss transferred me. It’s so annoying to see her at same area. And talagang kumukulo dugo ko pag nakikita ko tong taong ito. Thanks God I can still control my self from saying bad words especially kapag face to face na kaming nagkikita sa CR, canteen and sa area ko. And I’m still hoping I could forgive this person na wala na yatang kahihiyan. Para gumaan na rin ang dibdib ko at bahala ang Diyos sa kanya.

    Please pray for me to overcome this situation and also pray for her and her family dahil pareho kaming pamilyado.

    Thank you so much.

  455. Difficult people in my life?
    My EX,
    talking to me like nothing happened.
    He talks and stabs me behind my back by his lies
    So I decided not to talk to him anymore.
    Not to see his shadows anymore.
    Not to let him see me anymore.

    So no more hunting for bad words to say to him nor any single words from him.

    I just do not know if It my kids are happier if their separated parents to not talk to each other,, I am BLIP ing sure that their hearts are bleeding. I am bled to death, how can I rebound?

  456. Indeed God knows whats in our hearts but sometimes I thought why cant He see the pain I have with a difficult son who for all these years treated me rudely and is just nice when he needs some things from me. He ia manipulative too and will create an incident so that I will go his way with the things he wants. He’s 30….a poor and lazy employee, doesnt help me with my expenses and at that age still lives with me in short I feed him and nothing in return except more heartaches everyday.I had wanted to encourage him to get married but I have second thoughts because he might get a wife and still lives with me anyway gosh! I feel like malas na nga ako sa husband pati pbanaman sa anak? Its breaking my heart to pieces I dont feel peace and I’m already 58 and soon be a senior citizen and at least I want a peaceful life and age beautifully but I dont think I will with this kind of son who lives with me and makes life more defficult. Please enlighten me because I’m at the end of my rope. God bless you.

  457. Difficult people in our lives transform us the way we want our lifes to be, it’s a matter of choice on whether
    you still go through God’s way or your way,,,if you the choose other way besides God’s then your lost. Still and will always be right is to walk on the path, God is giving you, and that is to forgive and love this person in
    return no matter what it takes. Which involves patience,humility and understanding..

  458. i was a very lucky kid when i was young, all my family members loved me very much. when i was in my fifth grade my auntie adopt me to study in their town, with my uncle. when i was younger, they always attend me and treat me as their own child. but as i grew up, some demons are alluring around me, other members of the household always called me Gay or bisexual but i’m not. because of that i always hated myself and found other things to do. that’s why i get addicted to computer games. i often steal money from my auncle and auntie just to play computer games and thay always get angry at me,I cant control myself!,. One christmas (2007) i’ve lost my auntie’s friend’s cellphone and they accused me of stealing it because of my previous doings, but i swear to God, i did not do it. they punished me (believing i’m lying) time to time. that night i decide that they will not going to believe me that’s why i drank a poison mixed with water(hoping that i will not going to awake next morning)but i failed. they even someone to make me confess of the thing that i did not do. that guy punched me in my stomach and smashed me very hard with a pillow and he pinched me very hard in my neck. i feel so worthless that time. the date was dec 27, my uncle arrived last night i feared of being punished by him so that i desperately get a razor and as the time the door in their room opened i slashed the razor in my wrist as a suicide but mysteriously my blood flow was very slow that is why i keep on razoring it but still no blood flow. they rushed me to the clinic but the clinic was closed so that they gave me a first aid(but sadly the time that my cousin saw me in blood she still bothers of her room’s dirt not to my condition i remember they said:linisin mo muna tong kwarto mo baka mapagalitan ka ni boss! that’s what i heard of our household help. after some time my uncle still don’t believe me he told me that my laceration was a FAKE! i really got hurt. but they still don’t believe me, my auntie paid for the lost item. NOW after 2 years still one of the household help wrecked my image on my uncle and auntie’s eyes, she do everything so that my life would me miserable i don’t know what is her problem i just pray to God that God will going to protect me always. now she accused me of opening the drawer of cash last sunday (even though i know she just forget it opened because she is talking with someone else and i can prove it!) and she told my uncle and auntie that i do it even though she is not sure of. i’m hoping that God will give me more and more strengtht to live my life the next days. :[

  459. I believe that I am the difficult person, not them. Yes, I get mad, disappointed and hurt. I get irritated to the point that I want to fly away to another country, start my whole life all over again and just come back to my friends and family when I am no longer harboring negative feelings towards other people. I hate it that I feel bad about other people knowing that I’m not perfect myself. I dont want to hold grudges. I dont want to feel hatred, sadness and pain. I believe its not my purpose in life to brood and complain to God why some things are happening in my life. Like maybe I deserve everything bad that’s going on in my Life. I just want to be happy and live harmoniously with other people. I hope that God will send someone who will make me forget all the things that make me bitter about other people. they don’t deserve my rantings. and I dont want other people to suffer because I cant move on with my life. I know I should be kind to everyone… whether they deserve my kindness or not. I really should practice the turn-your-other-cheek trick. I guess it’s a matter of focusing on good things. God should be the center of my life.

  460. The only difficult person in my life is my ex-husband. Though I ve tried my very best to understand him and not to be affected I sometime I gave up. I think my prayers are not good enough.
    May God bless us with peace, happiness, and forgiveness for each other.
    Pray for us please.

  461. this article is two years old but i can’t help adding my own reply.

    the most difficult person in my life right now is my boss. he’s very religious, the kind who can produce rosaries and novena booklets and bibles from his pocket anytime of the day. we work in an establishment which helps other people. everyone think he’s nice and all, but underneath that mask, im really convinced he’s a monster!

    i know im also the most difficult employee for him because i don’t follow his orders, especially when it involves sinning to God or breaking the law. he always orders me to lie to people and deceive others so we’d gain more money and stuff. he demoralizes employees, violates basic human rights, violates labor laws and all, but i don’t allow him to get away with it, i report his illegal wrongdoings to authorities. he has no remorse for all the bad things he’d done, and he still keeps on doing them even after being caught.

    now he’s been harassing me for over a month so i’d resign. But im staying put. God gave me this job and ive accepted it. ill continue fighting for what is GOOD and what is RIGHT. (haaaay. even if it means i might cry almost every night).

    pleeeeeease. pray for him? and me?

  462. […] be sure Todd isn’t a bad guy. He’s just irresponsible and unable to handle his own finances. In fact Todd has difficulty managing many aspects of his life. In other areas, he is quite […]

  463. i hate one of my co worker,she come 2 our cabin drunk and did not even care that there are people sleeping…but if she is da one sleeping she doesn;t want to hear any single word..she is so selfish and act like she is da boss in da cabin..when she laugh it was like der is no tommorow…i cant find a reason to understand her coz even her closes fren,she would say lots of bad things..i cant believe she was like that..she is too rude and mean..

  464. i have very annoying office mates.. they always try to pull me down and get me into trouble. they even try to break my good image to my boss. i came to a point that i almost gave up and wanted to just resign, but i didn’t. because i don’t want them to win in their evil works. i want to prove to them that i have a strong character and im not easily shaken by non-sense, petty issues. but despite of their behaviors and attitudes, i still thank them because i learned to be patient, understanding and loving. i grew up and become matured physically, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.. and most importantly, i learned to trust God.. whenever i have problems w/ them, i just pray. then, eventually, i became happy again. i live to please no one but God so i just ignore them until they became tired doing and saying bad things about me.

  465. hi bro.Bo,
    a good afternoon to you..hmmm..difficult person? “c father”
    his the reason why my mother got stress & depress since we we’re a child because of having an affair to someone until now his already a lolo,at the age of 53 ayaw ng mother ko hiwalayan para buo parin ang family..:-( its very sad on my part, sobrang martir ng mother ko….pro Im hoping na darating din ang time na magbabago sya.. and I know n my plan si Lord para sa pagbabago nya..bro. Bo, pls. include us in your prayer to still have strong growing faith…thank you and God Bless!

  466. hello bro bo,
    yes i have encountered a lot of difficult people in my life from my family to friends and workplace…but the distinct ones are my inlaws and my coworkers…my inlaws i learned to forget them…my coworkers were the worst because they made me resign from my good job just to avoid them because my world was getting smaller and smaller everyday…my so called friends whom i trust will somehow saved me never did anything to save me…i was left alone…i planned to make revenge but somehow somthing was preventing me from doing it…i tried forgetting them and most of all escaping from their terrors that incessantly haunt me when i was with them…now i’m letting go and erasing them from my mind so i can move on…may God bless them…

  467. hi bro bo,
    merong isang babae na actually feeling ko nahaharrass nko verbally,it stared when my live-in partner had an affair with her.actually im not the legal wife pero hiwalay na ang partner ko sa wife nya. magkasama sila sa isang project but they are from different company.when i found out na may relasyon sila,i confronted him,pero sabi niya…wala lng daw.then this girl started to send messages to me.BKIT KO DAW SILA GINUGULO?WAG DAW AKONG NAKIKIALAM.at Marami pang ibang messages na hindi ko pinapatulan dahil sa aksaya lng ng load,aksaya din lang ng pnahon.hinahayaan ko lng sya,and besides may anak ako na dapat kong pagtuunan ng pansin.i just pray na sna matauhan na sya and pls.prat din po for me.really need it.

  468. Now thats one hard question, what kind of special gift is God giving to me for me to have the most difficult mom in the world?

    I dont know… I have to admit the presence of my mom hurts me so much that I’d rather stay 24hrs on my room than see her loud voice talking trash talk about me. and yes, she’s my mom. i love my mom but the emotional tortures that I get from her are sometimes unbearable to the point that it crushes my spirit. Her presence makes me feel so unlove and unworthy for any happiness… She is so difficult to handle. This kind of creature is so difficult because she is not just my boss but my mom…

  469. i thank and praise God kasi nagbago na yung pinaka-hate kong tao before.. my brother in law..

    almost 5 years ko siyang pinag-pipray..dumating nga sa point na gusto ko siyang ipabugbog (sorry Lord!)

    let me share you an inspiring quote..
    ” BE THANKFUL FOR THE DIFFICULT PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE; THE ANNOYING, THE SAD, THE BITTER, EVEN THE CRUEL BULLIES. GOD HAS PUT THEM THERE TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. IT IS ONLY THROUGH DEALING WITH THEM, THAT HE IS ABLE TO SHOW YOU..THE REAL YOU..’.

    sobrang natouch ang puso ko dito..

    Be blessed and be a blessing!

  470. Being a leader is indeed a difficult role for me. Handling different personalities is really a big challenge. Out of 13 people, there are really difficult ones to handle… (stubborn, disrespectful, wanting their own schedule, neglecting duties, etc). Some are even older than me. Since the role was given to me, all I need to do is to deliver what is expected from me. Everyday they teach me to be patient and diplomatic. Before I start my day at work, I utter a silent prayer “Lord, bahala na po Kayo sa akin”… Those difficult persons are rest assured being coached, making them realize the consequences of their action.

  471. I did have a difficult person in my life and I am grateful that I was able to attract someone who was able to take me away from that difficult person. The Law of Polarity states that everything has an opposite and a bad situation has an equally good one. I believe that if we look for the good in our situation, more good will be coming our way.

  472. I can say that my mom, brother and my relatives (mother side) were difficult people to handle. We were of chinese tradition, however, the only difference is, these people are business minded people. They only care about money and material things and doesn’t care for relationship. it’s like a “what’s mine is mine” policy. The time we were in a financial crisis, my mom would borrow money from her siblings to pay me and my brother’s tuition fees. However, these people would refuse, or if we were lucky enough, they would indeed lend, but in a limited amount of time, you have to pay, otherwise, they would put additional interest on it. it’s like borrowing money from a mortgagor.

    Also, when i was still young, i would always want to go with my relatives, i hated my mom if we weren’t going with them on some places, now that i’ve matured, i realized that, we can’t come because we don’t have money. And that they weren’t inviting us to come with them because wala sakanila ang gagastos para sa amin. My mom hated that kind of feeling na parang minamaliit kami dahil wala kaming pera. It’s like your possession defines your existence. I saw how my mother changed. she became workaholic, and everytime she’s frustrated working, she gets easily angered. she always have tantrums. Then she and my dad always fight because of money. until they got separated dec. 3, 2009. It was really my lowest point in life, we were once happy, we don’t care about money, as long as we have each other we’re fine, and that God always provide something for us on time. But then because of money, everything was lost, respect, love and family.

    Then I’m living with my mom and brother, slowly i can see my brother becoming like my mom, cares about money. Although, unlike mom, he was ambitious. Also these two, i have to deal with their tempre problem everyday. school is stressful, but living with them adds stress. That sometimes, me too loses my own temper and ends up crying because of inis. Also i began to see that, they were both unhappy with their live, why? simple, because they hate to see me happy outside with friends. Ang sakin lang, how can i be happy at home, when upon arriving, they have a lot of commands like you’re a student/house helper. And since im a graduating nursing student, im so tired especially coming home from duty days. But still, i have to work, my mom doesn’t have work, my brother graduated without work as well. And I’m the only one going out of the house.

    My friends told me that maybe, wala silang ibang makita, kaya ako ang laging napapansin. My mom even told me that she wants me to stay away from friends, even my brother because they consider them bad influence. I don’t have vices, and even if these friends of mine have, they don’t influence me. In fact, they’re good people, and i serve as an inspiration to them because I’m different. I can say that I’m not like most teenagers. And also, when someone courted me, they never entertained him, instead they give him cold treatments. It’s like, they want me to be unhappy and stressful and alone. My mom even told me that, she wants me stay at home so that she wouldn’t see my laughing and smiling among my friends, rather how she would love to see me frown at home. My brother on the other hand told me that, when this guy courted me, i begin to be happy, which is not a good sign daw. And that really puzzled me, masama pala maging masaya. And now, i left my friends, i don’t go with them often, and i busted the guy who was courting me for thei sake, even if i’ve fallen for him already. and you know what they’re treatment to me now? I feel like I’m part of the family. It’s really sad though…=(

  473. my husband has been very difficult to understand nowadays. we had a small argument last december but until now he is using it to have an excuse to treat me badly.
    he has changed a lot since that argument, he is now so insensitive and selfish towards me, he puts his pride in his heart that he cannot accept and forgive me for my shorcomings which is i think not so big. he even tells me hurtful words. though i am thinking that he is doing this just to cover his affair to someone else. he’s not admitting that he has an affair, but there are instances that i had read some text messages from the girl and i can feel that there is something happening between them. our 2 kids are being affected on what is happening between us, they are not vocal about it but i know they are deeply affected.
    i’ve been trying to fix our relationship, tried to talk to him about the problem, but everytime we talk, he will just shrugged his shoulder and tell me “let me alone realize what happened to us, let’s just wait, kung para talaga tayo sa isa’t isa, tayo talaga naman pagdating sa huli”. this statement is not acceptable to me and hurts me more. tell me bro. bo what do you think he is? thanks

  474. 21 March 2011

    Sir Bo!

    Alam nio po ba na ang ginawa ng GOD sa aking buhay for the past 5 years. Ang mga masasamang tao ang nakatulong sa aming financial at di ang aking mga kaibigan. Di po ba Miracle!

    Marie

  475. I have a girl friend that her and I have been living togather for the pass five years. She has three kids thats not mind and one on the way that is mind. I have other kids from my first wife and a little girl that is eight by a pass relationship…she comes to the house every other weekend..My girl friend screem and curse at her three kids all the time,,,this has been going on from day one…I have spoke to her about that several times but with no change…I can never reason with her about anything. she curse and screem when my daughter is there,,,I can never sit down and talk with her about anything with she thinking that Im trying to start an argument….I try to let her know that im not trying to argue but she dont want to here what I have to say then she turns the talk into an argument. I dont like when she curse and screem at her kids, and I really dont like it when she dose it when my daughter is there…..Her kids screem and fight each other all day every day…they are disrespectful to me and their mom…they are 8,11, and 12…two boys and a girl…I have always tried to talk to her about not cursing and screeming at her kids from day one…but it still gos on…her 8 year old son choked and banged my daughter head on the wall the other day…this is the second time he has done that…I spoke with the mom about spanking her son,,,but there was no reasoning with her she got angry and started to make excusie why her son did that, then I got angry because there is no excuse….I pushed her in the process….

  476. I met a guy online that I consider one of the unexpected people entering my life. I think I am feeling something for him. Strange but I miss him so much. We were getting along just great at that time when we were still getting to know each other. Then I did something that made things ugly. I blocked him out of the blue. I got scared of the fact that I’m falling for somebody that I haven’t even met. How could that be possible? Yes, I could say that I pushed him away. I tried apologizing for a million times and just ended up doing and saying things that are out of this world. He just won’t forgive. He doesn’t want to talk to me. Now, he even labels me as a “sick” person. That deeply hurts me in a way only God knows. I started caring for a person who now views me as somebody unworthy of companionship. It’s been a while now since we really had a good conversion. I just pray and hope that we could forgive each other and start anew.

  477. I wanted to write my own experience with so many difficult persons in my life. But maybe, Bo made this blog for some to realize how blessed they are… just like me. As I read the comments along, I somehow felt relieved that I don’t have the same problems with you, friends. I know I have difficulties in my life as well. And I believe God will help me redirect this pain to success.

    I’ll pray for everyone here! :) God bless.

  478. This is somehow too late to share but I feel like sharing it before I read Bo’s answer on why difficult people is still considered as gifts and especially now that this creature ruined my day again. It is my sister-in-law. It all started in our water bill when we were spending our vacation in Manila. She got angry that I told her brother that I paid for the disconnection fee because of her negligence. That was the first time I told her that I advised my husband about her irresponsibility because I always tell him everything(he was away that time) that happens at home, he just never tell her he knew and to be honest, I did that intentionally to wake her up from her wrongdoings. Then every hidden hatred she kept inside her was revealed. She even called me names.

    Unfortunately, I am living with my husband and daughter in my-laws. And whenever she’s here, she does or says something that will strike me. Of course, I have no choice but to remember where I am even if I was already reaching my boiling point. She always makes things a big deal whenever I am involve. For example, just today, she sent message on my FB, checking for her daughter as she’s currently in Singapore, she already got angry because I was not able to reply to her right away, accusing me too that I logged out.

    I don’t know when this conflict will end. I hope soon.

  479. I can’t believe that a person would think and believe that God would allow a difficult person to abuse her or him physically and even emotionally. You just don’t say” I forgive you, you can hit me again tomorrow. I know God loves you and me and so if you hit me again. I will pray to God that I can take your punches.I will be stronger next time and of course, you will change some day. ”

    If Bo Sanchez thinks that it is okay and not comment on it while everyone is saying one thing or another in these comments and even writes that they accept the abuse and seeming to indicate and justify that God allows it so that you cannot do anything about it except accept.. well…. time to think and evaluate.

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